Chapter 29- Change Nothing or Ruin Everything

"ADDY COME BACK!" She heard Mary call.

Of course her stupid mouth had to tell Mary the one thing she had sworn she would tell no one.

"ADDY! PLEASE... COME... BACK!" Mary called out of breath from trying to chase her down.

Adelaide kept running.

She ran and ran until she reached the hidden room behind a painting of some wizards having a birthday party. She quickly muttered the password 'let them eat cake' and slipped into the room.

Meanwhile, Mary, who had lost sight of her friend, was hustling back to the great hall. She made her way to the boys... alone... and was met by confused looks, and eyes peering around her to spot their fellow marauder.

"Where's Addy?" James asked.

"Um... she kind of... ran off..."

"Ran off?" Remus questioned.

"Is she okay? What happened?!" Sirius asked.

"Um. I think she's okay..uh..." Mary had to think fast. Only the boys would know what random place in the castle she would be holed up in, but she had to be careful about who she asked to help.

Sirius was out of the question. Peter was too clueless to be of any help. James might be okay, but Remus was always a very calming presence from what she had seen. When Mary was hysterical after Adelaide first got sick, Remus was the one who helped her stop freaking out and blaming herself. It was ironic really.

"Um.. Remus. Could you please help me find her?"

Remus looked surprised. "Me? Why not Sirius?"

Sirius looked confused. "Yeah, why not Sirius?" He asked.

"Ugh! Remus please just come help me!" She said quickly.

Remus looked hesitant, but eventually agreed to go with her.

Sirius was not happy about Remus going instead, but Adelaide had just vented about how much she hated him trying to protect her, so he thought it might be better to let her be for now.

"Oh we should grab her some food..." Mary said making her a plate, stealing some mashed potatoes off of James's plate.

"Hey! I was eating those!" James said, trying and failing to scoot his plate out of reach.

Once the two were out of the great hall, Remus asked, "Mary, what's all this about?"

Mary sighed loudly, running her hands over her face. "I don't think I can tell you. I don't think she even meant to tell me!" She exclaimed. She obviously had always thought Sirius had a thing for Adelaide, but never realized it could be reciprocated... although it could be someone else whose name started with an 'S'...

"Hmmm... and you said she ran this way?" He said pointing toward a corridor on the third floor. Mary nodded. "I think I know where she went... how about you head back, I'll talk to her."

"Okay... well don't forget the food." She said hesitantly, handing him the dinner plate.

Remus took the plate and made his way toward the painting of the wizards having a birthday party and mumbled the password. He walked in the hidden room to see Adelaide sitting on the floor against the wall with her arms around her knees, quietly pouting.

"Hey Ads... I heard you had quite the work out running up here.." he chuckled sitting beside her. He handed her the plate. "Mary said you'd be hungry..."

Adelaide briefly suspended her pouting to greedily inhale the food. "Thanks Moony." She muttered with her mouth full. She turned to see him looking quite pale and tired, she knew it was getting close to the full moon... and the start of the mandrake month. "Rem.. you don't look so good... you should really go to bed early.."

"I'm fine." He said dismissively with a smile. "Addy. Are you going to tell me what happened?"

"Not if I can help it."

"Is it about Mary?"

"No."

"Is it about what you and Sirius talked about?"

She hesitated. "No." She said quietly. He wasn't fully convinced.

"Hmm... well I saw you talk with Rosier... is it about him?"

"No! It's not about Evan! Seriously? What is it with everyone thinking I like him!?" She said brandishing her mashed potato fork, still speaking with her mouth full. It was definitely not the response he was expecting.

"I never said you liked him!" Remus chuckled, wiping off some mashed potatoes that had been flung onto his shirt. "Ads. I think you'll feel better if you just tell me. You know I can keep a secret."

Adelaide knew he was right. She would most certainly feel better and he definitely could keep a secret, but would it help the situation if he knew the truth? That wasn't clear. So, she just decided not to say anything until she had finished her dinner. Once, she had eaten the last morsel of potatoes from her plate, exhausting all her means of stalling, she placed the plate on the floor beside her and then put her face in her hands.

"I can't tell you. I can't tell anyone." She said in a calm and quiet voice.

"Why not? What's the worst that could happen?"

She looked up with a very serious face. "Best case. It would change nothing. Worse case. It would ruin everything."

Remus was at a loss for what could possibly 'ruin everything'. Obviously his comment about Evan had struck a cord, but why? And why did she leap to conclusions about her fancying him?

He looked at her, trying to read her, but her face was blank. She did this when she was trying to hide her emotions, always had. He was usually pretty good about reading people, but she was nearly impossible when she was closed off like this. Sirius was the only one who could figure her out. Why didn't Mary just get Sirius? Surely he would be more help. Why Remus?

Mary said that Adelaide told her something she didn't mean to tell her... It had to be about Sirius.

Something about Sirius that would change nothing or ruin everything...

Then it hit him all at once.

Adelaide asked Sirius if he would fly her over a puddle, and somehow changed the subject every-time it was brought up, especially when Remus tried pointing out that it's what James offered to do for Lily, whom he most certainly fancied.

She blew up when he even mentioned Evan, saying she didn't fancy him. Maybe she fancied someone else. Maybe she fancied Sirius.

"Addy, do you fancy Siri—" Remus didn't finish his sentence on account of Adelaide sitting up and putting her hands over his mouth.

"SHH SH SHH SHHHHH! DON'T YOU DARE FINSIH THAT SENTENCE REMUS JOHN!" She said loudly with wild eyes.

