A: Thanks so much and yes, at least that's a step forwards. It isn't, but I'm sure she'll get better eventually. Iain will definitely need some support. Thank you for reviewing.
Bluebell140: Me too and let's keep our fingers crossed for her. Thanks for reviewing.
ChloeNaomiTokyo: Thank you, and I'm glad you think so. I do have some experience with anxiety/self esteem problems unfortunately, which is why I include a lot of it in my writing. I know how awful it is to go through. You should definitely give it a go. My advice is to start with your favourite characters and a topic that you know loads about. Also, maybe start off with a storyline that's already happened and add your own plot into it as a starting point. If you ever make an account, just PM me and I'd be happy to help out. Writing Fanfiction is so much fun though so I definitely recommend giving it a go. Also, it's great therapy :-)
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Although Lily didn't really want visitors, she was secretly pleased when Robyn came to see her.
When Lily first joined the ED, she and Robyn did not get off to a good start. Robyn was a shy, kind and happy nurse who loved her job, and Lily was completely the opposite and wasn't afraid to tell her that she was lacking professionalism. As the two grew used to each other though, they actually ended up being good friends, so it wasn't surprising when Robyn became upset by Lily's situation.
"Everyone misses you," Robyn said, as she sat in the uncomfortable armchair at Lily's bedside. "Even Louise and that's saying something."
Lily managed a small smile, too focused on the drip that she'd been hooked up to. Just the thought of disgusting, fat liquid entering her body made her feel sick, and she couldn't help but hate Connie and Iain for making the decision.
"Iain won't stop talking about the wedding," Robyn then said. "He's so excited, bless him. We're all looking after him, especially Sam. She's been great."
"Sam?" Lily frowned in confusion and turned her head towards Robyn.
"Yes. Sam Nicholls," Robyn said. "Hasn't Iain told you about the new paramedic? She used to be a doctor here, years ago, but she's a paramedic now."
"And does Iain like her?" Lily asked.
"I should hope so," Robyn laughed. "The two of them do have history."
Lily snapped her head towards Robyn and asked, "Sorry?"
"Oh, Lily, it was years ago," Robyn said, suddenly realising what she'd just said. "Trust me, the two of them are just friends now. Sam's really nice and she knows that you and Iain are engaged. Do you remember her?"
"I remember her," Lily replied in a quiet voice.
Of course she remembered her. Sam was blonde, skinny, pretty. It was hard not to remember her to be honest. Lily hated to think of the two of them, getting cosy in the ambulance whilst chatting and blasting music as loud as they could. She couldn't remember the last time that she'd made Iain laugh, every time he looked at her he just seemed sad. Sam wouldn't make him feel like that.
"If I ask you something, can we keep it just between us?" Lily whispered.
"Of course," Robyn promised. "What's wrong?"
"Do..." Lily gulped and dug her nails into her legs. "Do you think Iain will get bored of me?"
"What?" Robyn frowned, and she actually began laughing. "Have you not seen the way that he looks at you Lily, and did you not listen to anything that I said? He loves you. You're like the best thing that's ever happened to him."
"But I...I hate myself," Lily whispered. "I'm ugly."
Robyn flinched and shifted uncomfortably, upon hearing Lily say that about myself.
"You're not," she whispered back and shook her head.
"I think I am," Lily said and hung her head. "Sam's beautiful and...She's always up for a laugh. She doesn't put her job before her friends, and you said that Iain had dated her once before. She's working with him, Robyn, whilst I'm stuck in here, hooked up to this stupid drip that I don't even want!"
Robyn jumped slightly, as Lily made an attempt to pull the wires out of her arm. She soon stopped though and just allowed her body to collapse back against the many pillows that were surrounding her.
"You will get out of here, Lily," Robyn said, although she seemed unsure.
Apart from Lily's doctor, Iain was the next person to visit her.
