Here's a long chapter for you all filled with lemony goodness. I hope you enjoy!
Christi's POV:
My eyes opened, the bedroom was still bright. I looked over at the alarm clock, 12:45pm. Jacob was still fast asleep, his arms tightly wrapped around my body. I wiggled my way up towards his face and gave him a soft kiss on his pouty lips. Jacob stirred and sighed.
"Wake up sleepy." I whispered and kissed him again.
"Mmm… didn't get enough of me?" He smiled pulling me closer to his body. His eyes were still closed.
"We've spent half the day in bed already." I pointed out.
"What's wrong with that?" He leaned in and kissed me tenderly. "I like having you in my bed." He smiled. "Maybe my plan was to abduct you and make love to you all day long." His hands swept across my back, down my curves and over my thighs.
I shivered involuntarily but I felt completely spent.
"I can't anymore." I said in a small voice with a heavy regretful sigh.
"S'ok angel, don't worry beautiful. Actually I'm glad I wore you out." He winked. "Means I'm doing my job right."
"You are doing an amazing job. That's why I love you so much." I kissed him until we were both breathless.
I felt him rise against my leg. Was that even possible? He couldn't be turned on again?
"Evidently, you didn't get enough. Hmmm…" I raised an eyebrow.
"Well what do you expect when you kiss me like that?" He said sheepishly, I could see his cheeks turn pink.
"I just can't' anymore right now Jacob. I'm sorry." I caressed his face with both of my hands.
"I know honey. S'ok I'll just go take a cold shower." His mouth twisted in a half smile.
"I don't think so." I watched his eyes narrow at my words. "Just because you can't do anything to me doesn't mean I can't take care of you" I said against his lips.
I pushed my lips against his and reached down and took him in my hand. I loved hearing his muffled moans and tasting his deep breathy sighs in my mouth as our tongues danced around each others.
"Does that feel good?" I asked in between kisses.
"Incredible." He hissed and crushed his lips back onto mine.
I kept my pace slow, letting him enjoy himself. His body was shivering slightly at my touch.
"Do you wish you were inside of me?" I whispered.
He moaned out in response. I smiled triumphantly, he wasn't the only one allowed to talk dirty around here.
"Nice tight wet pussy wrapped around this big hard cock." I felt him twitch in my hand, his body started to tremble.
"Such a naughty girl." He hissed, his head fell back onto his pillow with a deep moan.
"You love it. I know you do Jacob." I leaned into his ear and licked it.
"God Christi, you know I do." His hips lifted off of the bed into my hand quickening the pace.
"Slow Jacob, I want to make you feel good." I cooed in his ear.
"You're fucking amazing." He said breathlessly. "I want to feel your pussy on my cock." He moaned out. "I love feeling your come on me."
I shivered involuntarily. How did the tables get turned? I was supposed to be talking dirty to him, not the other way around. He reached over and quickly found my entrance with his fingers. I gasped as I felt him insert a finger into me, my body instantly responding to his touch and pooling with wetness. We both moaned as our hands worked on each other. He rolled over on top of me and kissed me urgently.
"I need you." He moaned against my lips.
I guided his shaft into my center – I felt the need for him burning inside of me. He was gentle, almost hesitant as he entered me slowly. He increased his tempo little by little. Try as hard as I might have, I was simply too worn out, it felt amazing, but I could not bring myself over the edge, I was completely spent. Jacob groaned being unable to hold back anymore.
"It's ok, feel good for me Jake. Come." I encouraged him with bated breath.
He let out a deep sigh and released. He lay there on top of me panting heavily, both of our bodies were covered in sweat. He kissed my neck and then down to my chest, he took his time stimulating each one of my sensitive nipples. I knew he was trying to give me my release.
"Jake – it's ok honey." I whispered.
"Shh – let me do this for you. Please." He kissed his way down to my center. "Let me try to make you come. I want you to feel good."
His lips found my sensitive clit suckling and flicking it. He slid two fingers inside of me tapping them up against my g-spot. My body was trembling. I moaned out.
"Good girl, feel good for me." He whispered and went back to licking and sucking on my clit.
I closed my eyes and let myself enjoy all the waves of pleasure coursing through my body. It felt like it took me for ever, but Jacob was finally able to bring me over the edge.
"Sorry, I couldn't stand the thought of leaving you unsatisfied." He kissed me.
"Thank you." I said breathlessly.
We lay in bed for a while enjoying soft caresses and kisses.
"What time do you have to go to work?" Jacob asked with a heavy sigh.
"At six." I glanced over at the clock. It was already 2:20pm. I sighed.
"Are you hungry?" He smiled instantly brightening my mood.
"Maybe a little."
"C'mon then lets get dressed." He kissed my lips and jumped out of bed chipperly.
