James and Sirius were late for breakfast that Friday. As they hurried in, the Great Hall was noisier than usual. They glanced at each other. "What's going on?" asked Sirius, James just shrugged. But they found out soon enough.
Remus pushed the Prophet into James' hands as soon as he arrived at the table. He sat down beside him and looked down at it. On the front page was a large photograph of a burned down shop front and another photograph of the sky where the smoky figure of a skull and a snake coming out of it's mouth were floating. "That shop in Diagon Alley was attacked last night and it's owner killed," said Remus.
"What? Do they know why?" asked Sirius, taking the newspaper.
"They don't know, but someone's saying it's because the owner was a muggleborn..." Remus said with a worried expression. "His name was Dylan Hughes, he ran this old second-hand bookshop... we go to his shop every year to buy my books, mum's always excited to talk to him and his wife 'cos they're from Cardiff too."
"Oh Moony, I'm so sorry," said James.
"But why would someone kill a man just because he's muggleborn?" Remus asked.
"It says that the curse used to burn down the shop was called-" Sirius froze.
"What?" asked Peter.
Sirius looked up. "Apparently this was the work of dangerous dark wizard You-know-who and his followers. Who the hell is You-know-who?"
"Voldemort, Sirius," said James. "Don't you know? People are so frightened of him that they're refusing to say him name now. It's silly if you ask me. And the Prophet too, propagating the fear... idiots!"
"His followers are called Death eaters," said Sirius. "Merlin. It says that this skull-and-snake is a signature of you-kn- of Voldemort."
"Maybe we shouldn't say his name either," said Peter. James and Sirius looked at him angrily.
The whole school was talking of nothing but the attacks and most of the muggleborns either looked angry or frightened. As they walked to their first class, James looked for Lily and spotted her a few feet behind them, she was looking thoughtful. He pulled Sirius close to him. "Are you alright?" he whispered. Sirius nodded. "What happened?" he persisted.
Sirius grimaced. "I'm not sure. The Prophet says that Fiendfyre was used to burn down the shop- Grandfather would always tell us the story of this dark witch named Gormlaith Gaunt, who once used Fiendfyre to burn down a cottage. Bellatrix was so fascinated by the story that she asked grandfather to teach her how to make Fiendfyre-"
James abruptly stopped walking and gaped at him. "What the heck are you saying? Your cousin became one of those- what? Death eaters?!"
"Sirius sighed. "I don't know, mate. Over summer, I heard Bella and Cissy talking about him, you know. Bellatrix sounded like she was already in love with him-"
"Great Godric! Bellatrix became a death-eater and cast Fiendfyre to burn down someone's shop!" whispered James, looking horrified.
"I am not sure! It could have been anyone, I mean anyone who is interested in Dark Arts might know how to cast Fiendfyre," said Sirius, nudging him so they started walking again.
"Let's not tell Peter just yet, he would be frightened," said James.
"Too close to home, huh?"
"I didn't mean it like that-"
"Don't worry, I get it," Sirius said and smiled. Peter and Remus were at the top of the stairs, waiting for them. Peter waved at them.
Saturday was another Hogsmeade weekend, but Remus decided that it would be a revision weekend. "No Hogsmeade, lads. No games... And no pranks," he said, as he dragged the other three to the library after an early breakfast. "Over this weekend, we are going to try and revise everything we learnt in Defence, up until now."
"What!" Peter yelped.
"Everything we learnt in fifth year only," Remus added, shaking his head. Peter sighed in relief.
People in the library, mostly Ravenclaws, were astonished to see the Marauders walk in and take their seats in the Defence section. James pulled Remus into the chair next to him and pushed the Defence textbook into his hands. "Alright men, let's do this!" he said, rubbing his palms together, and Remus smiled at his enthusiasm. This was James' nature. He never whined about studying like the other two. The four Marauders sat, working diligently for the next twenty minutes.
Then Sirius had a question about the amount of energy released in a curse, compared to a hex or a charm. "I read about it, I know I did," said Remus, tapping the table with his fingers. "Yes! It's in that book called, Dissection of a hex."
Sirius nodded and stood up to get the book. He browsed through Aisle 'D', found the book, and was bringing it back to their table, when a girl with a pixie cut walked up to him and grinned.
Sirius smiled at her and said, "Hey Amanda, how's it going?"
