A/N: This chapter has a lot of the things I wanted to get 'out there' and the next will do the same. Once they are complete, I will get back to the underworld merger and longer plot arc. As always, reviews are welcome.

The kitchen was a mess when Phoebe and Paige entered. Piper's clothes as well as a nightie and thong were on the floor, along with Leo's pajama pants, his underwear, a mask and blanket.

"I guess Piper pulled off her Picasso night" Paige said as she pointed to a paintbrush and tray covered in various spreadable edibles. "Way to go sister!"

"Wow! I think they broke this chair." Phoebe laughed "Good for them, but I am not cleaning any of this up…"

"Me either; l just hope they stayed off the counters and table...Oh gross, I just got a nasty picture in my mind… I am so tired."

"Tired, like you need sleep or tired of the Dean drama?"

"Both, really; but I'm not going to stress about Dean. I read the books and knew the type of man he was, I know how he's changed and how he hasn't. I had no intention of falling in love, certainly neither did he." Before Phoebe could say anything she added "I know- no one ever really plans to fall in love."

Phoebe gave her a strong hug and said "Paige, you don't have to be strong around me." She stepped back and said "You're mad... At Dean or yourself?"

"I'm mad at me for being hurt and I'm mad at him for being such a … a… coward. I can't believe I'm saying it, but he's a coward. He lets his fear rule him. I'm also mad because suddenly I have a lower self-image; I start thinking I'm not good enough and, well Pheebs, I'm great and he should be able to see that."

"You're right, you are great. And, Paige, he does see that. This has less to do with you than you think. Dean has lost everyone he's ever cared about – he's even lost Sam. He's afraid of losing you-"

"I know, Pheebs." Paige interrupted, sounding annoyed "He told me all that remember? I could die or get hurt and it would be too much… blah, blah, blah." She sighed "I just don't' see how he could be such a coward about his feelings – I don't mean about sharing them. I mean what he feels scares him."

"Paige, I know you understand loss; but losing someone, it's not the same for him. His dad raised him to believe that letting someone in is certain death for that person. He's 34; you are the first friend he's had in his entire life. He knows having him in your life doesn't put you in any more danger than we'd face anyway. He's worried that he couldn't live through another loss."

"I understand that he wouldn't want to get close to someone only to lose them… But there's no guarantee he would lose me and he'd rather just not try than risk the loss. That's when I start to think it's me. He took the risk with someone else, so it's me. I'm not worth it, to him."

"I think it's because it is you, that why it is so hard… The loss would be worse than any he's ever had."

"I guess that makes me feel a little better, but not much. I want him to feel I am worth the risk."

"You definitely are, and hopefully he will come to see that."

"Well, he's got two weeks to see it, or not. Then we'll have either our first date of many, or it'll be our first and last date."

Paige sighed and looked at her older sister "What about you and Sam? Why didn't you stay with him? He used his own, legitimate money to get a separate room tonight?"

"It was a very sweet thought, I wish he'd asked me first; I have to be at work by six a.m. and I just need to be rested for the meeting. Plus that would mean you had to be up and orbing me at crack-thirty."

Paige laughed "Well I would've done it, but you'd have owed me big time!" Then she paused. "Sam wasn't mad that you didn't even ask me?"

"No, he told me not to ask after he found out about the meeting. He said I should get as much rest as possible and that we shouldn't put you out like that;. Also, I think he was happy to not be in the same room as Dean, especially since he's gaining control of his powers."


Dean was flirting with someone across the honkytonk.

"Dean, Paige left less than ten minutes ago and you're hitting one of those girls over there? What the hell? I heard enough of what you said to Paige, or thought to her – why're you acting like this?"

"I just don't wanna be alone with my thoughts… And those two girls could erase all my thoughts."

"You're not alone. I'm here."

"You just wanna talk about feelings and that's not gonna help me, Samantha. You have your own room tonight – So I have the perfect opportunity to make myself numb..."

"You're a douchebag. I'm taking the car back. Call a cab or have one of them take you back, dick."

"Wow, man I'm sorry Phoebe didn't stay, but that's no reason you can't have some fun or at least not be such a bitch."

Sam walked out without calling him a jerk, and Dean knew he was seriously mad.


"Paige, Uhhh, Paige, Ohhh, Paige… Paige... Paige" Dean sighed and moaned.

