Demi P.O.V

"You'll be fine...I'll be right in here." Nick reassured me, rubbing my back.

I nodded, giving him one last glance before walking out of the kitchen and into the living room where my dad sat nervously.

"I'm glad you called." I sat down across the table from him, on the couch while he sat in one of the chairs.

"I need to sort this out."

"Demi, I don't deserve your forgiveness...I don't even deserve you, not after what I've put you through these past eight years. I can't turn back time...I can't go back and change the things I did to you...however much I want to, I just can't."

"Why did you cheat on mom? Why are you married to her now?"

"Your mom and I had problems way before you were born. We were both young kids and when she got pregnant again with you it just tore us apart. We planned to split for the sake of each other, but we realised that you and Dallas were much more important. We stayed together for the two of you. It didn't work; your mom and I would have constant arguments about the wellbeing of Dallas and you. Shortly after that I met Frankie and everything just seemed to fit into place."

"So what you decided to have a child with her too?" I spat, all of my emotions coming out in every word I spoke.

"It wasn't planned...I mean Emily wasn't supposed to happen like that. We were going to wait...I was going to leave your mom but still support you kids-"

"What happened dad because you haven't supported me since the day mom died?" I sobbed, clenching my fists at the side of the couch.

"Your mom...she found out about Frankie and me."

"Did she leave your sorry ass or did you beat her as well, which one dad?" I screamed, causing him to flinch and sit back further into the cushions on the couch.

"I would never beat her...she was my wife-"

"And I'm your daughter...how is that different?" I sunk back into the couch, losing all of the energy I had hours before.

"It's not different Demetria-"

"No. You don't get to call me that." I didn't even lift my head to see his facial expression and to be honest I didn't care.

"Demi-"

"Mom found out so what did she do?" I questioned, still looking down at the ground, not finding enough strength to look at my own father. "Dad?" I shouted a bit louder now, making my own ears twitch at the loudness of my voice.

"I'm telling you this...but I want you to know that I wouldn't have done it in the first place if I knew this was going to happen." I finally looked up; confused as to why he would say that. What had happened that was so bad...I mean apart from my mom dying.

"W-what happened?" Nervousness suddenly spread all around my body, sinking deep into my pores.

"When your mom found out about Frankie and I she was...angry and completely destroyed. She didn't think that anyone would ever hurt her as bad as I did...I didn't know what to do after that so I just...left."

"You just left mom on her own with two kids...two kids who needed both of their parents...you are something dad." I shook my head, trying to stop the tears that had pooled in my eyes to flood out.

"I didn't hear from her for about a week...I was worried about Dallas and you. I went round to the house and I thought nobody was in...I thought that you were all out, so I...went upstairs and I-I...found her...lying there...still." His face contorted as tears spilled out of his eyes. His hands stayed put at his sides, not caring about the tears that fell onto the couch or his clothes.

"W-what...sh...she."

"Let me finish Demi."

"No I won't let you finish...you killed her...you and that other woman. She didn't get killed in an attack...she committed suicide because you hurt her real bad dad. How...how could you do that...she loved you...we all loved you." I spoke harshly, making sure he knew how much hatred I had for him.

"Demi please-"

"Don't! Don't you dare beg for me...I hate you...you hurt her so bad that all she could do was kill herself. Do you not get it dad...it was you...your fault. She didn't deserve any of it...and now look where she is."

"Demi-"

"You're so unbelievable...after all that you've done...I thought about forgiving you...I didn't sleep for nights straight because I struggled to come to the fact that my own dad...my own blood would hurt me. I hated it...I thought about all the good memories we had...and the only ones we had were with mom...after that you suddenly hated me...hated your own daughter...and now I know why...I reminded you every single day that it was you who killed mom...your actions that led her to take her own life." I stood up from the couch, anger running wild throughout my veins. "Eight years down the line and your own daughter tried to take her own life because of you...all because you didn't treat me...or love me the way you should have done. You didn't care for me...all you cared about was your 'other' family. After mom died...I needed you...I needed you like I needed oxygen b-but you just left. I'm your daughter and you just left me...I was eleven years old, that's it dad and you just left me alone for the whole weekend. I didn't even know what to do...I had no one apart from you...and you just left me. After that day I got weaker...and you didn't even notice because you were never fucking there. I cut because of you. I cut because you hated me and didn't love me. I cut because I was the disappointment. But I'm not dad...it took me six years to realise it...it was never my fault...I wasn't the disappointment...you were. You played us all...and as for me...I don't want to see you ever again. I can't see you again...not with what you did." I turned my back to him and started to walk to the kitchen where Nick was situated. "Don't worry, I'll pack my bags and leave your precious house...and I'll find somewhere to stay...not like you'd really care. Bye dad." Before I even took one step, the couch squeaked and he started to speak.

