The fire licks away at the venison an' the smell of meat lingers 'round us. I'm glad we were able to bring back food to our family. Everybody sits 'round the little pit as we wait for it to finish. Our moods have picked up some since this mornin'.

"Be honest, Daryl. Beth took that deer down." Everybody laughs, Daryl rolls his eyes. Michonne smiles at him, her harmless ribbin' is somethin' he's used to by now. They're good friends an' that's hard to come by these days.

"Yeah, with her bare hands." He smiles at her as he says it. The laughter feels right, even given how the day started. I still like to believe that there's hope for a brighter tomorrow. I know we've been knocked down constantly, but every time we still get right back up. That has to count for somethin'.

Carl sits next to me an' talks about what he thinks D.C. will be like. I feel rude that I'm only half listenin', but it's pretty hard to take your eyes offa someone like Daryl. He's cuttin' at pieces of meat to give out to us. Glenn had found a large cardboard box in the trunk of a car an' had ripped it to pieces to use as plates. Carl an' I get our plates an' start chewin' at the tender meat. When Eugene gets his plate, he sits on my other side. I smile politely at him.

"How're you doin' tonight, Beth?" I tell him that I'm much better now that we have food. He seems excited that I went on a hunt with Daryl. He starts to talk to me about some video game he used to play at an arcade, one with plastic guns that you aimed at deer an' bears on the screen. I pretend to be interested, but I was never one for video games. By the way Rosita glares at him, I get the impression that he brings this up a lot.

"An' I held the highest score on that game for the next six months. There ain't a much better feelin' than seein' my name at the top of the line every weekend I went in there. Not to brag, of course." Of course. He had just complimented me on how pretty my shirt was when I hear a throat clear in front of us. I look up to see him with a cold scowl on his face. His tone is rough when he speaks to Eugene.

"You're in my spot." I feel dizzy at the insinuation that he wants to sit by me here, in front of everyone. Poor Eugene just smiles up at him an' apologizes. He tells me we'll continue our conversation at a later time, then he takes his seat by Rosita. Daryl sits down next to me an' nudges my shoulder. I smile at him as he shoves a piece of meat in his mouth. I feel so stupid for how attracted I am to him. Even the way he eats is manly. He licks his fingers an' it makes me think back to this afternoon in the woods, lickin' his fingers as he walked up to me.

A shiver runs through me, deceivin' as I feel warm. Daryl notices. He takes off his vest an' pulls the long sleeved flannel he's wearin' off. Leavin' him in a shirt with ripped off sleeves. He hands me the flannel, puttin' his vest back on when I take it. I feel myself blush, but put it on right away. It smells like smoke an' tobacco. Further proof of his masculinity. I look back at him to see he's starin' at me, an' I bite my lip at the intensity of his gaze. I begin to wonder what he's thinkin'. Then I remember that we ain't alone out here. I feel my stomach drop when I look over an' see Maggie watchin' us. I smile innocently at her an' continue to eat my venison.

Once we've finished eatin', Daryl an' Rick agree to take the first watch. As everybody makes their way to the places they've set up, his hand tugs at my elbow. With nobody lookin' he leans down from behind me, his breath ticklin' my ear.

"I called the truck earlier. Get in it's bed. I'll be there at the end of my shift." He presses his lips to the soft skin under my ear an' heads off with Rick without another word. My heart is hammerin' as I make my way over to the truck, relieved that Maggie an' Glenn are already tucked away in the car behind it. They won't even know this is where I went.

I lift up the door of the cap an' drop the tailgate as quietly as I can. When I'm finally in an' closed back up, I realize Daryl had made a bed for us in here. There are old sheets to lay on, the kind that used to be used to cover the floor while you painted. The fabric wasn't soft by any definition, but it sure beat layin' on the bare bed. I don't know how long he'd be out on watch, but the lack of sleep I've had has finally won the battle. I close my eyes as I clasp the sheet over me.

