Okay, well I'm not an Elliot's fan, and even less an O/E one. I'm pretty sure you'll see from this chapter ! lol
This one is def on my top 5 fav chapter. I cross my fingers it'll have the same impact on you.
Special note:
- to my faithful readers & reviewers: thank you so much for sticking with this story from the beginning ;
- and special hug to CNovak929: first for pushing me to post this story when I didn't trust my writing at all anymore, and second for reviewing every chapter added while you were away (you missed chapter 24 btw ... lol)
Now as for bringing the squad in, honestly I didn't. A tiny mention of why is in this chapter (don't blink you might miss it! lol ... ok poor humor I officially read Lucy Lawless's blog way too much these days :p).
I did for Liz Donnelly because I'm an abs fan of her character and of Judith Light ; Don Cragen because, although I'm not fond of his character in the show, he is 'useful' in my story ; Munch is mentioned in a previous chapter. Funny that, as much as I dislike his character in the show, Elliot is on the most, but well his fans might kick my ass after reading this... lol
Next chapter will be what everyone might be waiting for!!
Disclaimer: see chapter 1.
New York Mercy Hospital
11 August - 7:18 am
She didn't realize she had drifted off to sleep until Casey's weak voice woke her up.
Puzzled, she opened her eyes to see her trying to sit up in bed.
- "Elliot?", she whimpered.
- "Casey? What is it?", Olivia asked, frowning at the young woman sudden agitation.
- "Elliot…I saw…him", she replied between laboured breathing.
She didn't need to turn around to know Casey imagined it.
- "Casey, Elliot is not here", she replied, squeezing her hand
"You want to see him?", she questioned, although it wasn't likely.
Casey's painful chuckle proved her she was right.
- "No", she gulped some air in her aching body "I made enough….enough damage to burn in hell a lifetime".
- "You didn't!", exclaimed Olivia, surprised by Casey's speech.
- "Com'on O …", she stopped, trying to catch her breath "Ol… Liv", she smiled at her "I broke a…ten years fr…. friendship", she articulated, tears welling up in her eyes.
- "Six… besides it wasn't really a friendship as strong as I thought", she retorted.
- "Liv…", she began before being interrupted by a long coughing fit.
- "Casey, stop talking. Please? You only aggravate your breathing. The Doctor ordered you full rest", she pleaded as she sat on the mattress.
Grabbing the abandoned oxygen mask, she placed it over Casey's mouth before raising the bed to a more upright position.
It didn't take long before the exhausted woman went back to sleep. As soon as her breathing turned deep and even, Olivia lowered the bed back down.
She just stayed there, her warm hand cradled in hers, caressing her cheek with the back of her fingers.
Last night, she felt her getting up and asked her if she needed anything, but Casey assured her that everything was fine, she just needed a glass of cold water. Olivia was just dozing back off when she heard a dull noise coming from the living room. Rushing towards it, she found her passed out on the floor, her breathing laboured, dripped with sweat.
The doctor warned them about this, and since her immune system was rather low, she preferred to take no risk and called an ambulance.
They will keep her in observation for the next couple hours before sending her home for the week-end. And on Monday she will be back for her radiotherapy session.
Olivia sighed deeply, she was tired. Not especially physically but emotionally.
She didn't get used to see Casey so weak. And last night wake up call was certainly not what she would have chosen.
Radio therapy sessions were scheduled three times a week, and went for the last two months. She was down for 48 hours and barely back on her feet to go through an other session. She didn't know how she supported it.
Although she knew that she had no memories of it. In her deep exhausted state, she could only manage enough strength to go from home to the hospital, and back. In between, Olivia knew everything was blind. This wasn't a bad thing. For Casey at least. For her, it was a little difficult to handle at time. But they were halfway into the sessions and the Doctor told them that from now till the end of them, Casey's body would have growing difficulties to accept the treatment. Which meant she'd get worse. Which meant that what happened last night was likely to happen again.
And Olivia wasn't sure she could handle it all.
A strong scent filled the air. A scent she'd have recognised among dozens. A scent she was used to recognize after years of partnership, of shared stakeouts.
- "What are you doing here?", she growled, not turning around.
At first she got no response, then she heard light footstep enter the room.
- "See how you are…", Detective Stabler began.
