Scully floated. Not in a boat tethered to the jetty, not this time. The feeling more surreal, all encompassing, as through she'd been wrapped in the fabric of the universe. It pulled at her on a spiritual, emotional and intellectual level, requesting an answer to a question she couldn't quite formulate. The emotion confused her because Dana Scully didn't understand the context. What had come before, in the immediate minutes preceding her existence in this place? What would come after? At this precise moment Scully had no idea. Past and future failed to be, only the now occurred.
If she dared to open her tightly closed eyes, she might notice the sea of inky blackness surrounding her, filled with bright twinkling diamonds. The image floated in her mind's eye, not real but a construct allowing her imagination to ponder her answer to a question yet to be formed. The image fascinated her, consuming all of her attention. Overtaking her confusion, Scully allowed her mind to focus on the moment.
Where they really precious gems delighting in the night sky or chips of ice, floating on a dark, baron sea? Cold, Scully came to the sudden realisation with a shiver accompanying goose pimples, she felt so cold. A searing, freezing pain permeated every molecule of her body, all the way to the marrow of her bones. Scully needed to make a decision.
With the feeling of iciness, suddenly the question became clear. Did she stay, allowing the cold crystallise the water in her body, giving the sharp, pointed daggers the opportunity to shatter each cell, disintegrating her as a person. Or did she go, seeking warmth to thaw her mind and heart?
If she gave into the cold seeping into each and every cell in her body, if she left this beautiful, gem-filled reality, what would become of her? Memory came flooding back. The duality of her existence formed the pretext of the question she needed to answer. Put simply, did she stay with Mulder or did she go to him?
Would Dr Dana Scully, twenty five year old intern at Baltimore Hospital cease to exist if she chose the life she'd always known? Would the memory of the glorious three weeks she'd spent as Mulder's wife disappear forever from the mind of FBI special agent Scully? Or might she take the memories, the reality of either time with her, to the place she exited this time slip? And just where would her mind ended up? What would happen to her physical body if her sprit left? Might she return to 1998 with her current memories intact but leave her body a husk in this time period? How would it affect Mulder and her family?
Mulder, her mind moaned, how can I leave you, either of you? Why would I want to leave what we have in this time? It's so simple, pure, uncomplicated. Yet, if I stay, how much will I need to conceal in order to keep us both safe. What compromises will I be forced to make for the sake of our safety? In that other time, Mulder would understand, protect and aid me.
Remember what Missy and Mom told you about the time of your abduction, Scully turned her mind inward. Searching her memory, she recalled her mother and sister at her bedside in the days after she'd been returned. Upon waking, they spent hours with her. As had Mulder.
'Fox, he's devoted to you, Dana,' Missy said softy, almost wistfully during a visit. 'While you were missing, I've never seen anyone in such a dark, lonely place. It affected him at the very core of his being. He would have done anything to bring you back.'
'I spent time with your partner, Dana,' Maggie informed her daughter during another long session. 'I believe he felt the same depth of sorrow as I did when your father passed. The bond you have with that man is very special. Even as we considered giving up, he didn't. Fox never gave up on your returning to us. I'm glad he had the faith of his beliefs. It carried me through one of the hardest periods of my life.'
Is that what you'd do now? Scully asked the rhetorical question, considering how Mulder would react to her death in either time period. They'd only known each other a few weeks in this life. Yet in that time the bond between them had grown. Not to the same depth of understanding as her future Mulder. Still it had developed beyond anything she could have imagined in such a short period. Surely that has to mean something, Scully pondered, the question is what? Which Mulder's life do I devastate?
Returning to my own time, Mulder would sit and listen to my tale of this alternative reality. He'd believe every word and have some crazy theory as to why it happened. He'd take it as a sign I now believed alongside him, would blindly follow him on his journey, his ongoing quest for the truth. What would he expect of me with this history? Could I live with the knowledge I'd been so very happy here, in this time, with a Mulder without suspicion and paranoia? On the other hand isn't his belief what makes Mulder, well, Mulder?