I stood up, my whole body was stiff. My muscles and joints were definitely feeling the aftermath of our sexual marathon. I grimaced as I stretched, feeling my joints pop. My back and legs were so stiff and sore.
"Are you ok honey?" Jacob was at my side instantly, rubbing his hands on my back soothingly.
"Just a little – sore and stiff." I looked at him apologetically.
I didn't want him to feel bad, I mean, I totally enjoyed myself, it's just that he's just so huge, in more ways than just his height. I guess my body just hasn't adjusted to him yet. I smiled sheepishly.
"I'm sorry." His head dropped. "I was too rough with you. I should have known better."
"Jacob, come on, I'm not complaining." I bent my head and looked up at his face.
"Hello up there." I sang out. "I really enjoyed myself." I smiled shyly.
Jacob looked at me and his face instantly lit up. He swooped down and pulled me up into his arms.
"Well, as long as you enjoyed what we did." He smiled. "But I'm going to give you a break now."
My bottom lip jotted out in a pout. He quickly captured it between his lips and kissed me.
"No pouting, you need a break. You're no good to me if you can't walk." He laughed out loud.
I raised an eyebrow. "Are you even capable of keeping your hands off of me Jacob?" I teased.
"Well, I didn't say this was gonna be easy." He touched his nose to mine. "But we'll give it a try."
He tickled my face wit his nose and spun me around making me giggle.
"What you need is a nice hot shower. That'll help your muscles relax." He walked to the bathroom.
He put the toilet seat cover down and sat me down. He turned on the water in the shower, within a few minutes the bathroom started to steam up.
"Too hot?" He asked, brining the showerhead closer to the edge of the tub.
I tested the waster quickly with my hand and shook my head no. He picked me up into his arms again and stepped into the tub pulling the shower curtain closed behind us. He set me down in front of him running the hot water over my shoulders and back. I moaned out as I felt the heat working its magic on my sore muscles.
Jacob placed the showerhead back on its stand, making sure the water was directly on my neck and shoulders. He took the bar of soap and lathered up his hands bringing them towards my back massaging and kneading my entire back. He worked over my body, kneading and massaging my aching muscles. When he was done, he washed me thoroughly before quickly taking care of himself. We got out of the shower and he toweled me off, carried me into his bedroom and helped me get dressed. Every now and then stealing a kiss.
I felt completely relaxed, even though my body was still pretty achy, but I wasn't going to say anything. Some times in life you just have to suck it up. Especially so, when you're boyfriend is a worrywart.
"Better?" He said just as he had finished brushing my hair.
"Oh yeah. Thanks, you always know exactly how to make me feel better." I leaned up and kissed him.
"You're welcome honey." He smiled.
I stood up, my body protested with several aches and pains. Ugh! How was I going to be able to work like this? That wasn't going to happen. Ok, suck it up or not, I was going to have to tell him.
"You'll probably feel sore for a day or so." He looked at me with saddened eyes." Sorry about that. Are you gonna be able to work like that?"
Saved by his intuitiveness once again.
"Uh – yeah. I was just thinking the same thing." Chagrin. "Hey, where's my phone?" I looked around the room a little perplexed.
Jacob ran out of the room and came back quickly with my phone in hand. I dialed the restaurant and told them to make due without me tonight and tomorrow, just incase.
"Well, that's that." I said snapping my phone shut.
"Will you stay and let me take care of you?" Jacob smiled softly and wrapped his arms around me.
"Take care of me? I'm not sick Jake." I chuckled. "I'm sure that being sore due to rough sex with my boyfriend hardly constitutes needing care." I looked into his hopeful eyes. "But, knowing you" I added, "you probably won't take no for an answer." I smiled.
"Nope." He popped his 'p'. "You're stuck. You're my prisoner and I'm going to spoil you." He tightened his arms around me, making escape impossible.
"I might get used to this – watch it now." I joked.
"I hope so." He leaned in for a kiss. "So – what do you feel like eating?"
"Want me to make you something?" I loved cooking for him.
He rolled his eyes. "Now, how is that letting me take care of you?" He shook his head in disappointment.
"What?" I whined. "I enjoy cooking for the man I love." I pouted.
His frown turned upside down in the most beautiful smile.
"You're still not going to do any work. So forget it." He gave me a quick peck. "We're going out."
I let him win, this time. We went out for some Thai food. Jacob had never eaten Thai before and I knew he would love it. Well at least I hoped he would. I was bound and determined to open his eyes to different worldly cuisines. It would be a shame to deprive someone who loved to eat so much of some of the most delicious food the world had to offer.
"This is so good." Jacob moaned taking a huge forkful of his Pad Thai. "I love spicy food." He said with his mouth full. He sucked air in through his teeth and took a big swig of his Thai tea. "Mmm and this tea is yummy." He winked at me.
