Have We Been Here Before?
Chapter Thirty-Four - I Must Talk With You
Enterprise
Late April 2269
Kurik
It had become their custom, this past month, no matter what they did in the evening, that it always ended with him in her quarters, holding her body close against his. They had not progressed beyond holding and kissing, for he did not wish to push her, and he was not sure what was acceptable, but the holding and kissing was far beyond his expectations. He found however, as the days passed, that he wanted more, much more. It was time for some serious talk.
When he escorted her back from the rec room, after the latest bridge game, they were no sooner inside her quarters with the door shut than she was against him, her face against his neck. She nuzzled there, turning his nerves to flame. When she nipped at his skin with her teeth, he hissed at her, and her soft laughter melted his reserves. "Christine, there are things we must talk about."
She wound her arms about him, pressing close. Her voice was soft and low, full of something that took his breath away. "Talk, then."
"Not tonight. It is late, and you need your rest so that you may function properly tomorrow."
"Always worrying about me, aren't you?"
"Yes. I cannot deny this." His lips brushed across her forehead, and she sighed, so very softly. "Perhaps tomorrow evening, after end-meal?"
"Yes, that's fine. What is it that is so important, Kurik?"
"Tomorrow. Now it is time to say goodnight." And he bent his head just slightly more, so that their lips met. He found her hand, while he was kissing her, and bent her fingers against his, feeling the bright sparks flow between them. She moaned, and moved her body against his, making him groan at her, and exert all his efforts in suppressing the reaction she caused. He found this harder and harder to do, as the days went by, wanting only let her feel how much he desired her. But this would not be proper, not until she was truly his.
When he could not bear it any longer, he gently stepped backwards, separating their bodies. She slowly opened her eyes, dark, deep, soft, and looked up at him. "More."
"No, Christine. No more tonight." He raised his hand to brush a fallen strand of hair back off her forehead, treasuring the feel of her skin beneath his fingertips. "We must talk."
She nodded, and sighed, and released him. He turned and exited her quarters, not daring to look back.
"***"
He met her at the entrance to sick bay, and they headed for the mess hall. This was such a common sight by now that no one even glanced at them as they passed. Tonight they ate with others, although he still found the habit of humans to talk throughout a meal strange. After he carried their trays to the busing station, she rose and tucked her hand through his arm, and they headed straight to her quarters. Once there, he led her to the table, and they sat down. He sat in his chair, back straight, hands on his thighs, and began.
"I was born in 2236 in the city of Shi'Kahr on Vulcan. My parents were merchants, selling fine linens. They were successful enough that they could afford to send me for higher education. As I had always applied myself to my studies, I was successful in my application to the Vulcan Science Academy. I was in my final year there when I was one of six students chosen to accompany one of the Vulcan Science Academy surveyors to a large asteroid, to assess its suitability for mining operations. Our shuttle had just been anchored to the asteroid when Vulcan was attacked. All seven of us, there in that shuttle, were rendered unconscious by the shock. When I awoke, with a pounding head, and emotions run riot, only one other and the surveyor were also struggling to consciousness. The surveyor released our anchor on the asteroid and headed for the Embassy on Earth at the highest speed the shuttle could maintain. He contacted the Embassy by subspace radio, and told them to be prepared, that healers would be needed. When the shuttle landed, falling the last two meters, I stumbled through the door, and was immediately taken by a healer to a small, quiet room. I was treated there for some time, until I recovered enough to function. But no one would tell me of the others."
He stopped for a moment, blinking his eyes. Chris rose from the table, going to the synthesizer and came back with a cup of steaming tea, which she set before him. He clasped his hands around the cup, feeling the warmth, and continued.
"When I was recovered enough to eat in the dining hall, and help with simple tasks around the Embassy, a recruiter from StarFleet appeared one day, and talked long with me. They would finish my education, and assure me a job. I did not even have to think about it, I simply agreed to go with him. They put me through a whole battery of tests, and suggested that I might consider engineering. The idea that I might choose my own path was so new to me that I could scarce believe it. Those of you who grew up with such choices have little understanding of what it is like for those of us who grew up bound by tradition. I applied myself well, and graduated near the top of my class. I then spent an extra year, studying transporter technology and engine design, before I was posted to the Enterprise."
