(Soulmates)

This one's for "FairyArtLover" & "Mystic_Night" on ao3

Thank you guys for asking me to do a part two of the body swap soulmates. Despite wanting to do this I actually had no idea how to do this… it happens.

I'm here, I'm queer! And yes, I'm trying to keep the comments at an even number, it bothers me. I love comments, but still…


29. The other side of the coin

Connor had ended up in plenty of weird places when high, but waking up in a house other than his own took the cake. The worst part? Connor hadn't even had anything last night.

He was in a small room that he didn't recognize, completely alone, feeling doozy. When he tried to sit up he felt an extra weight on him, it seemed to come from his left arm; when he got it out of the sheets he decided this was some extremely realistic lucid dream.

Staring at him was a white cast with his own name drawn over it like a claim. There was something to be said about Connor's subconscious if this was the mistake he was dreaming of.

He got up, feeling odd, and looked down to see he had pajama pants; that was new. With this sense he heads towards the wardrobe, if he's lucid dreaming that means he can change his clothes, probably, Connor doesn't really know.

He opens the wardrobe to find an abundance of blue, the kind of clothing options of someone who was trying to go under the radar; or maybe he was basing this too much on who this wardrobe most likely belongs to. Something catches his attention in the corner of his eye and when he looks he finds a easily recognizable boy in front of him, only the image moves when Connor does and he realizes there's a mirror attached to the back of the wardrobe's door.

Evan Hansen stares back at Connor, only he's a reflection, still, Connor's tiny gay heart was not ready so see Evan like this. His hair is everywhere, which is surprising for its length, and the clothes are old, baggy in some parts but there's a gap of skin visible that Connor has a specially hard time ignoring.

Connor's first thought is 'fuck he's adorable', his second thought is 'shit, this isn't a dream'. He comes to this realization because he was almost certain you couldn't see your reflection on dreams. He takes a moment to admire the way Evan looks, eyes going everywhere, trying to get as much information as possible because he doesn't think he'll have another chance to see Evan, not like this; then he proceeds to let himself worry about his situation.

While Connor was busy trying to make sense of what was going on, he missed the sound of the door opening.
"Honey, are you ok?"

Connor all but jumps out of his borrowed skin, turning around to find a small-ish blonde woman that's most likely Evan's mom, if the resemblance is anything to go by. She seems to irradiate exhaustion and comfort in spades, Connor swallows loudly.
"Evan?"

Connor opens and closes his mouth, tempted to play pretend for this woman, but her expression changes before he can, she smiles sheepishly.

"Oh, you're not my boy, are you?"

And Connor shakes his head no; he realizes, as she beams at him excitedly, exactly what's going on. Apparently, the universe has decided to push Evan into the mess that is Connor's entire existence, because he's Evan Hansen's soulmate.

"I ought to introduce myself; I'm Heidi Hansen, Evan's mom"

"I figured"

"You did?"

"You… look alike"
"Right, of course"
"I'm- I don't think I should- I know him, well not really, but I've seen him and, he's so… maybe it'd be better If I talked to him before telling you who I am?"

The woman, Mrs. Hansen? No, she doesn't have any wedding bands, probably Miss then; Heidi? Yeah, that was less of a hassle. Heidi beamed at him, lighting up like sky at night, and Connor didn't know how to feel about it because he hadn't meant for it to come out, it just… she had been staring at him with that exited expression, and Connor couldn't help but say it; that was a scary power she had going for her.

"I am curious, but I wouldn't want to overstep, this is between you two"
Fuck, she was amazing, and she would probably hate Connor if she met him outside of this particular context, which was a pity, because it wasn't often that Connor liked adults honestly.

The whole situation gets ruined when there's a loud growling noise coming from both of their stomachs, Connor blushes, Heidi chuckles.
"Breakfast it is, then"

Connor nods, still flustered, he doesn't generally make hungry noises, that or his stomach has gotten used to his eating habits; so he thinks he's understandably embarrassed.

Heidi leaves him so he can change, Connor grabs something he thinks Evan would wear and closes the closet, he'll try his best not to stare, he owes Evan that much. Once dressed he leaves the room; the house is small enough that he can't get lost, which is a good thing, considering.

