The Last Scion

by savannah0707

Seventeen-year old Bellamy Pearce is a Dhampir. She also has Moroi magic-fire to be exact. The Guardian Council, along with her Guardian aunt have pushed her into training at St. Vladimir's. She is away from her friends, her home, and everything she knows. How is she ever going to survive six months of curious Guardians and students while hiding her closest secrets?

36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

BELLAMY:

Arriving back to St. Vladimir's was the easy part. Actually stepping off of the plane and facing the people and things I'd left was harder. Even that however, was easier than the complicated and Herculean task I was now facing. Death. My Mason had died. The man I was still in love with had sacrificed himself for others, and he had been taken from me. The horrors of our world had ripped him from my life.

If I'd thought our breakup six weeks ago had been tough, this was my worst imaginable, worst possible scenario. This was a debilitating feeling. I could already feel that growing inability to face this, sneaking its way back in. Bridgette had offered to come and help me through this awful and unbearable situation, and as much as I felt having her by my side might help, I couldn't take her from her work. As a new Guardian, there were things that I needed to learn to face on my own. At least that's what I'd thought until I was actually facing all of this. Now all I wanted was a hand to hold.

I made it off of the plane one step at a time, and all the way to my scheduled meeting with Headmistress Kirova. No one took notice of my arrival and the campus was so quiet for a change, even for the daylight hours when Guardians were doing rounds around the perimeters and dorms. I was thankful for that. Why Kirova had scheduled a daytime meeting was beyond me, but I was going along with whatever others wanted right now. Making decisions was not in my immediate plans. Welcoming me back to the Academy, the Headmistress took my orders from the Guardian Council. I was reporting for duty a full week early, and was given an informal schedule until my duties began. The meeting with Kirova lasted for two full hours, and after we finished, Kirova called in another school Guardian to show me my new Guardian living quarters.

"Bellamy." Alberta Petrov looked surprised and as happy as she could to see me. Under the current circumstances, happiness was lost to many.

"Hello again Alberta."

"You are the new Guardian we are receiving?"

I nodded. She and I finally left the office building and made our way across campus.

"I'm sorry." Alberta finally said, referring I think to Mason's death.

I wanted to respond with some logical, or comforting statement in return, but I hadn't yet found my own strength to face this tragic event. I gave a sigh.

"If I can do anything Bellamy…" I appreciated her offer. It was quite sweet, especially since I didn't have Bridgette with me.

I gave her another nod. We arrived to the Guardian residences, and she handed me a set of keys. The first opened the front doors after hours. The second would open up any of the kitchens within the building. There were two on each floor of this eight floor structure. The third was a key to my own postbox. It gave Bridgette a place to send me postcards from her International adventures. (Not that she could say much about where she was or what she was doing most of the time) The final key was to my room. I was four floors up in the building, and as I walked beside Alberta, I recognized the corridors.

"I'm down the hall from Dimitri." I mentioned.

"He will happy to know that. He still worries."

"He has a kind heart and good intentions." I responded. "Is he around?"

Alberta shook her head. "I think he is still on duty, but he'll finish soon." She stopped at a door only two across the way from Dimitri's door. "I will let him know that you are here."

I slid the key into the lock, and twisted the handle. "No." I refused her offer. "I will see him soon enough, and I think I need some time on my own before my world crashes in even further."

"I understand." Alberta hugged me, and I held back the shaking that threatened to rumble through every part of me. "I will be back to check in on you later." I knew that there was no debate I could give right now that would appease her, so I agreed.

Closing the door behind me, gave me the silence I wanted to run from, and the silence I needed to get used to. Everything had gone perfectly still and silent when I was told about Mason's death. It was the worst thing in the world, but at the same time, I did not want the chatter and faces trying to comfort me. Silence was currently my double-edged sword. I had so many boxes to unpack, and clothes to pull out and hang. Now was not the time though. I sat down and still held so much at bay. This was not going to be easy. I was going to have some sort of breakdown soon, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I missed him so much. There was so much I regretted never saying to him. There were so many regrets I kept repeating over and over in my head.

Our breakup was not because we had stopped loving each other, but because of our distance. We had promised that distance would not affect our relationship, but it was so hard to admit that everything grew intensely difficult. He had to stay at the Academy, and I was taken away to do more field training. We wrote, we called a few times, and we were still very much in love, but the difficulties of maintaining the long distances began to get harder and harder. The split was never something we wanted to be permanent. I pulled out the last letter he'd sent from my pocket.

'I miss you' he had written. 'I love you.' I could still see where my tears hit the page each time I read it. I had been crying for the last week and truly I thought I had no tears left, but every time I thought about him, I found that I was not nearly close to finished crying. I needed to find some place away from this room that all of a sudden felt isolated. My first thought was of the Church attic, but I wasn't ready to visit there again. No, that wasn't true. The truth was that I was not ready to see Christian again. Not yet. So, the attic was not an option. The actual Church however was not off limits. I could sit at the back and keep to my shadowy prison. I pulled my hood over my head, and left my room. The larger Church was not available to anyone as it was set up for a funeral, so I made my way to the opposite end of campus. What a day for surprises, I thought as I entered the smaller Church quietly. I spotted him sitting with his head lowered, hands resting behind his neck. He looked sad and lost. I didn't want to disturb whatever he was clearly contemplating, but I knew I needed to say hello to him.

DIMITRI:

"Looks like we are both in need of a little sanctuary today." She said, taking the seat beside me, pulling the hood of her jacket down.

If anything or anyone could've made me feel marginally better, it was Bellamy Pearce. I glanced for a second before completely turning to see her. I was nearly speechless. The Council had kept their promise, and let her return-this time as a Guardian.

"I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow." I said as her arms wrapped around me.

I hugged her back, both of us holding tight to each other as we sat. I hadn't thought about it much with everything that had happened in the last nine months since Bellamy had been gone, but her presence had absolutely been missed.

"I got here early this morning. I had a meeting with Headmistress Kirova that was far too long for my liking." She told me.

"You graduated early." I let her know that I was fully aware of a few things that had occurred in her life while she'd been away.

She went wide-eyed. "You knew?"

"I knew." I said. "But I thought the Guardian Council would have put you into your assignment earlier. Once they gave you your new status, I figured…."

"Age laws are still in effect." She reminded me. I could almost forget that she was only going to be eighteen in one week. She spoke and acted as if she were older. "Because I was still seventeen when the Council gave me a status change, I can't officially start guarding until I'm eighteen."

"So, why did they send you a week early to start training?"

She looked compunctious, reluctant to answer my question, but she knew I would find out anyway.

"I thought it was to punish me at first. I figured sending me here with the knowledge that I would face this tragedy longer was their way of punishing me for so many things, but as I considered the Council's decision, I came to the blatant conclusion that this decision is more about me than Mason." She was admitting to her mistakes. "The Council was probably afraid that I would run again after I heard about Mason's death." I furrowed my brow in question to her comment about running.

"After Mason and I broke up, I did the most childish thing in the world. I ran away. I was hurting. I needed to get away. I couldn't breathe. I stayed away for about a month. There was a time when I told Mason that I no longer knew myself without him in my life, and that I was not interested in knowing who I might be without him."

I could hear the choked emotion held back.

"After we broke up, I rebelled. I didn't exactly go off the rails, but I straddled the line pretty close. Nothing too dangerous. I got a tattoo, dyed my hair hardcore hot pink, and disappeared into the human world." She gave a small short laugh. "Bridgette found me after two days. She sat me down and forced me to talk about everything; not just about Mason, but about killing Brooklyn, about Christian, and even about my reluctance and fear of becoming a Guardian early."

"She found you after a week? It couldn't have taken her that long."

Bellamy caught the path my question was leading.

"After everything I'd gone through, she felt that a little rebellion was justified. She handed over my bank and credit cards, made sure I was safe, and then gave me tips to staying off of Guardian radar. She knew I would check in or return when I was ready."

I had to smile at that. "Bridgette was always great at her job. She could track me anywhere too."

BELLAMY:

It was a comfort to be sitting beside him again. I'd forgotten how consoling this soft nature of his could be.

"I assume you've been briefed and told who you are going to be guarding." Dimitri continued back to the professional side of life, and I was sure he was fishing for information. Subtle.

Again, I was reluctant to say much about my new assignment. I knew how he would react. But, it wasn't as if I had much of a choice in my assignment at this point. And, I was so right. I thought smoke and fire were going to start coming from his eyes and ears. He was trying his best to stay under control while in this Church, but I could see the cracks in his titanium armor.

