A/N: Alas, I am indeed back. I have not given up on my stories nor my readers and I do hope that some of you remain to give me your feedback. I have been suffering with writers block so I beg you not to be too hard on me while I try to get back in the swing of things. Now as to those of you who were reading signs of darkness. Yes I did delete it, but it is coming back with a different twist. I felt I was following too close to the book, and after rereading Green Darkness by Anya Seton, I realized I would go in my own direction. I am having fun writing it and I hope you will enjoy reading it.
To my lovely beta. Thank you for sticking by me and being supportive. You always encourage me and you are an amazing friend. Your writing inspires me and I feel honored to be your beta as well.
Erik sighed, looking at Christine as images from his past flooded his mind. "The years I spent in India..and throughout the middle east were the worst years of my life. The things I saw...the things I participated in..." He said no more for a while but then told her about the many people he had killed for his own survival. How he would lay down at night and all he could see were their faces. He could tell at first that Christine was shocked by the things he told her and he feared that perhaps this would be what would end their relationship. "Christine, how can you feel so safe in the arms of a murder?" He asked, Christine arched a brow but said nothing for a moment. She looked at him for a moment before taking his hands in hers.
"These hands, these arms which have created beautiful music, have held me and touched me and have done so many other wonderful things may have killed in the past. But you did not kill for your own pleasure, and it haunts you still. Knowing that is what proves to me yet again what a wonderful man you are. You are not a bad person Erik, you are not a murder. You are a wonderful, intelligent and strong man who I love with all my heart and always will. I wish I could take away your past and replace the bad memories with beautiful ones. But I can't. All that I can do is be here for you and help you to try and accept your past and move past it." Christine kisses his palms and the tips of his fingers, looking into his eyes as she did so.
Erik blinked a few times, feeling overwhelmed with the emotions that were welling in chest at her words. "Christine-" He stopped for a moment, looking at the woman before him. She gazed at him, with love and devotion shining brightly in her eyes, and the way she tenderly held his hands in her own... the way she kissed each of his fingers. His heart melted in an instant and he wondered how he had ever managed to be lucky enough to gain her love. He wrapped his arms around her, his fingers winding into her hair as he pulled her against his strong body. He kissed her cheeks and forehead before pulling away. "How is it that you can be so accepting of me? How is that you can know who I am and still love me?" He asked, still utterly amazed by her.
"Erik, I will always love you regardless of what happens in the future. The past is in the past, it has made you the man you are now and the man I love. There is no question of my acceptance, it will always be there."
Erik felt as if an immense weight had been lifted now that he had told Christine everything from his past. A past that he hoped would one day finally stop haunting him. He had always feared completely opening up to Christine, afraid that once she knew the terrible things he had done she would no longer be able to look at with him love..but with fear and disgust. Yet here she was, telling him she loved him despite his past. He knew that with her love and her support that he could accept the things he could no longer change and finally be free of the chains of his past and hopefully create a happy, beautiful and promising future.
XXX
Christine took a deep breath before heading into the large bookstore where she had worked since she had moved to the city. She walked up to Marielle and smiled. "Marielle could I talk to you please?" Christine asked, feeling terrible for what she was about to do.
"Of course doll face, give me a minute to grab some coffee and I'll meet you in the office." Marielle gave Christine a bright smile before heading off and leaving Christine to walk into the office alone.
Christine sat down on a small plastic chair on the other side of a simple desk that had a computer on it. She didn't have to wait long until she heard Marielle's laugh on the other side of the door before it swung open. "Silly me, nearly spilled all the coffee onto the floor on my way here, had to go back for refills." She giggled and walked over to the other side of the desk before setting down a cup of coffee in front of Christine and taking a sip from her own cup. "Now what is it you wanted to talk about Miss up and coming star?" Christine saw Marielle's eyes twinkle and knew the other woman was truly happy for her, she was glad to have found a boss who treated her with respect and actually became a friend.
"I-I hate to say this but-"
"Oh don't be silly hon, I know exactly why you're here. Your schedule will of course be packed what with school, performing and a certain hunky man who I saw pick you up the other night." Christine blushed at these words but Marielle continued. "All I ask is that you not forget me sweetie, when you're famous one day I wanna hear you say 'and thank you to Marielle, a beautiful and single woman who I worked for and was completely amazing..' you know." Marielle chuckled before taking another sip of her coffee.