"Dean? Are you OK?" Paige's voice shot through the motel room like a rocket. The room was totally dark. "I can't make out where you are." She said as she found a light switch.

The beds had been pushed together and there was a lot of commotion under all the covers. "Funny choice of words!" a little feminine voice said.

"Oh! I am so sorry!" Paige said "I thought you called for… me."

"Oh, No! Paige!" Dean jumped from the covers, pulling on his underwear as lunged at her. Two other faces appeared out from under the covers. Neither girl could be older than 22. One said "Is this this Paige that you love?" While at the same time the other one said "Awesome! But… Where did you come from?"

Paige chose to only acknowledge her. "I, Uh, have the adjoining room and thought I heard Dean call for me; I thought he was hurt or something." She seethed that last part and turned her gaze to him "Wishful thinking, I guess."

"Paige – I… I -." Paige just ignored him as she cut him off, looked at the girls and said "Sorry to interrupt. I'll be going now."

"NO!" They both shouted. "Don't go! Please!"

She cocked an eyebrow, "Well, I'm not going to join in your… this…" she said as she motioned to the bed.

One of the girls said "No we'll go! You came back and that must mean you love him too!" They climbed out of the bed, both totally nude. The other one chimed in "True love's so romantic!" They quickly got dressed, forgoing their undergarments. While Dean and Paige just stood there awkwardly, the two girls continued talking to each other with choruses of "She came back!" "It's sooo totally romantic!" "I hope I find true love someday."

Paige just stood there stunned. They didn't seem embarrassed in the least. When they were dressed (it only took about ninety seconds) they stopped and sighed at her and Dean, still muttering about true love and how lucky she is. One came over and gave Paige a hug – the kind you neither want nor expect, where your arms are pinned down to your sides. She whispered "His heart is yours, you know." The other one followed and squeezed her even harder "He loves you, really loves you!"

Dean opened the door and they each hugged him saying things like "Don't blow this again" and "She came back, she loves you!"

He closed the door behind them and sighed as he turned around and walked to where she was standing next to the table. He gave her his best smile and said "Awkward, huh?" with a little chuckle.

Paige gave Dean a look that made him ache inside, it looked like pure hate and loathing.

"There's nothing I can say…" He huffed as he sat down at the table and dropped his head into his hands.

"Look at me." Her voice was detached but demanding.

He looked up at her, waiting for her to yell or slap him or both.

"So, you wanted to hurt me so badly that you planned this?" her voice still unemotional.

"Why the fuck would you say… I didn't call you." He snapped, trying to start a fight by putting her on the defensive. "You just showed up! What the hell?"

"No, you called for me." Her voice was still calm and reserved. God, how he wished she'd yell like she had before.

"I could hear you, the entire time I got dressed and ready to come to your aid - you called 'Paige Oh, Paige'…" She stopped as reality sunk in. "You were calling my name during your sex-capades with the airhead sisters!"

Dean's head fell back into his hands as he groaned. "Yeeesss." he said into his hands. "I, they…Oh hell, here it is. After you and Phoebe left the bar, they started flirting and finally asked about you. I said I love you but it's so complicated. They ate up my sob story. I used my power to listen to their thought of feeling sorry for me and really laid it on thick. I gave them as much truth as I could, given the fact that I can't say anything about what I do or what you are… I told them I'm bad luck, people I love end up hurt, I travel a lot and it would be hard to leave you alone so much, I said I am too scared to commit. I said that's why you left me alone at the bar." He finally looked up at her. "It's all the truth, you know."

"So what?" Paige's voice was still that emotionless, even tone. "They offered to console you with sex? That only happens in porn."

Dean shrugged. "And to me, I guess. They felt sooo sorry for me; they wanted to make me feel better. They said I didn't need their names, I could just say yours. I guess saying your name over and over, that it…"

"Called me here to witness your group therapy?" Her eyes glared as her voice got louder and she pointed a finger in his face. "You wanted me to see this."

"I hurt you." It wasn't a question and he didn't apologize.

A smile crept across her lips and she began to laugh, tears streaming down her face. "Why're you laughing? This isn't funny!" Dean growled.

"Yes, Dean, it is." She stopped and sighed. "I am hurt, and I feel betrayed. But I have to remind myself, right now we're 'just friends', and all this…" She motioned to the disheveled room and the left-behind panties hanging on the lamp "This is your business, not mine."