"I am aware of the risks." I explained. "I know the history between me and Jesse better than anyone. But, in this case, I think that the benefits far outweigh the risks rather than the other way around."

"How so?" He was gritting his teeth.

"Well," I had never actually seen him so enraged, "First of all, I get the opportunity to gain on the job experience from some of the best Guardians I know." I had his hand with mine, and was using all of my charm to calm him down. "And so long as I have Jesse Zeklos in a controlled environment, I can keep him under my thumb as much as possible."

I saw a smile creeping in. "I guess if anyone can get that kid under thumb, it's you."

"Plus," I let Dimitri in on a few well kept secrets, "I am Jesse's last chance at a Guardian. The Council is tired of handing over Guardians to him. He's gone through the lot. His parents are also unhappy about the running faucet approach to his Guardian detail."

"He's had that many?"

"How many have you seen come and go from the Academy? They've either been let go by the family, or they've requested transfers because he is such a problem. I've seen the files. He is a bit of a nightmare."

Now Dimitri was trying to hide his smile. He was finding far too much humor in this impending assignment.

"This may be more interesting than I thought to watch over the next few months." He joked.

"Jesse Zeklos is not about to get away with much on my watch from now on." I stated.

"Yes." Dimitri agreed. "That is why it will be so interesting. He is about to get a rude awakening."

We sat for another hour in near silence. I was back in my tragic and destroyed mental bubble, thinking again about Mason, considering answers to every question I had that might never be answered. The questions were beginning to anger me instead of further sadden me. I wondered if he thought about me when he made the ridiculous decision to run out and find a random group of Strigoi. Did he think of me? Did he consider the danger? And, did he ever once think about what losing him might do to me? The anger was easier to bottle than the sadness. I pushed it back down, keeping it tightly put away.

"Would you like me to walk you back to your new living space? " I heard Dimitri ask. His words were fuzzy at first, but as I let my thoughts disappear, I saw him smile.

Again, it was not close to a full smile, but it was the best either of us could provide.

"No." I shook my head. "I will start to unpack later. There is someone else that I need to see and talk to today."

"Christian?" He guessed.

"No. Eddie Castille. He's probably still sleeping. It's early."

"For you," Dimitri mentioned, "I have no doubt he'd wake up."

I thought about that, and I knew it was the truth. Eddie would be happy to see that I had decided to be here after all. He would know that what he said had held more bearing than anyone else, but I then thought about what I would face walking in to Eddie's dorm room. It was the same dorm room that belonged to my Mason. I couldn't do it. I could not face walking into that room again. I wasn't ready.

"Can I ask you a favor?"

"Anything." Dimitri tilted his head, looking back at me. "You can always ask me anything Bellamy."

"I'm not strong enough to go up to his dorm room again."

Dimitri grasped exactly why I could not go to that room, and what I needed from him.

"How about," his arm slipped around my shoulders as he stood, bringing me with him, "I go and retrieve Mr. Castille, while you wait in the lobby."

"Thank you." I said, walking slowly across campus again.

EDDIE:

The pounding on my door was enough to wake the dead. I hadn't been sleeping much at

all these days, unable to completely comprehend that my best-friend was gone. He had died saving someone else. He died trying to save Rose from the house of Strgoi after she stayed behind, willing to sacrifice her life for us to escape. I couldn't help regretting every decision I had made, and the role I had played, trying to erase the blame I felt. If I had chosen not to go on that little adventure with Mason, would he have gone? Could I have changed his mind? Would he still be alive today if I had made other choices? I had so many questions that could not be answered. My body still felt so tired and weak, but as hard as I tried, sleep came only in sporadic bursts of exhaustion. I was almost thankful when I heard the early morning knock on my door. I had finished all of my homework, and even read ahead in a few of my courses. I'd been through practically every magazine, book, and article in my room and the common room; I had straightened Mason's things up for the umpteenth time in a week, and boredom was setting in again. I leapt from my bed to answer the door.

On most normal occasions, a Guardian at my door would mean bad news. I'd had enough bad news. There was nothing more that I could hear that could be worse. He was smiling though. I rarely saw Guardian Belikov smile in this way. I worried.

"How are you feeling?" He inquired about my health after I'd been bitten and essentially drugged by a pack of Strigoi.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I get a little better each day." I said

Again he smiled. "Come with me." He insisted. "I found something that might make those days a little bit easier."

Curiosity grabbed a hold of me. The statement was so cryptic that I had to follow along to see what anyone could possibly thing might make me feel any better, or make recovering any easier.

Dimitri stopped at the lobby front desk of the dorm building. He spoke to the man sitting in front of a computer, probably playing World of Warcraft.

"She is waiting in the area over there." The man pointed to his right.

I did a double take, listening to the words. "She?" Neither man elaborated any further, so I clearly had to go find out on my own.

I waited for Guardian Belikov to follow, turning when he didn't. "Are you joining me?"

He shook his head. "I only wanted to make sure she got here safely. I'm on duty, but promised to check in on her later. Be careful." He warned. "She too is extremely fragile right now."

I gave a nod, still unsure of who I was about to see. I watched as the Guardian instructor left the building before I rounded the corner into the small waiting room. Part of me wasn't expecting her to be here, so my joy could not be contained. I had hoped she would come, and that she might find her own courage after we talked last. I understood her reservation in coming to Mason's funeral, but secretly and silently, I had hoped she would be the one sitting beside me tomorrow.

"Bellamy." I approached her so slowly, uncertain of her state.

Belikov had been right. She looked breakable, as though touching her might cause her to crack into tiny little pieces, unable to be placed back together. I could see that she was an inch or so away from a serious emotional breakdown. I could see all of the pain she was feeling in those once bright blue eyes of hers. She took a single step towards me, and I rushed then to hold her to me. She sank down to her knees, bringing me along with her. I knew every part of pain that she was experiencing. It was unbearable to see her going through this too.

"How do we do this Eddie? How do we go on from here? How do we move forward without him?"

I wasn't sure there was anything that I could say to make her feel any better. I wasn't sure what to say. If ever there was an impossible situation, finding a way of moving on without the love of your life was it. I couldn't fix this for her. I couldn't give him back to her. Even holding her in my arms, I could feel that Bellamy had lost a part of herself.

"We just do Bells. We are Guardians. We love, we lose, we mourn, and we…" I felt like I was making this worse for her. I felt like I was making this catastrophic death seem lighter than it was.

"I lost my person Eddie." I hugged her closer to my chest. "I lost the one person who accepted every flaw and secret about me, the person who knew things about me when I didn't, and the one person who was mine."

"He was yours Bells. He was all yours, even after you two…" I trailed off, not wanting to be more of an asshole by mentioning their breakup. "He was yours."

"He was. So, what am I supposed to do now?"

"I really don't know Bells."

BELLAMY:

This was going to suck. This was going to be an overwhelming cataclysmically emotional night. I knew I was not alone in my pain, but I wasn't sure that I could physically handle this. I knew I couldn't handle it emotionally. The Headmistress had been asked to choose someone to speak about Mason at his funeral. There had been so many volunteers, all willing to stand up and take on the task. So, why had Ellen Kirova insisted that it be me? It had taken pleas from Kirova, Bridgette, and I'd even received a message from Alberta asking me nicely to do this. Ultimately it was Eddie Castille who convinced me to stand up in front of a church full of mourners, and talk about Mason. It wasn't that I did not love Mason enough to do this. It was bringing all of my memories to the forefront of my mind again, knowing that he as gone and that was all they would be from now on. I sat at the end of my bed, reviewing the words that I had been piecing together and editing. A knock on my door interrupted me. It was Dimitri.

"It's time Bells." He said, making my world start to crash in again.

The dark abyss I'd crawled, or rather fallen into when I had heard about Mason's death was calling again. And, I was so ready to dive right back in. Dimitri walked down to the lobby with me. He had to go and check in on another Dhampir novice who'd been equally as affected by Mason's death. Mason had mentioned Rose Hathaway a few times when I'd been here last. The pair had been friends since they were much younger, so like Eddie's pain, I could relate to what Rose was feeling. She too was blaming herself, but which of us wasn't.

Yuri was waiting to walk to the church with me since Dimitri couldn't. On the one hand, I hated feeling so unstable that those around me were afraid that if left alone for long enough, I'd fall to irreparable pieces. On the other hand, it wasn't out of the question. Yuri hesitated, but when I hugged him, he wrapped his arms right around me in return. We walked silently together to the crowded church, and it was my turn to hesitate. I took Yuri's hand when he offered it, helping me get through the impossible act of walking into the church. I spotted Eddie talking to Christian, and still couldn't face that mess either. I would see him again, but not in the state I was in. I sat down, and was soon joined by Eddie. My head found his shoulder as his arm held around me.