Christine smiled at her boss wanting to lean over the table and hug the other woman for her understanding. "Well you just about stole the words from my mouth. Though I can promise that if I make it to fame like you think I will, I will not forget to mention you." Christine grinned but Marielle looked very serious, something that was rare for the slightly older woman.
"You will make it Christine, I have no doubt about it. Look how far you've come already. It may not be a huge company, but it's still an amazing opportunity. You keep working at it and believing in yourself and I will see you accepting some award one of these days." Marielle smiled once more before reaching across the desk and lightly squeezing Christine's hand. Christine felt tears sting her eyes but blinked them away.
"You have no idea how much your words mean to me, I believe in myself and I have supportive friends but it's nice to hear that from someone else. My father-" Christine stopped herself, feeling her throat constrict as tears once more welled in her eyes. "Anyway, thank you for understand Marielle. I'll do my two weeks."
"No need dearie, I've already found someone to cover for you." Marielle stood up and Christine did the same.
"Thank you so much Marielle." Christine said before embracing her friend.
"Now you come back and visit, you and your hunk." Marielle grinned and Christine giggled as they headed out of the office together. Christine said goodbye to some of her fellow employees before stepping outside. A slightly cool breeze blew her hair back from her face as she walked down the busy New York City street. It was late September and in three weeks the opera would open. Christine had spent many night either at the theatre or at Erik's apartment working on the different pieces of music. They talked about what the words meant, the feelings behind them so that Christine could sing and convey that feeling to the audience. Erik was sure Christine would be fantastic, yet Christine was just waiting for something to go wrong.
She was about to cross the street when she began to feel like something wasn't quite right, she looked around at the many people all around expecting that one of them was giving her the evil eye yet they all seemed engrossed in their own actions. Yet she just couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching her. She sighed and walked across the street, her sense of unease began to become frustration as she realized this was not the first time that she felt someone was watching her. Whoever it was should stop playing games because they were quickly becoming old to Christine.
As Christine reached the other side of the street she felt like she could breathe again and quickly headed to a cafe. Taking a seat outside she rummaged through her purse before pulling out her cell phone. She quickly dialed Erik's number, nibbling her lip as she waited for him to pick up.
"Well hello mon amour." Was Erik's answer. Christine nearly purred at his voice, especially since he was speaking French.
"Well hello my gorgeous man. I was calling to see if you wanted to perhaps have some dinner tonight." Christine said, knowing that he could hear her smiling.
Erik chuckled softly before replying. "I would love nothing more."
XXX
Christine drummed her fingers against the kitchen counter as she flipped page after page of a rather large cook book hoping to find some ideas as to what to make for dinner. Up to this point in their relationship Erik had always been the one to cook or he had taken them out, or they had ordered in. Now Christine wanted to surprise him by cooking diner for them...The only problem was that while Christine had quite a few talents, cooking wasn't one of them. Sighing in frustration she slammed the book shut, alarming a sleeping Specter who immediately began barking. Running a hand through her mass of brown curls she leaned against the counter and prayed for some inspiration, when none came she randomly opened up the kitchen cabinets and pulled some things out, then grabbed some stuff from the fridge. Before she realized what she was doing she had some water boiling and was making a salad. She would do her best to make a satisfying dinner, and if that failed at least she had the rest down and ready to go.
She had showered once she came home, had dried her hair so it hung in loose curls around her face and shoulders. After putting on her makeup and spritzing herself with some perfume she slipped into a black dress which she knew flattered her, showing just enough leg, arm and of course the creamy skin of her back and the swell of her breasts. She had also taken the time to put some candles out to create a romantic atmosphere along with some soft jazzy music. Glancing at the time she saw that Erik would be there any minute which was perfect since the little meal she had put together was almost done.
When she heard a soft knock on her door she felt her heart skip a beat, something she knew would never stop as long as Erik was in her life. He never failed to bring a smile to her face, a blush to her cheeks or to send her heart racing. She took a deep breath hoping that her excitement wouldn't be too obvious when she opened the door, but as her hand closed around the door knob she could feel heat rise in her cheeks and butterflies flutter in her stomach. She quickly opened the door and instead of the happiness that she had expected to feel once she saw the man on the other side of the door, she felt only a sense of dread.
A/N: I know I'm terrible. But I had to end it there or this chapter would have been incredibly. Please tell me what you think, those of you who still remain!
