Mark sighed watching his daughter walk away to get ready for the show, he knew her she would tuck all of this away and sale this show for the fans and that worried him, he groaned standing up rubbing his face, he had told Jon not to do this to her.

"Don't do it deadman." Hunters voice came from behind him "Do what?" he asked turning around to face the younger man who just gave him a "do I look stupid?" look, Mark sighed "I just want to talk to him." Hunter nodded sitting down "And a couple things could happen, you and Jon get into it and that's going to upset her even further and shes going push you away again, or shes going to get upset over your getting into her business and again push you away, it'll just end badly for you deadman."

Mark sighed sitting back down rubbing his face "I just cant stand the thought of her falling apart again man-" he looked back up to the younger man who's face softened remembering how badly Lesnar hurt her "I don't think this is like that man, I spoke with Jon." Hunter admited to mark "what the fuck? But I cant?" Mark shook his head "I know, I know how that sounds." Hunter laughed "Rene came onto him, he pushed her off, told her to back off and stay away, he had plans of telling Sam when they got home this weekend, but Rene texted him about it and Sam seen it." Mark blew out a breath nodding.

I sat on a create they wanted to film something with the shield and myself, I rolled my eyes anger but they needed to get the ball rolling on this as wrestle mania was almost a week away.

I heard shuffling of feet and looked up there the three of them where decked out in their shield gear, Hunter said all I had to do was this and since all my other stuff was pre recorded I could head out.

My eyes connected with him I quickly looked away blowing out a breath "how long will this take?" I asked carnoe who rolled his eyes un aware of what was going on "ten minutes if you guys do it right." I nodded I already had my stuff against the wall ready to go.

"hey pretty lady." Dean Ambroses voice said above me causing me to look up, I nodded looking to the three shield members "can I help you fellas?'' Seth's eyes wondering over my body, I frowned looking back to Dean raising my eye brow.

"we just wanted to come and check on you, we seen what Brock Lesnar did to you last week." Dean spoke, I nodded shrugging "I've had worse." they all three laughed "well baby girl we just wanted to offer you our services."

"Yea see we don't like it when grown beast of men think its OK to put their hands on women, especially beautiful ones such as yourself." Seth interrupted Roman.

I nodded sliding off the created "Well Fella's like I said I've had worse." going to side step them I felt Dean grab my hand giving me butterflies stopping me dead in my tracks, I turned facing him our eyes intently on each other "Listen I'm sure you can handle yourself against lesnar, bit if you ever need a helping hand-" his eyes wondered up and down my body blatantly checking me out, I couldn't help but smirk at him as he put my hand to his lips kissing it "please let us know, is all we're saying pretty lady." he grabbed my bag from the ground handing it to me "I'll keep that in mind Ambrose, thank you."

"AND CUT Awesome job!" mark yelled out, I slowly pulled my hand away from Jon focusing on the rest of my bags, I sighed gripping the strap of my bag on my shoulder pulling my suit case behind me, I honeslty didn't even know if I had all my stuff I just hoped Jon would be kind enough to grab it for me, I rolled my eyes well he kissed another women he should be kind enough to grab any of my stuff "Sam." from behind me made me stop, think of devil.

I really didn't want to or have time to deal with this "Darlin." I frowned turning around "what?" I snapped glaring at the wall, I couldn't look at him right now "please look at me." he whispered, I wanted to look at him, I wanted to talk to him, I wanted him with me for this, but my pride and my ego I was dammed if I was going to repeat what I went through with Brock.

Looking down at the concrete floor I kicked at it with the tip of my well worn converse "Baby." he whispered sounding just as hurt as I felt, well he didn't really let me talk to him right away when he found out about Brock! Nope he freaked out and acted like a physcopath! "I didn't fucking kiss her!" he defended, I sucked the roof of my mouth nodding "that's good Jon, I gotta go." I fought back tears before turning around if I stayed any longer I would break, and I cant afford to break down here "SAM!" he yelled after me, I blew out a breath "Just keep walking."

"SAMANTHA! Talk to me!" he yelled as I rounded the corner, a loud ruckus causing me to bang making me imagine what ever he punched, kicked or threw "FUCK!" I heard him yell out

I blew out a breath heading straight to my grandparents, it was four in the morning and I knew everyone would be asleep, but I headed straight to the stalls covering my mouth "oh baby girl."i frowned seeing Ghost on the stall ground, looking up to the roof I shook my head "how much more am I expected to take? Is this some type of fucked up cruel test?" I sobbed before going into the stall.

"hey girl." I whispered sitting down beside my horse I ran my hand down her neck my eyes burning she tried getting up "shh girl, its OK, save your strength." I swallowed hard laying my head against hers "oh god, I cant do this." I cried before feeling someones arms around me "its OK sis." I heard my brothers voice as I cried "she's always been there for me Gun, when everything was terrible, Ghost was here." I pulled away wiping my eyes looking up to my brother.

"what are you doing here?" I asked him "Dad told me when you'd be in, figured you'd come here."

