I chuckled a little bit too much at the reviews that thanked my girlfriend for threatening to kill me if I finished this story on a bad note...so thanks for those...LOL!

It seems I found a new wind of inspiration and even though the updates are not coming as thick and fast as they used to be, I hope you guys are enjoying it!

Well, Emily has got fire in her belly thanks to the wonders of Miffy and has just got to get her blonde bombshell back...

Enjoy! :)

Chapter 29 – Trial And Error

Naomi:

Have you ever noticed that when you could really do with something hurrying up and fucking off, every moment is in slow motion? You're watching everything through the same eyes you look through usually, but in some annoyingly fucked up way it all seems that much slower. Each movement is exasperated, each second seems to last an eternity and every heartbeat seems lost in the amalgamation of time. Almost as if the world knows you want it just to finish and is purposefully not spinning as fast on its axis, not running in circles around the sun with its usual speed...just to piss you off. Or maybe it's because these moments that we want to get rid of are usually the ones we look back on as major points in our lives, time is just trying to help us appreciate each detail of them in the long run. We hate it at the time but generally, in the end, it helps.

"Naomi Campbell?" If I had ten pounds for every time someone had said my name with that twinge of 'oh my God is it the model?' I would be a millionaire by now. It's always the same thing, they read out my name, look around wild eyed and see that I am the only one sat there looking at them with an expression that hopefully makes my point for me.

"Oh my gosh it is you...Naomi Campbell...the model..." I stared at the poor bitch for a few seconds trying to work out whether she was mentally deranged, blind or just plain stupid; until it hit me.

"From Sweet Disposition yeah?" She popped her gum at me and it took all my reserve not to smash her in the face, the only thing saving her from my wrath was the fact that she was obviously of some importance in this god forsaken place.

"No actually I work for..." I stopped myself before I could finish my sentence and looked poignantly at her shoes, I didn't work for anyone and I fucking missed it...almost as much as I missed her. I couldn't be bothered to continue my rambling; it would just end up in the barriers I had managed to erect crumbling down around me, giving the currently absent tears chance to fall.

"...she works for Alternative Reality bitch..." I span around so fast all I could see was a blur of the most fantastic red, my absolute favourite colour in the word blinded me for a few perfect seconds until I realised that I had left her...and I had done it for a logical reason, however much it fucking hurt. She was smiling at me, I had gone over scenario after scenario about meeting her again but no matter what weird and wacky event I thought of she definitely wasn't smiling. I had expected her to rant and rave at me, or worse, stand back and watch as Katie devoured me and dragged me down to the pits of hell. I couldn't move, my heart was threatening to break full force out of its cage; I was feeling ever so slightly nauseous and knew beyond all rational thought that she was the only person that could have this much of an effect on me just by smiling.

I had missed everything about her, the way that when she crossed her arms in front of her it made her tits look perfect, the way her hair shone a multitude of different reds in the sun and most importantly those eyes. The chocolate brown orbs that had me from the very first moment...there was nothing I could compare them too, I had never seen anything like them before and very much doubted I would ever see anything so beautiful. The only thing I knew about her eyes for certain was that I could just look into them forever and die happy.

"Miss Campbell, they need you in there now..." Fuck my life, out of all the possible moments for this ignorant piece of bubble gum blowing shit to actually act professional, she chooses this one. I felt her hands on my arm, pulling me gently towards the double doors that lead to me realising the insane errors of my past. I sighed gently and managed to glance towards her, watching while the comprehension of just what I was here for, settled on her perfect face. Her smile faltered only briefly as Katie took her hand and Miffy put hers on Emily's shoulder, it hurt to see how much like a family they were, no...It hurt to see that I hadn't become part of that family because of my own damn issues. That was the second time I had to turn away from her and leave; and the second time I could quite easily kill myself because I knew her hurting was all down to me.

Freddie looked fucking lost and with every word I uttered in that witness box I watched his eyes fall further and further towards the floor. I hadn't been able to watch Cook give 'evidence' it was too painful to watch him drink himself slowly to death, let alone actually talk about the incident. I felt so fucking helpless, I had tried constantly to get him out of his drunken stupor but it seemed that whatever I did just ended up making it worse. I knew in part he blamed me and that was difficult enough to deal with, but watching him talk about the moment when his world fell apart, would have destroyed me.