When it came time for me to get up front to say sweet things about Mason, and share memories, Dimitri and Eddie were both at my sides. That's when the whispers of my name started. I was shaking again, but one whisper nearly stopped me in my tracks.

"Who is she?" The girl beside Christian asked, and Christian's voice was a whisper.

"Bellamy." I heard.

I kept walking, concentrated on what I would do, and what I would say. I looked over at the casket Mason had been placed into, and my knees went weak. Eddie caught me before I fell, followed by Dimitri.

"You don't have to do this Bellamy. If you can't…"

"I do have to do this." I paused before walking up the few steps. "I have to do this for Mason." I let go of both men. "I need to walk up those steps on my own. I have to be strong enough to at least give Mason that much."

Eddie took a step back, letting go of me, as did Dimitri, and I took those steps. It hurt making my way up, but I did it. When I turned, looking out into the crowd, I saw so many faces, looking back at me expectantly. I took the deep breath that I needed, but it didn't help.

"I have been trying like mad to understand the words I have written about Mason." I lifted up a set of note cards, and put them to the side. "Standing up here now, and talking about how strong, brave, funny, and protective he is…was, seems so trivial and trite now. I don't need to remind any of us about that. Mason lit up a room when he entered, and he made our lives that much more interesting. I know he kept me on my toes." I quieted, gripping my fingers to the sides of the podium. I let my eyes drift to where Mason was laying again. I wanted this world to stop. I wanted back my world-the one where Mason was alive, and I still had hope of my life with him.

"You selfish bloody bastard." I said.

I hadn't meant to say the words out loud, but I was angry. I was still sad, but I was angry too. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dimitri look to Yuri and Eddie. They were going to be beside me any moment. I stopped them from their approach.

"I'm sorry." I told the room. "That was not part of my intended speech."

I had refused a Queen the opportunity to use my power, I'd faced down a Strigoi family member and survived it all. I then found a way to become a Guardian. That was all so easy in comparison to what I felt the need to do. I could feel it. That great emotional breakdown I'd been holding back was flooding through me now. I shifted, pulling my arms around my core as the pain started to return. And then there was no one but me and Mason in the room. The walls were closing in, and the roof was coming down. I had nothing left to hold these words at bay.

"How dare you." I angrily spoke to him. "How dare you leave me here on my own without you." The tears were flowing. "You selfish bastard!" I shouted at him. "I meant it when I said I love you Mason. I meant it every single time. I mean it now. I love you still, and you're gone. Don't leave me again. Please Mase, do not leave me here alone. You should be here. You need to be here to hold me and tell me that things will work out." I could not stop the tears from falling. I needed to sit, so I used one of the steps.

"I just want one more moment to hold your hand. I want one more moment to kiss you. And, I want to hear you say you love me one…last…time."

I felt someone sit down beside me and take my hand. "I know you said that you wanted to do this, and I know you think that you are alone, but…" Dimitri was doing his best to comfort me.

"Turns out I'm not as strong as I'd like to think I am."

He used his thumb to wipe away a tear on its way to falling fast down my cheek. He helped me to stand, keeping his arms around me. I needed a few minutes out of this church to recover. Walking by so many people, I felt their pity and wanted to scream.

"You are so strong Bellamy." Dimitri continued. "You are one of the strongest people I know. You're right up there with Bridgette."

His statement shocked me for sure. "That's saying a lot."

"I mean it."

I sat down on a small stone bench as my Guardian friend knelt in front of me.

"He's gone Dimitri, and I don't know how to be as strong as I need to be without him."

His hand touched to my hair. "He isn't gone Bells. He isn't gone if you believe that he will always be…"

"Stop it." I commanded my friend with a roar in my voice. "I do not want to be placated. I don't want you to mollify my pain and anger with the ridiculous and cruel statement that Mason will always love me and he'll always be with me…in my heart."

"I'm sorry." He apologized. "When you put it like that, it does sound rather…"

"Harsh." I answered for him. "Why do people say such awful things like that to others in this situation? It feels like the worst thing you can say. It only makes the hurt bigger."

Dimitri actually understood what I meant. He put a hand to my knee before standing. I needed a few minutes alone. When I was ready, I returned to my seat next to Eddie, pleased or at least pacified by the fact that Yuri took the seat on my other side, comforting me as well. At the end of the funeral service, a long line formed to say goodbye to Mason. I stayed at Eddie's side, hoping that no one mentioned my very public outburst. Why couldn't I have had a more private breakdown?

"I can't believe I lost control like that." I said as Eddie and I walked slowly. His arms were still around me, and the closer we got to Mason, the more that build of emotion returned. I turned my head into Eddie's chest, tears pooling in my eyes and onto his shirt.

"You did good babe." He whispered to me. "You were so brave to get up there. Come on." He tried to lead me forward. "On our way to Seattle, he talked to me about you again. He still loved you Bells. He tried to move on for awhile. He did so much to try and forget the pain you were both in when you had to leave, but you were always with him Bells."

Eddie's word held a little more comfort. I could hold on to the idea that Mason had never stopped loving me. When we reached the front, I looked at the casket, carefully keeping my control this time. Dhampir and Moroi traditions were to leave special or significant items with those who died. I honestly never thought I'd be asked to leave anything for Mason this soon in my life. Eddie's arm never faltered or left me. He went first, turning to me then.

"Do you want to…"

I was playing with the ring still on my finger, the one Mason had given me, the one I still wore after all this time. The ring twirled around my finger, but I was not ready to part with it.

"I can't yet." I refused.

Eddie nodded, bringing me along with him.

My hand ran along the casket as we walked by. "Goodnight my sweet Guardian." I said. "Goodnight Guardian Ashford." We walked outside into the fresh air and inevitably I was being watched by so many people.

Eddie and I heard the whispers and veiled comments as people made their way by us, looking down in sympathy or in umbrage over my verbal outburst. I assumed the only reason nothing was said any louder was because of the cross looks Eddie gave.

"Great. Now I'm going to be known as that crazy Guardian who lost it and started screaming at her deceased boyfriend…ex-boyfriend."

I laid my head on Eddie's shoulder, closing my eyes, and completely checking out for two minutes. By the time I reopened my eyes, paying full attention to what occurred around me again, Yuri was kneeling in front of me, his hands holding mine, his thumbs running across the tops of my hands while he and Eddie debated whether or not to keep me sitting on this bench or lead me to my room. They had to be convinced that I might have another public flare-up.

"Do I get a say in where I go or don't go?" I questioned. My voice was raw and scratchy. Even I barely recognized the sound of it.

"Bells." I felt Eddie's comforting arm tighten around me. He kissed my head, helping to further soothe me.

"Of course you get a say Bellamy." Yuri lifted one of his hands to my cheek, his fingers gently running over my skin. His eyes looked at me in a way that they never had. I did not like it one bit. Resentment and rage burned and bubbled to the surface of my emotions.

"Don't." I commanded Yuri, shaking his hands away from me. "Do not look at me with weakness or pity." I stopped him from saying anything. "And do not use that mollifying tone, as though I may break in half."

"Bells." Eddie started, but my head shot to the side as more people filed out of the Church.

My heart already felt as though it were in irreparable pieces, but seeing Christian standing less than a yard away only made things worse. This was something I never thought I would feel when it came to Christian, but seeing him made me think of those six months when I had been a student here at the Academy; those six months when I had my Mason with me, never even considering the thought that he might be gone before we were given a chance. Eventually I would have to face Christian and talk to him again. That look of recognition told me undoubtedly that if I didn't go to him, he would find me. It would be an improbable task to get through to graduation without acknowledging one another. I wanted to see him. I wanted to talk to him. But, I did not want to do either of those things tonight. His arms were wrapped tightly around another blonde girl. She was pretty, and she was Moroi. I watched subtly as they interacted with others around them, and I was incredibly satisfied and happy that Christian had found someone who made him happy. I gave a heavy sigh, lowering my head.

"Bells." Eddie said my name. "What do you want to do?"

"I…" My eyes briefly shot over to Christian again, this time watching as he looked back at me.

He appeared to be fighting some strange inner conflict, so I looked away.

"I…want to go. I want to be away from here." I decided. "I need to be away from here."

Eddie looked back at me, his eyes then obviously seeing Christian behind me. "Yeah, okay Bellamy." He stood, his arm, never leaving me, lifting me without any effort at the same time.

