Still smiling, Snape threw a glass against the wall just to hear the delicious sound of it shattering, and got to work. He rolled out his finest parchment (a gift from Lucius, ages past), and pulled up some pine green ink. He began to write.

This one had to flatter, be pompous and engage just a bit of curiosity.

Dear Gryffindor Prefect Percy Weasley,

It has come to my untimely attention that there is a particular band of miscreants bent on skullduggery, and that they reside in this castle. As Prefect, it is your solemn duty (as it is mine) to curb such behavior. I shall convene a meeting this Friday, in the room with the bay window at the end of the left corridor on the fourth floor.

Severus Snape

Head of House Slytherin

Snape frowned, and thought some more, This next one should be mysterious.

Dear Head Boy Roger Davies,

Recently, it has come to my attention that a band of merry miscreants wishes to plunge this castle into madness and mayhem. I should think you would wish to be apprised of the situation, so that you might take appropriate action. I shall convene a meeting this Friday, in the room with the bay window at the end of the left corridor on the fourth floor.

Severus Snape

Potions Master.

Snape crossed his arms, removed another idiotic paper and coated it completely in red ink. Then he stood, stretched his aching back, and began the long climb to the Owlry.

Percy looked pensive, thoughtful, but would probably attend. It was the best Snape could hope for, at any rate. He knew that the studious boy was the least biased of all the Weasleys, but Lucius had such a longstanding feud with Arthur that he counted himself lucky to get even a biased hearing.

Davies looked intrigued, at least he did before the Terrible Twins whisked the letter out of his grasp. Snape bit back a sigh, as he certainly didn't want the entire school knowing what he'd written. And any sign of weakness would be taken as an open invitation.

[a/n: Has anyone fallen in love with these characters? If I do go much further with this, it's going to stop being as funny and start being more serious. In no small part because HarryPotterWorld gets more established, and Harry breaking with conventions so much becomes... eh, stuff with Consequences!

I wouldn't have stopped the chapter here, but I need to come up with some mumbo-jumbo for Snape to say. this is an Important Meeting.

Reviews welcome, comments, anything folks!]