It must be near midnight when I hear the cap door open. He climbs gracefully over the tailgate an' slips in beside me once we're closed in again. The moon is high in the cloudless sky. The stars are perfectly visible as I look out the cap window. I feel Daryl's arm slip over me as he moves closer to me. I turn to face him, the moonlight shinin' brightly through our windows. It's so beautiful out here. I place my hand on his face, my thumb brushes over the stubble at his cheek. His eyes are softened, his full attention on me. It makes my insides melt. He lets out a sigh before he speaks.

"I gotta keep my eye on Mullet." I giggle at his nickname for Eugene, but his eyes don't show humor.

"You can't be serious? He was sweet. Somethin' about video games an' high scores." The look on his face makes me cover my mouth to hide the laugh. He's bein' ridiculous.

"You didn't see the way he was lookin' at you. Like you were the last glass of water in the fuckin' Sahara." I can't believe he's insinuatin' that. But I humor him, all the same.

"What's so wrong with him thinkin' I'm somethin' worth lookin' at?" The look he had changes in an instant. No longer is it hardened by resentment towards our new friend, it looks more like worry. I notice he's bitin' the tip of his thumb again. I've learned that it's a sign he's thinkin' somethin' over.

"I don't like the way he looks at you like that." I give up. I'd no sooner turn water into wine than get him to answer me directly. I don't see what the big deal is. If anything, Eugene has way more beautiful girls to be starin' at. But I don't ask Daryl what's so special about me. It's obvious I'm a last resort out here. Maggie's with Glen, Rosita's with Abraham an' Sasha's with Bob, now. Michonne makes it obvious that she only sees us all as family. The four of them are what men would want to have. They're all gorgeous an', unlike me, strong.

I realize my hand is rubbin' at the scar on my wrist. It's somethin' I do when I think about how weak I am. It reminds me of a time when I was at my lowest point in life. Where I had wanted to give up. It was a stupid, selfish act. Daryl had called it a cry for attention. I didn't think it was that. If I'm honest, I wanted to die. I felt no reason to live anymore. Had I known what I was doin' when I pulled that glass across my wrist, I probably wouldn't be here right now. Next to him.

I feel his hand reach up my arm. His fingers gently skim over the scar. I'm almost ashamed that he saw what I was doin'. He had made it very clear how he felt on that matter. His finger brushes back an' forth over the raised skin, soft enough to soothe my thoughts. I rest my head against his chest. I feel vulnerable an' exposed with his hand there. But I also know I need it.

"I get why you did it." I almost jumped at his words. He's been so quiet for the last few minutes. I pull my eyes away from his hand at my wrist an' look up. When I don't say anything, he continues. "I ain't sayin' it was a good idea. But I get it. I know what it feels like to want to fall asleep an' never wake up. I'm glad you didn't." I can't imagine strong, survivor-man Daryl Dixon ever lookin' at any other option but the will to live. I don't know if he read the confusion on my face, or if he's been meanin' to get it off his chest for a while.

"I told you my past was ugly. My mom died when I was a kid, smokin' her Virginia Slims in bed. The house went up in flames, took her with it. Completely erased her from the earth. Almost didn't seem real." He sighs, an' I wait for him to continue. "The old man resented her for it. For leavin' him with me an' Merle, the house bein' gone. Everything. He thought he'd find all the answers at the bottom of a bottle. Our house was fulla empty bottles, but not one of them had whatever fuckin' answer he was lookin' for." I tense up at the realization that, not only is this the most I've ever heard Daryl speak, but that he is tellin' me about his childhood.

"One night, he came home an' saw me cryin' while I was holdin' one of my mom's pictures. It really pissed him off. I won't go into it, but he beat the shit outta me. It wasn't the first time that belt lit me up, but it started a whole new world for me. I looked up to Merle to save me, I knew the son of a bitch had been beatin' my brother, too. But Merle was never 'round. After a few years, I had grown used to it. One night he was beatin' me for bumpin' into him an' makin' him spill his shine all down his front. When that belt cut my skin, I hoped he'd go too far an' kill me. That I no longer had to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. But no higher power or helpin' hand rescued me. I saved myself when I was old enough to pack my shit up an' run 'round with Merle." An' I knew where it went from there. How he followed Merle all those years since.