Yuri followed with no hesitation. "Let's go."

CHRISTIAN:

Mason Ashford had died under the most unnecessary, tragic, and brutal circumstances. Five of us had been captured by humans working under Strigoi. We were held and more or less mentally tortured by those Strigoi for days. Well, most of us were mentally tormented. Eddie Castille however, was also physically tortured. The Strigoi holding us captive used Eddie to feed from, drugging him and nearly killing him. Rose Hathaway and Mason Ashford were the two reasons we were able to effectively escape and survive. Mia and I had quietly talked after she was no longer hysterical, both coming to the conclusions that we were far more altered by the ordeal, and even more aware of what horrors the real world held. It was the worst experience of my life to date. Not knowing if I would live or die, I spent time reviewing so much of my life, focusing on the happiest parts. I was in love. I was in love again. I saw Lissa's face as a constant reminder to survive. I saw her smile and felt her kiss, willing me to push forward and find a way back. And after that, I felt the comforting touch and always protective guarding of Bellamy Pearce.

Bellamy and I had lost touch for months. I was not sure how often she and Mason spoke, but after she left, it was as though my friend had simply vanished. I thought about her so often over the months before Lissa arrived. Honestly, I thought of her still even after I met Lissa. I was no longer in love with Bellamy, but that did not make us any less connected or friends. I saw her face in my mind again, and was stunned in place to see that face in person again. Although, to be fair, I should've expected her to be nowhere else tonight.

She was falling apart in front of mine and everyone else's eyes, and there was nothing I could do. It was tearing me up inside to watch her be visibly destroyed. She had come back to St. Vladimir's. But, when had she arrived? How long would she be staying this time? And why had she not let me know she would be here? All questions I had running through my mind as I held Lissa to my side, her hands held to my waist as though I might be taken away again.

"How terrible." I heard Lissa say beside me.

She was in a quiet conversation with Dhampir Shane Reyes, who was also friends with Bellamy. The two were discussing Bellamy. More importantly, Shane was explaining Bellamy's close relationship with Mason, and why his death was so destructive to her.

"How long was she here?" Lissa asked.

I found myself answering before Shane. "Six months."

"You knew her too?" I heard the edge of mixed concern and suspicion in Lissa's voice.

"Yes." I said. "I knew her." I left it at that, very unwilling to go into detail about me and Bellamy.

After the funeral, we all said our final goodbyes to our friend, we walked slowly out into the cold air. I slipped my jacket off, placing it around Lissa's shoulders, holding her tight as she and Rose talked. Rose walked away, insisting on being alone, but I knew that would not sit well with her best-friend. Lissa did not need a bond to be able to read Rose right now. She was hurting. Rose blamed herself for Mason's death, and she worried that others might blame her too. Lissa and I stood together, others coming to talk to us, but I really did not want to be here right now. There was something I needed to take care of. I didn't know that tonight was the best time, but I had to see Bellamy. Lissa was going to check on Rose whether she liked it or not, and I was definitely not needed.

My head turned briefly, scanning the area as people roamed and stood quietly. Again, I was not expecting to see her, but here she was, looking back at me for seconds before she was escorted away. I had to see her. I had to talk to her, if just for a few minutes. I looked around for someone who might know where she would go. Guardian Petrov. Yes, Alberta would know. If Bellamy had returned to the Academy, then her former trainers were bound to have more details. I let Lissa go to Rose, promising to meet her in a short time.

Rushing over to Alberta, I waited for her to acknowledge me as she was in conversation with another Guardian.

She turned. "Mr. Ozera. What can I do for you?"

I walked up closer, my heart pounding with anticipation of answers to my questions.

"Bellamy is back." I pointed out, receiving a noncommittal nod. "When did she return? Is she staying this time?"

Alberta flinched. She actually physically flinched before responding to my questions.

"She's a Guardian?" This was not the answer I was expecting to hear. It was a shock to my system to hear that Bellamy was not a student, but a Guardian here at the Academy.

"She's only seventeen." I argued.

"She's eighteen in a week."

After learning a few more details about what Bellamy had been up to since leaving, I could now better understand why I had not heard from her. According to Alberta, after unintentionally fulfilling her novice tests, usually only given to graduating students, Bellamy was put through a few final tests by our Guardians. She had of course passed them with few mistakes or injuries. The Guardian Council then decided that she should graduate and be granted her Guardian status a few months early. But I wondered, did that mean she was now an Academy Guardian, set to guard all Moroi students, or was she promised to a specific Moroi? If so, which one?

I left Alberta at the Church, making my way across campus, feeling more and more conflicted by all of my questions and new revelations. If Bellamy was a Guardian now, she was living in Guardian quarters on the North end pf campus. That would be where Eddie and Guardian Tverskaya would take her. I headed that way, arriving to find my entrance blocked from all sides. There seemed to be a Guardian congregation just outside of the building. I was never going to make it through, but for Bellamy, I had to try.

DIMITRI:

"I want to see her! Please let me in. Let me see her."

I heard the loud demands being made as a group of Guardians seemed to be holding back someone who clearly did not belong within this building. Returning only minutes before, I was mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. It had been a long few weeks, and it seemed like an even longer evening. Sunrise was coming in a few hours, and I only had so many of those hours to sleep. But first, I started to recognize the very insistent voice, demanding to be let by. It was Christian Ozera, trying to push his way through a horde of Guardians. Not his best decision. Of course, neither was going along with Rose to Seattle. I wasn't sure which was a more dangerous decision. Christian was actually the last person I expected to be making such a fuss in this area of the school. I shifted my way in through Guardians, coming face to face with the Moroi soon enough.

"Christian, what are you doing? Why are you here? Where is Vasilissa?" I had more questions for him than I thought.

"Lissa is checking in on Rose." He attempted to push throw many arms again, but my hand touched to his shoulder, stopping him.

"Dimitri." He was being as polite and restrained as possible. "Is Bellamy inside there?" He motioned towards the building at my back.

"Yes." I truthfully answered him, knowing I could not hide her from him. He had seen her at Mason's funeral. And clearly he'd already discovered the small detail of her becoming a Guardian.

"I need to see her." I could see it in his eyes. He was getting riled again by the thought of Bellamy being so within reach.

"Christian, you cannot see her right now." It felt wrong of me to keep them apart, but I also felt a strong need still to protect Bellamy. I had seen what she was capable of, but I also had great insight to her limitations.

"Go back to your dorm and rest. You too have been through quite a trial. You need your rest and so does she."

"No." He refused. "Let me in. Let me see her. Please Dimitri." He pleaded. "She will want to see me. She is my friend."

"She is Christian." I kept my cool. "Of course she is, but she is not up to seeing anyone at the moment. Give her some time. She is grieving much deeper than you or I."

I saw him take a deep and calmer breath. "She will want to see me."

"Eventually, yes."

"His hand caught my arm as I turned.

"At least tell me-is she okay? Is she…"

I did what I could to conceal what I knew for sure, but I also could not lie to Christian. He was her friend, and he did have a right to know some things.

"Okay might not be the best way to describe her at the moment. As I said, her grief goes far deeper than yours or mine. We lost a friend, but Bellamy lost…"

"Her person." Christian finished, using the term that Bellamy often used to describe what Mason was to her. I saw anguish flash in his eyes, knowing that Bellamy was suffering so much. "But, is she coping?"

I could not answer his question. I had no answer for him.

"Just tell her-tell her that I am here for her. I m…"

"I will Christian. Thank you."

I watched the troubled and grieving Moroi turn and slowly walk away, cautious as he looked back every few steps. Bellamy would find him and talk to him soon, I had no doubt, but I also knew that she was in enough pain at the moment. Piling more on would certainly break her. After Christian was out of sight, and distanced enough, I walked into the Guardian's building, on my way to in fact see that my friend was okay. Yes, it was hypocritical that I should get to see Bellamy while turning another friend away, but there was also a separation between them now. Bellamy was days away from becoming an official Guardian, and Christian was a student. Again, I was being a hypocrite considering my progressing friendship with Rose. Still, I would let Bellamy decide when to see Christian.

I made my way to the correct floor, dropping my things into my room before knocking on her door, my exhaustion put aside for more time.

Yuri was positioned outside of Bellamy's door, situated directly across from it, staring at the structure as though he could open it with the power of his mind. I was not sure if he had already knocked on her door, receiving no answer, if he had been turned away, continuing to stay, or if he had decided fearfully to simply stand guard from this side of the door.

"Is she still in there?"

