Every time I write a chapter on this story, I have to depress myself for a few minutes before I can truly add to it. If I don't, I have to go back and edit it. I want the readers to feel the pain the characters feel. Does it work? I really hope so! D: On with the (depressing) story~!

Overwhelmed

"I'm sorry."

Why? Why are you sorry?

"Izaya...stop saying that..."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry...Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry..." The raven was still sopping wet, on the floor in a ball. He was rocking back and forth, holding himself around the arms. Shizuo was kneeling in front of him.

"Stop. Stop! Izaya, fucking look at me!"

"So sorry...So sorry..."

Izaya was whimpering, crying feebly. He kept mumbling apologies to the frazzled blond. He was sorry for worrying him...sorry for making him leave the party...sorry for making him fall in love with such an unworthy specimen...but most of all...

"I'm sorry I'm not perfect... I'm sorry!" He yanked his hair again, hard enough so that it was in danger of being ripped out.

"Stop it! You're scaring the hell outta me! Just...calm down alright? Please...I need you to get a grip..." Shizuo pleaded, unsure of what to do.

All he wanted to do was help. He wanted to help the raven like he had helped him. But he had no idea how to do it. He just knew that if Shinra got a hold of him, he might not ever be released. Shizuo couldn't be alone anymore... They were in this together.

"I'm trying...I'm trying..." Izaya whimpered, taking deep breaths. Shizuo ran his hands along the smaller man's spine, trying to soothe him.

What if...he couldn't find his way back this time? What if that edge Roppi warned him about was here? What would he do? What could he do? He... He needed Tsugaru. He needed Delic. Tsuki... He needed someone to tell him everything would be alright, dammit! But...

There was only silence...

Silence filled with the whimpers of the broken man before him.

"I'm so sorry, Shizu-chan... I'm so sorry..."

Shizuo sighed, angrily yanking on his own golden locks in frustration. How could he fix this? Izaya Orihara never said sorry. He never cried. He never broke down. But here he was, faced with the inevitable mental breakdown that was happening before him. He knew it was coming...but he...he needed more time...

Please...

Please...

PLEASE!

The raven's phone was ringing; they both ignored it. Then Shizuo's phone rang. They ignored that too. The only things in their minds were the rocking motions the raven was doing and the harsh panting Shizuo was exhibiting. There was only them. There was only the monster and the flea. That's all there had ever been. The others... They were just alternates of the original forms... They weren't real. They weren't real.

"Izaya... Izaya Orihara. That's who you are. No Psyche. No Hibiya. No Roppi. You're only Izaya. I need you to remember that..." Shizuo whispered, pulling the man's face from his hands.

"No... I'm nobody...I'm everybody... It's all at once, Shizu-chan. It's all up here," Izaya responded, pointing to his head. "They're everywhere now. I can't shut them up anymore."

"Are...you admitting you need help? Are you saying you can't fix this? You never had control over it?" Shizuo asked, knowing the answer. Still...he wanted the raven to laugh at him. To hit him lightly on the arm and make fun of him... Like always...

Like the old Izaya...

"Silly brute... I never had control over it. I see that now... My entire existence is a lie. I'm such a good informant, aren't I, Shizu-chan? I lie so well that I can lie to myself. I've been made a fool of. I can't- I can't go back...to how things were..."

Shizuo's heart dropped.

"I don't want to return to how things were, stupid! I don't want to have you setting me up all the time! I don't want to throw street signs at you and chase you around the city! I want to stay with you like this! Like...like a couple..." the blond shouted, angry and sad all at once. He couldn't bear this...

"Shhh. It's alright. We're alright. There's only this right now... Everything else will come later..." Izaya drawled, leaning forward and pulling the taller man to the floor with him. They were lying on the hard surface, tangled in each other.

"I love you, Izaya," Shizuo whispered to the ceiling.

"I know you do. Now shush. Just keep living in this moment with me. We may not have much time together anymore..." Izaya responded, his voice frail.

"If- if we had never been crazy... If we had just kept chasing each other around Ikebukuro, would we still be here? If I had asked you on a legitimate date, would you have gone?" Shizuo inquired. It was a stupid question, but any time that was spent keeping Izaya grounded was worth the ridicule he may receive.

"Haha, of course not. I would have met you, but only to tease you. Maybe we could've had a one night stand... That would've been good for you," Izaya laughed. "Of course, I could never truly leave you alone... Even if you wanted to leave, and forget about me, I'd follow you. That's just how I am. I'm stingy with my toys."

Shizuo nuzzled against his hair, inhaling the scent that was purely Izaya. The smell he used to hate. Just like the man in his arms. The man he used to hate. So much had changed in such little time. More was changing. Everything he had gained was being taken from him.

"I'm your toy? That makes sense..."

"You're my favorite toy. My favorite monster. My only sanity," Izaya whispered, his eyes focused on the ceiling.

