Chapter 29; A New Day
I stared at the screen, my heart pounding in my ears.
I looked up to Justin, my mouth hanging open a bit. He was smiling, but slowly his smile fell from his face, wrinkles appearing to his forehead.
"Cody? You okay?" he asked. I looked at the screen and then back at him.
"You...You outed?" I asked. He blinked couple times and lifted himself up to lean on his elbow.
"Umm well yeah? Is that a problem?" he asked.
"Why..why would you do that?" I asked not answering his question. He looked at me for a moment and then sat up on the bed.
"Because I love you." he said and looked at me like I had gone crazy.
"And the whole wide world needs to know that then?" I asked and he looked even more confused.
"Well no but I thought it was a good idea-"
"You didn't even ask me!" I interrupted him. He took a breath like he was going to say something but staid quiet.
"Why is this a problem to you?" he asked and motioned something with his hand.
"Kinda...Because...it would have been nice if you had asked me first or something. I'm kinda a big part of this relationship here if you haven't noticed." I said squeezed my phone in my hand.
Justin seemed to think for a moment but then crawled to sit in front of me. He took my face in to his hands and looked me in the eyes.
"Of course you are. That's why I did it. I wanted the whole wide world to know that your mine and that I love you. I did this for you and for us." he said and tried to convince me with his eyes.
"Right?" he asked, eyes pleading something I wasn't sure I could give him. I slowly nodded and he pulled me in to a hug.
"This is a good thing. Everything will be okay." he said, voice muffled by my shoulder. I nodded again, but something was bothering me, like scratching my insides, a bad feeling about...something I couldn't tell yet.
Well the tweets went viral. They spread faster than the name of Kanye West's kids' name. My mum called and I put her on speaker. She informed me that she was happy for us and that it was on the news know. I huffed out a laugh that really didn't match what I was feeling inside. The bad aching feeling haven't gone away, but I smiled at Justin and laughed at my mum who told us she wanted cute Christmas pictures of us.
We left the next day. The tour was about to start and well our management were really not happy with us. Managers were pissed that we didn't tell them about our relationship and that now they had to do some kind of "damage control", what ever that meant. Justin told me that they would have just liked to out us their own way, which would have probably included some kind of big TV interview and dramatic things. He told me this was the better way to do it. I nodded, but couldn't quite meet his eyes.
A car came to get us around midday and drove us through the village and back to the airport. We climbed to the plain and I sat down on a seat by one of the windows. Justin made us some snacks and we watched a movie for the rest of the flight. Once the film ended, the captain informed us that we would we approaching the airport. We got dressed and landed and made our way to the VIP lobby. I said that I'd just use the toilet quickly.
I rested my hands on the cool stone surface of the counter. I opened the tab and watched as the water made it's way down the sewer. I looked up and took in my reflection. I wondered why I wasn't smiling. I mean I found the guy I loved, he loved me back, we just spent the weekend together, his parents liked. me.. This nagging voice somewhere inside me just wouldn't let me be. It was so deep somewhere that I couldn't quite hear what it was saying.
I looked down at my hand saw a small start that Justin had drawn there. It was sometime late last night when we had been talking about nothing and he took a pen and drew a start on my wrist. I asked why he did that he said that he just wanted me to remember that I had his start.
I looked up and saw that I was smiling. I smiled wider at my reflection and told myself that everything was fine. C'mon, I had a hot peace of meat waiting for me and he happened to be my boyfriend and he loved and cared for me like no other. Everything was fine. I washed my hands and smiled one last time happily at my reflection, suddenly very calm. I walked out whistling to myself. I came around the corner and saw Justin talking to John. I walked over to them and clapped John on the shoulder.
"Hey John! Long time no see!" I smiled. John smiled back, but it was a small and stressed smile.
"What's wrong? Has Anna kept you up all night?" I teased and punched him lightly on the shoulder.
John just smiled a bit and looked down. I looked at Justin but he looked stressed and worried. I stopped grinning and glanced between the both of them.