I had never been big on formalities; I tended to shy away from anything having actual rules and regulations that needed adhering to. Even my home life lacked any form of structure, I didn't do well with being told that I wasn't allowed to do things, or that I could do them but I had to do them in a particular way. Yet here I was being asked to sit straight and tell the fucking truth about something that I was still entirely sure was my own fault and perhaps more than that, I had to watch the inevitable as Freddie got sent down for a good few years. My mind was a mess of guilt and terrible memories that these annoyingly fucking probing questions were dragging up from the depths of repression. Making concentrating worse was Emily, she was sat there, serene faced, looking down at me and still fucking smiling. Don't get me wrong, I was completely in love with her smile, the small dimples that creased over her cheeks and the way her eyebrows moved slightly just to make her look even more cute, but I never expected to see her again this soon...and smiling. It was just a little unnerving and I was in complete shock that my body was reacting in such a way.

"Miss Campbell, how would you describe your relationship with the defendant Mr McClair?" I had never thought of myself as dumb, having a shit common sense was one thing but I would have never described myself as a fuckwit, so why the hell were they still asking me about my relationship with him. They had three eye witnesses that saw Freddie behind the wheel of the car, he had pleaded guilty for fuck sake...I didn't need these memories of him dug up from the depths, especially in front of the girl I still loved. But like I said, rules and swearing on the fucking bible seemed to force me to not only answer the wigged cunt's questions but to tell the whole truth and nothing but the fucking truth. To say I was pissed off was the understatement of the millennium.

"Freddie was a good boyfriend, I thought I was in love with him but I was wrong because I've known love since him and it is so powerful I can't believe I ever thought I had it with him...he was kind of boring and...Well; I had to do the right thing for me...that's why I left him." I had to take a heavy deep breath to compose myself and hold back tears. I wasn't an emotional person but the look on Freddie's face got worse with every word that I uttered in answer to these probing questions, the only saving grace I had was that when this was over I got to spend a few more lost moments in her deep russet eyes.

I answered that bastard's questions, each one bringing another painful memory up from the depths, I told him about the good moments that Freddie and I had shared and I told him all about me breaking his fucking heart in two. Each word made me realise just how much of a heartless cow I was, I hated myself, I had destroyed not only his life but Cook's as well and I had sabotaged my only chance at happiness; even if Emily was still smiling at me.

"No more questions..." I practically ran out of there, the jury had been sent to make their decision even though everyone knew what the outcome would be. Guilty. He wasn't going to be the only one found guilty, I was feeling it. Guilt was one of those emotions that would completely take you over if you let it and right now I was drowning in it.

I needed some fresh air; I needed to breathe in something that didn't smell like lacquered tweed mixed with old spice, nicotine should do quite nicely. Late August really was fucking beautiful, red was burnt everywhere and watching the breeze whip the leaves from the trees, waiting while they fell idly to the floor just seemed so fucking peaceful. Even the sun seemed warmer despite the goose bumps rising up over my skin, I couldn't be completely sure but I figured that was something to do with the suppressed nerves and naive expectation rather than the weather. My entire body was shaking, every time I took a drag of my cigarette I risked singeing my eyebrows or setting my top on fire I was so fucking jittery. I was aching for her, after one glance I was already falling head over heels all over again; it had taken me so long to block out memories of her and even longer to start thinking that I would ever be remotely happy again. Yet here I was, having been in her luscious company for no more than a minute and I already needed her so badly, my heart was already dancing it's ecstatic dance and my head was starting to spin with the beautiful recollections of her that had come flooding back to me.

I just stood watching nature roll around me and smiled into the changing world for the first time in what seemed like an eternity of bleakness. Its amazing how one person can change your perspective on everything, just by turning up out of the blue and smiling at me Emily Fitch had bought the beauty back to my universe and I was beginning to realise how much of a complete prick I had been to even contemplate letting her go.

