Greener on the other side

by NihilisticAmbition313

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy 7. I do this only for entertainment purposes. I do not make a dime from this.

--

Chapter #30-"The elastic girl"

"I knew that was her." said Jessica from before the computer in she and Kellen's home.

"Krysten Kier, marksman extraordinaire." said Kellen.

Jessica, still reeling from her collision with Krysten earlier, decided to log on and see if he woman she'd literally ran into was who she suspected. Jessica was right, and managed to unearth an entire page dedicated to the daughter of Vincent Valentine, courtesy of the Junon Herald.

"Look. It even says she has a habit of spacing out and running into objects and people. How unbefitting of a great marksman."

"You said it, Miss J...Can't argue with her abilities, though."

"I can argue with her hair. Did someone tell her those braids were cute? If so, they lied."

"Well, they are sorta cute." Kellen sheepishly admitted.

"...You would say that, Kellen. Anyway, it says here that her skills are rumored to be attributable to powers that aren't compatible with human capability...Kellen, for the win, what does this mean?"

"She's a Neo-Cetra." The younger Heidegger replied.

"Excellent, Kellen."

"Or is it? That makes three that we know of now, not including yourself."

"The termites keep on coming out the woodwork, my friend..."

Krysten Kier...Now there are four: you, myself, Andie Chiefstone, and that guy.

"Kellen, my man, it looks like Project GARDEN was a bigger success than Shin-Ra ever anticipated."

"Or ever even wanted."

"Heh heh."

"What do we do now?"

"We wait. The question isn't whether or not the true Holy is in Tifa's possession, not anymore. The question now is, when will the chance to take it present itself?"

"And how?"

"I already know how, Kellen. We're going to enlist the aid of someone very close to Tifa. You know Yuffie Kisaragi, right?"

"How could I forget? She wouldn't tip me for delivering those flowers."

"Kellen, you need to get over that. Focus here."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Listen, she may be a tightwad, but the girl is a master thief. If anybody can swipe the Holy from Tifa and get away with it, it's her. All we have to do is speak to her in her language."

"But, we don't know Wutainese."

Jessica could only fix Kellen with an incredulous glare.

"...Kellen, I meant the language of gil. Money, bread, scratch, duckets."

"Oh, oh...I-I knew that."

"You did not." Jessica grumbled, closing out the web browser to reveal her desktop background.

"You're still using that wallpaper?" Kellen inquired.

"Yeah...So?"

"I just thought you'd moved past that part of your life."

"...I like to stay motivated."

Jessica, the woman Kellen affectionately called Miss J, stared purposefully at the desktop background. It was a photograph of herself, Biggs, Wedge, and Barret in front of the old Seventh Heaven, taken shortly after they'd made the place their headquarters. "The happier times", as she called them.

Those days were long gone, as were Biggs and Wedge. They did not share Jessica's unbelievable good fortune. They died, as they were intended. Only she survived. She, and...

That one-armed bastard...Why did you live? Why did Biggs and Wedge have to...It's fine, though. Once I take control of the true Holy materia, you'll get yours. You all will. Reno, Rude, Rufus...All of you motherfuckers...

"...Where's my PHS?"

"It's right there." Kellen pointed.

"Oh." Jessica uttered as she picked up the phone from the side of the monitor.

"Who are you calling?"

"Yuffie."

"Now? I thought we were gonna wait."

"I can't wait. I want that materia now."

--

Back in her humble bachelorette pad, Yuffie was contemplating her plan to relieve Tifa of the true Holy materia when the custom ring tone of her PHS (Ode To Joy) sounded off.

"Who the heck could that be?" Yuffie asked aloud as she leapt from her computer desk to retrieve the phone from her bed.

On the LCD screed was a number she did not recognize, but that did not stop her from answering...

"Hello?"

"...Yuffie Kisaragi?"

"Umm...May I ask who this is?"

"A potential employer." said a serious sounding woman.

"Eh? An employer?"

"I have a job for you, Ms. Kisaragi."

"...Who the heck are you? How did you get my num--"

"We'll discuss that later. Listen, I need something that is currently being held by someone else. I heard you were good. I have money, and lots of it."

"Oh, ho, ho. You heard right, my friend." Yuffie responded, seamlessly shifting into business mode.

"Good. Sounds like you're my woman."

"I'll bet...But, do I even get a hint as to who you are?"

"...Butter flowers." The lady replied.

"Butter flowers? What kind of hint is that?"

"The only one you get. Now, let's talk business."

"Sure thing." Yuffie agreed, dismissing the caller's hint altogether. "What, and from whom?"

"A very important artifact, Ms.Kisaragi. You ever heard of the true Holy materia?"

"...Yeah, I've heard of it." Yuffie answered, shifting uncomfortably on the edge of the bed.

"Tifa Strife has it. I want it. Twenty-thousand gil is reasonable, no?"

"...Who is this? Is this Andie?"

"No, I'm not Andie. Ms. Kisaragi, do you want the damn job or not?"

"Uh...T-Twenty-thousand, you say?"

"You're twisting my arm. Fine. Forty-thousand."

"F-Forty..."

"Okay, sixty. But that's as high as I'll go."

The sound of "sixty" almost made Yuffie faint right onto a pillow, but, she managed to keep it together somehow.

Sixty-thousand gil was a killing compared to a measly four-thousand, but, Yuffie remembered very clearly who offered the paltry sum. Krysten's words rang in her ears still, and the fear that she had instilled was quite pungent. Krysten was crystal clear that Yuffie's betrayal would not be tolerated...

Then again, Krysten and I only made a verbal agreement. A verbal contract is not binding when no moneys have changed hands nor labors been fulfilled...Sixty-thou' beats the shit outta four any day...

"...I'll have to think about it." was Yuffie's answer at last.

"You get one day." The woman told her in stern fashion.

"I got your number."

"I expect your answer tomorrow."

Before Yuffie could bid parting, the woman hung up.

"...Dammit." Yuffie sighed as she flopped backward onto the mattress. "...Sixty-thousand bucks, all to myself. I could do whatever I wanted with that kind of bread...But, Krysten makes a strong argument against screwing her over...then there's Tifa."

As much as she did not want to admit it to herself, Yuffie was having second thoughts about stealing Tifa's necklace. Although she was still angry with her, Yuffie really did not want to do something so deliberately mean spirited to Tifa, and to Cloud for that matter, by virtue of the necklace being his gift to his wife.

The thought of being pulled in three different directions all at once made Yuffie restless, so much that she needed to go out for a walk and a rare cigarette. Fortunately, she still had the same pack from last week.

Cid would cuss me out for hanging on to a pack of smokes for this long. Heh heh...

The afternoon sun was still shining down brightly as Yuffie emerged from her apartment building. Having no particular place to go in mind, she let her flip-flop clad feet drift aimlessly down the sidewalk while she casually puffed on a menthol. After several minutes of wandering, her PHS ring tone sounded off once again. This time, she recognized the number on the LCD display...

"Vinnie?" Yuffie answered, thinking it was the newest father in town.

"Nope. Guess again."

"...Andie."

"Correct. Yuffie, do you remember when I said I'd be in touch if I needed something?"

"You never said that."

"Um, I seem to recall saying maybe I'd bump into you again someday. Wink, wink."

"Ohhh, right...So, you want that favor back."

"Yes."

"Well, everybody's enlisting my services today anyway. What did you need?"

"I need to see you first. Where are you?"

"I'm actually a few blocks from your dad's."

Yuffie gave Andie her specific location, and agreed to wait there for her to arrive.

Great...Now what?