Chapter 29

"Brandon, let's go to the waiting room to see if Mom is there." Lena all but whispered as she finally found the strength to speak.

"I…I can't. Callie." He choked out as he lifted his head from his heads. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy, his cheeks were soaked as tears continued to roll down them.

"She's in surgery, she's in good hands. Sitting on the floor isn't going to change anything. You'll be more comfortable in a chair." Lena's voice was strained as she tried to hold her tears back. She needed to be strong for him. She held out her hand. "Callie is strong. She's a fighter."

He hesitated before taking Lena's hand and planting his feet on the ground. She rested her hand on his back and rubbed it soothingly as they started down the hall. When they arrived in the waiting room, Lena spotted her wife becoming agitated with the woman at the front desk. The blonde lifted her head at the approaching footsteps and practically stumbled towards Lena and Brandon. Her stomach plummeted when she saw their distraught faces and her son crying. "What's going on? What happened? Where's Callie?"

Lena glanced at Jesus, Mariana, and Jude who looked at Brandon and Lena anxiously. She patted Brandon on the back. "B, why don't you take a seat?"

Brandon threw himself into one of the chairs, staring ahead as silent tears streamed down his face. His mind was jumbled; he struggled to process the events of the past hour. He needed Callie to be okay. He needed her to make it out of this alive.

"Lena." Stef swallowed thickly.

"Callie's in surgery." Lena began, struggling to keep her voice even. She couldn't fall apart in front of her children. "The placenta abrupted and she went into labor. She…she went into shock from hemorrhaging."

Stef felt a lump developing in her throat. She knew the dangers of women hemorrhaging during childbirth "And the baby?"

Everyone glanced at Brandon as he choked out a sob. The image of a lifeless Melody in Callie's trembling arms floated behind his lids. Lena felt more tears spring to her eyes as she slowly shook her head. "She…uh lost the baby."

Stef closed her eyes. Mariana reached for Jude's hand, both of them crying. Jesus stared ahead distantly.

"Is she going to be okay?" Jude asked through tears.

Lena and Stef exchanged glances. Stef knew her wife wasn't saying everything she knew, and her fear tripled when Lena hesitated. "We don't know much right now. She's in surgery. But Callie's strong. I'm sure she will pull through."

Fear swam in the pit of all their stomachs. Jude shook his head in disbelief. Callie had been the only family he had for seven years. She protected him from the horrors of foster care as best as she could. She took beatings for him, sacrificed her own needs for his, practically raised him. He wouldn't be okay without her. "It's not fair. It's not fair that she has to keep fighting like this. That these bad things keep happening to her."

"I know, bud." Stef frowned because there was nothing else to say. She met Lena's uneasy eyes before looking to her children all sitting side by side with matching expressions of sadness and worry. "I'm going to grab a cup of coffee with Mama. You guys stay here and stay positive okay?"

Jude nodded and watched his mothers take off down the hall, wondering if there was information being left out. u

"What aren't you telling the kids? What's going on?" Stef asked when they were far enough away from the kids.

"It's bad, Stef." Lena's voice cracked as her eyes glistened with tears. "There was so much blood and when she got here she was already fully dilated, and the baby dropped so they had no choice but to deliver vaginally and then they couldn't find the baby's heartbeat. They couldn't find her heartbeat and Callie still had to deliver her. And then she was holding her and she fell unconscious and then Callie's heart stopped. It stopped, Stef. And they mentioned a hysterectomy."

Stef let the tears roll down her cheeks now that she was away from the kids. She pulled Lena into her arms and the two latched onto each other as if they were each other's lifeline. "We'll get through this. We always do."

Lena pulled out of her wife's arms, wiping at her dampened cheeks as she shook her head. "I don't know if Callie can. Worse and worse things just keeping happening to her, Stef. This one is bad. Really bad. And that's if she even comes out of this alive."

Stef watched her wife break down into tears once again. She pulled her back into her arms, tracing circles on her back. "They haven't given us an update yet, so she must be in surgery, which means they started her heart again."

"We should head back to the kids. They shouldn't be alone right now. Especially Brandon. He's a mess right now."

Stef nodded in agreement. She quickly filled up a cup of coffee so the kids wouldn't be suspicious about why they left. Plus, it was undoubtfully going to be a long night. They returned to the waiting room and sat with their children, attempting to comfort them. Brandon alternating between pacing the room and sitting restlessly in the chair. Time seemed to be on a standstill as they all anxiously awaited news on Callie.