Remus laughed at his usually pretty calm friend totally losing her composure. She let him go, realizing how crazy she looked.

Yep. He was sure she fancied him. Not only that, but she was terrified. Too terrified to even let him say it out loud.

"Addy. I think I know why you're upset."

"What?"

"I don't know how I didn't see it sooner... you like him don't you? Pad—"

"SHHHHHUUUSSHHHH!!"

She put her hands over the werewolf's mouth once again. Remus merely gave her a 'really?' kind of look.

"Sorry." She mumbled, letting him go and scooting over to reduce her temptation to assault him again.

Of course she was terrified. She was literally having her marriage arranged, and admitting her feelings wouldn't change this fact. He was her best friend, and she was his. Something like this could ruin everything between them. It made perfect sense to him why she would want to pretend she didn't feel anything beyond platonic friendship for Sirius.

"Addy. I get it. I get why you don't want anyone to know and I promise I won't tell a soul."

"You know, I am very tempted to obliviate you and Mary right now."

"You know, I have no doubt that if you managed a spell as advanced as that, Sirius would throw you a parade." Remus smirked. He knew he probably shouldn't have said it, but it was oh so very true.

Adelaide blushed. "Stop it."

"You can't help who you like Addy... just like Sirius can't help how much he likes you."

"OUT! OUT! YOU'VE BEEN KICKED OUT REMUS JOHN LUPIN!"

Remus laughed loudly. She was so strange. Either she was eerily calm and emotionless or she was screaming in his face. He found it hilarious. "Addy! You can't kick me out! This is my hiding spot too!"

"NOT ANYMORE. YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE. OUT!" She said dramatically, pointing to the door.

Remus merely rolled his eyes. "What do you want me to tell the others?"

"Just tell them I started my period or something. That should keep them away." She mumbled.

Remus blushed slightly. "If I say that, Sirius will freak out trying to give you chocolate and hot water bottles. There's also a good chance he would drag you to see Poppy against your will."

He had a point.

"Uggghhh!! That stupid mutt is too nice! IT'S INFURIATING!"

"He's only that nice because he lik—"

"OUT! WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?"

"I'm leaving! Okay! I'm leaving! But you should at least talk to Mary about it."

"No."

"But—"

"No."

Remus took a deep breath. He knew she was shutting everyone out in order to protect herself, he did the same thing.

"Addy I know that you think that you can ignore this and pretend it isn't a thing. But, if you build up all these emotional walls for too long, one day you'll be stuck living in a prison of your own making. Don't say I didn't warn you." He said, leaving Adelaide alone to marinade over her stupid feelings.

Adelaide stayed hidden in the room late into the night. She was restless and in need of something to do that would keep her from feeling totally out of control and to stop herself from dwelling on the fact that Remus knew her secret. So, she charmed some interesting pictures upon the tapestried walls and repaired some of the broken furniture laying about. She was in the midst of fixing one of the squashy loveseats when she heard someone enter the room. Her stomach was a bundle of nerves, and she prayed it wouldn't be who she thought it was. It wasn't.

"I like what you've done with the place, Ads!" Said a messy haired boy, pushing up his crooked glasses as he looked around at his best friend's handiwork.

"Thanks prongsy.." she muttered, going back to work on the loveseat.

"Addy, are you okay? You know what. That was a stupid question. Of course you're not." He said shaking his head. "If you were okay, you wouldn't be hiding in here.." He sat down on the large purple love seat she had already fixed and patted the seat beside him for her to sit with him. She was reluctant, but she did join him.

"Ads. You know I love you right? You're like my little sister..."

"Little?!" Adelaide exclaimed, offended.

James chuckled. "Well you are the youngest... and the shortest..."

"You all are just freakishly tall." She grumbled crossing her arms over her chest.

"Addy. You're my best friend. If there's something you need to talk about, I'm here." He said putting an arm around her as she rested her head on his shoulder. Adelaide always liked the nurturing side of James.

"James... you fancy Lily, don't you."

James's face turned a little pink. He hadn't actually admitted this fact to anyone, though it was obvious to everyone. "Yes." He answered softly. Why was she asking this? "Why?"

"I... I'll tell you why I ran away from Mary... but you have to promise not to say anything... you have to solemnly swear it." She said moving her head from his shoulder to look at him.

"Addy. I solemnly swear I will not tell a soul." He said putting his hand to his heart.

James watched as Adelaide scrunched up her little nose making that face she made when she was thinking very hard about what she was going to say. "I accidentally told Mary that I fancied someone."

James blinked. "Who?"

Adelaide gulped. Her breath quickened and she shut her eyes tightly. "I can't." She said shaking her head.

"Is it Evan?"

"NO! Merlin I'm so sick of everyone assuming that it's him." She said exasperatedly.

"Okay, okay! It's not Evan! Are you going to tell me who it is?"

"No."

"Is it Regu-"

"No."

"Is it S—"

"Please stop. I'm not telling you." She said calmly... only Sirius would have been able to see the panic brewing within her eyes.

"Okay. Well will you at least come back to the dorm?"

Adelaide ran her hands through her platinum blonde hair. "If I go back, Mary will ask a bunch of questions and/ or tease me."

"Well then just cast a silencing charm on her! Problem solved!" James said winking and bumping shoulders with his best friend. She knew he was kidding, but it was a legitimate solution.

"That is truly an excellent idea, Prongsy." She said smiling slightly up at him.

And with that, the two curfew breaking, mashed potato loving Gryffindors, climbed up the stairs under the invisibility cloak to the dormitories.