She put her hand on his cheek. "Dean Winchester, you'll have to come up with a more sinister plan to get rid of me. I can take more emotional torture than this." She laughed again, the tears still falling and the hurt finally showing in her eyes.

He reached out and grabbed her around her waist, pulled her to him and buried his head in her stomach. "You are so special Paige. The most perfect woman I know. I love you."

She leaned down and kissed the top of his head "I know. Now just get some sleep." With that, she orbed away.

Dean just sat at the table. One tear trickled down his cheek. He had hurt her; he wanted to hurt her. He hated himself for it. He wanted to start a fight and for her tell him to fuck off. She didn't; she only raised her voice once and she laughed at his plan. She called it emotional torture, and she was right. But he didn't just torture her; in the end maybe he tortured himself even more... He sat at the table all night just thinking… Thinking about everything.

Paige went home and back to bed. She laughed at first, but cried herself to sleep.

If I could see before my time ends
The smile you gave me before the pain
I could accept the world of darkness
Never see the sun again...

Never ever gonna leave ya,
So dry your eyes and smile again
Say the words I need to hear...
Say you love me, say you love me
Say that you need me,
I can't take it anymore...

But I know I must be strong,
To keep belivin' in right or wrong...
I've got time but I can't wait too long
Wanna get you home where you belong...

Say you love me, say you love me
I can't take it anymore...
Say you love me, baby, baby, baby
Say you love me...
Say that you need me, I can't take it anymore...


At breakfast Dean told Sam about the night before. Sam scowled and listened. Dean told him about everything; how she laughed… Sam's eyebrows went up. "Really? She laughed?"

"Yeah, she laughed and cried. She realized I was calling her name while having sex with two other women and… She said we're just friends and it isn't her business."

"You are an asshole, piece of shit, douchebag, Dean." Sam said. "She should have slapped you - several times - yelled, called you names, told you to fuck off and said she'd never help either of us again."

"I know, and I'd have deserved it all."

"I can't believe you forgot calling her name would bring her to you..." Then Sam got a solemn look. "It wasn't an accident. You wanted her there - to run her off. Then you wouldn't have to make the decision about her because she wouldn't want you anymore..."

"Yeah, and she called me on it; that's really why she laughed." Dean sighed "Sammy, why did I-"

"Because that's who you are." Sam's empty coffee cup shattered as it met the table. He got up and paid the cashier, offering to pay for the mug, but she said it was OK. He went out and sat in the car; waiting for Dean. They were in their suits, ready to begin the investigation.

Dean got in the car "Sammy, I-"

"Don't. Don't explain yourself to me. It's who you are. Just think about the fact that Paige knows who you are; she knows you brought her here on purpose. She knows, and she still didn't tell you to go to Hell." Sam sighed. "Let's just work. You ready to start reading minds and get us some answers?"

"Hell yes, I'm ready."


Paige relayed her night to her sisters over coffee. They were shocked and stunned, especially when she told them how she reacted, and that she knows Dean wants to hurt her...

"Paige, why… How could you be OK with this?" Piper asked.

"It's not like I'm glad he did it; I just accept that he's trying to find a way to push me away so he won't have to look at his own emotions and feelings. Sam said it would be hard, and that he would hurt me. I think the next two weeks are going to be really tough in terms of what he does and says. I think even if he says he wants to try a relationship, he's going to try and push me away after that. But, I think we could have something great in the end; something easy, perfect, if we can just get through this emotional hurricane."

"At what cost to you?" Phoebe chimed in. "You have to consider this could make wounds that last forever. How can you have something easy when you have those pains reminding you about what a jerk he was?"

"I believe I can let it go, that he will help me. Time won't heal those scars. Dean will…"

"Well I hope that's true. And, I want you to get your 'happily-ever-after', I just don't like the path you're willing to take to get there." Phoebe said.

Piper gave a crooked grin. "Me too, Paige, I want you to be happy, but I don't have to be happy about you getting hurt in the process."

"Thanks for understanding and not nagging me about this."

"I'm doing my best not to nag…" Piper frowned. "Anyway, Phoebe had a premonition and we need to focus on that. I think I figured out where it will be."

"How?" Phobe asked.