Vaguely, they could hear the storm that was still assaulting the city outside. The sounds of cars running through puddles and people running from the moisture filled the night.

"Do you believe in coincidence?' Izaya asked suddenly.

"Coincidence?"

"We met back in high school. We were in 'hate at first sight' with each other. You spent every day almost for eight years chasing me. Now, you caught me, and it ended up like this. Coincidence? Fate?"

"I don't give a fuck. I hate all that stupid fate crap. We're like this because we choose to be," Shizuo huffed.

"Karma then? Because I ruined so many lives, my payback is to lose my mind? No, that's not good enough...There would be no reason to put you through this. You've never done anything to have your karma turned against you," Izaya mused.

"I beat people up for my paycheck. I'm just as guilty as you."

There was a peaceful silence around them again. The rain continued outside, and the city continued to thrive despite the weather. Izaya began to absently hum a tune that Shizuo didn't recognize.

"Do...you feel better?" Shizuo asked. The humming stopped.

"My wounds have a Band-Aid on them, but are far from healed. For the moment, my episode is coming to a close. As for right now, I'm still unstable. But, it will be alright. Everything will be alright. Everything..."

And the humming started again. Shizuo knew that the raven's grip on reality was slipping despite his words that he was almost better again. There was unimaginable pain in his chest. Pain that he hadn't felt since...he hurt that woman so long ago.

"You're alright. Everything's alright. Nothing else can happen tonight... It's only us now, Shizu-chan," Izaya hummed absently.

Why was he saying such random things? Was he comforting himself? Or...trying to comfort the blond? But why would he be trying to comfort Shizuo?

"Shizu-chan... You're going to be fine. Relax."

"What are you-" Shizuo began, but then he heard it. The cracking in his voice. And he realized, he was crying again.

"Shhh. We're fine. We're perfect, together. We're complete... We're safe from the storm."

Did he mean the storm outside or the storm in his mind?

"I know. I know that..." Shizuo responded, pulling him closer.

"Shhhh. Let's go to sleep. And in the morning, everything will be different. It will be sunny outside, and we'll feel better," Izaya mumbled, his eyes glazing over again.

"No. No! I want to stay awake with you! Izaya, don't go to sleep yet! I don't know... If you'll be yourself when you wake up..."

"Silly... I told you I'm nobody. Anyone I wake up as will be me. Like that old Beatles song... How did it go?"

"Izaya..."

"I am he, as you are he, as you are me…"

"Izaya."

"And we are all together~."

"Shut up for a second! Damn your incessant babbling!" Shizuo sighed, gritting his teeth.

"Heh… Despite your sudden agitation with me...at least I stopped your tears…" Izaya hummed again, reaching his hands toward the ceiling.

"What are you doing?" Shizuo asked, watching the raven's fingers flex, obviously trying to grab something.

"I see the threads…They're rather beautiful, don't you agree?"

"I…can't see anything…" Shizuo admitted.

"What a shame. You would think they were beautiful. There's one tied to you. Did you know that? It's red. It's tied to your pointer finger, and it's attached to mine at the other end. We're connected." Izaya moved his hands around through the air.

"Red thread? But that means…"

"I know what it means, Shizu-chan. It's alright. If this is how everything turned out, it's alright…" The raven dropped his hands, linking one of them with Shizuo's.

Their eyes met once more. The blond could tell that his flea was almost out of it again. He leaned over and kissed the smaller man, telling him it would be alright. Izaya smiled.

"Shizu-chan… Did you know… There's no one I would rather be tied to…than you…" Izaya purred, his eyes closing as he spoke.

"I love you," Shizuo whispered.

"Shhhh. Sleep time…"

"Izaya… Look at me…" Shizuo pleaded. Izaya opened a hazy eye to observe the brute's face.

"I love you," Shizuo said again, looking at the smaller man directly.

"Of course you do… You're tied to me. Now sleep."

"Do…you think you can ever…love me too?"

"Shhh…" Izaya hushed, his eyes closed again.

Shizuo stared at the roof again, feeling the raven's body slacken against him. His breathing was even and his head rolled over. Mocha eyes watched his sleeping face, blinking tears away before he resumed to angrily glare at the ceiling. If this was karma…

Then karma truly was a bitch.

"I'm…the one who's sorry…"

Sachi: Short, chapter is short. I'm working on my comic book tonight, and I think I'll add another chapter to my other fiction. Plus, I may draw a Tsukioppi picture! Ah, I've never done one! Excitement!

Psyche: So…Am I going to have any more lines? I feel underappreciated as a character…

Sachi: Psyche, dear…You will have your moment in the sun. Patience is a virtue!

Psyche: I didn't know patience could have sex to begin with…

Sachi:…

Tsugaru: Virtue, Psyche. Not virgin.

Sachi: *hits self*

(Reviews are loved as always~!)