- "Like you cared…go out Stabler!", she half shouted, stopping herself before waking Casey up.
- "Olivia, I'm sorry", he whispered but once more she interrupted him, this time facing him.
- "You have nothing to do here Stabler. Now leave".
- "Liv…"
- "Detective Benson."
- "Listen, I'm sorry, I was out of the line when I told you …"
- "When you told me..."you doing girls now?" Aren't those your exact words? That I was fucking her because I couldn't get over you? Grow up Stabler, get your head out of your own ass", she finished in an icy voice.
- "I'm sorry, I was angry. I shouldn't have said that"
- "You're damn right Stabler. All I ever did was take care of her"
- "I thought she was manipulating you", he admitted shamely.
- "Excuse me??", her voice raising again.
- "I thought she was playing sick to turn you away from me", he admitted.
Speechless, Olivia turned her attention to Casey who was getting restless in bed, whimpering softly. No doubt disturbed by their altercation.
- "Like she would make up something like that", she whispered softly.
- "Olivia, I'm so sorry", he pleaded but she didn't turn around to face him, all her being focused on Casey.
Her hand rose to caress her cheek, the other grabbing her hand just a tad tighter.
- "Shh Case, it's okay, you are just dreaming. Everything's fine."
She smiled when Casey' hand, the one resting by her head on the pillow, grabbed hers and nuzzled it with her cheek. Then she caught it between the pillow and her cheek.
- "You can't stay here"
- "Olivia..."
- "How did you know we were here?"
- "I went to Casey's place and found it empty. The neighbor told me what happened last night"
- "And you thought you had any right to come here?", she laughed bitterly.
- "Olivia, I was worried about you"
- "Mrs Anderson tells you Casey was taken here in an ambulance, and you worry about me? Knock it out Stabler, you never cared about anyone but yourself"
- "That's not true!"
- "And what were you doing there in the first place? I thought I had been clear when asking everyone from the precinct to step back. It was Casey's wish."
- "She really has you wrapped around her little finger", he scowled.
Olivia didn't think, didn't think of the consequences her outburst would have on Casey, she just acted on Elliot's statement.
Jumping on her feet, she grabbed him by the collar and shoved him out of the room. He smashed in the corridor, against the opposite wall, with a loud "bam".
- "How dare you? How dare you speak about her like that?!", she yelled in his face.
- "See, I was right finally, it only takes someone to talk the wrong way about her and you turn crazy. Told you Liv, that girl have you wrapped up around her little finger."
- "Like you knew anything about what's going on here. Tell me Stabler, have any friend around who would dare ask you anything like that?"
- "She asked you only because she had noone to turn to! She's so arrogant; she drove everyone away from her. But she's so good at playing the victim!"
- "How the fuck would you know? How do you know anything about her past?"
- "No need to know anything Liv, situation speaks for itself: you are here but not her family", he said triumphally.
- "Her family is only a phone call away Stabler, but she prefers to have me around during what she's going through. It's that simple. Her family would be here in a flash if she asked them to"
- "You sure about that?", he smirked.
- "As sure as I once thought we were friends Stabler", now she was the one smirking. From the look in his eyes, she hit a nerve.
Their quarel was interrupted by someone they both had forgotten for a moment, although she was the center of their argument: Casey.
A hand on the doorknob to keep her balance, she was standing a foot away from them, her eyes watery and her breath short. She hadn't missed a word from their argument and it saddened her. Olivia never told her the reason of their quarel and now she understood why. She never thought Elliot Stabler would make such accusation towards her, and towards herself.
- "Elliot", she whispered, taking a tentative step forward.
- "Casey!", Olivia exclaimed reaching her as soon as her eyes fell on her.
"You shouldn't be up, go back to bed", she advised sternly.
- "No", Casey protested weakly "I have something to say first".
She took an other step forward but Olivia didn't trust her body to support her long so she looped an arm around her waist. Ready to carry her back to bed if necessary.
Locking eyes a split second, Casey took in Olivia the support she needed. She knew she would be there to catch her.
Nodding, she laid her hand over Olivia's one who was resting on her belly, squeezing it softly. Letting her know she was accepting her support.
When she spoke, her eyes held a determination Olivia rarely saw these days.