"She is." Yuri said, maintaining his location. "But she won't answer to anyone when we knock." He shifted his gaze to me. "You are welcome to try. If anyone has a shot, it might be you Dimitri."

I disagreed, but was willing to make an attempt at knocking anyway. I leaned my head onto her door, knocking lightly.

"Bells, it's Dimitri. It's Thor." Still we continued to hear nothing, heightening my uneasiness. "Bellamy, let me know you are okay in there please." I appealed to her, keeping my voice calm and concerned. "Throw a shoe at the door or just shout for me to go away. нибудъ маленъкий." I finished in Russian, hoping she might hear urging tone.

I waited, ready to give up and give her the space she so clearly wanted, but after a minute, a small piece of paper slid out from under her door. 'I'm fine.' Her short note stated. ' Let me sleep.'

I handed the page off to Yuri. He looked hopeful before reading the quickly written few words.

"I'll go Bellamy, but I need you to know that you will survive this. The last time you were here." I spoke to her door again, "you and I talked about you and Mason. You called him your contradiction. You told me how lost you knew you would be without him, and you gave me the signs of what to expect if this situation ever came to pass. Bells, I can help you through this if you let me. I can help."

I turned to leave.

"I was almost certain you could get her to unlock that door." Yuri said. "I was counting on her responding to you."

My eyes closed and for the first time since I had been noticing Yuri's interest in Bellamy, I noticed his consternation too.

"If she decides to respond or come out, please inform Bellamy that her friends, Moroi and Dhampir alike have been by to check in on her."

Yuri's expression turned from one of consternation to one of what I could only construe as rivalry.

"But her big bad pseudo brother sent them away."

Okay, clearly Yuri and I were going to need to talk. We were both friends with Bellamy, both protective of her for different reasons, and it was clear that Yuri's reasons were going to become a problem.

"Do you not view sending people away, people who care for her as overbearing?"

"No." I flatly answered him.

"You cannot make decisions for her."

"It sounds as though that would give you more of an opportunity to take advantage of her." I fought back. "And I am not making decisions for her. When she is ready, it will be up to her to decide when she sees others." I was touching on a still sensitive subject, but I could admit that Yuri was someone who could actually understand Bellamy's pain.

"Remember what you felt when you lost Katja."

"It destroyed me." Yuri admitted, revisiting the loss of a Dhampir woman he had loved before Bellamy. The one thing that I could say about the flirtation between these two was that Yuri was looking forward, and Bellamy was no longer the symptom but the cause.

"Losing the person you love is the most difficult part of this job to overcome. Even after all of this time, I…"

Yuri shut down and both of us were silenced by the sound of a door unlocking. We turned to see Bellamy, changed into a pair of sweats, standing in front of us. Her hair was tied back away from her face, but single strands still stuck to the sides of her face where tears worked as glue.

"Bells." I acknowledged her, and her eyes flickered with the shine that was once so bright.

"Dimitri." She whispered. I could see her indecision in addressing Yuri, but she gave him a slow nod. "My contradiction is gone. Forever." She said, stepping to the side, finally allowing someone access into her space.

"I will talk to her." I commented to Yuri.

Yuri also seemed put out by Bellamy's choice to talk to me, more so when she closed her door.

"I hate that I did not get the chance to say goodbye." She sat down onto the bed she had obviously been on when I knocked, pulling her knees up to her chest. "I didn't get a chance to talk him down from whatever ledge he was obviously on when he decided to run off and… I yelled at him Dimitri." She switched up. "I yelled at him during his funeral."

I sat down beside her, letting her know that I was happy to listen to her talk.

"I think I take the award for the worst person in the world."

She was careful not to use the word girlfriend after they temporarily split.

"Don't say that Bellamy. You are grieving."

"No." She refuted. "No. I had a choice. I was given the chance to come back here to the Academy. I could've finished all of my training here."

"And you chose not to?" I questioned her. "What changed your mind? What stopped you?"

"Bridgette." She said the name that only recently started to give me less pain and confliction in my own heart. "I could've come here to train, or I could do more field training. If I chose field training, the Council had been willing to receive that training with Bridgette."

"You made the right choice Bellamy." I put my hand over hers, squeezing lightly, but she tore away from me.

"How can you say that?" I had obviously said the wrong thing. "I love Bridgette. But… If I had known…"

"You could not have known what would occur Bellamy. No one is capable of seeing that sort of thing. You chose to be with Bridgette, and gain more instruction for this job. That was the right thing to do. She is one of the very best Guardians we have."

Bellamy went quiet and pensive for a few minutes, so I stayed quiet too.

"Was she a Guardian?" She finally asked, but I had to question her in return.

"Who?"

"I was listening at the door when you and Yuri were talking." She admitted apologetically. "You were talking about losing a woman. Was Yuri in love with her? Who was she?"

"Her name was Katja. He knew her and was close with her after he moved to Kiev." I said, but knew that it was not my place to say anything more about Yuri and Katja. "The rest of your questions can only be answered by Yuri. You should ask him."

"Okay./" She agreed, startling me when she moved to her full length mirror. "But not looking like this." She turned back to me. "Why didn't you tell me I look this bad?"

"It is not possible for you to look bad." I kept my words light.

She brushed through her hair, pulling it up now that it had grown longer. She put on simple moisturizer and lip gloss before leaving her room. She was going to look for Yuri, and more than likely, he was already back on the first floor, preparing to start his shift.

BELLAMY:

Yuri wasn't in his room. I knocked and got no response at all. He wasn't anywhere on the third floor, so I instead chose to walk. I walked all eight floors aimlessly, learning the ins and outs of the building. Ten minutes later I was back on the first floor, being looked at by every other Guardian in the surrounding area.

"Bellamy." I heard my name said above all of the whispers

Stan was on his way over to me, a half smile on his face.

"Hello Stan."

The look in his eyes showed the same pity everyone else did.

"How…" He stopped short of questioning how I was doing, but considering my current appearance, he changed gears quickly. "It is good to see you back here." He started. "Why are you back here? I see you're a Guardian now." My status was again pointed out. "How did that occur? How does a seventeen-year old become a Guardian without…"

There were still a lot of questions being thrown around the Guardians here at the Academy. They were questions I either couldn't or wouldn't answer. And as it was, I could barely answer most of my own questions.

"It's a long story." I told Stan, changing the subject as best as I could. "Have you seen Yuri?"

"Tverskaya? I think he might still be outside. He is on the changing night and morning schedule, so…." Stan pointed out the doors.

"So, he'll be on duty any minute." I gathered.

Stan was very to the point, giving me the information I had questioned, before walking away. He made his way behind me, going to talk quietly with another Guardian who like others, watched me with wonder and question. I gave Stan a nod and walked outside into the cold night air. Yuri was off to my right, near the building curve. He was obviously talking to someone hidden around the side of the structure. I watched as he lowered his head, speaking quietly to whoever stood with him. Unfortunately, I was going to have to interrupt his conversation. I wanted to talk to him before he was on duty and I did not get the opportunity to. I had no clue as to how my own schedule would run for the next week, or then after, so now was as good a time as any.

"Yuri?" I approached him hesitantly, seeing is eyes go sharp and bright as his head turned to me. It was strange to see again.

"Bellamy." He too was pleased to see me out. Although, he also sounded shocked by my appearance in front of him.

"Can I talk to you when you have a few minutes?"

Yuri's eyes were caring. He looked to the Guardian around the hidden corner, taking a step towards me at the same time. ""Gabby, I will see you later."

Gabriella Durst was another recent transfer to the Academy, coming all the way from the dark and scary streets of New York. Her transfer had occurred months prior to my own, so she had been one of the Guardians who turned her back when a bunch of Moroi and Dhampir had run head first to those Strigoi. She also seemed to not be a friend of mine. Clearly I had already become a problem to her, and clearly the holes she tried drilling into me with her glare was over another Guardian.

"I wasn't trying to interrupt your discussion with Gabriella."

"It's fine Bellamy." Yuri brushed off the acknowledgment as we walked away from the building, into the center of the campus. "Gabby and I were just making plans to meet later."

"Oh." I caught the shift in my voice.

"I figured you would still be talking to Dimitri."

There was a lot of contempt in his own voice.

"Yuri, please don't be upset that I chose to talk to Dimitri privately before you. I have my reasons for the order."

His head tilted back to me, his eyes making their attempt to pull a complete answer from me.

"He lets me talk to him without a filter. I don't need to watch what I say or how I say it when I vent with him." I explained. "I like that. I need that."

"Is that what you pulled me away to talk about?"