Stef and Lena jumped up when they finally saw one of the nurses. Brandon remained in his seat but grasped onto the armrests of his chair tightly, bracing himself. "Please tell me she is alive."

"They're finishing up surgery, but Callie is in stable condition. As you know, Callie suffered from placental abruption, which led to many other complications. She fell into shock from the blood loss. For temporary measures to stabilize her, we placed a balloon in her aorta and uterus to temporarily minimize the bleeding. We had to perform an exploratory laparotomy, where we ended up removing remaining pieces of the placenta. She also had vaginal and cervical tears. In order to prevent a hysterectomy, Dr. Williams took multiple measures to stop the bleeding using a combination of stitching up the lacerations, as well as stitching the uterus, ligating arteries, and embolizing blood vessels."

Brandon let out a sigh of relief. She pulled through; she was alive, she was stable. But his stomach remained in knots. He needed to see her alive and breathing with his own eyes.

"Where do we go from here? Are there other complications from this? Will she be able to conceive in the future?" Stef asked, her mind swirling at the information.

"Dr. Williams can go over her recovery plan and discuss the surgery and its outcomes in more detail. I can tell you that she's going to be in a lot of pain when she wakes up and there could be fertility difficulties or there may be none. It's hard to say, but it's not a definite no chance of pregnancy like a hysterectomy."

"Okay, thank you." Stef forced a smile at the nurse before the woman took off down the hall. She turned to face her kids, letting out a breath. "She's okay. She's going to be okay."

Brandon wanted to scream. She was alive and stable, but she was not okay. Nothing about this was okay. She nearly died, she had to deliver her lifeless daughter, and now she could face fertility issues in the future. This was anything but okay and Brandon wasn't sure if it ever would be.


Brandon opened the door slowly. His eyes were bloodshot, and his cheeks were puffy. His heart broke when he saw Callie lying in the bed unconsciously. He watched the gentle rise and fall of her chest, the steady lines on the heart monitor, the subtle twitch in her eyes. They were all signs she was alive. He strolled towards the chair in the corner of the room and pulled it against her bed. Taking a seat, he gently took her hand in his. He brought it to his lips, leaving a soft kiss on the top of her hand. His eyes studied her face. Every line, every curve, every indent. He sat up straighter when he saw her eyes flutter open.

She blinked several times, adjusting to the light. Eventually, her eyes focused on him. Confusion swam in her eyes and then suddenly everything crashed into her. "Brandon."

Her voice came out as nothing more than a husky whisper. Brandon stood to press a ginger kiss to her forehead. "Hey, I'm here."

"Melody." She choked out, her lower lip trembling.

"I know. I know." Brandon murmured. He didn't know what to say to her. There were no words to make this better. "You scared us. We didn't know if you were going to be okay for a little while. Your heart stopped."

Callie couldn't help but think that it wouldn't have been a bad thing if she didn't make it. Life wasn't worth it anymore, but she couldn't do that to Brandon, to her family. Especially Jude who had been through enough in his thirteen years.

"Are you in a lot of pain? Do you need me to get the doctor?"

The pain was bad. Her abdomen and lower half felt like they had been ripped open and her insides sliced apart. In a way they were. The pain was similar to the pain she experienced in the hospital after the night of the winter ball. It was another awful reminder of that night. But she didn't want doctors examining her. So she shook her head, even though she was well aware that Brandon could read right through her.

"Someone came to speak with us. They said that you can see her again if you want. There's this company that takes photos. You can dress her and spend some time with her. Mariana ran home to get some of the outfits we bought if you do." Brandon's voice cracked on the last part as he thought back to them wandering baby stores, smiling and laughing as they picked out baby clothes. "It's completely up to you."

Callie looked at him with tears rimmed in her eyes. "I…I want to. I need to see her again."

Brandon nodded. He knew she only had a short time with the baby before she lost consciousness. "Okay. I'll let them know."

"Will you stay?" Callie croaked timidly.

Brandon took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. He was slightly relieved. He too wanted to say goodbye but would not have gone against Callie's wishes if she wanted to be alone. "Of course. If you want me there then I'll be there."


The nurse entered the room, wheeling in a cot. She pushed it to Callie's bedside and smiled sadly at the young couple. "I'll leave you two alone."

Tears stung Brandon's eyes as he looked down at the still baby in the cot. He still couldn't wrap his mind around the events of the past few hours. He glanced at Callie who peered into the cot, her eyes glistening with unshed tears and her face painted with anguish. "Do you want to hold her?"