Yet I still don't believe as he does, at least not completely. There has to be a scientific explanation for this time slip. Reasons why I've been send back. What else am I supposed to change, what new outcome am I to affect? Could this really be as simple as God's will and fate working together as my mother believes.
Who am I to believe and if I stay, what is my purpose? How will my defection to this time affect future Mulder? Or will I continue to exist in both realities?
While her soul, her sprit, her conscious pondered this dilemma, Scully fate became sealed by actions not her own. Warmth commenced its slow, creep into her body. Cell to cell, from the surface to the core, an infusion of heat stole over her. As her skin took comfort in the life giving return to normal temperature, she began to feel again. The goose bumps disappeared so she no longer shivered.
Scully's unconscious self-began to catalogue the stimulus from her surroundings. A silky material surrounded her body allowing her heat to remain close to the surface of her skin. Cuddling into the sensation, so foreign and yet familiar, stimulated Scully's sense of smell. The odour faintly reassuring, she knew it well, felt comforted by it. Slowly her other senses came out of the blackness into a faded fog she couldn't shake. This lack of complete perception didn't frighten her. Scully drifted with it, trying to take meaning from the awareness of her basic senses.
That voice, pleading with her to stay, sounded so desperate. Hadn't she just been pondering this situation, Mulder frantic she might leave him alone? In that instant, Dana Scully knew she'd do anything, say whatever, plead and pray to a God she didn't quite know if she still believed in, to stay with this Mulder. He'd give Scully the life she'd always wanted. It would be uncomplicated. Their relationship based on love and affection. They'd eventually have a child or two, allowing Scully to feel complete in whatever career she chose. Until this moment, until she could see it, feel it, almost taste it, Dana Scully didn't realise how much she wanted this simple life.
For just a moment in time, a mere glimmer of the life she once had beckoned. In that instant, Scully saw herself wake from a night of passion with Mulder. The familiar surroundings of her bedroom coming into focus. He spoke to her, smiled, and lent down to give her a good morning kiss. The memory of the beautiful dream she had, where they'd met before working together on the X-files began to fade. Her level of conscious once again submerged beneath the dark surrounding her at the same moment Dana Scully realised the time slip to be complete. She'd live out both lives, as the same woman in two very different realities. This part of her psyche would forever stay in the past. In the future, she'd only remember these three weeks as a faded dream.
'She's coming round,' Dave smiled with relief. Stethoscope in his ears, the EMT pumped up the pressure cuff. Listening carefully, he let out a sigh. 'Still a little on the low side, but normal and your wife's circulation is improving. The colour looks like its returning to her fingers. Do they feel any warmer to you?' he asked.
'Yes,' Mulder stated firmly whilst nodding, indicating he'd seen the evidence. He'd continued to hold her icy hand, their fingers entwined. Hazel orbs willed the woman on the gurney to return to him, because he didn't know how he'd go on without her. Although her lids fluttered, Dana didn't open her eyes. Wondering if she fought to stay with him, or attempted to go back to her own time, he silently willed her to choose him, to choose them and their life in this time together.
Refusing to let go, Mulder accompanied the unresponsive woman out of the ambulance and into the ER. Showing his badge seemed to give him the authority to remain at her side. He considered it a blatant misuse of his position but he simply didn't care. Mulder would do anything to keep Dana safe after the ordeal she'd endured because of him. Being just her husband wouldn't give him the credence to remain at Dana's side so the special agent demonstrated his most authoritative personality to achieve his goal.
'Agent Mulder,' the ER doctor asked for the third time, bringing him out of his introspection. Dr Elders smiled tightly. He'd allowed this charismatic individual to believe they'd swallowed his tale. In fact they allowed him access to his wife as a professional courtesy to Dr Scully-Mulder, 'can you tell us what happened.'
Nodding, he started his synopsis when Scully finally let out a moan. It sounded distinctly like his name. 'I'm here, Dana,' he responded in a soft, misty tone, 'open your eyes if you can hear me.'
The entire team waited with bated breath as the pale woman's eyelids continued to flutter. She appeared to use a vast amount of energy to finally expose her startlingly blue eyes. Unable to form the words to adequately express her fears, Scully moved her fingers enough to slightly squeeze Mulder's hand in recognition.
