(Authors Note: We have a few chapters left, but we are on the road to the end. Keep reading and reviewing and tell your friends. Pass my story/journey along on twitter, livejournal, facebook, tumblr etc.)


The room began to swallow them and she had that weird feeling like when she walked into a church and they expected her to pray. While she should have been at ease she knew what was coming and it hung on the tip of her tongue creating a bad taste in her mouth. The way she felt inside was as if paranoia was bubbling under the surface like an omen. She spoke with Nolan who she thought would be able to calm her nerves but in the long run it only made her more anxious, like she was leaving something behind.

"I froze…"

"You didn't freeze; you just didn't know what to say. There's a difference…" Nolan said as he tried to comfort his confidante. "You know what is freezing? This room."

Amanda shivered and stepped closer to him, repairing the damage through physical affection. "I know what you mean…"

Lips curling up Nolan grinned and wrapped his arm around her, the two looking at stolen artwork to pass the time. "We've been through a hell of a lot, haven't we?" he said rhetorically.

"I hear what you're saying…" she smirked as she looked into his piercing blue eyes that could illuminate a room. The way she said it was almost as if she had made it through sensitivity training.

"We should get our gear on… we get to go all NYPD blue with these bulletproof vests…" he said as he pointed to them across the room on a desk chair.

Looking at the bulky life-saving contraptions she had tunnel vision before looking back to the taller blonde man before her. "I don't want you in the field…" she said honestly. "You could get hurt."

"What about you?" he asked cocking his head. "You think I want you in there? I'm coming and I'll see you safely home like birds of a feather would be."

"Alright…let's get dressed…" she said as they approached the chair.

"Time to get all dolled up…" he murmured as he lifted the vests off the office chair. Amanda took them both from his hand and set them on the ground. "What are you doing?" Nolan asked as he watched her hands.

"There's something I have to do first…" she said as she pulled him into her. Kissing him slowly she let her mouth meld to his as she let almost coerced him into sinking into the office chair with a broken wheel. She straddled him to keep up appearances before standing in front of him. Amanda Clarke kept kissing him and before he knew it he was handcuffed to the chair.

"What the hell Ems?" he asked as he struggled against the restraints. "If you wanted bondage fun all you had to do was ask…"

"You're not coming with me Nolan, I want you to live…even if I'm gone you need to keep up that immortal status of yours…" she murmured as she watched him struggle and writhe.

"This isn't funny Amanda, let me go…" he whined as he pulled and tugged the metal cold against his wrists.

"Nolan, don't make it harder than it already is…" she said, her voice cracking.

"It doesn't have to be this way, let me fight by your side…I'm the Batman to your Robin, the Bonnie to your Clyde…the…"

"Stop," she said as she felt tears rim her eyes. She felt like she had been crying so much lately but this hurt the most. She wasn't sure if she would see Nolan Ross again and she knew that he thinking the same thing. She knew he'd probably die of a broken heart if she was killed so that was motivation to stay alive.

"I can't…" he pouted as he watched her face change.

"When it's the end of the day and I have to choose… you're the one I want by my side Nolan."

Nolan nodded, wishing he could reach for her.

"Just not this time…"

Turning on her heels she listened to him move against the chair, the metal clanking. He called out her name and she could hear him with the door closed and all the way down the hallway. His desperation was just as heartbreaking as her need for revenge.


She remembered the words of wisdom Satoshi Takeda had taught her, she remembered advice from Nolan and wishes from her father from very early on. She remembered what her mother had said when they were reunited and she remembered the one time she had met Steve Buscemi in the street and he called her a very bright girl. All these things had led to this, all these moments, and now here she was fighting a war bigger than herself.

Lambs heading out either to pasture or to slaughter she piled in with the crew including her Aunt and her exotic lover who was mixed ethnicities and had traveled quite a lot in his time. Taryn Clarke exchanged the orders taking charge like a true military woman but the rest of the ride to the building was full of blank stares, empty faces and tribal chants from people who clearly had a military background. Some of the soldiers were former marines, some were former cops, there were a few firefighters thrown into the mix and ex-militia. Each person was his or her own, they all told a story.

Amanda liked stories as a young girl, David would tell her the very best ones but this story, her life she didn't want to tell her children if she ever had any, but that was unlikely. After everything the idea of raising a child and settling down just didn't appeal to her. She didn't know what appealed to her though because she never really thought about life after her Revengenda was completed. She had always seen it as long term and part of her wanted to keep it going forever just so she didn't get depressed when she felt like she had no purpose. Nolan told her she could go to school again after, pick a major and he'd help her out but she didn't know what interested her anymore and she was already educated enough. Her streets smarts held more for her than her scholarly knowledge anyway.

He said "Work a full time job" and she scoffed knowing she would find it all very dull. She needed a passion and she hoped one day, if she was given a "one day" that she would find out what it was.

Getting out of the truck she felt light in the wind like a stray piece of loose leaf paper and there was this sinking feeling like a shadow was covering the building like a blanket. A dark cloud hung and she waited for the rain. The swat team raided the building but she was told to keep back. There was only so much she could do with the kind of training she had. While she had trained to fight and take people down with Takeda, this was much different. This was something she could not do.

Nolan used to call her the perfect person. He knew she was fucked up in the head but he thought she balanced everything pretty well or at least acted like she did. In 2002 not so much but she had had some time to figure it all out and put on a good show that resembled sanity.

Clock ticking she went with a group of people not including Taryn and Ajat. They were the lead-ins and didn't have time to stick behind with her. Family didn't mean you had to slow down. She understood that best of all, the mission before anything else.