Amanda Wallace smiled back and said, "Pretty good."
James looked up from his notebook and spotted them talking. "Moony, Moooony!" he said, shaking Remus' shoulder.
"What?" Remus whispered.
"What are they talking about? Can you hear them?" Remus and Peter looked over at Sirius and Amanda.
"I don't think we're supposed to eavesdrop, Prongs," said Remus.
"Oh, come on, Moony, it's just Sirius. Please please pleeeease?"
"Alright, alright!" said Remus and looked over at them again. James and Peter grinned at each other.
"Nice day, isn't it?" he heard Amanda say.
"Gorgeous," replied Sirius. Remus tilted his head. That's odd.
"What?" asked Peter, eagerly.
"They're talking about the weather. Sirius just said, 'it's a gorgeous day'," Remus told them.
The other two laughed. It was the coldest Saturday of November. "He is flirting with her!" whispered Peter.
"This feels somewhat evil," said Remus nervously.
"In a bit, I was thinking of going to Hogsmeade to buy some stationery. I remember you said yesterday in Muggle Studies that you needed a new quill? Wanna come with?" Amanda asked Sirius.
"I would, but I promised Remus we would study with him today, and he'd get pissed if I don't. So, I can't," Sirius said apologetically.
"Remus? Who is that?" she asked.
"Remus Lupin. He's- He's one of my best friends," said Sirius.
"The Prefect? But, isn't Potter your best friend?" she asked.
"He is, they both are. So is-"
She chuckled. "That's a good joke."
Sirius frowned. "It's not a joke. We have to study. Sorry, Amanda," he said with a finality in his tone.
James nudged Remus. "What are they saying now?"
"She just asked him to Hogsmeade," mumbled Remus.
"Holy Merlin!" said James and Peter at the same time.
"But he said no," mumbled Remus. He felt a little mortified. So what do people think Pete and I are? Just hangers-on?
"Oh," said Peter and James chuckled.
"No worries. Maybe another time then," she said brightly, touching his elbow.
"Yeah, maybe," he replied and she left.
The three of them watched as Sirius walked back to their table and sat down. "Okay, do you know which chapter it was in?" he asked Remus, who didn't even look up from the passage he was writing out.
James chortled. "Amanda's an awesome chaser. And she's really chill as well. It wouldn't kill you to go on an actual date once in a while," he teased, smirking at him.
"You heard us?" Sirius asked, and then looked at Remus and narrowed his eyes. "You sly wolf." Remus pretended not to hear him.
"Oh, that's one of chasers on the Ravenclaw team! That's where I know her from," said Peter, and James nodded.
"Yeah, she's also in our Muggle Studies class. Remus didn't want to, but I made him listen in," he said, grinning.
But Sirius was looking at Remus, who seemed mad. Oh, shit.
"Yeah, you should have. James is right," Remus said casually, still writing.
"About what?" asked Sirius.
"You should've accepted the invitation," he said, finally looking at him. "I wouldn't have gotten pissed if you had a date."
"I didn't mean it like that-" Sirius began.
"Why not? That's the only reason you're here, isn't it?" he said a little louder.
"But-"
"Look, if the only reason you're not going out with someone is cos your friend might get angry, then that's ridiculous," said Remus. "Go ahead. No one's stopping you."
"What happened?" asked Peter.
"Sirius is only here because he doesn't want to deal with me getting angry," accused Remus.
"I didn't say that," said Sirius crossly.
"Don't lie," Remus told him.
"I'm not lying, I do want to study," said Sirius.
"Why didn't you tell her that, then? Why mention me at all?" Remus asked.
"Because no one will believe me if I tell them I want to study instead of going on a date! I'm Sirius Black, remember?!" said Sirius.
"Yeah, even I don't!" Remus retorted, making Sirius scrunch up his mouth with rage.
"Guys... please don't fight again," Peter pleaded, putting his hands on their hands.
"I don't want to feel like I'm forcing you all to sit here and study, alright? You can go ahead and do whatever you want, no need to make me the excuse," Remus said to all of them.
"That's crap, I want to study, I want to get good OWLs," said James immediately.
Peter hesitated. That's the exact reason why he was here. He didn't want to deal with Remus being angry and fussy all day. I'd rather do my Astronomy essay, you know.
James looked at Peter, his eyebrows raised, urging him to say something.