"No." Admitting to Dimitri that I had been eavesdropping was far less of a task. There was no way around feeling more guilt, especially when I was planning on asking Yuri questions about his own personal life.

"You will be happy to know that I landed my round house kick-the one you taught me." I attempted to not only keep our conversation light, but avoid the uncomfortable questions I wanted to ask.

"Prove it." Yuri played along again. "When you are back to training in the gym, we'll go a few rounds and you can show me." He was looking right back at me. He winked, and I suddenly felt the pear-shape of my world temporarily become a circle, as my head went fuzzy.

"And still, I can't imagine this is what you want to say to me."

"Okay," I took a deep breath, pulling my arms around my ribs. "I heard you and Dimitri talking on the opposite side of my door earlier. You were talking about the woman that you lost; the one that you knew in Kiev. I thought you were Russian. What were you doing in Kiev?" Once I started, the questions just kept flowing out of me.

"Bellamy." He stopped me.

I took another breath. "Sorry. I asked Dimitri a few questions, but he thought I should ask you."

"What would you like to know first Bellamy?"

"What are you willing to tell me?" I returned. "I recognize that it is your personal life, so if I am being too intrusive, you may tell me to back off."

Yuri gave a low chuckle, his hand resting at my back as we walked slowly. "You're sweet Bellamy." He used that slow strange sensitivity in his voice again.

As a novice, I had not been exposed to the full extent of Yuri's flirtatious nature and unrestrained behavior. He flirted and I flirted, but then I was a novice. Now I was a week away from being eighteen and a full on officially sanctioned Guardian. At the same time however, the current level of flirtation shared between us was more of an understanding, an accord, a truce.

"A few years ago, I fell in love with Katja Gorchakova." Yuri started his story "She was beautiful, strong, so smart, she was in love with me, and she was about to become an incredible Guardian."

"What happened?"

"Strigoi." Yuri bitterly spoke. "A Strigoi took her younger sister, and Katja refused to accept such a bold attack on her family. She also refused to listen when everyone told her not to go after her; that her sister was dead." I saw the same pain in his eyes that I felt when thinking about my loss of Mason.

"She went?"

Yuri nodded. "She did. And I did not get to say goodbye to her either. She was killed before I could make her see reason. She was not ready." His eyes had since focused on the ground, but it did not stop him from getting worked up.

"I'm sorry."

""Believe me when I say that I understand what you are feeling Bellamy. /it happened four and a half years ago, and still I ache to remember her untimely death."

"I guess you do understand how I'm feeling." I could not ignore the shared tragedy between us.

His hand stayed at my back the entire time, his hand beginning to shake a little less as he revealed the truth of his own past to me. We made it to the student dorms before we had to separate. Yuri was on duty and I needed to get more rest before the following morning.

"I should let you get to your duties." I said. "I should sleep. I'll be up early to shadow Guardians throughout the day."

"That is right. Your shadowing begins tomorrow."

"Do you know who I am working with?"

"Me." Yuri said. "At least for a few hours. After that I believe you will be with Stan."

The following morning, I met Yuri just outside of the front gate . He handed me a tall cup of coffee, admiring my new uniform. Even I was feeling a bit taller and more confident wearing the Guardian uniform.

"Good morning." He smiled genuinely. "The new uniform looks good on you."

I returned his smile with my own. "Thank you." I stepped up beside him, ready to be shown the ropes of being an Academy Guardian.

"We are working the wall this morning." Yuri said, walking away from the gate I'd met him at, and much further out along forest perimeter. We were outside of the wards with no magical protection. Not that Strigoi would be attacking in daylight.

"The wall? That sounds like something connected to the Guardian course." I groaned miserably.

"It isn't." He laughed at me. "This is less of a wall and more of a tower." He pointed in the direction we were going.

I looked out further, but still couldn't see anything resembling a tower.

"We are going to be on threat watch this morning. All new Guardians are put on the wall their first day out."

"What? Why?" My hands found their way to my hips. "I'm not being put through some ridiculous or horrid Guardian hazing thing, am I?"

"No. The wall is simply a good way to get to know all of the seasoned Academy Guardians better."

"Promise?"

"Yes Bellamy. I promise."

I understood why Yuri had mentioned being on watch at the wall as a way of getting to know fellow Guardians. Once we ascended the tower, we were certainly in close proximity of one another. This area we guarded was the first point of any potential threat or battle. If anyone was going to try to get through to the school, they'd have to get by me and Yuri first. Daylight did not erase all danger.

The space we shared was intimate, for lack of a better word. We stood or sat in a small ten by ten space, on the lookout for anyone or anything.

"There is something out over there." I pointed to my right, watching a distinct rustling of bushes and plants.

Yuri stepped over to where I stood, standing close to me, his hand on my shoulder.

"It's probably just deer." He shrugged. "We see a lot of them here. They don't get too close to campus though."

"Good to know."

My first morning on duty was pretty uneventful so far. There was little to do but watch a quiet area, so Yuri and I did talk. We talked more about Mason until I could no longer stand to revisit happier memories. We talked about Katja for the same amount of time, and we talked much about England and Kiev. Yuri also knew about my fire ability, so there was that conversation. Sharing time with Yuri was easy. The time passed by quicker. We even got a visit from Dimitri, who had been desperate to check in on my first day progress, Alberta stopped by shortly to inform me again that I'd be working alongside Stan Alto in the afternoon. We even got an even shorter visit Gabriella. I received a look of undeserved contempt as she requested a conversation with Yuri just on the ledge outside of the door. Yuri stepped out with her, but the door and winds did little to hide their voices.

YURI:

"What are you doing?" She demanded to know without any sort of clarification to the subject. "She's seventeen. She's a child Yuri."

So, this conversation would be about Bellamy. Gabriella was jealous of Bellamy. I should've expected this. She had never once bitched at me when I flirted with other female Guardians. In the past many months, Gabriella and I had hooked up off and on-here and there-but, it did little more than give me temporary relief to the loss and broken-heartedness I had told Bellamy about.

I would admit to myself that Gabriella's jealousy was well-placed, but if she knew that, I would be in even more trouble. Bellamy was still seventeen. A week made little difference in the span of things in my book. I couldn't say or do anything that constituted any kind of advancement. I could flirt, and I did. In fact, that was how my attraction bloomed. It all started with the fact that I flirted with Bellamy Peace frequently. Who could really blame me for flirting with such an incredible girl? That flirtation soon turned to an infatuation. That I could not let on about. When that infatuation started, I found myself thinking of her more than I should, in ways that I should not. I had no idea how she felt about me. She had told me before she left St. Vladimir's that she had not taken our flirting seriously. She was difficult to read when it came to whether or not she was attracted to me.

All that known, I still had no intention of pushing her into anything at all. She was still mourning the loss of Mason Ashford, a man she was very much in love with. Pretending that she could feel anything for anyone right now, or a month from now, or six months from now, was unrealistic. And, to have even a shred of a chance at gaining her undivided attention, I would have to wait for her to be ready.

"You don't know what you are talking about Gabby." I felt indignant about her insinuation about me taking advantage of a seventeen-year old, despite what I may or may not have allowed to develop.

"You do Yuri." Gabriella accused. "And I promise you, if I see any inappropriate behavior between you two, I will not hesitate to report it."

"How dare you accuse me." I shot back at her, refusing to admit anything at all to her.

"Deny it all you like, but your dreams have betrayed you already." Her eyes were angry and disappointed. "It is her name that you have called while you slept. It was her face you wanted to see these last months, hoping for her return. By Vladimir, I pray that you do the right thing.' She turned away, going to leave, descending the ledge of the tower. "Remember what I have said."

Bellamy had heard my conversation. It would've been hard not to hear, but I could see question and more pain in her eyes.

"You heard?"

"Kind of impossible to ignore." Bellamy spoke. "Why does she think that you are interested in me? I've done nothing, and you are not the only Guardian who hoped for my return here. And even if you were attracted to me…"

"I am." I confessed to her, careful to keep my voice low. I closed the door all the way behind me. "I'm attracted to you Bellamy. There are so many reason to be, but I have no intention of acting on my attraction. You are mourning a lost love, and I will not try competing with that."

She took a step back as though my revelation had been a surprise to her. Surely it couldn't have been. She stayed quiet though, contemplating and considering all that had been said. When her time on the wall was up, she looked ready to leave. I stayed in the tower until my own time was up, following the same path I had taken out. As I walked slowly, my guard up, something ahead on the ground caught my eye. It was a folded piece of paper. It was small, but not small enough to go unnoticed. It read twelve am.. That was the time that Bellamy was off duty. I wasn't sure if the paper was written by Bellamy, but it had not been on the ground earlier. For all I knew, it could've been Gabriella wanting to meet and threaten me more. I let it go because I was tired and finally off duty. I made it to my room, falling onto my bed before setting my alarm clock for two.