Heading into the building just as raindrops began to fall she kept her eyes peeled and her gun at arm's length, ready to fire at any given moment. She felt like she was with the CIA and she wouldn't have been surprised if someone came out saying they used to work for the Central Intelligence Agency at some point in their lives. It would also put her mind at ease as the thought of having someone on the team who knew how to properly take out a large group of high level threats.


Nolan struggled in his chair as he prayed for a god to bless him with hulk like powers and abilities. He needed to hulk out of the chair to get to Amanda who needed his help. He was on tech and wished he could be on coms with everyone else in order to relay messages and shut down security systems. They all had blueprints of the building but he was scared that the wiring was off and they would need his assistance with underlying arch's.

Arch's was what he called a large grouping of wirings that were undetected by electronic forces even though they were there and only he knew how to find and tap into them. He didn't want people seeing Amanda Clarke and co. on an undetected force field because it would have meant that they had the upper hand.

Looking around the room for a way out or a way to contact someone else to help him Nolan spotted a stray blackberry on someone's desk. Inching over with his chair, using his legs and hips to move the broken thing to where he wanted it, he turned around and used the wire strip at the end of his cuffs to knock the blackberry off the desk but it fell to the floor instead of his hands.

Fuck.

Using his body to parallel him to the floor in the right position that happened to be on his knees he bent backwards to dial Jack's number, the only number of his friends from The Hamptons he really knew by heart.

"Hello?"

"Jack it's me…"

"Nolan? Whose number are you calling from? Where are you?"

"I'm in Chicago…I need you to call a friend, I'm in a bit of a sticky situation…" he said on speakerphone as his leg began to throb, the one he had broken and his arms felt sore.

"Shoot…who am I calling?"

"His name's Robert Amnell and he's an old fling…he lives in Chicago so he might be a bit bitter because of our last session but tell him it's a 911 for sure…his number's at my place. There's a key under the mat in the back near the dolphin statue and his phone number is in my little purple book by the fruit bowl in the kitchen. My address is 361 Old Newlins Street in Rockwell Crossing. I'm in; I think the room number is five but it could also be fifty five. "

"Got it…" Jack said, leaving the bar to bull as he hurried out the door with his keys, knowing this was urgent from the desperate pleading sound in Nolan's voice.

"You're a champ. Thanks man…" Nolan hung up the phone and so did Jack. Now it was just a waiting game.


She waited and it dawned on her that she had no control over the situation. Making her way through an ocean of bodies and blood splattered rugs and walls she nearly vomited. She had never seen so much quick carnage in such a small location before. Hallways were strewn with bodies and her ears had gone deaf from the heavy sound of bullets whizzing past her head. Getting grazed by a bullet she looked to see if anyone was defending her from the stream of bullets but she was alone, her group had gone ahead and lost track of her.

She didn't mind this. While she didn't feel safe, she felt like she was being punished for all her sins and the punishment felt good. It felt the same to those who needed to be spanked if they were feeling bad. It was a good release and this was thrilling.

Reloading her gun she shot the man firing at her but the bullets either embedded themselves into the walls or bounced off of them. Most of the wall would crumble when hit and she made note of their shoddy craftsmanship.

Shooting again she took the man down, another one for her hit list but before she could turn around she felt a stinging sensation in her back and her ears were ringing from the sound of the gun. All she could feel was the pain and her finger on the trigger as she fell to her knees. Letting her mind register what had happened she took a split second before spinning on the ground, falling on her back which was a big mistake, and shooting the mobster with the big Mario mustache.

Watching him fall like a beached whale but looking more like a Walrus with that mustache she forced herself to get on her knees because lying on her back was excruciating. Feeling blood mat the small of her back she sighed.

Great, another scar.


Nolan took a breath as he watched the door open and he hoped it was Robert Amnell, the familiar face he once made wince in pain and smirk in pleasure. It was.

Thank the big man upstairs.

"Robbie…" he said as the man rushed over to him. He had aged, but then again they both had. Robert's face always reminded him of a little possum only cute and not rat-like. His features were very narrow and his eyes were so dark they were like raisins that were out in the sun for too long.

"Nolan, what the hell are you doing here?" he asked as he helped get him out of the cuffs. It wasn't the first time.

"Getting some deep dish pizza, what do you think?" he asked with a smart ass remark. He didn't have time to explain but he also didn't realize he was being rude to an old friend that he had no right to be rude to in the first place since he broke it off with him.

"I can't stand the snark right now Nolan, I don't see you for 8 years and then you pull this crap? Let me guess, it has to do with that mystery woman you always were so gaga for…" he said more than asked.

Things had never worked out romantically with Nolan because of Amanda Clarke being in his life. He was always so hung up on her that it couldn't work for him and anybody else. The same thing happened with Mary Louise Bourne.

"It's about Amanda…yes…" he said as he watched Robert perk up, the man did recognize the name after all.

"How can I help?" he asked, not wanting to free the man and then just leave.

Nolan looked in his pocket and realized that Amanda had swiped his personal Nolpad which was a new generation and everything. "Sneaky little fox…" he purred to himself as he looked to see that Robert was carrying a messenger bag. "Why don't you let the cat out of the bag just this once…" Nolan murmured, needing the computer he knew was in it.

If Nolan couldn't be in the field he needed to help shut down the security archs and at least triangulate Amanda's location so he could find her. He knew the building obviously but where in the building was a whole different story. He was just lucky she didn't find the tracker he had put in her jade necklace that Satoshi had given her as a graduating present. Even though the two were no longer friends, she still often wore the necklace for good luck and as a reminder that she could kick some ass.

She could and she would kick some ass.