"Got one for me?" I was brought back to reality with a thump, for some strange reason life has a way of letting you know that everything is always going to be shit, the best you can hope for is that you find someone wonderful to help you forget all the crap. In my case I had not only found that certain someone, I had thrown her away just because I was too proud to ask for her help, it was all fucked up. Cook was staring at me, holding out his hand for a smoke, I gave him the packet and sat down on the cool concrete step waiting for...well in truth I was waiting for Emily, even though I doubted she had followed me. I guess there isn't anything harmful about living in hope, even if it turns out to be a falsity.

One of the best things about mine and Cook's relationship had always been that words were usually unnecessary. We knew each other so well that we didn't need to talk all the time, we could tell with a single glance or smirk just what the other was thinking. But now, we didn't talk because we had too much to say, in a way we were so similar it was a little fucking creepy and it was due to that connection I knew that he was shutting down. He was closing himself in and if no one got through to him soon I feared her was going to drink himself to death...or worse. Cook was a pillar of strength, splashing around through life not caring who or what got hurt because of him but I hadn't seen him this broken since his mother relapsed. I loved him so much, we had been together through so much and I couldn't fucking help him...he wasn't letting me help him because in part he blamed me. I was falling and in truth, I couldn't see a way to stop myself.

"They're ready to deliver the verdict..." I'm not sure how long I had been stood there staring into the proverbial space but when I snapped back to reality I found that Cook had chain smoked through the rest of my fags and actually gone back inside without me paying one iota of attention to it. I really needed to stop zoning out for minutes at a time, one day it would probably get me in some serious fucking trouble. I swallowed deeply, closed my eyes tightly against all the shit and took a resounding deep breath. I knew I was never actually going to be ready to face the next few minutes of my life but I understood that it was a closure that I needed to go through.

If I ever saw the inside of a courtroom again it would be too soon, it was such a cold place and I'm not thinking about the temperature. The thought of how many murderers, rapists, burglars and paedophiles that you just know have been stood mere inches away from where you are now sat. That horrendous notion alone was enough to make me feel fucking queasy; but add in the fact that I was about to watch a genuinely nice guy get sent down for a long time for turning into a complete cunt, it was really all becoming a little too much to bear. Tears were starting to sting behind empty eyes and I felt my entire body drain of all emotions as Freddie stood looking completely broken. Cook strained beside me and I felt his strength wash all over me, that and hate, deep set anger rushed over the air between us as he looked over at his former best friend. I was finding it hard to breathe, every flutter of my heart within my chest was laboured and I was physically shaking with the cruellest touch of apprehension. He was guilty, everyone knew he was fucking guilty but I would be lying if there wasn't the tiniest part of me that wanted him to have a second chance, a stint in rehab or some counselling to get him through it...get him back to who he used to be; before my absence sent him over the edge.

The judge emerged and we all had to wait as the jury were seated, my leg was thumping against the wooden plinth we were sat on. I was finding it hard just to control my body and tears started to stream in non-relenting rivers down my paling cheeks, I couldn't do this. It was then I felt a hand rest on mine, I hadn't seen her arrive, I hadn't even felt her move against me...the first thing I knew of her presence was the resounding warmth of her skin flaming with mine. She moved closer then, inch by inch until the side of her thigh was practically burning through my trousers, my entire body was on fire for her and just the merest touch of her fingertips running over my thigh was enough to calm me thoroughly. I closed my eyes and intertwined fingers, one brief look into her beautiful face gave me all the composure that I needed and I took another heavy breath...

"Guilty..." It was that moment that made me realise just how much I would always need her.

Well, there ya have it, things might be looking up for our beautiful girls...and who knows if Emily can get her blonde bombshell through it; there might be some smut on the horizon! ;)

Hope you liked it and it would be ever so awesome of you to leave me a review...speaking of reviews, there is a line in this chapter about Emily's eyes, this was courtesy of my gorgeous girlfriend who keeps assuring me she 'doesn't have a way with words' it would be super awesome if, in your already brilliant reviews, you tell her how wrong she is!

Big love to you all again, but you don't need me to tell you that! :D