Disclaimer Everything belongs to Paramount, I believe

Chapter Twenty Nine

"Spock, I looked over the applications," Prof Cormier said when she came into his office on Thursday. They had 27 minutes until the interviews began, and Prof Cormier had reviewed applications the night before to acquaint herself with the students. Spock looked up in acknowledgement of a fact he already knew.

"Uhura's isn't here," Prof Cormier noted, tapping through her PADD as though searching for it.

Spock folded his hands before him. "She did not submit one," he responded.

"But…I thought she wanted this job," Prof Cormier frowned. "I thought you wanted her to have this job."

"I did not ask her for an application as I already have her information," Spock explained, once more confused by the professor's questions. "I believe the purpose of the interviews is to acquaint myself with the applicants?"

"Well, yes…" Prof Cormier began.

"I am already acquainted with Cadet Uhura."

"But that's not the point, Spock." Alice was beginning to understand why Commander Lee had assigned her to contribute to his hiring process. "You can't hire her without an application."

"I did not see this rule in the procedural for TA positions," Spock replied with a tilted head. If he had defied Star Fleet code, he was not aware of it. With curiosity, he watched Prof Cormier sigh.

"Respectfully, Spock…" Prof Cormier started carefully, "I've done this more times than you have." Giving him a look he could not categorize, she finished, "And I probably know more about this area of Terran etiquette than you do." Spock acknowledged her with a thoughtful dip of his head. "So will you trust me on this, please? Get Nyota to submit an application?"

Spock surveyed her for a long moment, considering her words. Then he replied expressionlessly, "I will request an application from Cadet Uhura. Would you advise I also conduct an interview?"

"Yes, I would." Prof Cormier glanced at her watch. "But first we have to get through these nine."

XXX

"What are three adjectives that describe aspects of your personality which you believe will assist in your duties as TA?" Spock asked of his first student, a small girl who sat uncertainly in her chair, her hands moving distractingly.

"Uhh…I'm hardworking," she suggested. "Quiet. And I'll stay out of your way?"

"In what ways would the latter assist in your duties?" he asked expressionlessly, wanting to clarify.

"Well, I mean, obviously I'll be available when I'm needed. I just won't get, you know, in the way. Of you," the girl elaborated.

Thinking her babbling might interfere with her effectiveness in the classroom, he asked, "Do you often speak without trajectory or is it a symptom of nerves?"

The girl blinked at him, her eyes widening, and increased her fidgeting. "Umm…I guess sometimes I babble a little when I'm nervous, but I'll try to stop. I won't talk too much when I'm working. Unless I need to be talking, at the time…" she trailed off.

As Spock opened his mouth to ask a follow up question, Alice sighed. This was going to be a long afternoon.

"Why do you wish to be a TA for Advanced Phonology?"

"I'm a communications major. I think it'll help with my people skills and I think I can help the younger kids with the course," answered the young man with a confident smile.

"In what ways are you more qualified than your competition for this assignment that I have not already read in your application?"

"I'm a leader, and I'm good at helping people."

"Can you produce proof of these qualities?"

The student's smile faltered. "Well, I worked at camp over a few summers and liked helping. I think I was effective in my leadership, and the kids did what I asked them to do. I worked at an academic camp once and I was useful."

Slightly frustrated, Spock repeated, "Can you produce proof of this?"

"I guess I could try to get a letter or something, but it would be hard to contact my supervisors…" the boy said with a definite frown now. "This is why I didn't put it in my application. So I could just tell you about it."

Though the student didn't notice, Spock's brow furrowed infinitesimally.

"Professor Cormier—"

"Please call me Alice, Spock."

"I have not discovered the purpose of these interviews."

Alice surveyed the professor from where she sat across his office, next to the door. "I don't know what to tell you, Spock. This is part of the process. You have to decide who you'd work well with."

"I am going to base my decision on the qualities of the applicants," Spock said. "I have made no new decisions based on the interviews."

Alice sighed. "We just have two more. Can we do them now?"

"Call in the next cadet."

XXX

"So you'll ask Nyota for an application?" Alice asked, trying to rub away the headache at her temple as she gathered her things to stand up.

"Yes," Spock confirmed, watching her begin to leave. If he was not mistaken, Prof Cormier appeared wearied even though the process had only taken the scheduled two hours. Admittedly, the seemingly pointless exercise had invited a dull ache into his own mind. As soon as Prof Cormier closed the door behind her with a nod, he lowered himself to the floor to meditate.

XXX

Nyota walked to Spock's office with a bounce in her step; she hoped that, with much of the afternoon and the whole evening before her, she might be able to finish her translation. She knew Spock would be available to help her for most of that time, which increased her odds quite a bit; she smiled to herself knowing Spock would calculate them exactly.

His door was unlocked, as he apparently was already inside. Entering to find him meditating, one eye peeked open at her as the door whooshed back closed, Nyota stepped quietly behind the desk. She liked when he meditated while she was there, because his deep, even breathing soothed her.

She began working eagerly, soon forgetting all but the words before her.

When Spock had eradicated the ache of his head, he stood quietly. Nyota didn't notice him, as she appeared absorbed in her work, and he watched the translation flow onto her page rapidly. She had increased her speed over the course of her project. Finally she glanced around, and turned back when she saw him standing beside her.

"Oh, I hadn't noticed you'd finished," she smiled. Spock checked his mental barriers carefully as he studied the contented expression on her features. "Can you help me with this word here?"

He leaned forward over her shoulder, aware of their proximity, to examine what she pointed to. When he'd seen it as he read ahead of her, he had assumed she would ask him about it. "You most likely know the modern form of this word," he told her.

"What is it?" Nyota asked.