"Well... er... sorry Remus, it's just that I had that Astronomy essay to finish," said Peter.
"Oh," said Remus awkwardly. "Then, do that."
Peter cheered up. "Will you help me search for the books I need?" he asked enthusiastically, and Remus chuckled.
"Yeah, okay. Let's go," he said, and they both went to the Astronomy section, leaving a fuming Sirius and a chuckling James at the table.
Remus sat on the floor of the aisle, flipping through some books. "I remember, it was the sixth edition, Wormy. The new ones don't have it," he was telling Peter.
Peter climbed a ladder, searching for the book, then he stopped and turned around to look down at Remus. "Moony, I know what you're feeling right now, but you don't ever have to feel like you're forcing your company on us. Of course they might be best friends, but we are the Marauders," he said.
"I know. But it's just the way he said it," said Remus, looking up at him.
Peter blinked in thought. "Yes, but the four of us, I think... we balance each other out, it's... it's needed," he told him, nodding.
"Thanks, Pete," said Remus, smiling up at him.
"And besides, Sirius would've probably said anything to get out of that date, it didn't look like he likes Amanda at all," said Peter, and resumed his search for the sixth edition.
That cheered Remus up.
Back at the table, Sirius folded his arms crossly. "Why am I always wrong?"
James chuckled again. "It's your own fault, who asked you to say that?"
"Well, it's the truth, isn't it?" said Sirius.
James shrugged and picked up his quill again. "I for one, am glad it's the truth. Do you think there's anyone else who bothers about our grades?"
Sirius rolled his eyes, but he knew James was right. And when Remus and Peter returned, he straightened up in his seat and watched Remus sit down, avoiding his eye.
"I'll go and get my essay then, it's in the dorm," said Peter, mournful at the thought of walking all the way to the Tower and back. Remus nodded and he walked away.
"Remus," Sirius said and Remus looked up at him. "Sorry about that."
Remus stared at him, eyebrows furrowed. Instead of apologising for making that comment, it felt like he was apologising for the girl being interested in him. Shit! Because, that was what I was actually angry about... Did I behave like that because I was jealous?! Oh God, noooooo! "Fuck!" he whispered to himself.
"What?" asked Sirius, confused.
"No. No, I'm sorry," Remus said, shaking his head.
"But-"
"It's fine, let's just forget about it," said Remus heartily, fake-grinning.
Sirius smiled brightly and nodded, filling Remus' stomach with butterflies. Then he pushed the open book under Remus' nose. "Is this what you were talking about?" he asked, pointing at a paragraph.
It took Remus a few seconds to remember what they'd been discussing before the whole Amanda thing happened, then he nodded. "Yeah, yeah, this exactly," he said, trying to sound normal. He took the book and turned a few pages rapidly, while looking around the library. He spotted Lily near the Journals section. Her dark red hair was like a beacon, easy to spot in a crowd. Then he turned the book and gave it back to Sirius. "Look, read this whole chapter, it's a small chapter, but with the examples the author gives, you'll understand the whole concept perfectly," he said quickly and stood up. He needed to get out of there to clear his head. "I'll be right back. I think I see..." he let his voice trail away and left.
"Where's he going?" asked Sirius.
"Probably spotted Evans somewhere," said James, grinning.
As Remus made his way towards Lily's table, he spotted Severus hovering nearby. He looked like he wanted to go and talk to Lily, but was hesitating. Best to leave Snape alone…
Remus paused, and then he turned left and walked into a random aisle and leaned against the books. What are you doing, Remus? Stop being ridiculous! Even if he was gay, what do you expect? That he'll go out with you? He's Sirius Black! Why would he want to go out with a dumb werewolf like you, when he can literally have anyone?! Yeah, when he can have Amanda. Oh, forget Amanda! You should just focus on studying and getting good grades, it's the only thing you deserve. You don't deserve anything else... especially after everything they've done for you. You are not fucking things up again for something stupid like a crush.
Sirius stared after Remus with a look of longing. Then he sighed loudly.
"What is it?" James asked him condescendingly, not looking up from his notes.
"Prongs, I am done for... finished! Kaput!"
James looked at him, perplexed. "Huh?"
Sirius made a miserable face. "What's the use?! It's not like it's gonna go anywhere! I'd rather just forget about it!" he said, looking up at the ceiling.