"I bought flowers for you," Iain said, as he neatly arranged them in the vase that stood on the bedside table. "Lilies, well, because of the obvious really. How are you feeling?"
"You shouldn't get flowers for women, you know?" Lily whispered, as she sat and stared blankly at the door in front of her. "They just die, and then no one's is really happy anymore."
Iain didn't know what to make of that statement. It was morbid and out of character for Lily.
"When was the last time I made you laugh, Iain?" She then asked, lifting her head to look him in the eyes. Iain just looked completely confused by her question though. "Okay, I'll change the question. When was the last time you laughed?"
"Uh-Let me think," Iain said, drumming his fingers against the bars of Lily's bed. "Oh yeah, it was this morning. I arrived at the ambulance station and Sa..."
He stopped himself from finishing Sam's name and exhaled deeply.
"Sam," Lily finished for him. "She made you laugh. Robyn told me that she was back, as a paramedic."
"Look," Iain sighed. "There is nothing going on between Sam and I, alright?"
"I didn't say that there was," Lily said. "I'm giving you a get out of jail free card, Iain. No resentment. No fault. Just a choice."
The next person to visit was Connie, and shortly after that Lily received her forth visitor.
Sam.
She had to admit that she was surprised and slightly uncomfortable, when she walked into the room. Connie was in the middle of checking her blood pressure, but she took Sam's visit as an opportunity to go and grab a coffee.
"What are you doing here?" Lily asked.
She didn't mean to sound snappy. It just happened.
"I thought I'd come and see how you are," Sam said, hovering by the bed whilst she scanned the hospital room. "Iain's been keeping me updated."
"Don't talk to me as if you know me that well, because you don't," Lily sighed, adjusting the jacket that had slowly slid off of her shoulders. "We may have worked together in the past but that's all we'll ever be, old colleagues."
"Lily, I know you're angry with the world right now but..."
"I'm not," Lily defended. "I just don't understand why you're here."
"I already told you," Sam said, and helped herself to the chair. "I came to see how you are. Iain...Um...He told me about the conversation that the two of you had together. Do you want to know why I rejected Iain?"
"Not really," Lily muttered under her breath.
"I'm going to tell you anyway," Sam said. "It wasn't just because I didn't love him, but because deep down I knew that he was only attached to me because of our time in Afghanistan. Don't reject him, Lily. He loves you so so much. Every time we're on shift, he will constantly update me on your progress and talk to me about you, and the other day he told me how excited he was to marry you."
"He really said that?" Lily asked.
"He did," Sam said. "I know that, as women, we've all experienced some sort of self esteem issue in our life, but I need you to believe me when I say that Iain loves you and thinks that you are the most beautiful woman on this planet. Iain and I have had history and yes, we're good friends, but I see him more like a brother."
"Don't let Gem hear you say that," Lily laughed. "She'd scratch your eyes out! Her and Iain are incredibly close."
"Gem?" Sam questioned. "Who's Gem?"
"Iain's little sister," Lily said, confused at the fact that Iain had never mentioned her to Sam before. "They've got a lovely relationship."
"Well, I think that proves that Iain never truly saw me as a serious romantic prospect," Sam said. "He would never talk to me about his family. It was off limits."
Lily just shrugged her shoulders. She was too tired to even attempt to speak to anyone else. She didn't have as much energy as she used to.
"I would really like us to be friends, Lily," Sam said. "If you're okay with that?"
"Yeah," Lily sighed and gave her a nod. "I'm sorry. I'm just..."
"I know," Sam interrupted her. "I'm going to head off now, okay? I have to get back to work and you probably want some sleep."
"Not so sure about that," Lily false laughed. "I would like some sleep, but I've just been struggling to get some lately."
"Just try your best, alright?" Sam said. "Ask Connie for some sleeping aid if not. I'm sure Iain will be up again later anyway. Take care of yourself, okay?"
"Yeah," Lily whispered, managing a weak and weary smile. "Thanks Sam."