"It says k'hat'n'dlawa," Spock said, his space-black eyes turning to her. "The modern form is k'diwa."

"Oh," she said, her mouth forming a small circle. "'Beloved.'"

"That is the closest translation Terrans have found," Spock agreed, sitting in his chair next to hers. As he turned to his own work, he saw her eyes still rested on him. When she didn't return to her screen, he obliged her by meeting her eyes again.

"Is there a better translation?" she asked.

Spock wished he could categorize her expression, but he had insufficient data. "It is the term for a Vulcan's bondmate: one who shares thoughts and experiences." He spoke quietly and did not meet her gaze as he tried to encompass the connotations of the small word. "Bondmates are linked in thought but also in emotions and…" He looked at her, searching for the right word. "Have you learned of katra, Nyota?"

She nodded quietly.

"Some say bondmates are joined in katra. The ancient word,k'hat'n'dlawa, means 'half of my soul and heart.'" Nyota watched him with wide eyes. "It is not used anymore because of its emotional connotations."

Nyota dropped her eyes. She wanted so much for him to keep talking, but she dared not push him. They'd covered the whole bondmate thing in third level Vulcan class, of course, but she never thought they truly explained it. She wanted to know how the mental connection worked, what he thought about arranged marriages, wondered, again, about his former bondmate and how he had felt sharing his emotions with her.

"Is—is that why you're so bothered by my being able to feel your emotions?" she realized, speaking the words quietly as though they might not disturb the air as much that way. Hesitantly, she brought her eyes back up to his. "Because that only happens with—"

"The sharing of emotions is deeply personal," he said simply, his voice low and his frame stiff.

Nyota looked down again, thinking that she might actually understand his discomfort finally; understand why he was so bothered by sharing his emotions with his student…

Spock spoke again after a moment, his voice natural; "There the use of 'k'hat'n'dlawa' conveys the connection between the two characters after Tolok's death."

"Did you finish reading it?" Nyota asked curiously.

He nodded. "I finished sixteen days after you began."

"I forgot how quickly you read," she smiled.

"To the contrary," he countered. "For a Vulcan I read relatively slowly."

She just shook her head at him. "Relative to me, you read quickly." Feeling jealous of how much more quickly he'd read the Vulcan document, she asked suddenly, "Do you think in Vulcan, Spock?"

"It depends on my circumstances. When I am with humans, besides you, I usually think in Federation Standard English. But when alone I think in Vulcan still."

"When you meditate?" she asked shyly.

Looking at her with an unfathomable expression, he concurred, "Yes, when I meditate."

Nyota returned to her work, still distracted, to find the word 'k'diwa' still untranslated in her document. "What do you suggest I use for k'diwa?" she asked.

"Beloved. It will be best understood."

Even once she had put it in, Nyota paused over her work. Sighing, she spun her chair again to look at her professor. "Spock," she began, "I know you didn't want to talk about this. But do you know why I could feel your emotions?" She spoke quietly, wishing there was another word she could substitute for 'emotions.' She couldn't read his dark eyes as he looked at her. "Why could I before, but now you've stopped it?"

Spock considered her carefully. He felt vaguely uncomfortable speaking to her of the concept of 'k'diwa' in general terms; he did not relish the thought of discussing their empathetic link. Yet, he felt he owed her something after subjecting her to such an inappropriate, personal ordeal. Would not an explanation help to alleviate some of his guilt?

"I believe it is because I am unbonded," he admitted finally, watching her expression intently. "Vulcan minds…" he began, but stopped, impatient with himself. Ordering his thoughts before he spoke, he finally continued, "As you are aware, Vulcans become bonded at seven. From then on one always has the presence of another, whether acknowledged and predominant or not," he said, thinking of his and T'Pring's distant relationship. "Unbonded Vulcan minds are not as predictable," he explained, his volume dropping. "I was not aware my control would change when I became unbonded." Finally, he looked back up at her. "We do not often speak of such things. Again, I apologize."

Nyota appeared to be deep in thought. "So, your mind," she confirmed, "was, like, projecting, without your awareness?"

"Most likely," he agreed. "I can control it now because I am aware of it."

As she watched him, one question popped into Nyota's mind: why her, and not any of her classmates? She knew none of the rest of them had sensed it. Was it something to do with her, and being able to receive it? Or was it something else? She couldn't make herself ask, because she wasn't sure what the answer would mean. Instead, she asked the next best thing. "Do you know…if all human minds are capable of telepathy with Vulcans?"

Instead of answering directly, Spock replied, "This was not telepathy, Nyota." She thought she heard a sort of bristling in his answer, and a sharpness, as he straightened his back. "You told me it was strictly empathic."

"Empathic, right," she murmured, realizing such a distinction must be so much more important in their culture. Patiently, she waited for him to answer her question, wondering if he'd mention his mother. Was she prying too much?

"I do not know," he finally obliged her. "My mother does have a complete telepathic relationship with my father," he said, clearly uncomfortable.

He did not mention his own experiences with other women.

She didn't ask anymore, but returned to her work silently, still preoccupied with wondering why it had only happened with her…

XXXXX

A/N This chapter—especially their conversation—very much evolved on its own. Please let me know how you liked it. I don't love the beginning of the chapter, but I like how the conversation came out. Have I elaborated enough on the "implications" of the link (PadawanMom asked a great question about it)? At least, the social ones. I will get into the more personal ones later…

For an explanation of katra, which is basically like a soul, but which I didn't feel like going into (partly because both of my characters know the basics), you can explore at /wiki/Katra (for some reason it won't let me actually link you to it)

Hope my US readers had a happy 4th of July weekend =] (and all the rest of you, I hope you had a happy normal weekend!)