"What's wrong? Is Anna all right?" I asked suddenly worried.
"She's fine. We just have a...situation." John said and glanced at Justin and they shared a look that didn't promise me anything good.
"What kind of situation?" I asked. Justin turned to me and took me by the hand. John made a small grunt and Justin glanced at him and let go of my hand.
"Justin? What's going on?"
"Cody umm. You know the outing thing went viral right?" he said and looked it my eyes and I saw that he was trying to break it gently to me, what ever he was about to tell me.
"Yes of course I know that." I said impatiently.
"Well somehow the press found out that we'd be coming home today." he said and wore his worried-but-trying-to-be-strong expression. He was biting his lip, one eyebrow pushed down.
"So?" I asked. He sighed, looked down and then turned me around.
Behind the glass window of the VIP lobby, there must have been 70 paparazzi. Security had pushed them back a bit, but only a meter from the window. They were all yelling and snapping pictures, the flashes hurting my eyes. For a moment I felt like they were like huge tsunami, just waiting to knock down the window and stomp all over us, wash and drown us away. I felt panic rising in my chest, my breaths coming faster and I backed from away from the window. They kept yelling and even thought the thick glass,. I couldn't tell what they were saying, it was just a huge wall of sound.
"J-Justin?" I asked and tried to reach for him. I found his arm and forced myself to look away. He squeezed my hand lightly but then dropped it.
"It's better if we don't...Encourage them." he said and tried to smile but it just came out forced and wrong.
"What..what are we gonna do?" I asked and looked at John and Justin.
"We are going to get some more guards here and escort you guys out. It will be fine." John said and then his phone ringed. He mumbled "excuse me" and walked away. I looked back at the wall of paparazzi shouting behind the glass. When they saw I was looking, they started to shout louder and the flashed on their cameras flashed bright and frequent.
There really wasn't a place to hide in the lobby, there was just the big room and then the toilets so there really wasn't anything we could do except wait.
"C'mon don't look over there," Justin said and gently touched my arm, sliding his hand down and took my hand to his. The shouts immediately loudened, the flashed lighted up the room. Justin quickly let go of my hand and I really didn't want him to, I was feeling really scared and just small.
"No please don't let go." I said quietly and reached for his hand but he just shook his head and took a small step back. I looked at him really confused, hurt and scared
"What?"
"I..I just don't think it's a good idea to...do anything right now." he said slowly, picking his words carefully.
"What why not?" I asked in a broken voice.
"They'll just get more excited. It's just better this way babe." he said and smiled softly but he looked as worried as I felt.
"Oh okay. Sure. I understand." I said and looked around for somewhere to hide and really didn't understand.
"I'll just.. sit down." I said and pointed towards the lack leather couches with a weak hand movement. He nodded and said something about going to talk to John. I nodded and walked slowly over to the couches. I chose one facing away from the shouting guys and tried to block out their shouts and noises.
I looked over where Justin was deep in conversation with John. Their faces were serious and they kept glancing at me. I wanted to walk over there and ask what was going on but somehow I didn't manage to gather the strength anywhere. So I just sat there and studied my hands. As much as I tried to block out the shouts they just seemed to get louder and louder, the words blurring in to a big mass of yells that danced around my head mocking me, trying to brake me. The harder I tried, the louder the voices got and I squeezed the leather on the couch in my hands.
I bent my head down and rested my head on my hands and took a deep breath in.
"It will be okay. I'm okay, I'm okay." I told myself. There was no danger, I was good.
"Cody?" I heard Justin's voice and jumped a bit, being ripped away from my thoughts. I looked up and saw that Justin was looking at me with a determined and solemn expression, but I saw the worry hiding in his eyes.
"Yea?"
"It's time to go." he said and I nodded and stood up. I turned around and faced the glass wall and the paparazzi behind it. It looked like the word had gone around and they had multiplied. I looked to my side and saw Justin next to me and thirty bodyguards and more were outside already trying to push the people back. I looked at Justin and he smiled at me trying to make me feel better.
