Disclaimer: See chapter 28.

To the REVIEWERS of chapter 28: Giant-sized chocolate chunk cookies go to CuteKittten (with 3 t's...lol), Bluebird Soaring, Dragowolf, Kesera, Violetlight, lady tecuma, i-love-me-some-leggypoo, Xerios, and Hearts of Eternity for getting all or part of what the metaphors stood for in chapter 28. You guys rock! Chocolate chip cookies go to flamingmarsh, ArmoredSoul, TransFlashbacks, and Lecidre for still reviewing chapter 28, even when the content wasn't so clear, and letting me know they still loved my descriptions. Thanks guys. That really means a lot to me.

Xerios, Xerios, Xerios!! Holy crap! I just about died when I saw all those reviews! OMG, thank you, thank you, thank you! That was amazing. I sincerely thank each and every one of my readers that have reviewed over the months, but Xerios came on and reviewed 20 chapters at once! Dude, that was an epic marathon run of reviewing. I am forever grateful. I cannot thank you enough! This chappie is for you, my friend.

Thanks so much for adding me and my story to your:

[Favorite Story]: Emory Lee

[Story Alert]: Xerios

Thanks you two *smiles*

Fanfiction started a 'Reader Traffic' tracking function at the end of July, 2008. The first full month of tracking was August, 2008. I knew I had readers from other countries, but didn't realize just how many. It is somewhat daunting...intimidating even... I had no idea how far this thing was reaching! So, the total visiting countries (from most to least visitors) for the month of August were: USA, Canada, UK, Australia, Germany, Mexico, Finland, Sweden, Italy, Austria, Netherlands, New Zealand, Philippines, Costa Rica, Poland, Ireland, Spain, Denmark, Peru, Hungary, Chile, Portugal, Asia/Pacific Region, Hong Kong, Indonesia, Russia, Japan, Taiwan, and Iraq! Amazing!

Eternal thanks goes to Karategal, lady tecuma, Hearts of Eternity, grlwdgrntrk, Violetlight, and Phoenix13 for letting me play with their ideas. The name, Nightfire, belongs to lady tecuma from 'Sparks and Plasma,' 'Curse of The Little Feet,' and 'Guns And Cyber Roses.'

Thanks to lady tecuma for beta-reading this for me and answering all my insecure, 'is this okay?' questions...LOL.

Caution: There are a couple things in this chapter that might be unsettling to some of you. However, these are aliens and they would do things differently from us anyway. Plus, this is a mature story. All I ask is that you keep an open mind. It might not be anything, but I thought I'd just put a warning in here, just in case. Of course, if you're still reading this story, then you've seen plenty of unsettling moments already, so this will seem like nothing...LOL! Maybe you'll even cheer Ratchet on (smile).

NOTE: This chapter should clear up what chapter 28 was all about, but I will go ahead and say that what was happening. What you read in ch. 28 was what Ironhide and Chromia experienced when they joined during their initial recovery. It also shows that they are each other's entire universe, like I portrayed when they joined briefly in chapter 4. The black hole in their universe did not appear until after Sunshadow died. The reason they had such a hard time joining, as Chromia recovered from the wounds inflicted upon her at Floatilla, was because of the black hole and what it represents to them during their most intimate moments. If you want, read chapter 29 and then go back and read chapter 28. I put that chapter in this because I really wanted to convey what Ironhide and Chromia experience through their bond.

This chapter is a flashback that follows the flashbacks in chapter 27 and includes what is happening in chapter 28.

Enjoy!

Night Fire

Chapter 29

Catch-22

by Litahatchee

Catch-22: A predicament that is impossible for one to get out of because of another predicament...You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't.

--

Orns had passed since the Floatilla Massacre... almost a vorn. The Autobots were losing battle after battle, thanks to Megatron's new 'secret weapon.' The secret weapon was no secret to Optimus Prime, however; a secret weapon that Optimus could not locate no matter how hard he tried, and Megatron made sure of that, never failing to taunt Optimus over that fact.

However, the battle that concerned Ratchet, at the moment, was the battle in the med bay. Many of the bonded patients suffering from sparkshock had already succumbed to their fates...and the number of battle damaged patients from the recent battle losses had been mounting.

Then, there was Ironhide and Chromia...

Not only were the Autobots losing their battles, but so was Ratchet. The only one that seemed to be successful in what he was doing was Ironhide. Optimus did not agree with Ironhide's reasons, but it was as Ironhide had said before, Optimus was in no position to disagree, either. If Ironhide could continue to be successful in exacting his guerrilla tactics on the Decepticons, then that could be considered a victory, despite the fact that it was for revenge.

Ratchet argued his point time and again. They were going to lose Chromia if Ironhide did not stay with her until her systems were preforming at optimal levels. Optimus understood that and he was painfully aware that he would lose two of his best warriors, but he could not afford to divert his attention from his own situation with Elita, not to mention the mounting losses because of this situation.

It was a catch-22:

If Megatron continued to gain all the information and secrets that he could wrench from Elita One's CPU, the Autobots were going to lose the war. If he finally decided to just kill Elita, Optimus Prime would die.

If Chromia died, Ironhide would die.

The Autobots could not afford to lose any of them, and they could not afford to lose any more battles. The Autobots were willing to claim any victory over the Decepticons, however it came.

Optimus had to focus on finding Elita. For the time being, the more Decepticons Ironhide could kill, the better. However, Optimus left it up to Ratchet to find a way to get through to Ironhide about Chromia's waning health.

And Ratchet tried just about everything, from conventional to unconventional. He was determined that Chromia was not going to die. She was going to make it, and he was willing to do anything to make sure.