BELLAMY:

A full week later, it was finally time. Tonight was the night. Not only was it my eighteenth birthday, it was also the night that I was going to become an official Guardian to a Moroi. I had been given a new uniform, separating me from Academy Guardians, even though I would still be on campus and continuing to assist with other duties. I slowly sat up as my alarm still sounded. The sun was not totally set yet. I still had a few hours of freedom left, so I slowly dragged myself from bed, and into a long hot shower.

When I had arrived at the Academy, I had been required to wear the obvious red band on my arm, while I shadowed other Guardians, showing that I was still training. But, training stopped tonight. I was now a Guardian, so as I dressed in my new uniform, pulling on my perfectly tailored jacket, I set my arm band on my nightstand. Clipping my hair up, I now allowed the molnija marks I wore to show. I now had two marks, thanks to my field training with Bridgette. I put on a little lip gloss and eyeliner, making sure again that everything was perfect.

I left my room with a renewed sense of motivation. I had a job to do tonight. I had to wear my façade as long as possible. As I descended the stairwells, on my way down to the first floor, I was not expecting Dimitri to run right into me.

"Bellamy." He reacted when he realized he'd crashed into someone.

"Hey Thor." I saw his eyes refocus. Something was off.

"You okay? You look a little…a lot pre-occupied."

"I'm fine Bellamy."

I lifted an eyebrow, wondering if I could get him to tell me what the problem was. He was not fine, and one thing I had noticed since my arrival back was Dimitri's new behavior. He did not reveal nearly as much as he used to. Much more than he said had occurred during my absence, and I could not pull it out of him. He had also become far more strict and rigid. I had always thought of Alberta as the most unyielding Guardian here, but Dimitri Belikov was beginning to rival her.

"He who says he is fine does not absently run into others."

Dimitri smirked. "Confucius?"

"Pearce." I corrected. "You have a look of either blind rage or blind fear."

"A bit of both." He said. "Alberta and I have to go to the Moroi Court to testify against Victor Dashkov."

"Oh." I'd heard about the reprehensible actions of Victor Dashkov before I had arrived, so I was able to sort of understand Dimitri's quandary. He had been one of the Guardians to rescue the Dragomir Princess, along with Rose Hathaway and Christian.

"Where are you off to?" He changed the subject.

"Kirova's office." I informed, attempting to subtly show that I no longer wore the red training band. "I am going to meet Howard and Ekaterina Zeklos before classes start for students tonight. By that point, Jesse Zeklos will have himself a new Guardian."

I saw Dimitri's eyes brighten with realization. "You are becoming a Zeklos Guardian." He gave a proud nod. "And I assume you have been informed about the new tattoo you will receive?"

"My promise mark? Yes, I'm getting it tonight."

"No." He leaned onto the wall at his left. "Not that tattoo. The Zeklos tattoo."

"Zeklos tattoo?" I crossed my arms over my chest. "I was not told anything about it. "

He didn't look too thrilled about my not being told this bit of information. "Bellamy, I don't want this to be sprung on you as a surprise, but every permanent Guardian for a Zeklos is given a tattoo that is sealed with whatever magic your Moroi practices. It bonds you together."

"Define bond Dimitri." I demanded.

"Because the tattoo is sealed by your Moroi's magic, it bonds you both emotionally to each other." He paused, opening his mouth to speak, but closing it before words came. "I don't know how to explain the bond to you Bellamy. It is something that must be experienced to fully understand, but I still think you should know what you are committing yourself to before the time comes."

I studied his face as he looked back at me. "I can handle this Dimitri."

"I do not doubt that." He agreed. "It's early. Are you going to Kirova's office right away? Right now?"

I shook my head this time. "No. I thought I might go to see Christian. If he will still want to see me."

"Are you ready for that?"

"No better time than the present. Plus, he is the only one I have purposely avoided seeing since my return. I saw Eddie on the same day I arrived, and I saw you, and…"I should've gone to see Christian too. That was my mistake. I do miss him."

"Go." Dimitri said then, sending me off as he continued his climb up the stairs.

CHRISTIAN:

I had been silently thinking about her for the last week. It was hard to believe that it had been a week since Mason's funeral; since Bellamy stepped back onto this campus. It was even harder to believe that it had been a full week since her arrival and she had not once tried to come and see me or talk to me. The Academy Guardians would not let me through their muscled walls to see her, so the ball as they say was still in her court. I had visited the church attic nearly every night in hopes of her coming to see me. It was seriously starting to feel as if she was avoiding me on purpose. It was bad enough that she may or may not have been avoiding me, but on top of that, Lissa was on guard and questioning me about Bellamy. We were hanging out together after classes, walking slowly towards our dorms. Bellamy was standing guard at the Moroi dorms alongside Alberta Petrov. Alberta was giving some sort of instruction when Bellamy looked over. I saw her take that deep breath before turning back to Alberta.

"Are you ever going to explain how you know that girl?" Lissa used her most trenchant tone.

"She's a Guardian." I evaded, but not very well.

"A Guardian you seem to know well. How well do you know her? Were you…"

"We were friends. We are friends. But over the months that she was a novice here, I started to feel more. She was with Mason, but I still felt…"

"Do you still have feelings for her Christian?" There was rejection and sadness in her voice at the possibility of me having feelings for anyone but her. It was not possible.

"Not in the way I do for you Lissa. I only love you." I kissed her sweetly as we kept walking.

"Will you see her?"

"She is my friend, so I need to see her at some point." The sadness returned. "Would you like to meet her?"

Did I really just offer to introduce my current girlfriend to my…well, I guess I considered Bellamy both friend and ex?

"She is a Guardian." Lissa calmly justified meeting Bellamy. "I suppose I should meet her too."

"Without my friendship with Bellamy, I doubt that you and I would be here together right now. She made me rethink so much that I had hidden. It is because of her that I realized not everyone will judge first and question later."

"Then I definitely think I should meet her, and thank her."

Now, as Lissa and I stood just outside of the church with Eddie Castille, I saw his eyes light up. He smiled brightly and I knew there could only be one reason for that look on his face.

"Bells!" He moved through me and Lissa, running to pick the girl up into his arms, spinning her around in circles as he hugged her. The pair talked quietly for a few minutes before I saw Eddie motion to me and Lissa. This time though, she took that same deep breath, but nodded, taking Eddie's hand, led over to us.

"Hey Christian." She sounded timid for the first time since I had met her. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too." I took a step towards her, seeing her hesitate. Her eyes went to Lissa, and were followed by mine.

"Bellamy Pearce, this is …"

"Vasilissa Dragomir." Lissa used her full name.

"The Dragomir Princess." She realized. "It is so good to meet you." Bellamy greeted her completely. "I can't thank you enough for coming into Christian's life. I've been able to be a bystander to your relationship in the last week, and I have never seen him so happy."

"Christian says it is thanks to you that he and I are even together. He says that if not for you, he would not trust or be as open as he has become." Lissa mentioned, her eyes still scrutinizing Bellamy.

"No." I heard "Christian gives me far too much credit there. It was his choice to open his heart to a friendship with me and a relationship with you."

"And when you two say friendship, what exactly does that mean?" Bellamy smiled as sweetly as ever. "You have nothing to worry about Princess." She kept our secrets.

"But he said that you two are very connected. He wouldn't elaborate."

"Lissa." I tried to stop her from prying into Bellamy's personal life. It was not fair to Bellamy.

"It's fine Chris." Bellamy gave another look that made me step back. I feared she might let something about her fire magic slip. She turned back to Lissa. "Christian and I do have a pretty strong connection in our friendship." I saw her hand touch to the back of her neck again. We were both raised by our aunts, because my mother as well made the choice when I was young, to willingly be turned to Strigoi."

I saw Lissa eyes go wide. It was not an answer she was expecting to hear from Bellamy.

"I would love to stand here all night talking and catching up, but I am on duty in awhile, and you three have classes soon."

I smirked before she could walk away, keeping her curious as to what was going through my head. "About that Bells." I stopped her.

"Don't ask Christian. I will explain it all someday soon, but for now let's just accept it and move on."

"Fair enough." I told her, I knew I couldn't push her too far yet. The look of loss was still present in her eyes. I wondered if her becoming a Guardian this soon had anything to do with Mason or with his death.