She nodded, her face scrunching together slightly in an attempt to hold back the tears. Brandon slowly reached into the cot, sliding his hands beneath the baby. He moved meticulously to lift the baby into his arms. He felt as though she would break with any sudden movements. A twinge shot through his heart. He lifted the baby to his chest and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head before he passed her to Callie.

A sob ripped through Callie's throat as she cuddled her daughter in her arms. She had dreamed of this moment, looked forward to it; the moment that she held her daughter. But it wasn't supposed to be like this. She wasn't supposed to feel so hopeless and broken. She wasn't supposed to be holding a lifeless child. She stared down at the little girl, studying every feature, engraving every detail in her memory. "She's so beautiful. So perfect."

Brandon closed his eyes for a moment as he felt hot tears ooze from them. He leaned over Callie's bed, nuzzling his nose in her soft curls and kissing her head. "She is. She's so perfect."

Callie lifted the baby slightly to kiss her forehead. "I love you, my sweet Melody. I love you so, so much and that will never change."

Brandon planted another kiss to Callie's hair. She peeled her eyes off Melody to glance at Brandon before she scooted over in her bed to make room for him. A wince fell across her face as her lower half screamed in pain at the movement. Brandon slid onto the bed beside her, wrapping an arm around her. His eyes traveled to Melody's face, trying to memorize every feature. "She looks like you."

Callie leaned into Brandon. "I don't want to let her go."

"I know. Me either." Brandon whispered, reaching up to gently stroke Callie's hair. "Do you want to dress her?"

Callie nodded as she ran her thumb over Melody's smooth cheek. "M-maybe one of the jumpsuits. So, she looks comfortable. Like she's sleeping."

Brandon planted his feet on the ground and grabbed the shopping bag off the counter. He reached inside and pulled out a fleece, polka dot footie jumpsuit with a butterfly in the middle. He held up the article of clothing to show Callie. "How about this?"

Callie blinked back more tears as she nodded her head. When she bought that jumpsuit, she had imagined dressing Melody in it before bed. Never once did it cross her mind that she would be dressing her in it to be memorialized. "That one is perfect."

Brandon watched as Callie pushed the blanket off her body and swung her legs over the side of the bed. Her movements were stiff and slow as she stood. He didn't fail to notice the pain that crossed over her face. "Are you supposed to be up and walking?"

Callie kissed Melody's head before sliding her into the cot. She took the piece of clothing from Brandon. "I don't care about what I'm supposed to or not supposed to do right now. I have limited time with her. She's all that matters right now."

Brandon only nodded. He was concerned for Callie's health, she had gotten out of surgery less than two hours ago. But he completely understood and knew arguing would be a waste. He watched Callie's tender hands unwrap the blanket wrapped around Melody. His heart shattered for the millionth time that day. Callie seemed so natural with the baby; her maternal instincts making a strong appearance. He couldn't understand why this was happening. He reached into his pocket to pull out his phone. "Can I take some pictures?"

Callie nodded as she continued to dress the baby. She picked her back up, cradling her to her chest. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment as more tears erupted from her eyes. She inhaled deeply as she started back towards the bed. Brandon made his way over to her and helped her back into the bed. He joined her, both of their eyes focused on the little girl in Callie's arms. The same thoughts swirled in both their minds. All the dreams, all the hopes, all the plans they had made were suddenly gone.

The two spent the next couple of hours holding the little girl; treasuring their limited time with her. The professional photographer made a visit and spent time taking photos of Melody and Callie and Brandon with Melody. Callie wasn't sure if she could handle looking at these photos any time soon, but she knew she would cherish them in the future.

The nurse returned to take Melody away. Tears streamed down Callie's face and she brought the little girl's head to her lips, leaving a soft kiss on her skin. "Goodbye, my sweet girl. I love you so, so much."

Brandon swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched his girlfriend say goodbye to the baby. They weren't supposed to be saying goodbye. They were supposed to be cooing over her, celebrating the new life. Callie passed Melody to Brandon, choking out a sob as she did so. Brandon also kissed the top of her head, inhaling the baby's sweet scent. "I love you, Melody."

Callie's body shook with sobs as she watched the nurse leave with her daughter. She was gone. Her heart physically ached with pain from the loss of her daughter. Callie would never free her mind from the lifeless body that she held for only a short time. It wasn't supposed to end this way. She was supposed to hold her until she was too big to be held. She wanted to rock her to sleep at night, hold her while she ate, cradle her as she cried.