"I'll go first and you follow me. Don't let go of my hand okay? Just keep your head down and keep squeezing " Justin said to me in a low voice and I nodded.
"Okay you ready?" he asked me. I nodded again and he started to move towards the door. We approached the door and he squeezed my hand and I did the same back. Just a meter from the door, Justin moved to walk in front of me and I took a deep breath and then the door opened and chaos broke loose. The shouts were loud inside, but once I stepped through the door, it was so much worse. They kept shouting our names, asking questions, one trying to be louder than the next and that just ended up everyone yelling form the top of their lungs. I heard my name all over again, parts of questions, a word here, another there. The guards were trying to push the paparazzi away but they were pushing right back. The guards shouted and tried to clear the couple of meters to our car, but the paparazzi were shoving them so the first meter wide path kept shrinking and shrinking until I felt the bodyguard's bodies pressing to mine. The space around me was getting smaller and smaller and my heart was beating faster and faster. I was taking small fast breaths and all I could see was flashing lights, peoples yelling faces, hands, arms jackets everywhere, blocking my view. I was pushing forwards, and I felt that I just couldn't do this any more I couldn't go on, it was over, I was over, I wouldn't survive. Then it went dark and I realized I was inside a car and it was moving fast forward. I stared forward at the leather seat in front of me. I kept staring blankly forward even when Justin talked to me. He kept saying my name over and over again. Then he turned my head towards him and I slowly focussed on his face.
"Cody! Are you okay?" he half shouted.
"Yea...yea I'm...fine. I'm fine." I said and he kept staring in to my eyes worriedly. He caressed my face gently with his hands. I closed my eyes and focussed on the touch. He pulled me closer and rested me against his chest.
"It's okay. All is good now." he whispered and I just melted there, forgot about the world, just his voice slowly circling in the air, wrapping around me and making me feel okay again.
"It's okay now, all is good." I told myself too.
We drove for and I was huddled against Justin's chest. We drove and I kept feeling the lowering of his chest, the breath in my hair. We drove and his voice kept making me feel okay again.
Suddenly there was a loud bang and I jerked up. I looked around and saw that we were at the hotel, just outside the gates and there were people all around the car. The paparazzi pressed their cameras against the car windows and they hit the glass over and over again, making loud banging noises. Some of the pressed their faces to the window, but they were darkened so I didn't think they saw anything. I pressed closer against Justin and shivered. The silence was long gone, replaced with loud bangs, yells, arms hitting the car. I felt like the car was shrinking, the doors moving closer to me, panic rising in my chest. They kept shouting our names, telling us to look over here, Cody here here look here! I was shivering in Justin's arms, squeezing my eyes shut, willing it to be over.
"Can't you get through already?" Justin snapped at the driver and held me closer.
"Just a moment." he said and then the car moved past the gates and they closed behind us.
The silence was back. The shouts faded away when we pulled through the gates. I heard a loud metallic clang when the gates closed. I just sat there and looked at my hands.
"Cody?" I heard Justin ask
"Yes?" I said quietly.
"Are you okay?" Honestly, I had no idea.
We walked inside the hotel and rode up to my floor. Justin came with me without even asking. He knew I wanted him there. He ordered some food and I sat on the bed, looking at the television. I didn't see anything, just stared at the screen without actually registering anything. Moments later Justin came to sit next to me. He pulled the blanket on top of us and pulled me to his arms. He rested his chin on top of my head and I leaned in to his chest. I listened to his heartbeat and didn't think about anything.
"I'm sorry." he said suddenly.
"About what?" I whispered.
"This. I didn't didn't know this would blow up in our faces." he said and I nodded.
"It's okay." I whispered again and he kissed my hair.
"Sleep now." he said and I closed my eyes.