"What are you on about, mate?" asked James.
"Remus," said Sirius, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
But James looked back at him blankly.
"He's the reason I said no to Amanda?" said Sirius, in the same manner.
James frowned. "Remus likes Amanda?"
If there had been a video camera filming them, Sirius would've stared at it, like in The Office. Instead, he shook his head. "James, sometimes I wonder…"
"What?" asked James. "You just told me you said no to her because of him… does he disapprove of Amanda?"
Sirius sighed again. "No."
"So, you don't actually like Amanda, right?"
"No, Prongs. I don't care about Amanda. I'm a homo, remember? Gay," he whispered.
"Oh yeah, er… of course I remember," then James looked like he finally understood. "Ah, then who do you care about?"
Sirius was about to speak, but James grinned. "Oh, wait, Remus knows who it is, doesn't he?"
Sweet Salazar, he can be really thick sometimes. Sirius held James' head firmly in his hands and spoke. "It's Remus, James."
"Merlin's pants!" said James loudly. Everyone looked around at them curiously, and Sirius shushed him.
"This is a library, James," he informed him.
"You like Moony?" James leaned in and whispered excitedly.
Sirius shook his head. "Prongs… I love him," he said.
James struggled to find words. "Y-You love him… since when?!" he asked, wondering how in the world he had missed this.
"I don't know... it came on so slowly, then one day I just found myself in love," Sirius replied.
"When was the day?"
"Remember last year, just before the finals, when we had to do that essay on Clabberts, and Remus offered to do mine for me because I had a cold?" said Sirius, sniggering.
"Sirius, be serious!"
"I literally am," he said, grinning.
James groaned. "Tell me more."
"Er... I guess it was when I saw him hanging out with Dorcas all the time," sighed Sirius, putting his face in his hands.
"I'm not completely blind. I did suspect something," said James.
Sirius looked up again. "Really?"
"Christmas last year-" James continued.
"Yeah, no need to remind me how obvious I was," said Sirius.
"Not you. Later, when Remus and I went down to retrieve the chocolate from the One-eyed witch passage," said James.
"Huh?"
"I was saying that I wasn't as observant as you were, and that I didn't even know yours or Peter's exact eye colours," said James, smirking. "He described your eyes as a rain cloud grey. I didn't know what to think of that then, but-"
"What are you saying?" asked Sirius uncertainly.
"That maybe he likes you too?" James said, full of hope.
Sirius simply looked at him with a sad smile. "Because he described- but that might not mean anything though…"
"Oh, come on," said James, trying to convince him. "The other day, when Peter mentioned Cecilia-"
"Yeah," said Sirius, chuckling. "Peter always knows the right thing to say... even though he doesn't know he's saying it!"
"I saw the way you two were looking at each other that day. It was so obvious, mate," said James.
"Really?" Sirius asked again.
"Well, it's obvious now..." James nodded excitedly. "Tell him! Today!" he said, thrilled at the idea.
"I don't know if you've noticed, Prongs, I tell him every day."
James gaped at him. Sirius did tell him everyday. He would always say, 'Love you, Moony'. "But not like that. Properly. Officially," he said.
"But he never says it back," Sirius reminded him.
"Hmmm, yeah. It's like this," James explained. "Either he just likes you as mates, or there's like something holding him back."
"I don't know, mate," said Sirius, shaking his head. "Either way, I'm not going to spring this on him without being one hundred percent sure… this is Remus Lupin we're talking about."
"I get the feeling something big is going to happen between you two in the near future," said James, looking into the distance.
"Why are you talking that way? It sounds like I'm reading a novel or something," said Sirius.
James laughed. "It's true, I feel it in my bones," he said, pointing at his arm.
"As long as we don't have a big fight again," said Sirius worriedly. "We just made up."
Peter came back with his essay and sat down heavily on his chair and it creaked dangerously. "I'm back."
"Is Remus still with Evans?" said James.
"Nope."
"Then where did he go?" asked Sirius, looking around.
"I don't know, but I just saw Evans talking to the grease-pot Snivellus," said Peter, sniggering.
James grimaced and Sirius laughed at him.
"What are you laughing at, you half-wit? You're in the same boat," said James.
Sirius turned James' jumper bright yellow.
Author's note: Thank you Ann, for your kind review :) :) :)