She knew she loved her daughter from the minute she found out she was pregnant. She didn't want to be pregnant, not at sixteen and not with a monster's child, but she loved her. She was half of her after all and she believed Lena and Stef's words- DNA doesn't make a family, love does. She would have done everything to protect her child while she was pregnant, but now that she was gone she really understood just how much she loved her. She felt empty, like a piece of her heart had shattered and she was left with a gaping hole.

Brandon pulled her into his arms. She buried her head in his chest, soaking his shirt with her tears. "I failed. I failed at protecting her."

"You did not fail, Callie. This was not your fault in any way." Brandon lifted her chin up to look into her broken eyes. His heart was not only broken that Melody was gone, but that he had to watch Callie suffer through this.

An endless stream of tears tumbled down her cheeks. "I'm her mother, Brandon. I should have known something was wrong. She…she was suffering in my belly. The place she is supposed to be safe. I was having cramps all day. I thought they were Braxton hicks, but I should have known. I should have known something was wrong."

"You can't blame yourself, Callie." Brandon frowned. He paused for a moment, searching for the words to tell her what the doctors had told them earlier. "They um…they think it was caused by a fall."

It took Callie a moment to process Brandon's words. A fall. The only time she had fallen when she was pregnant was when Vico pushed her. Nausea tumbled in her stomach. "But…but they checked me after that. They said…they said everything was fine."

"They think the tear in the placenta was small at that time that it went undetected and then it gradually tore more."

She clenched her teeth as she shook her head angrily. "No. No!"

"Callie…" Brandon whispered.

"I can't take them ruining my life anymore! They took everything else from me, why did they have to take my baby?" Her lower lip trembled and she wondered how her body could produce this many tears. More guilt swam in her stomach as she thought back to that day. She had fought Vico, she had talked back to him. She should have just let him do what he wanted to do and wouldn't have pushed her.

Brandon's lips landed on her forehead as he pulled her closer. He didn't know how to comfort her because there was nothing he could say or do that would make this better. "It's not fair. Nothing about this is fair, but they'll pay for everything. I promise. I'll make sure of it if it's the last thing I do."

"There is nothing that would pay for this." Her voice sounded so broken.

The door clicked open. Stef and Lena entered, wearing matching somber expressions. They frowned when they met Callie and Brandon's eyes, both holding so much pain and exhaustion. They had anxiously waited to see the brunette. They all knew she wanted and needed Brandon, and so they let him be there when she woke up and they wanted to provide the young couple privacy while they said goodbye to Melody.

Stef walked towards Callie's bed and placed a hand on her leg. "Oh, my love, I'm so sorry."

The blonde's words caused a new batch of tears to leak from Callie's eyes. She leaned forward, collapsing against the arms that wrapped around her. Stef stroked her back soothingly as Callie cried into her shoulder. Brandon remained in the bed beside Callie, watching as she sobbed in his mother's arms. The helpless Bandon was experiencing was unbearable. It was an awful feeling to watch the person you love the most suffer tremendously. There was nothing he could do to make this better and that killed him.

"I'm so sorry, my sweet girl. We're here for you." Stef held the sobbing brunette tightly. Her own tears trickled down her cheeks. Watching Callie suffering was becoming too often of an occurrence. This, however, was a whole other level of suffering. Stef couldn't even begin to imagine the hurt Callie was experiencing. "I know this isn't easy to think about, but a social worker is going to come to speak to you soon. She's going to talk to you about your memorial options. If you want to do a funeral or cremation or something else."

Callie pulled out of Stef's arms and inhaled sharply. The thought of burying or cremating her daughter made it all too real. It made it permanent. Once that happened, she would never see Melody again, never hold her. She looked at Brandon with panic. "I don't…I don't know what…I can't…"

Brandon sat up straight and place a hand on her back. "Hey, it's okay. Take a deep breath. You don't have to make a decision right this minute. I'm sure the social worker will explain all your options and you can think about it. But whatever you want to do is fine."

Callie shut her eyes. This was all too much. She just wanted one second, one second to forget, to pretend that Melody was still here, healthy.

Thanks for reading! I got a review last chapter that wished there had been a trigger warning on the chapter. I apologize if the last chapter was triggering to anyone. I also want to note that when I write about the characters feelings, this is just the emotions they are experiencing. Callie feeling like a failure does not mean that she is a failure, it just her emotions. I do a lot of research when writing, especially for the last couple and few upcoming chapters in order to try and capture the raw emotions.

Anyway, thanks again for reading! Callie will return home next chapter.

Review!