Morning came with sunshine and the smell of breakfast. I opened my eyes and saw Justin buttering a toast. He was shirtless, wearing only boxers. I smiled and lifted up from the bed to a sitting position. He looked over his shoulder and smiled at me.
"Good morning babe." I smiled at him and he turned around carrying a tray. He walked over to the bed and laid the tray to my lap. It had toast, fruits, eggs and bacon.
"Wow, breakfast in bed." I said and he chuckled.
"Only the best for you." he said and kissed my cheek. He then walked to his side of the bed and came back under the blankets. He laid on his side and watched me. With one quick hand movement he stole a peace of bacon from the plate.
"Hey! I thought this was my breakfast." I said and smiled. He staid silent and just stared at me.
"What?" I asked, getting uncomfortable under his gaze.
"It's just good to see you smiling. You were in a quite shock yesterday." he said and I looked at my plate, the feelings and memories of yesterday coming back to me. The fear, the panic the sounds, yells, banging.. I shook my head and forced on a smile.
"Well I might have overreacted a bit. It wasn't really that bad." I said, and told myself that that was true.
"Good. It will settle down soon. We're yesterday's news in a week or so." he said and I nodded silently, my smile long gone. He poked my side and my hips jerked to the side.
"Hey watch it! I have breakable things in my lap!" I exclaimed, half laughing.
"There we go. Wasn't so hard was it?"
"What was?"
"Laughing." he answered and I rolled my eyes.
"Shut up." I said and he only narrowed his eyes and smirked.
"Oh no you will not. I have plates and glasses here!" I tried but he only laughed.
"I have a fork?" I tried but he only smiled wider. He slowly got up to a sitting position and lifted up the tray from my lap. He put it to the bedside table and then sat down on top of my legs.
"What are you doing?" I asked him and he chuckled.
"I'm gonna make you laugh." he smirked and then dived in. He sneaked his hands under the blanket that was covering my waist and under my top. He tickled my sides and I giggled like a small girl.
"Oh c'mon not fair!" I tried to yell between gasps of air. He only laughed with me and tickled me even more. Water was pouring down my eyes and I pressed myself against the headboard of the bed.
"Justin! P-please!" I pleaded him and he laughed. Then he leaned down and started kissing my neck and my cheeks, forehead and just all over where he could reach. I tried to sqruim away, but he was holding me down from my hips. His hands slid up my sides, pushing my top up with it. He kissed my neck and my collar bones, tickling me, making me jerk up and laugh, sliding down the headboard bit by bit.
Suddenly he just stopped and stared at me.
"What?" I asked when he didn't stop.
"Nothing. You're just..Beautiful." he breath out and looked down surprised and a bit embarrassed.
"Hey now." he said and cupped my face with his both hands, forcing me to look at him.
"Don't be ashamed. It's the truth." he said quietly and then leaned in and pressed his lips on mine. I closed my eyes and just let the feelings wash over me. I felt his soft lip, trying to make me understand something he felt. I heard the quietness of the room, smelled Justin, felt his hands on my face, his breath on my face.
Maybe everything would turn out okay after all.
The next morning rolled around and I woke up in Justin's arms. We didn't do anything the day before, just staid in bed, ate and watched films. And I was okay with that.
Today we had some preparations to do for the tour, a photo shoot and some meetings. We woke up around nine, ate breakfast and then the stylists and hair dressers came in. Anna walked in and gave us both a big hug.
"Nice to see you guys again. I heard that yesterday was quite hectic." she said with a small smile.
"Yea I guess it was." I agreed, not really feeling like talking about it.
"So today you have promo picture shoot for the tour and later tonight an interview." she said reading from her Ipad.
"Where is the interview?" Justin asked.
"It's the same lady you had the last time, before the gala. Kerrie Underwood." she said looking at the screen.
"Great."I murmured and sat down on a chair so the hairdressers could get to work. Justin looked at me curiously and sat down next to me.