I don't think I'll ever get tired of watching Jacob eat. He does it with so much enjoyment, it's really great. We headed back to Jacob's house after we were done eating.
"Oh crap." Jacob complained.
"What?"
"I promised Sam I'd help him out this evening. Crap!" He grumbled.
"It's ok Jake. Want to take me home?" I didn't want to impose.
"No, stay! Let me call him and see if one of the other guys – no – never mind, he needs me – but I don't' want you to leave. It's better if you stay here." He rambled nervously.
"Oh – kay." I shot him a weird look. He was acting a bit strange, wonder what that's all about?
He leaned in and captured my lips within his. All was forgotten.
"Do you mind staying?" He asked sweetly.
"Not at all." I smiled.
"Well, I don't have to leave for a few more hours, wanna watch a movie? I'll even let you pick." He winked.
I looked through the cabinet in the living room. There were mostly action movies and a few comedies. Buried all the way in the back of the bottom shelf I found a few VHS tapes.
"What are these?" I asked pulling two out.
"Oh wow. I haven't seen those in a while." Jacob took the videos from me and examined them. "They're old family videos." He said nostalgically.
"Do you mind?" I asked shyly, I was curious to watch them now.
"What?" He looked at me confused. "You – you want to watch them?"
"Well, yeah. I want to see what an adorable child you were."
He practically skipped over to the VCR. He pulled the black tape out of its dusty cover and popped it into the player. We curled up on the couch and he pressed play on the remote.
A gangly kid with beautiful russet skin and long black hair was running on the beach.
"Dad, watch me!" He squealed out doing a cartwheel on the sand.
"Very good Jacob." A deep voice said from behind the camera lens.
Jacob's face lit up the screen with a huge grin. I looked up and saw Jacob smiling the exact same way. I couldn't help giggling.
"What?" He asked suspiciously.
"You were an adorable child. So cute." I smiled. "Hmm… wonder what happened?" I teased him.
"Hey, you're missin' the best part." He motioned towards the TV.
Child Jacob was laughing and jumping around the beach, turning cartwheels in the sand. His father chuckled behind the camera causing the lens to shake and unfocus every now and then.
"You know I'm still adorable." Jacob whispered in my ear, kissing my cheek. "And cute." He added.
"And sexy." I smiled. "But don't let that inflate your oversized ego." I shook with silent laughter.
"I'll try." He stroked my hair softly.
The rest of the video was similar to the first part, little Jacob running around the beach, laughing and being a care free child.
"Hey dad, let me film!" He begged. "Please dad?"
"Ok son, but be careful." Jacob's dad responded.
The video shook and went out of focus as the camera was exchanged from father to son.
"Cool." Jacob exclaimed behind the lens. "Hey dad – say cheese!"
The lens was spun around to face his father. I gasped with the realization that the man on the video was the same exact man that had been in my dream the night before. I felt my whole body tense.
"What's wrong honey?" Jacob asked.
What's going on here? First Jacob and his friends and now his father? This is starting to get a little freaky. I've never dreamt of people and then met them before, am I psychic and I just never knew about it? Or just crazy? I couldn't speak, I was still in a silent state of shock, I stared at the TV wide eyed examining the man's face, making absolutely sure that I wasn't going crazy.
"Christi?" Jacob's voice sounded so far away from me. "Honey?" I felt him shake me lightly.
There was no way I was going to tell him, I'd sound like a mad woman – he'd think I was insane if I said anything to him. I shook my head in an attempt to refocus my thoughts.
"Huh?" I said still a little dazed.
"Are you alright?" He examined my face.
"Yeah – sorry – just a little dazed." It wasn't a lie, but he didn't need to know the reason why.
"Are you tired? Do you want to rest?" He kissed my forehead.
Sleep was the last thing on my mind. I don't know if I'd ever be able to go back to sleep again. I really was on the verge of a panic attack. Jacob's soft touch and kisses brought me back form my momentary insanity. I just wanted to forget everything. I needed a major distraction – something to occupy my thoughts with something else – fast.
I turned my head up towards him and kissed him a little too urgently. I crawled up onto his lap, straddling him. I didn't care that my body ached or that I was losing my mind, all I needed was to be close to him. I reached up and knotted my fingers into his hair, pulling him closer to me – arching my body against his.
"Make love to me. I need you to Jacob, please." I begged against his lips.
He groaned. "I don't want to hurt you Christi."
"You wont, we'll take it easy, I trust you. Just please." Please make me forget about all the craziness. Please Jacob, don't question my motives, just please help me forget. "Please?" I begged him again.
"You know, I can't say no to you." He whispered trailing kisses down my neck.
That's what I was counting on. I left myself melt into his kisses and touch. Before long my whole body was tingling – all else forgotten. He picked me up and took me into his bedroom laying me on the bed. Both of our clothes were slowly discarded until we were both naked against each other.