Again he stopped, and this time he sipped from the teacup before him. He sat there a moment, staring at the swirling surface of the liquid. When he spoke again, his voice was lower.
"By this time, I had ascertained that I was truly alone in the world. All members of my clan had been on Vulcan that day, and none had survived. The family K'shan was not large, nor wealthy, and no member of it routinely traveled off-world, nor owned a vessel capable of space travel. Nor did they have investments not on Vulcan. I have no kin, no clan, no fortune. All that I am, all that I have, is tied to StarFleet."
Here Chris reached across the table, and laid her hands over his, "Kurik, fortune is not important to me. I feel so much for you, having lost your whole family all at once. I know how much that hurts. I grew up near the coast of Louisiana, where there are still violent storms, hurricanes that leave much death and destruction behind. I lost my grandparents to one such storm, and my older brother to another, when he was out on his boat, beyond reach of land, when the storm developed. My father died in a transport accident when I was a small child. The only relative I have left is my mother. I know how that loss feels."
He moved his hands, so that they covered hers, their fingers lightly linked together. They sat quietly for a few minutes, sharing their pain, silently consoling one another. When next he spoke, his voice was rough, and unsure. "There are things ...about Vulcan physiology ...which you should know. It is difficult to speak of these things. For reasons which you will understand when I am through speaking, it is the custom of most Vulcan families to bond their children when quite young." At the startled look on her face, he rushed to continue. "This is not a true marriage, it is more of a betrothal. However, a preliminary link is set between the two children, so that they grow used to each other as they mature. The young girl to whom I was bonded died in an accident when we were twelve. My parents were alarmed when this incident did not seem to affect me. They brought in a healer, who said he could find no trace of a severed bond. It was then thought that I was incapable of forming a bond, and no further thought of procuring a bondmate for me was entertained. It was only when I was being treated at the Embassy in San Francisco that the healer there found the traces of an incompletely formed bond. Apparently, the Elder that was chosen by the girl's parents was aged and unaware that he had not formed a true bond. Nor did the healer engaged by my parents discover this. It took an adept to find it and correct it. He assured me that I was capable of forming a true bond and I do believe this to be true."
Now he dipped his head, and took in a deep breath. When he raised his eyes again, it was to find hers there before him, waiting. "I believe that there is a bond forming between us. I can feel you, even when you are not present in the same room I am in. With your permission, I would discuss this with Spock. I know very little about bonding between a Vulcan and a Human." She was nodding at him, her eyes sparkling. He dipped his head again, drawing courage around him like a cloak before continuing.
"Adult Vulcans have … a cycle. A time driven by biology. When they are not capable of controlling their urge … to procreate. This is nature's way of insuring that our species continues. I have not experienced this yet, but it cannot be long off now. I wish you to understand that at that time, I will not be myself." He shuddered, trying to continue. She leaned forward, stroking his hands softly.
"Kurik, I am aware of Pon Farr. I have helped Dr McCoy in his research. Spock has been through this already, and McCoy learned as much as he could, in order to help him if needed."
He lifted his eyes to her, startled. "You are aware of this already?"
"Yes."
"And still you allow me to court you?"
She smiled at him, her face open and welcoming. "I've been trying to hurry you along as much as I can. I'm very ready to go further."
He looked at her, wondering. She knew, and yet she persisted. He felt something warm inside, expanding, filling up the empty places. And all around, he felt the soft silver shining, the delicate filaments that were beginning to bind them together. And then she rose from her seat, and came around to his side of the table, and sat in his lap, and kissed him. He wound his arms around her, and kissed her back, until she gasped for breath, and turned her face so that they lay together, cheek to cheek. "Oh, Kurik, I think I love you."
He could only hold her, exulting, unable to believe what he heard. And this time, when he felt the stirrings, he did not try to suppress them, but only continued to nuzzle against her, the soft moans that she made causing his nerves to flame with desire. It was with great difficulty that he left her that night.