"I know you hate me...but I never intended to hurt you. The things I did to you were not the actions of a father...I hate myself for the way I treated you...I should never have done any of the things I did to you...you deserved someone who would care for you and love you...after your mom died I knew that I couldn't do that...I knew that you would be better off without me. You're right on some level, I left because you reminded me of how bad of a father I had been...you reminded me how much of a failure I was to your mother and you kids. I hurt you...physically because...you look exactly like she did when she was your age...and I couldn't deal with seeing her face and knowing how much I had fucked up...I hit you so you wouldn't look like her...I hit you because your mom never had a purple bruise on the side of her face...or a cut on her cheek. The more I hurt you...the less you looked like her...so I carried on. I'm ashamed for the way I've acted towards you. I know it's hard to believe but...I love you...you're my daughter and I know I won't ever get the chance to see you or call you that again...but it's true...I love you and I'm so proud of where you've come and the person you are today...your mom...she...she would have been so proud. I'm sorry I took her away from you...I can't change anything...but if I could...I would change that day...not for me...but for you. And for the house...stay here...I don't want it...it's yours. I'll sign the papers and it'll be all yours...your mom she...left you girls some money...Dallas had hers when she turned eighteen...and I wasn't around for yours but...I've transferred it into your bank account...there should be enough to last you for the next three years...I'll send money for groceries and I'll pay the bills...just keep safe and please...don't waste time on me...don't waste your last teenage years thinking about the what if's and buts...just live your life the way you would...and not the way anyone else would." He looked at me sadly and then turned his back to the door, ready to leave me for good this time.

"I don't want your money dad...I don't want the guilt money-"

"It's not guilt money Demi...just accept it please...I don't know what else I can do with it. I'd rather you live a life where you can be happy, than live a life where you're scraping around for money to buy a packet of chips...I know I don't deserve you to listen to me after all I've done...but I'm just trying to help you...after all these years of being absent and cruel to you...I just want to help you out financially...just let me do it for the first six months and if you want it to stop...then I'll stop."

"Okay." He nodded and his back muscles relaxed under his shirt.

"Bye Demi." My heart pounded in my chest as his hand turned the handle on the door. This was it. He was leaving for good and he was never coming back. I would never see him again. I should be happy...but I was nowhere near happy. I missed him and he was just five paces away from me. I shouldn't have done it but I did.

"Dad...wait." I closed my eyes as the words flew out of my mouth. He stopped his movements and turned to face me. "I hate you right now and I probably will for the next few months...or even years...but don't give up on me dad...I need time...and maybe...a few months or years from now...you'll get a call from me and we'll work it all out. We'll get to the place where we should be as father and daughter...maybe just maybe...I'll learn to love you again. Just please don't give up on me again...time is all I need."

"I can wait...I'll wait for you if that's what you need. Even in ten years' time when you're married and you have your own family, if you still hate me then I'll be okay with it. Because I know you and as much as you think I don't...I do. I know that you gave me a chance...I know that you thought about calling me...because that's the type of person you are...you forgive people even when they don't deserve it. And I for one don't. I don't deserve even a slither of your forgiveness...the fact that you've given me hope that after all of this blows over we could be like we were when mom was alive shows me...that you're even more like your mother than I thought you were. You amaze me Demi...and Nick he's a lucky boy. Goodbye Demi." He savoured his last full look at me, knowing that he wouldn't see me again for another three or four years or maybe he'll never see me again, time will tell.

I watched as he walked out of the door. His figure fading into the distance as he walked out of my house...and surely out of my life.

I was excited for what was too come and who was to stay and who was to go.

Maybe I'll call him in two months to ask him to attend my high school graduation. Maybe I'll never speak to him again. Maybe in ten years' time, he'll get a call from me asking him to walk me down the aisle. Maybe I'll carry on with my life not knowing that he committed suicide the day I last saw him. Who knows? The truth? Nobody. Nobody knows how my life is going to turn out. Not even God. And for that exact reason...I'm happy.

Happy that I can live my life the way I want to.

Happy that I don't have everything set out for me already.

If you would have asked me when I was eight, asking where I would want to be in ten years' time, this would have been my answer;

Good grades, nice boyfriend...happy family.

Never in a million years would I have thought that this would be my life in ten years' time;

Self-harmed at the age of twelve to eighteen, rehab for three months, abused by my own father, neglected by my own father, good grades, good friends, and I haven't got a nice boyfriend. I have a perfect boyfriend, who's also my best friend.

I would rather have the second option than the first. Sure the second option has A LOT of struggles but I have Nick and he's my saviour. Whenever I would have a bad day...he was there. He stuck by me through a lot...through stuff that not many people would.

So yeah I would rather face the struggles that I faced with Nick by my side...than have a perfect life.

I am truly and utterly in love with you Nicholas Jerry Jonas.