Everything was so blurry, like I was on a heavy trip and my eyes felt like lead. I rolled over in the hard, but familiar bed and tried hard to make sense of where I was. Unable to even open my eyes. I scratched at the inherent itchiness above my brow line and listened hard to the dim sounds I assumed were coming from the bright light I could see through my eyelids above me.

My pants were damp and my legs stung with the urine I was certain lay crusted on them. I could tell I'd been drugged, sedated in some way... A feeling far too comforting and familiar. The room reeked of my sweat, blood and piss but I could feel myself coming back, slowly but surely. I heard myself sniffle loudly twice but I couldn't feel my face move with it and it confused the fuck out of me. I grunted and rolled over trying to piece everything together in my head. Where the fuck am "Franky, can you hear me?" I nearly jumped out of my skin. Maybe it wasn't me that had sniffled...

I shuttered open my eyes only to be overcome by the overwhelming need to scrunch them shut again in one tight, swift motion. "hmmmphh" I moaned realizing my body stung with contorted, bruised muscles. "Fuck me hey? Who's there?" I rasped directing my voice at the grate in the wall.

I heard her clear her throat and shuffle close to the grate. My eyes were wide open and instantly I realized where I was. "Fuckin slot... really?" I pushed my arse up as close to the wall as I could on the floor and whispered through the grate realizing who I was talking to. "Stella? " I questioned pointedly. "Yeh Franks, it's me... Are you okay?" She sounded concerned and shy but it was the last thing I wanted to hear in her voice. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?! and why the hell are you in the slot Stell ? Doing Blow I reckon hmm!?" I could hear her blow air out of her lips and sigh. I held my lips taught and bit the inside to hold them in position so I wouldn't mirror her. I'm my own fuckin person...

"Yeah actually, but I only got slotted for making a scene... I got thrown in here on purpose Franky I needed to know you were okay..." I cut her off. "Stell I don't need you checkin up on me , I can take care of meself. Did four fuckin years in here 'memba? How the hell are you fairing anyway miss hand of justice herself...I know you've been getting visits from the blow fairy." She was alarmingly still and quiet. I filled the silence clicking my tongue while I waited.

"You connected Bea didn't ya...?" She sounded hurt. "yeah. She called me when she realized who you were. She was pissed you wanted her in on the drugs Stell... I told her I'd handle it. didn't want you on any laced shit... didn't want you on anything but hmmm I know you're Ms. Crooked Cop herself so... I helped. I hope you're fucking happy. I'm already facing a shit load of possible time and now I might go down for your drug connections too since you've been slotted!"

She spoke quickly tripping over her words like I did when I was angry but she just sounded torn up inside. "They won't know Franky I..."

"What kind of TR cop are you Stell?! Hey, you're my fucking twin sister and they know I'm the King fucking Pin for getting drugs into Wentworth. Don't you think they'll figure that shit out? Or are you so off your face you've lost ya fuckin head?!"

I heard her breathe in hard against the grate. I'd hurt her feelings but if I knew her at all she wasn't going to let it knock her down. We were far from identical in nature but she held enough of my essence for me to predict her pretty well.

"Franky I put my fuckin neck on the line for you! I saw you come in here, struggle to get loose from the 3 guards at your side and I knew what you'd done cuz fuck I was close to doing it myself... I wanted to know you again Franks... Fuck I'm here too. you thought I had everything but I just fucking looked like I did. I'm fucking here too Franky! And Bridget is aching for you... she looks at me like I should be something so much more than I can be, and Boomer and Kim... and who am I here? hey!? no one... a fuckin ghost of you. So fuck off okay?! fuck off."

I heard her swallow hard and then she fell silent. I didn't really know what to say. I picked at my leg tattoo wondering if I could rip the Inmate number wide open... I needed to feel something, but I knew Gidge would be by soon and I hated the thought of her finding me here, especially bloody... but Stella stopped talking and I felt awful... So I started picking at it anyways.