"I feel like I've failed her, there's gotta be something I could've done." I looked over at my house "you took better care of that horse then most people take care of people, this happens, shes old, shes lived a very good and fulfilled life." I sighed nodding "when are they going to do it?" I asked blowing out a breath.

Gunner sighed "Jake wants to do it ASAP, we where waiting for you." I nodded looking over at her "Can you call him and schedule for the morning?" I asked my voice cracking, Gunner nodded.

I blew out a breath standing up and walking to the office area grabbing a blanket and pillow that was store in there I walked back to Ghost's stall "What are you doing?" Gunner asked confused "I'm staying with my horse." laying down the pillow and blanket, Gunner sighed getting up and walking to the same room, I frowned watching him enter the room I just left with a blanket "what are you doing gunner?"

"staying with you." he sighed sitting down against the stall opposite side of me "you don't have to do that." He nodded leaning against the stall wall "i know but I've been there for everything else in your life, im going to be here for this." I frowned "Except for my baby." I whispered not even realizing that still hurt.

I looked up to my brother he nodded staying quiet as he pulled out his wallet "what are you doing?" I asked him confused as he silently handed me a folded paper "what is this?" clearing his throat he just nodded to it.

I frowned opening it, there was a picture of my brother dressed in the hospital gown holding my son outside of my room, I frowned looking at him "what is this? You weren't? How?" he blew out a breath as I handed it back to him "I wasn't going to miss that moment-" he cleared his throat "I sat out in the waiting, dad and I." I frowned "No one told me." I whispered "you made it clear you didn't want me there, and I couldn't blame you, the things I said comparing you to Jodi-" he shook his head "you would've been an amazing mother, that baby would've had so much love between you and Jon." my eyes burnt at the mention of Jon's name.

"Well you know everything happens for a reason." I shrugged needing to keep all of emotions in check, I didn't want to break, I needed to get through all of this "you know you don't have to do that with me right?" I looked to my brother feeling confused by his words "be strong, I know your used to after Brock, I know you don't want to break like that again, but its OK to let it go, you can with me." I blew a breath out shrugging looking down at my nails.

I bit on my bottom lip picking at the already chipped and worn out black nail polish "he was a beautiful baby huh?" I smiled looking at my brother who returned my grin nodding "he was." he whispered, I turned my head to the side shrugging "I could've held him forever you know? I had all these visions, teach him to ride ghost-" I felt the burn in my eyes as I tried with all my might to swallow the lump in my throat "he was always here you know?" I ran my hand down his neck and looked at my brother "Like when everything was falling apart including myself he was here, what am I going to do now?" I shook my head blowing out a breath "I just don't get it, I don't understand if this is life, and these are the chocie-" I turned my head letting out a sob "I just want Jon so bad."

"Shit." I heard before my brother moved to me as I sobbed he ran his hand over my head "shhh its OK runt." I shook my head pulling back my back hitting the stall wall using the back of my arm I wiped my face "I don't think it will be after all of this." I looked to gunner blowing out a breath "I think-" I swallowed the lump in my throat "I think Jon and I might be done."Gunner stared at me with a look of confusion on his face "What are you talking about?" I blew out a breath going into what had transpired in the last two days.

NO ONE'S POV-

Jon sat on Colby balcony, he fucked up he knew it, he took a swig of his beer "I think I could've kissed her all day man." He spoke quietly " I could've swept back those lose strands of hair out of her eyes and spent the day in bed with her just like that." He swallowed a swig of beer finishing the bottle reaching for his sixth one.

He opened it up taking another drink he didn't do with this emotional shit "maybe its because there's so much pain in her but man she kissed like she needed it, like she was aching for it and i fucked it up."

"its not to late man, Sam fucking loves you, so fix it." Colby encouraged hating that this was happening between his two friends again, these two where meant for each other everyone could see it apparently just not them, or for some reason the fucking universe that keeps throwing all this bullshit in there way.

Jon shook his head "naw man, she forgives a lot my anger, my bullshit insecurities, the shit I pulled with JJ, she probably could've forgiven this if I told her right away, but I didn't, I hid it in her eyes I lied to her, she cant forgive that." Jon groaned rubbing his face "man how do you know?" Colby asked

Before Jon could reply his phone went off with a number he had only dialed once, frowning he got up going inside to take this call "Yea." he answered preparing himself for an ass chewing "What the fuck is going on?" came Gunner Calaways voice, Jon groaned grabbing another beer sitting on the edge of the spare bed in Colby's room.

Jon's bag sitting on it, he couldn't go back to their room, though her stuff was gone her aroma was strongly there "what did she tell you?" knowing she didn't like telling her brother everything he didn't want to spill anything Gunner may not have known "that some skank bitch she's had concerns about for months now for some fucking reason thought it was OK to kiss you, shes fucking broken man, this fucking broke her! And I told you not to fucking do that!" Gunner yelled in a whisper telling Jon Sam was nearby.

Taking a long drink from his beer, he cleared his throat "I told Rene to back off, I told her to leave me alone, I hate Sam found out the way she did, I had every fucking intention of telling her when we got home that what happened today wouldn't happen." Jon defended himself "i didn't fucking kiss Rene."

