Emma

In a way things were worse now, tense and awkward. The first time they saw one another post the sex, they had simply stood across from one another, frozen in the foyer and unsure of what to say. Their eyes had uncomfortably darted to the other one and away every few seconds, their mouths opening to speak and then closing again as they struggled. It was clear that neither really wanted to face the other one and whether out of embarrassment, sadness, or anger, they simply decided without ever discussing it that... they wouldn't. The first visit was awkwardly detached, the second a little more and by the third a new pattern began. Suddenly they were acting like separated wives.

Every other night Emma would feed the two remaining children dinner and then would go about her household duties while Regina spent time with Ollie and Bonnie, Henry absent. They said very little to one another, but what they did say was stiffly polite and always about the kids.

Actually, maybe the truth was that things were easier now. They could talk... kind of. They sent text messages back and forth about the children's schedule and any complications. They did not speak of their mistake and they did not speak about themselves as a couple.

Instead, Emma got Bonnie and Ollie ready on Friday afternoons and Regina would appear, give a polite, no eye contact nod to Emma and Emma would give her a-hands-in-pockets shrug. Regina would then load up with the bags and Emma would help strap Bonnie into her car seat, as polite as can be. Regina would somewhat stiffly tell her of the plans for the next few days or if anything had happened with Henry. Emma would nod and thank her for her consideration and information. Regina would nod again and then when they couldn't handle the awkward tension anymore, Regina would get into the car and leave.

God, as much as Emma hated to say it... it was easier like this. Both of them knew what was happening with their children at all times. They had a way to communicate now. And there was no pressure to talk about them – the elusive and nauseating them because it was clear that neither wanted to.

Emma began to fall into the swing of things and it was only late at night after reading her books and sleeping in her bed - which felt so large and empty - that Emma would grow lonely and worry about what this new approach meant for them.

It had been easy not to worry much before because they had been sitting stagnant, not moving backward or forward. But they were definitely moving now. Whether they were moving backward or forward was hard to say. She supposed it depended on what she wanted as an end result.

Either way Emma found a new normal.

And with the new normal came new thoughts.

She had spent the last hour and a half at Costco, though with two people out of the house she wasn't sure why. The toilet paper didn't go half as fast and there was no need to stock up on food in bulk since her teenage vacuum was vacuuming at Granny's now.

She loaded in the car and then with a high five she and Ollie headed to their last errand, clothing shopping for Ollie.

His hair had grown past shaggy now and was almost to his shoulders. Honestly watching him flit between the stacks of clothes in the little girls section didn't seem to surprise anyone anymore because these days he genuinely looked the part.

The daily spasms of pain in Emma's chest were finally beginning to lighten. She wasn't thinking about Regina any less - or Mal - but her new no contact stance with her wife seemed to make it easier for her to push the pain away.

Still, watching Ollie dig through a rack of dresses, Emma felt a spasm so sharp that it made her gasp and clutch her chest. He had gone right back to his preferred way of dress the moment that Mal had left their house but...

She had a feeling that she was going to have to address this soon, just to find out if there was anything new on the Ollie-likes-dresses-and-long-hair front. Did he still want to be called her son?

The thing was, shouldn't Regina be part of that conversation as well? She always had been in the past. They had been very important moments.

Ollie squealed happily as he pulled out a skirt that he liked and ran over to the mirror to look, shoving his hair out of his eyes as he went.

Emma was beginning to think she needed to teach Ollie how to handle his hair, which while chestnut like Regina's was beginning to curl like Emma's. Perhaps, though he was young, the time had come to begin to teach him slowly of products and curling techniques but would his other mother feel she should be involved? How could they do that?

This shit was complicated.

They needed to start thinking about Ollie's birthday too. Perhaps they could talk about this then as well.

Ollie came skipping back to her with a giant grin on his face and holding a very cute blue and white polka dot dress.

Crap.

Emma took a deep breath and held it for a moment, thinking quick.

She and Regina had originally agreed that Ollie could wear girl's clothes as long as it wasn't as feminine as dresses. Storybrooke could handle flats and blouses but dresses seemed to cause problems.

And he knew that.

She bent down to his level and sighed. "Ollie, do you remember when we let you wear a dress to school before?"

He nodded, his face already clouding over. He looked so disappointed at the 'no' that was coming that Emma couldn't say what she had planned. She opened her mouth and instead came, "Do you understand that if we buy that for you, then people might not be nice to you? Like last time?"

He nodded, his little brown eyes that looked so much like his mother's suddenly looking older and wiser. "They don't understand me."

She kissed his cheek. "And that's their loss."

He smiled a little.

"Do you really want the dress?"

"I want to be pretty, Mommy."

She caressed his cheek and sent out a silent prayer for her child. "You are pretty, sweet pea."

They joined the checkout line with the dress, a headband, a new pair of sparkly flats, a pair of sneakers, more leggings, some jeans, a handful of tee shirts, a few blouses, and a cardigan for when school began.

She was changing a rule that she and Regina had established but maybe that was just how it would be from now on. Emma was missing out on Henry's life, left out of a large chunk of the decision making, and Regina was left out of it for Ollie and Bonnie.

Emma's stomach boiled thinking about it.

"What do you want to do for dinner?" she asked him as they stood waiting.

"Can we have it with Mommy?"

"Not tonight, sweet pea."

"But we have to go pick up Bonnie, right?"

She stroked his head and avoided his question. "Let's do something different. Do you want to make pizzas?"

"No, soup! Lets - AAWK!"

"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!" A woman had come out of nowhere, barreling into Emma and nearly knocking she and Ollie to the ground.