The resolve she had in Court not so long ago when a defendant would go a little too far.
- "Elliot, I understand you…are angry but if you have...to", she coughed before gulping some air in "to be angry at someone, let it be me. She is here because I asked her to", she breathed before sagging some more against Olivia.
- "Casey", Olivia warned her, seeing her strength weakening.
- "You are right, my family should be...here but...it's my choice. Olivia...she gave me more than my family ever could: she gave me the courage to fight, she showed...m...me that my life was worth it. And by doing this...she...she is not only my closest friend, but my sister, my mother, I'm lucky to have her as my best friend. And don't think I don't realize the sacrifices…she's making by being here. Because…I know each and every of them", she admitted in a low voice.
- "Sweetheart, you should go back to bed, you are tiring yourself over nothing".
- "Liv, it is not nothing, it's your life".
- "My professional life", she corrected. "There are more important things outside it".
- "No Olivia, because soon you'll be back to it".
Next to them, clasps rang out. Both women turned puzzled looks towards Elliot Stabler who just stood there a smirk on his lips, applauding them.
- "Isn't it touching", he sneered.
"You know Mrs Anderson has her doubt about the two of you and I can't blame her, the lady might be short-sighted but she can certainly see".
- "Mrs Anderson although thinks little green men are out there to get her", Casey retorted.
- "Doesn't mean she's wrong", he added.
- "You have been in SVU far too long. Not everything is about sex in this life", Olivia said icily.
- "Not in the city, but between the two of you, I wouldn't bet my pay check"
Shutting her eyes tight, Casey breathed slowly, this conversation taking a lot of her, she although felt dizzy and nausea wasn't far away.
Squeezing Olivia's hand, she gave her the signal that it was time for her to go back to bed.
Feeling it, Olivia squeezed her tight against her, before turning on her heels slowly.
- "Believe whatever you want Stabler", Olivia stated sharply "I never want to see you again. Ever", she said over her shoulder.
She was glad that, eventhough they insisted that she wore a camisole instead of her top, the doctors left Casey in her pyjamas pants.
No way would she have allowed Stabler to get a full view of her naked form.
As they reached it, she helped Casey to lay back on the bed, a hand behind her back, the other behind her bent legs. Then she moved to tug her in.
Looking down, she saw tears running down her pale cheeks, incredulity and fear written in the depth of her green eyes.
Elliot's words hit her hard, more than they hit herself. He already accused her of the same thing, that's why she didn't tell Casey anything about it.
She knew it would hit her hard.
And it did.
Maybe if she hadn't let Stabler get under her skin and rub her the wrong way, Casey would not have woken up.
She'd have avoided her this pain.
Gritting her teeth, she resisted the urge to smack his face, it would be of no use, all he could think of, all that mattered to him was them being romantically involved. She honestly didn't understand his obsession with it, especially since it wasn't true.
But she decided that instant that it concerned him only. He could believe all he wanted, they weren't involved, end of the story.
- "It will be difficult when you come back to the squad", he replied triumphal.
- "Who said I am?", she responded.
- "What the fuck?", he shouted "You assured Cragen you would be back!"
- "Some things change Stabler, people change."
- "Liv?", came Casey soft voice.
Sitting on the mattress, Olivia gave her a small peck on the forehead before caressing her cheek with the back on her hand.
- "Shhh, you go back to sleep now.", she instructed, smiling.
- "Liv, you…you can't…", she pleaded through renewed tears.
Taking a deep breath, Olivia readied herself to face Casey.
When she responded to Elliot's question, she did it without thinking.
Indeed she had thought about not coming back to SVU for a couple weeks, but never talked to anyone about it, especially not Casey.
She wanted to think things over once all this was over. Now was a little too soon.
Besides, she didn't want Casey to blame herself for her decision. Which she probably already was.
But the explanation would wait a couple hours more. As she looked up, she was pleased to see that the younger woman had fallen back asleep.
- "She is such a comedian", Elliot sneered behind her. "How convenient to fake sleep when about to face the result of her manipulations"
He was standing at the threshold, smirking.
Rising from the bed, she walked towards him, a deadly glare on her face. She saw him flinch, a hint of fear crossing his features.
When she reached him, she gave him the gentlest smile before slamming the door in his face.
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