"The place you described, the big Blue Moon billboard on a brick wall and the awning with the numbers 4154 on them… I searched for restaurants or bars with 4154 in their address. I got two possibilities and I know one; it's not brick and it doesn't have room for the billboard, so it has to be the other one. It's the Moonlight Café, a few blocks from Bernal Hills Park."

"That makes sense." Phoebe said "She leaves the restaurant and ends up getting attacked at a park a few blocks away."

"Do you know when?" Paige asked.

"The innocent was holding a paper with today's date on it. And there was a church bell chiming, but I'm not sure of the count… I heard at least nine bells and it was dark, so that would be tonight at nine or after." Phoebe said.

"OK, well, how about this, Paige takes you to the bar just before nine. When the innocent leaves, you call for Paige. She'll bring me, and we'll kick some butt."

"Do you know what we're up against?"

"No, I didn't see any black smoke or energy balls. She is grabbed and then I saw her dead on the ground; we could just be looking at a mugging, but I doubt it. I could sense a lot of evil. I don't even know how many attackers there are."

"We'll be ready with potions and salt guns. Maybe we could do another devils trap on the concrete like before…" Do you think you could find the exact spot in the park?"

"There was a water fountain, that's all I know, but she wasn't too far into the park. I have to go to work now, though, or Elise will kill me."

"You go, Piper can make some potions and I will go check out the park for the best strategy..." Paige said.


"I talked to various people downtown and now I see all the dead people." Sam groaned as he met back up with Dean. "They don't' respond to salt or iron and they are not engaging anyone, in any way. They can't be real ghosts."

"But people in this town know some of the ghosts they see." Dean said. "All these fake ghosts must have something in common?"

"They do. I discovered all the recognized ghosts were buried in the Gravel Hill Cemetery, the largest one in Pomeroy, so maybe someone put a hex on it?"

"Yeah, this feels like some kinda hoodoo, but I don't see the benefit. No one is terrified; there's no public panic and no one's been hurt by these ghosts." Dean gruffed. "One of the nurses at the hospital gave me a list of the first people who came in about seeing the ghosts. The first six spent a few days in the mental ward, until more and more people started seeing the ghosts too, then they went home and no one else was admitted. Sixth Sense-er number one is Jamie Ferguson, a soccer mom who lives on Maple Street."

"If she checked herself in, then she isn't the one doing the hoodoo, but that list is the best lead we have." Sam said. "Let's divide the list. You take the first three and I'll take the other three. Hey has your power been helpful?"

"Not really; I am getting better at honing in on someone's thoughts, but no one has lied to me so far, so I can't say it's been a help."

"Be careful. I don't know how I managed to go all Haley-Joel; but I don't think it's passed person to person."

"Yeah, I shook hands with at least ten people who see the ghosts while I was at the hospital."

"It must be an object… or one specific person, like patient zero."

"More like psychic zero." Dean laughed.

"Bad joke. Just meet me at the motel in three hours." As Sam got off the bench he and Dean were sitting on, he stumbled and tried to catch himself on a metal garbage can, but it came crashing to the ground next to him. Dean laughed and snorted "Smooth Sammy, rreeeaall smooth."

Sam blushed as he got up and put the can back. He noticed it had been bolted to the ground, but figured his two hundred-plus pounds were just more than the brackets could handle. "I'll meet up with you in three hours." He said as he walked away.


Paige walked from the Moonlight Café and took the most direct route to the park. Phoebe said the innocent was barely in the park when she was attacked but there was no water fountain. There was a park maintenance worker. Paige started coughing and asked about a water fountain. He said she should follow the path; it looped back toward the edge of the park and there was one there. She found the fountain; it was only about 150 feet inside the edge park, and it was a slight variation from the course she took from the restaurant.

'This has to be the place' Paige thought as she used her phone to snap some pics and send them to Phoebe. Phoebe confirmed that it looked like the same spot. Paige thought about the painting a devil's trap, but the maintenance guy was somewhere around and she didn't feel like getting a ticket for graffiti-ing up the park in broad daylight. She had a better idea to discuss with her sisters...

A/N: Hope you liked the first installment of 'asshole Dean'. Please, please give me a review or PM if you have a thought on any of this. I want to hear you, even if what you have to say is I suck (or worse). I'm on my knees here- figuratively. But if picturing me that way literally will make you write a review, then by all means…

The song is Say You Love Me by Deep Purple. In my imagination it is playing for both Dean as he sits in the dark and Paige as she cries herself to sleep.