"It's all right. Are you okay?" She asked, pulling the blonde up.

The woman was slightly breathless for just a moment as Emma lifted her one handed with no concern.

"Yeah, uh, yeah. Sorry."

She began gathering her things off the floor and feeling a little stupid, Emma dipped down to help, distinctly fuzzy headed. What was wrong with her?

"I love my children," the blonde sighed, "but I'm pretty sure that they are trying to kill me most of the time."

The littlest one, the one she had clearly tripped over, frowned and apologized again in a squeaky voice.

"It's a secret plot." Emma said and then felt all the more stupid. "My youngest likes to get underfoot as well."

"Anyway." The woman huffed, eyes wide and offered her hand. "Emily."

"Uh hi. Emma."

"Oh, that's such a cute little dress!" Emily pointed out Ollie's blue and white polka dot.

"I get to wear it when I'm at home!" Ollie chirped, sounding much more his age than he normally did.

"You do?" Emily laughed.

Emma's nerves steeled, ready to defend her son as she saw comprehension flash over Emily's face, but Emily only said, "That dress will look so pretty with your hair!"

Ollie beamed.

"Did you hurt yourself?" Emma asked, noticing her elbow was skinned.

"Nah, I'm okay."

They began to talk about their children and the hazards of shopping with them as the line slowly moved.

It was nothing important and yet when Emma got back into her car with Ollie securely in the back seat, she was troubled.

What was it?

The woman had been nice... very nice.. and attractive... hot even. Was it just that she was uncomfortable seeing anyone other than her wife as attractive? She was allowed to do that now, right? Separations usually involved dating, right? Or was that separating... not separation? Was there a difference? And if there was, then which were they doing?

But that wasn't what was bothering her, was it? No, it had been something else. She didn't figure it out until they were home and the groceries had been put away.

The woman had been hot. Like... really hot. Her hair had been short but fluffed into a subtly cute puff, her jeans had been low riding and appropriate, her tank top slim and flattering. Her makeup hadn't been heavy but it had been there, warming her eyes and her cheeks, and when Emma had been helping her to her feet she had caught a whiff of perfume. …But she had also had four kids with her, all which looked too much like her to not be her kids. Feeling unsettled, she glanced in the mirror that Regina had once used to write words across herself.

Her hair was all right, pulled back in the usual ponytail after the curls had been brushed out and hidden away. Whatever, that just showed that she had been busy this morning, which was true since she was a mom. She was always busy even sans one child.

Her shirt was fine, a typical if not slightly baggy tee. She had always filled it better when her muscles had been large and rippling but who had time for that kind of workout?

Her pants were also a bit too large. It wasn't that she had huge thighs previously or anything but they had been strong... but -

But that woman was a mom too... clearly.

And she had been hot.

Disconcerted she picked up her phone and sent a text message. "I could use a girl's night out next week. Any takers?"

Mary-Margaret, Belle, and Ruby all agreed.

She found herself paying more attention to women over the next few days, even more so when she knew they were also mothers.

Emma and Regina had laughed at first about the 'mom effect' but Emma was sure that they had both thought it inevitable previously.

So if that was true, then why did the woman over there have a newborn and yet sultry smoky eye makeup... or that woman have the ass of a god and twin toddlers?

Was this just the stupid influence of all the books or was it real?

She was beginning to wonder...

Regina showed up mid-morning and Emma couldn't help it, she studied her too.

She still hadn't gone back to her frumpy shapeless clothes. As a matter of fact, she was currently in a comfortable but professional sleeveless dress and heels.

Then again she only had a teenager on a daily basis.

"What?" Regina finally asked, a bit sharply and Emma jumped. She had been staring while she thought.

"Uh, sorry, zoning."

"Hi, Mommy!" Ollie was skipping down the stairs.

Regina's eyebrow rose and she turned ever so slightly to Emma.

Emma flushed. She had forgotten to warn Regina about the dress. "He uh, he really wanted it."

"Uh-huh."

Emma knew in the old days she would have called her a softie or made fun of her in some way. Now Regina just coldly nodded.

"Don't you think we should have discussed this?" Regina's voice was dry, clearly trying to hide her annoyance.

Emma shrugged, feeling defiance rise. "You weren't there." Regina's mouth popped open, but Emma cut her off. "Sweet pea, can you grab your sister's bag from the living room, please?"

While he was gone Emma took the chance, "Listen," she said with her hands in her pockets and studying the banister in great detail. She wasn't sure how they were going to pull this off. "I'm sorry if you're offended, but you weren't there. That's how it goes now, right? You weren't there, so I made a decision. He only gets to wear it when he's going to be staying inside... for now." She couldn't tell if Regna looked hurt or furious. "I'm not saying that we're not going to talk about it. But I talked to him about it and he understands there will be consequences. Either way, I think we need to talk to him about it but, uh, not today."

"If something happens-"

"Well, good thing he will be with his mother so she can stop it. Moving - on. We also have to talk about Ollie's birthday soon. I know you like to get a good head start."

"Oh yes, I suppose we do," Regina said, her anger quickly drowning under the awkward pressure and turning to formal politeness again.

"I got it!" Ollie scurried back to the foyer, pulling a teetering Bonnie with him.

"Yeah, so I'll email you?" Emma finished.

"Email. Yes, that is a very good idea."

"Okay, cool."

Emma cleared her throat, studying the banister again while Regina seemed to be appraising her purse.

"All right then. I will have them back Monday morning," Regina finally said with a nod.

"Okay." She kissed her kids and waved.

Email. That was how they would make this work. Email.

Yikes.