During the earliest stages of the recovery, all Ratchet had to do was argue with Ironhide and Ironhide would eventually do what he was told. However, now it was all Ratchet could do to get him to listen to him at all. He tried talking to him. He tried telling him that what he was doing was hurting Chromia. He tried to get Ironhide to see and face his fears, but everything that Ratchet said to him didn't seem to be getting through.

Then, they'd had to resort to physically forcing them. Ratchet did not like having to do that. It was difficult for all involved. Thus far, they'd only done it once...

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Ironhide had been gone longer than usual. Nightfire had been transferring energy to Chromia via her CPU port for several orns, much to Chromia's continued distress. However, Nightfire was the only medic that Chromia would allow to even touch her CPU port at all.

Ironhide eventually came back, but whether that was from an underlying knowledge that Chromia was not okay, or Ratchet's words finally getting through to him, or just the need for his spark to seek out its other half, Ratchet wasn't sure. As soon as Ironhide walked into the med bay, Ratchet told him he had to join with Chromia. Ironhide went into her room and Ratchet gave them some time, but their sparks remained distant from each other, their frames seemingly content to just sit together.

Chromia was very obviously hiding her true condition from Ironhide. Ratchet went in to tell him otherwise, that Chromia's systems relied on Ironhide, but they both still adamantly refused to join. It was then that Ratchet called both Wheeljack and First Aid into the room.

Ratchet told Ironhide and Chromia what he intended to do. He even gave them a choice to join on their own.

"Either way, you're going to join right now. So, what's it going to be?" Ratchet said to them.

Neither one of them actually said anything. They looked away from Ratchet and away from each other.

It took both Ratchet and Wheeljack to hold onto Ironhide while First Aid held onto Chromia. Ironhide and Chromia struggled, but their chestplates opened automatically, much to Ratchet's relief. Having to pry open their chestplates while holding them down was going to be the most difficult part. The fact that it happened automatically was a testament to how much their sparks needed each other. The three medics basically just pushed the two sparks together.

The tension from the struggle and the tension released from the sudden contact of the two desperate sparks caused a small explosion that blew both Ratchet and Wheeljack away from Ironhide. However, Ironhide's spark latched on to Chromia's and the joining was successful and complete.

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While the joining was successful, Ratchet now had yet another patient. He had escaped the explosion pretty much unscathed. Wheeljack, on the other hand, took the full brunt of it. Wheeljack had been burned worse than this before, but it did knock him off his feet for an orn or so.

During his rounds, Ratchet went in to check on Wheeljack.

"Why is it that every time there is an explosion, you are the one that gets hurt?" Ratchet asked him as he ran a scan over Wheeljack's burns.

"Well, Ratch," Wheeljack replied good-naturedly. "You know how much I like explosions. This one just caught me by surprise, that's all."

As Ratchet finished looking over Wheeljack, he knew this method of 'coerced-joining' wasn't going to work. The explosion took them all by surprise. He couldn't risk anyone else getting hurt. Now, Ironhide was just avoiding him entirely and the experience didn't seem to make Ironhide and Chromia any more willing to join on their own than before. Ratchet had to think of something else.

Upon leaving Wheeljack, Ratchet ran into Nightfire...who maintained a facade of outer composure, as composed as a snappy Decepticon could look...when, actually, she was struggling more and more...taking it one orn at a time, sometimes even only one joor at a time. However, Ratchet didn't know that.

Wheeljack had been giving her the magnetic pulse therapy quite regularly and, as far as Ratchet was concerned, she seemed to be handling her sparkshock just fine. He thought that her sense of purpose might have been what was preserving her spark for longer than the others.

"I don't understand why it is so difficult to get them to join," Ratchet's voice interrupted Nightfire's thoughts. "Bonded sparks want to be whole. There is a natural need for them to merge. Why are they fighting that?"

What struck Nightfire the most about it, since she understood what it was like to be bonded, was how they could fight that urge. It was a strong need and desire for every bonded spark to be whole. Being able to deny that wasn't easy to do. A jolt of pain coursed through her chest at the mere thought of being whole.

Nightfire was not involved in the struggle to get Ironhide and Chromia to join, at least not directly. She was very involved with Chromia's health and helping her to accept what had happened, but she could not bear to watch any spark join with another. Her own spark would never be whole again. The pain it caused her to even know every time that they had finally merged was too much.

Nightfire tried to occupy herself with other things during those times. When she couldn't handle keeping her facade, she found a quiet corner to anguish in, alone and desperate. The Decepticon in her wouldn't allow anyone to know how much she was suffering. The medic in her was very happy that Chromia would gain strength after every joining and she dutifully monitored Chromia's systems once Ironhide was out of the way, all the while her spark pulsing in agony.

"There has to be something there that wasn't there before," Nightfire responded to Ratchet's query, doing her best to ignore her tormented spark. She wasn't sure if Ratchet actually expected her to answer, but now that she had, he looked like he was listening.

Nightfire wasn't quite sure how it would be, herself, since she had never had a sparkling, but she knew what it was like to be bonded and that a bonded pair essentially created their own universe. Several femme creators at Floatilla had told her that their sparklings had become a part of that universe in one form or another, so that was undoubtedly the case for all Cybertronian creators, including Ironhide and Chromia.

"Think of joined sparks as having their own universe," Nightfire explained. "Everything that each sparkmate feels and does is reflected in that universe. Perhaps their sparkling was like a star, or a galaxy, in their universe and...well, now he's a black hole..."

"Primus," Ratchet whispered.

If that was the case, this was only going to get more and more difficult. He was going to have to come up with something that would shock them into staying together. Otherwise, they'd continue avoiding each other and denying their own sparks because of what they were dealing with when they merged, because of what they were dealing with in their inner universe.

Ratchet had no idea how to heal that universe, but if he didn't get Chromia's outer being healed, their inner universe didn't stand a chance.

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