Breakfast turns out to be cereal and some toast, Heidi apologizes saying that she's been too busy to go buy groceries, so this is what they have, Connor never complains.

"It must be an odd experience, being in someone else's body"

Connor nods as he shoves cereal into his mouth so he can't talk. Before Heidi can ask anything else, and Connor can tell she's weighting whether to do it or no, which, odd; there's someone ringing the bell.

Connor hurries his cereal so he can follow Heidi to the door, immensely curious. And if Connor thought waking up in Evan Hansen's body was weird, seeing himself outside of pictures or mirrors is definitely weirder.

Zoe and whoever is in Connor's body, probably Evan, don't have to say anything because Heidi turns back to Connor and seems to catch on what's happening; she lets the other two in and says something about late shifts and the number twenty. Connor turns to his soulmate, hopefully Evan, frowning.

"Why the fuck did you bring Zoe over?"

"Ok, that's definitely Connor"
Connor glares at her.

"I uh… I can't drive? I mean, I can, I have a license and everything, but I'm no good, and honestly it terrifies me, so I'm not sure how I got the license, and… I should shut up now"

Ok, that's definitely Evan Hansen, good. Evan turns to Zoe, something odd in his expression.
"Do you think you could... you know"
Connor blinks at him; he wasn't expecting that, he isn't the only one surprised by this turn of events.

"Are you sure?"

Connor feels the anger rising in his throat but Evan glances at him and then back at Zoe before smiling tentatively.

"It'll be fine"
Zoe sighs, but nods, before she leaves she throws a warning glare at Connor, who flips her off. Connor lets out a loud sigh and drops into the only couch in the living room.

"So"
There's a pause, where Evan looks everywhere but at him, when he does it seems to break whatever state he was just in.

"I'm sorry!"
Connor blinks once, twice, thrice, before asking.
"What are you apologizing for?"
"I just… we're in each other's bodies, and that means we're soulmates, and you must be so disappointed, and I'm sorry"
What?

Did Evan really just say that?

Was he actually implying that Connor was the unlucky one of the two?

"Hansen, are you serious?"
"Y-yes? Why would I- why would I not be?"

"You do know who I am, right?"
"Sort of?"

"If anyone should be disappointed here it should be you"

"That's not- not true! I- you're…"

"A psychopath, future school shooter, resident druggie, fag, the list goes on"
Evan curls on himself, which is a really weird sight when he's in Connor's body, actually the whole interaction is. He mutters something under his breath and Connor snaps.
"What was that?"

"At least people know you exist!"

Evan goes pale as soon as the words leave him, Connor stands up ready to bite back, but notices the way his soulmate takes a step back, and then collapses into the ground in a ball, saying the word 'sorry' like a broken label.
For the very first time in his life, Connor witnesses himself having a panic attack; he goes on autopilot, knowing his body better than anyone, approaching Evan carefully before pulling him to him. He doesn't get someone to comfort him, not really, but he still knows it'll work, can't explain how.

They stay like that for a while, when Evan finally goes back to breathing normally Connor pulls back somewhat; he doesn't completely pull apart because Evan's hands tighten around his back.

"I guess we're both messes"

Somehow, despite everything, that brings a laugh out of Evan, so he counts it as a win.

"Are you actually… any of that? I mean, sans the psychopath part, and the school shooter… you- I don't think you're that bad"

Connor chuckles.

"I am both gay and do pot"

"Oh, me too, kind of… I mean! I don't do drugs, not that there's anything wrong with you for doing them, but I- I uh… I'm bi!"

Connor decides to ignore the drug part, like he would've thought Evan did that sort of stuff.

"That's cool, I guess, makes this whole situation less of a pain"

Evan blushes, which is very noticeable now that he's in Connor's body; that still sends his mind reeling every time he concentrates on it.

"How long do you think it lasts?"

"It should- should last until tomorrow"

"Fuck"
"Sorry"

Connor laughs, he's not sure what exactly is so funny about it, but he doesn't give a fuck, much less when Evan eventually joins him. Soon they're both laughing on the floor, no longer holding each other.

Once he regains his breath, Evan stands up and helps Connor, the cast makes getting up on his own hard. Connor pulls them both to the couch.
"Come on Hansen, let's talk about anything else"

Evan smiles at him.
"Ok"