'Hey,' he leant over her, a broad smile covering his face, 'welcome back to the land of the living.'
Fighting to keep her eyes open, Scully silently asked about the investigation. She couldn't rest until she knew her abductors had been brought to justice. Understand, Mulder grimaced but answered her questions.
'We caught Joanna and Sharon,' he stated. 'They're in custody and Reggie is personally leading the interrogation team. Thanks to the special connection you share with your sister, we were able to locate you and their secret love nest in the tunnels below the university.'
'Missy,' Scully managed to croak.
'She felt you,' Mulder answered easily with a shrug of his shoulders not quite believing in or understanding the connection. 'Thanks to Melissa, we have enough to put them both away for a very long time. The evidence of their crimes covered the walls in the hidden room. We'll need your statement to tie up the loose ends.'
'How many,' Scully demanded, understanding she'd been the first victim in this particular crime spree.
'Six,' Mulder shuddered, 'possibly more. Reggie said the team only uncovered evidence they'd stalked you and started on another five women directly linked to the university. He left a team sifting thought photographs to determine if they actually intended to stop or just change location after the Christmas holidays.'
'Up scaling,' she asked sorrowfully.
'Looks like it,' Mulder returned.
Suddenly looking around her, Scully recognised not only the immediate area but most of the medical personal attending her. Glaring at Mulder with a horrified expression, Dana managed to get her message across.
'You Mom and Dad will be here soon,' he soothed, 'Missy and Charlie are in the waiting room. When we found you, you'd managed to escape. I thought,' swallowing hard, Mulder looked her in the eye and said the words terrorising his heart, 'I thought we'd lost you. I thought I'd lost you.'
'Cold,' Scully agreed, still working hard to keep the fog from once again claiming her. This time it didn't threaten to take her to that other place, the place of indecision, a ripple between to realities. She'd made her choice. Now her body demanded rest to overcome the shock of her experience.
'We're warming you now,' Dr Elders remarked, indicating the soft hum from the bear hugger machine. 'We'll keep you for observation until your temperature reaches normal. I'll take another look at you then, Dana. If you're feeling up to it, I believe you'll do better recovering at home. Like most doctors, you don't want to spend any more time here than you have too.'
'Thank you,' Scully managed, licking her dry lips.
'Here you go Dana,' a nurse Mulder had seen several times before offered him a mug filled with tea. 'I'll let this new, hansom husband of yours give you this. Make sure she drinks it slowly, letting it warm her from the inside,' she instructed with a raised eyebrow.
'Sweet,' Scully wrinkled her nose as the warmth hit her tastebuds.
'You need the sugar,' a kind smile hid the determination in the nurses' tone, 'as you well know doctor. Unless,' she threatened, 'you want to stay in overnight!' Returning her attention back to Mulder she demanded, 'make sure Dana drinks it all before she dozes again.'
'Yes, ma'am,' he answered.
'Done,' Scully pushed the cup away with their still entwined fingers, 'thank you.'
'You're welcome,' Mulder returned.
Letting out a yawn, Scully's lids fluttered closed and she fell into a peaceful sleep. The stress from her ordeal fell from her face, relaxing her features. Dr Dana Katherine Scully looked serene in her untroubled slumber. Feeling like he'd just been dismissed, Mulder turned to walk away. Dana's strong fingers refused to let go.
One look into her half opened left eye and that instant communication asked, 'where do you think you're going?'
'Just to the waiting room,' he lent down and whispered into her ear. The softly exhaled words felt like a zephyr across the area he knew to be one of her most erogenous zones. 'I thought you might like to see your parents,' Mulder sealed the promise of his return with a light kiss on her cheek.
Well here it is at last, the chapter, which, I hope answers all the questions as to why she stayed with past Mulder and what would have happened if she returned to her own time. I know the dream sequence is a real cop out but I felt it would have led to the beginning of Scully the believer we saw emerge in season six. Tell me what you think cause reviews are very welcome.