Hours passed and Stella and I were eerily quiet. I heard her humming softly and occasionally I'd hear her sniffle or clear her throat but we didn't speak. She was mad at me and likely just as sore and tired as I was... by the sounds of it she'd put up nearly as big of a fight as I did being put in here. I wondered if the guards had figured it out yet, seeing us together, some conspiracy theories had to be circulating and the thought fuckin sickened me. I picked at my bloddy thigh tracing the blood around the windowsill near my scraped in initials. How the fuck am I back here... Gidge I'm sorry-oh fuck I'm sorry. I held my head in my hands and lay my head in the windowsill desperately wishing I was at home in her arms. I worried about Tess too and how she must be feeling knowing her sisters she'd just gotten to know were both behind bars... If only she knew how badly I wished I could go back.

"Franky... Franky are you okay?" I sniffled hard wiping my mouth of the drool that had accumulated there. I tried to answer her but I couldn't stop the tears long enough to tell her I was sorry and that we'd both be ok, but she spoke instead.

"Franky I'm sorry, but listen... Smiles is gonna get Gidge in here to see me she promised she would and I know she'll go to you first the moment she realizes..." She spoke slowly and calculated and I could tell she was working hard not to reduce herself to tears too.

"St-Stell..." I stammered "Fuck, I'm sorry I'm a fuckin mess..."

"Me too ..." She trailed off. I could feel the lump in her throat as it rose up from my own chest. I hadn't felt so united with her in 19 years...

"I'm sorry... I know you're trying to help... and I'm sorry you're here, sorry you have to live this fucking life too... I fucked up, really bad this time and I'm pretty certain they'll have me behind these bars for life if they can swing it... so please, please promise me when you get out you'll look after Gidge for me... "

"But Franky I..."

"Stellar please... I need to know someone will be there."

She started sobbing and I could picture her nodding her head. "Come over to the grate." I did as she asked and heard her breathe out hard against it. "Its good to hear you voice sis..."

I choked back a nervous fit of laughter and picked at my upper lip. "You too Stell, you have no idea... Fuck I'm so sorry."

I sat by that grate for hours just listening to her breathe. I could tell she'd fallen asleep and I wished I could join her in that. She sounded serene but I was terrified to close my eyes... I'm not a good person! I'm whoever i need to be...oh fuck... Awful thoughts somersaulted in my mind. i shook my head hard enough to make me dizzy and when I pictured Meg's blood on my hands I was able to dismiss it but the flowing blood pooling on my hands from picking at my leg was becoming so much i thought of mum and I heaved at the thought. I was so distraught I didn't even bother to get up. I tucked my head forward and spewed in my lap. Blood, sweat, vomit and piss mixed together in my lap and I swore I felt more dead inside than I ever thought possible... and then I saw her eyes filled with hurt looking through the window in the door as though she was scared to open it.

I heard Stella gasp but she kept quiet. She had obviously noticed our visitor too. The door unlatched loudly and Bridget walked in. I started sobbing but I couldn't look at her. She'd seen me through a lot of shit but I reeked and couldn't even imagine what I must look like. I heard Stella squeak lightly and start to cry softly and they were more than I could take.

"Fucking hell Franky!" Bridget nearly screamed at me. "Ms. Miles I need you to go let medical know that we're going to need a bed open... Fuck Franky what have you done!?"She dropped herself to the floor throwing all professional boundaries out the window and held her hand on the cuts on my leg with a strong amount of pressure. I put my head on her shoulder and cried myself into a messy fit. She sobbed with me patting my matted hair. "Gidge I'm so sorry, I couldn't do it anymore! fuck I'm so sorry." She wiped my eyes and toyed with my sweaty hair as we waited for Ms. Smiles to come back. "Shh Baby I know..." I sat up and looked at her touching her cheek. "You need to go check on Stella... She's here too and she needs you... Don't fuck this up because of me Gidge... You're good at what you do." She nodded and got up moving toward the door. I'd never seen her look so hurt, but she knew I was right and she did as I asked...