"Well I mean she's like the gossip queen, she'll probably squeeze out everything there is to know about our relationship, first kiss, nicknames, in what position did we have sex for the first time etc." I listed and heard Anna almost choke in her water.
"You guys had sex?" she almost screamed. I looked up and realized my mistake.
"Oh shit." I mumbled to myself and looked at Justin. He looked embarrassed and amused the same time.
"Justin Drew Bieber" Anna started but Justin cut in before she started her lecture.
"It's fine Anna! We did it all by the book, we did the I love you's before and took it slow and used protection and everything. It's really fine." he said and I felt my face get one shade redder with every word. I sank lower on the chair and happened to look in the mirror and saw the hairdresser smiling at me. She winked and said quietly:
"Adults right?" And I chuckled.
"Yea." I smiled and she got back to work.
Justin and Anna were still talking or more like arguing and as much as I tried to ignore them, I really couldn't.
"So I should have called you before that hey I'm about to bang Cody, is that okay or what?" Justin asked in an annoyed voice.
"No of course not, I'm not some kin of pervert! I'm just saying that you could have informed me-"
"So called you right before-"
"No I'm not saying that, stop being dramatic. I'm just saying that I want you guys to be safe and do it right." they argued, but in a sister and brother way, not really mad at each other way.
"We did it right, I told you!"
"So what kind of protection did you use?"
"Oh my god Anna! I am not talking to you about this!"
"Well would you rather talk to me or your mother?" she asked challengingly. I saw Justin's eyes widen and started to see the amusing side of this conversation.
"You wouldn't." Justin said after a small pause.
"Oh I will. So you better start talking cowboy." Anna said, her hands on her hips and a smile broke to my face.
"Fine! We used a condom. Are you happy now?" Justin huffed.
"Who was on top?"
"ANNA!"
"I just want to know so that who ever was on the bottom got prepared right!" she answered and I saw Justin sinking down on his own chair.
"Prepared just how?" I asked and Anna seemed to notice I was there.
"You know get all stretched out before so nothing ruptured or anything-"
"ANNA!" Justin shouted again.
"Justin I am like your mother sometimes when we're travelling, so if you are not telling her these stuffs, she won't able to ask theses questions-"
"My mum would never ask me who was on top!" Justin shouted and I started to laugh on my seat with the hairdresser.
"-so I have to do it. And you are going to tell your mother."
"I so am not going to tell her!"
"Oh you are. "
"And why on earth would I do that?"
"Because you need to tell her that you have a boyfriend now and talking about that boyfriend, does Cody's mum know?" Anna said and my laugh was cut short. Justin turned to me and smiled
"Yea Cody, does your mother know?"
"I umm... I yes?" I squeaked out.
"Well she needs to be informed."
"About what?" I asked.
"That her baby boy is having sex of course!" Anna said like it was the most obvious things in the world.
"Oh no, Nonononononono. No." I said. Justin crooked his head to the side and looked at me with big eyes.
"But baaaabe. If my mum is going to know then yours should too." he whined and I only shook my head repeatedly.
"No. No. Way. In. Hell." I said and Justin stuck his lower lip out.
"But babe-"
"no."
"But-"
"No!"
"It doesn't really matter what you guys say, I'm going to tell them." Anna interrupted us. Both of our heads snapped to her.
"What?" we asked in unison.
"Yep, but get ready now." Anna said and walked out.
We just sat there in silence for a full five minutes.
"We should call them shouldn't we?" Justin asked after a while.
"Yep."
Authors Notes:
Hellooooo. Hope you enjoyed the drama and then the fluff.
And reminder to everyone to read my Christmas Special aaaand then my first ever one shot. They are both Codstin so enjoy! You can find them in by clicking my neon face or on tumblr by going to the front page and then on left side there is box called "fics".
And btw under that bow is another box called "fic rec list" so there is a lsit of fics that I have read and found really good. So check them you will ya?
Tweet me and tell me what ya think!
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And guys, remember safe sex! :)
-neongiraffe