"Then why the fuck aren't you here telling her this?" he hissed I let out a huff, now's the protective big brother? Where the fuck was this guy when she was holding our dying son "Mm." I cleared my throat at the thought of our son.

"Because last time I was near her she was threatening to make people bleed, the last time I was near her she couldn't even look at me! so I figure best thing to do with your sister when she gets like that is maybe just give her some fucking space." I snapped at her brother.

Who the fuck was he to lecture about anything regarding my relationship with her? "with everything else she has going on! She feels guilty getting mad at me, you wanna know why man? Because she looks at me she sees our fucking sons face! So im letting her get through this so she actually fucking feels it unlike everything else shes gone through!" and with that I hung up "FUCK!" throwing the bottle against the wall.

SAMS POV-

I groaned the next morning slowly sitting up from the concrete floor, my body cold and hurting but not as much as my heart was right now, I looked over at my horse who was awake but still laying down, running my hand down her side "i know honey, your not going to have any more pain after today-" I choked clearing my throat "Ah, your gonna be OK." I looked back over at my brother smiling, he stayed the entire night asleep in this horse pin with me "hey-" bending down slightly shaking his shoulder "Come one lets go get some coffee before this shit day starts." I muttered watching my brother stretch out groaning as he stood up "Jesus." shaking his head "getting fucking old." he muttered making me laugh "I think we both are brother." I groaned walking into my grandparents house.

I smiled small nodding at Michelle and my dad who was in the living room "Told you she slept in the barn." my dad spoke up first as I grabbed a cup of coffee, in my own world I fought the urge to text Jon, my anger was starting to sizzle and rationalization was hitting me, Jon wasn't a cheater, he deserved for me to listen to him, I just couldn't handle it.

I sat at the table enjoying the warmth of my coffee "wheres your fella?" my papa questioned, I frowned I didn't need them to know what was going on right now "work papa." I barely heard myself whisper "Awe I like it when Jon comes with you, his so much fun!" Kiriea smiled happily up from her action figures, I smiled "maybe next time kiddo." I promised though I wasn't sure if it was one I could keep.

"I'm sorry about your horse sissy, we can share nilla if you want." I smiled leaning over hugging my baby sister "your so sweet." I whispered kissing the top of her head "I love you."

"OK Sam, so whats going to happen is im going to inject her with this mixture and she'll just go to sleep."Jake our long time family vet and friend explained to me, my eyes already burning as I stared at the giant needle he would use to give my horse her finale moments, I just sat next to her head "she wont feel it? It wont hurt her?" looking up at him, the look of sympathy I'ive learned to know oh to well in my life looking back at me, I hated that look, I despised it!

"No Sam, she wont." he whispered I nodded laying over her hold her "I love you so much, take care of my JJ for me OK?" I kissed the top of her head before the flood gates opened and I let out a sob, feeling a pair of strong arms wrap them self around me as I cried, I cried for ghost, I cried for Jon, I cried for JJ but mostly I cried for myself, I didn't understand what had I don't so terribly wrong to deserve so much pain and hurt "shh baby girl." I heard my fathers voice as I wept into my horses neck.

Safe in my fathers arms I sobbed for every terrible thing that had ever happened to me that this horse had always gotten me unconditionally through "shh girl." I brushed my hand down her maine, she was gone, gently I placed a kiss on her head "you did good friend, I love you." I looked over at Jake "now what?" I questioned the next steps "I'll take her, would you like her cremated? We can do a lot with her raimans for you." he kindly offered, I rolled my eyes nodding, I was well aware of all my options.

Gripping tightly on my farther sleeves I didn't trust my legs not to give out on me right now as I felt my heart being torn out of my chest "I'd like her cremated, ashs in a urn and um my son, I have uh, we have a uh-" I struggled with my words "Jon and I we have a tree with our sons ashes, is there any way?" my voice finally giving out, I had no more left in me "we got this Sam." Jake nodded "Come on baby girl." my dad pulled me into him, I sighed laying my head against him letting him lead the way out of the barn, taking comfort in the protected feeling I had with my dad "you want to come back to my house?" he asked once we reached my house.

I sighed shaking my head "No, Thanks for the offer but no, I only have tonight home and Nana

s doing dinner, I just need some time, repack, something." I mumbled kicking the wood looking down "OK but if you need me, im right down the road, OK?" I felt like this was more then my horse, but just nodded not having the strength to question it "sure dad, thanks, I love you." I leaned up hugging him tightly feeling him hug me back just as tight "sure kid any time, I love you." I watched him walk off to his truck before heading inside.

Looking around my living room, it had his scent, his jacket across the back of my couch, some how he had just ended up moving in with me without even discussing it, I bit my lip walking to the room opening up drawers, grabbing a few pairs of clean boxers and socks for him, some t-shirts I didn't know if he needed it but I was sure he did. I laid down in the middle of my bed rubbing my face suddenly having no energy and feeling utterly exhausted before closing my eyes and turning the world to black, at least for the mean time.