He sits up then, pulls my hand to his mouth an' kisses the scar on my wrist. I could feel my pulse quicken, I had to look away. The gesture was sweet, carin'. I thought my heart would explode if I stared too long. But he lets go of my hand an' pulls off his vest. When that's cast aside, he starts undoin' the buttons on his shirt. He won't look at me. I watch as he slowly pulls the shirt offa him. My mouth goes dry at the sight of his bare chest an' his stomach. He reaches down to me, his hand pullin' me up so I'm sittin' opposite of him. He leans into me, both hands holdin' my face as he kisses me. His lips are rough against mine an' I feel cheated when he pulls away. I watch as he's hunched over, he looks so haunted that I just want to hold him. Before I get the chance, he's turned away from me.

The moonlight flashes across his back an' a small sob gets stuck in my throat. There are dark scars striped across his skin. I can't begin to count how many there are, but it's almost too much for me to look at. I now know why he had ever put up walls. His own father had mutilated his body. If you can't trust your father, why would you trust anyone. All of the pieces start to fall into place now.

I can't see his face, but I see his shoulders are tightened, hunched over. I imagine this would have been what his father saw every time he struck him. The thought that it never made him stop causes a bitter taste in my mouth. I sat there quietly, just starin' at the lines when I realize he isn't movin'. He hasn't said a word. I feel sick when I think he's broken again. I don't even hesitate as I push myself up an' throw my arms 'round him. I hold him as tight as I can, tears fall from my cheek onto his skin. I can feel his muscles loosenin' up, very slowly. The only thing I can think of is to whisper his own words in his ear.

"S'alright, Daryl. I'm here." He turns his face to me an' I'm stricken with the stoic man lookin' back at me. But he won't move. I crawl 'round in front of him, pausin' only for a moment before I decide to throw caution to the wind, an' I climb into his lap. He doesn't even flinch, just wraps his arms 'round me an' pulls me to his chest. I can't be certain how long we stay like that. I was startin' to fall asleep when I felt him shift me to the side, layin' me back down. His body was pressed tight against the back of mine, his arms were firmly wrapped 'round me. I felt myself drift away. When my eyes were closed I felt his lips on the top of my head. He held them there for a while. I'm sure he thought I was already asleep. For the most part, I had thought I was dreamin'. His mouth moved down to my ear, his lips brushed gently on my lobe just as he whispered to me.

"I love you, Beth."


"Glenn which one of these do you think Beth's in?" He's still pullin' on his shirt. I'm already dressed an' just waitin' to find my sister. Michonne had said there was a stream 'round here somewhere. I figured we could go down an' wash up.

"She isn't awake yet?" He looks 'round the camp.

"I haven't seen her yet. I hope she didn't sleep alone last night. I feel awful thinkin' of her by herself." Glenn smiles at me. I know what he's thinkin', an' I don't think I'm bein' overprotective. Beth's an adult. She can sleep wherever she wants. There's nothin' wrong with me wantin' to know where she is.

The truck in front of us opens up, the tailgate drops. Glenn looks quickly back at me an' says, "Don't freak out." I step to the side to see what he's talkin' about. All I can make out is Daryl puttin' on his shirt. I see a pale arm hold out his vest to him, watch as he smiles back at the bed when he takes it. Then he grabs the hand attached to that arm an' pulls the person out. I see the long blonde curls, the small hand squeezin' at his bicep as the pretty young girl smiles up at him.

"Maggie, stop!" I only barely hear Glenn's voice as I storm over to that truck. I see her face fall, afraid. She damned well better be afraid. I get right up to him. He turns to look at me an' my fist makes a crackin' sound against his jaw. My hand screams in protest but I bite back the cry. Instead I shout.

"Daryl Dixon what the hell are you doin' with my little sister?"