"Will you at least tell us who you have been assigned to" Eddie piped up again, "or are you an Academy Guardian? An instructor?"

She winced, leaning back onto her heels slightly, clasping her hands in front of her. "Jesse.' She said the name of her new Moroi.

"The only Jesse I know is…"

"Jesse Zeklos." Bellamy confirmed.

"That's not possible." I growled, my arm already back around Lissa, pulling her up to my side. "After he hurt you, that shouldn't be possible."

"I told you it is a long story Christian."

"So we let it go?"

"For now." She winked.

"Can't believe you are protecting that arrogant, self-righteous jerk." I made my opinion clear. "You didn't promise to die for him, did you?"

"Well, that's the thing about becoming someone's Guardian Christian. It's a given that we will sacrifice our lives for theirs, so if I ever have to, I will. Now, do not be late for class."

"See you Bells." Eddie stated.

"She smiled

BELLAMY:

"Happy Birthday, Bellamy." Yuri strolled up on my right, his arm thrown around me immediately. "You are looking especially radiant this evening." He complimented. I was in nothing more than my uniform, but I still could not help but enjoy his compliment. "Are you on your way to the Guardian meeting too? I will walk with you."

He was referring to the meetings we as Guardians were required to attend each evening before school began, and before the new night and day shifts started.

"Nope." I shook my head. "I get a pass on this one. I have something more important to face first."

"Oh yes." His arm shifted =. "You become official Guardian to your Moroi tonight." There was a slight pause in conversation as Yuri cleared his throat. "We should celebrate. How about a round of pool tomorrow. Noon?"

I creased my brow and pursed my lips in a strict refusal.

"Okay, let me put it this way." Yuri went on. "You don't have much choice in the matter. You are a new Guardian here and it would be irresponsible of us not to properly welcome you into the fold."

I gave a laugh that sounded more like a scoff. "What exactly does being properly welcomed entail?"

Yuri was getting far too much enjoyment out of this. "After you get off duty, and your Moroi is asleep, get some rest. Be ready by noon, because we are going to play a few games of pool."

I had never played pool, but as far as Guardian get togethers in the afternoon, this sounded fun. At least I wasn't running an obstacle course this time.

"Okay." I agreed. "It sounds fun."

"See you then."

I arrived at Kirova's office shortly after Yuri had run off. The sun was set and I figured I was still early, but as I closed in on the Headmistress's doors, I heard voices talking together. I moved closer to see that Jesse's parents had also arrived early.

"Bellamy Pearce." Headmistress Kirova acknowledged, "come in please."

I entered the room, receiving the expected glances of shock from Jesse's mum and dad. It was the same look of shock I had received from multiple Guardians upon my arrival. I had just turned eighteen today, but I still looked younger. But, looks could be deceiving.

"The Guardian Council expects our son to be guarded by a child? Have they resorted to sending children into the field already?"

"I assure you that Bellamy Pearce is more than qualified to hold her title. She was one of our top students before she left, and she already has more field experience than the novices who are awaiting graduation." Kirova's high recommendation and praise was a far cry from the admonishment she'd had for me before I left St. Vladimir's as a novice.

"Ellen," Jesse's mother, Ekaterina Zeklos used the woman's first name with a hint of haughty derision. I saw where Jesse had gained his vision of self-importance, "may we speak with Guardian Pearce privately for just a moment?"

"Of course." Headmistress Kirova immediately rounded her desk, leaving her office; leaving me on my own with these people. It was like leaving a small animal in a pen full of wolves.

"Sit please, Guardian Pearce." Ekaterina nicely offered.

She sat across from me, her hands folding in her lap delicately, and I had dark visions of Dacia Marovici in the same office. Now, as a Guardian, I was less of a threat and less likely to be threatened. I wondered if that was ultimately the reason why the Council decided to make me a Guardian early. I shook off the memory of Davia and made myself concentrate.

"Please, call me Bellamy." I offered in return. Guardian Pearce sounded so formal and disarming.

"Is it true that your aunt Bridgette was among the Guardian Council seats for years before forfeiting her position?" Ekaterina asked.

"Yes." I answered her. "Bridgette surrendered her chair for my sake. She was protecting me from the Council."

"The Council that you were able to reveal for their darkness?"

I nodded.

"This is ridiculous Katerina. Why should we consider allowing her to be his Guardian? How can we be sure she will not be like all of the others?"

My eyes went to where Howard Zeklos stood by the window, his arm crossed over his chest, and his head over-reachingly high as he stared out the window into darkness.

"With all due respect Sir," I was not aware this would be an interview process beforehand, but I hoped I could handle it well enough, "I believe that all of the other Guardians Jesse has gone through have far more experience than me. But all of those other Guardians were afraid to tell Jesse no. I am not. All of those other Guardians failed to set boundaries for Jesses. I don't think that your issue is with my being like all of the others. If you thought I couldn't do this job; if you thought I couldn't protect Jesse properly, I would not have gotten this far." I was well into a justification of why I was more qualified, actually selling myself on being Jesse's Guardian. There had to be something wrong with me.

"I can sit here and detail all of my field experience, and talk about the Strigoi I have killed, but that doesn't seem to be what you are looking for. You want to know that I will give my life for his, and that I will stand between him and any enemy, seen or unseen."

I saw Howard Zeklos crack a smile before twisting around to look at his wife.

"I like her." He said.

"She is smart and quite wise for someone so young." Ekaterina added. "Dimitri said you would be a good fit for our Jesse, and he was right."

"You talked to Dimitri?"

"Guardian Belikov is family. He always will be."

It was a nice thing to hear that the Zeklos family still held Dimitri in high regard. We were interrupted by a loud knock on the door as Jesse stepped in, followed by the Headmistress.

"Jesse!" His mother exclaimed, standing to greet her son. "My darling boy."

"Hello mother." Jesse affectionately said. I'd never heard the soft tone in him. It threw me off again.

"Jesse." Howard also greeted, walking to where Jesse stood beside Ekaterina.. I heard Jesse's usual expected demeanor return. "I would like you to meet your new Guardian. I suggest you keep this one."

"Like I have a choice." Jesse mumbled as I stood, turning to face him.

"You will not receive another." Howard finished.

I wanted to laugh out loud, watching the look shift on Jesse's face.

"You are my Guardian?" He was completely and utterly floored by my presence. I had rendered Jesse Zeklos nearly speechless. "That's not possible." He went on as though a joke was being played at his expense. "I cannot be assigned a novice. She can't guard me until she graduates."

"I am no novice." I immediately cleared up the fact with him. "As of this morning, I am also no longer a Guardian in training either. I am your Guardian and I am about to swear my life to yours. I'm about to make a very smart decision, or a very very horrible one."

"You are my Guardian." Now he was amused by the idea, and change coming to both of our lives.

Oh yeah. I was going to regret this soon enough. That beach idea was sounding better and better every passing second.

"Are you ready to receive your mark and make your promises?" Ekaterina turned to question me.

I was scared. There was no other word that could describe this moment or this feeling of dread. I was going to swear myself to Jesse. I was going to be responsible for keeping this troublemaking lothario alive and out of trouble. I could literally feel my heart beating and racing in my chest, my breathing was on the verge of becoming erratic, and my head was pounding with doubt. I looked over to Jesse and found him looking equally as nervous as me. If there was one thing that I knew for sure in this situation, it was that there could be no fear or nerves for either of us foing in to this big of a commitment.

"Before we go through all of this, can Jesse and I have a few minutes to talk?"

Both Ekaterina and the Headmistress smiled at us, giving their permission, but Jesse's father said nothing either way.

"Jesse?" I motioned to the door. , turning to the others as Jesse walked over to the exit. "We will not be long."

Jesse and I walked in silence until we were outside of the building, the darkness of the night now enveloping us as we stood.

"We need to talk about this Jesse. We need to seriously discuss what is about to go down in that room up there." I stated, watching him place his hands into his pockets apprehensively and even undecidedly. "If this here," I motioned a hand between the two of us, "is going to work out, we need to trust each other. You need to know that I've got your back, and I need to know that you know I have your back." I paused. "And before you answer, I don't want to hear any jokes from you about having your front. I'm not in a joking mood."

Jesse laughed, knowing that I had stopped any ridiculous, inappropriate, or unnecessary comment he had waiting.

"This might actually turn out to be a great working relationship after all." Jesse said. "At the very least, it'll be entertaining."

"So, we are doing this? I'm going to be your Guardian?"

"Yes Bellamy. We are doing this."