"Tell me if I'm too rough with you." He whispered against my lips.
He lay back on the bed pulling my body on top of his and kissed me deeply as he entered me slowly. I gasped. His hands were kneading my back as his hips kept a slow delicious rhythm. I moaned and sighed into his mouth with every gentle stroke. His body was trembling beneath me. I could feel my release building slowly.
"Faster Jacob." I kissed him with more urgency. "I need to come, please?"
He complied hesitantly increasing his pace until I released. He stayed inside of me grinding gently, letting me come down slowly and then pulled out without finishing himself.
"What about you?" I wasn't going to let him stay unsatisfied.
"Shh – I don't want to hurt you."
I felt his hand reach down in between my legs. He grabbed the length of his shaft and started to stroke himself against my center. He leaned up and kissed me urgently. I could feel his hand go faster as he moaned into my mouth. I moved my hips up and down, rubbing my wet lips against his swollen head, he moaned louder into my mouth. He grunted and I felt his release spill against me.
"Sorry." I mumbled against his lips.
"Don't be." He stroked the entire length of my body with both of his hands. "I told you I was going to take care of you honey."
"You're the best Jake." I smiled.
"Are you satisfied? Or – can I do anything else to make you feel good?" He wiggled his eyebrows and darted his tongue in and out of his mouth a few times. He bit down on his bottom lip waiting for my response.
"Quit tempting me with your sexy mouth." I felt his fingers stroke my folds softly, making me tingle. "You are so bad Jacob Black." I sighed moving my hips into his fingers.
"Do you want me to stop?" A devilish smile was on his lips.
His smile quickly melted into an intense gaze. He licked his lips sensually, his finger found my clit stroking and grinding against it slowly.
"Don't you – dare – stop." I said breathlessly.
"Does that feel good?" He said hoarsely.
"You know it does." I moaned.
He rolled me onto the bed and slid his body down mine with a huge grin. He slung my legs over his broad shoulders and started to lick me softly. His tongue found my swollen clit, circling round and round. My hips lifted and ground against him slowly, matching his rhythm. I hissed and moaned out in pleasure every time he dove in and then pulled back. I could feel his hesitation, but I wasn't sure why?
"Why are you holding back Jake?" I sighed.
"I can't lose control." He said breathlessly.
It almost felt like he was trying to convince himself more than me. I'd have to ask him about that later, I felt too damn good to analyze things at this moment. My body was trembling on the verge of release. His thumb pressed down on my clit grinding against it.
"Come in my mouth." I heard him gasp as he slid his tongue inside of me.
My entire body was rocked with my release. Jacob moaned and lapped up all of me. He released me with a heavy sigh and kissed his way up my body. He stopped as he reached my neck, his lips and tongue worshiping every inch. He licked up the center of my neck, over my chin and then softly around my lips requesting access. I parted my lips and sucked his tongue into my mouth tasting my own essence on it.
He grabbed a hold of my waist and rolled over pulling me on top of his body. We kissed deeply and sensually for what felt like hours, sighing softly into each other's mouths.
"I'll never get tired of kissing you." I looked down at him dreamily.
"I'm gonna remember that." He winked. His fingertips brushed over my cheeks and mouth softly. "I love your mouth." He whispered.
He leaned forward and captured my lips in between his again.
"Honey." He whispered. "I have to leave in a few hours. I want to go to the store and get a few things first. Do you want to stay? Or come with me?"
"Mmm…" I groaned. "Do we have to get out of bed already?" I whined. "Can't we just stay and kiss some more? – Mmm – kissing is nice." I pressed my lips against his, finding no objection on his part.
Then guilt hit me, I couldn't keep Jacob form his food, that is just wrong. I giggled against his lips.
"What's so funny?" He bit down on my bottom lips playfully.
"I can't keep you away from your food." I smiled.
"You are more important than food to me, you know." He stated.
"I know, but that's just wrong of me Jake."
"Come on then let's go silly girl." He sat up slowly taking me with him.
We got dressed, kissed some more and then went to the store. I swear I felt like a teenager all over again. Jacob and I made out in the car – before leaving to the store – in the parking lot of the store, in the cereal isle – which earned us more than one throat clearing, then again in the parking lot of the store, followed by a very hot and heavy make out session on the couch when we got back to his house.
I was finally able to pry myself away from his sexy lips so that I could help put the groceries away while he showered. I hunted and pecked around the kitchen until I figured out where everything went. I felt two large hands around my waist. Just like this morning, Jacob spun me around and lifted me up onto the kitchen counter.
He only had a towel wrapped around his waist. His hair was wet and slicked back messily, his beautiful russet skin was still glistening with moisture. I followed a drop of water which trickled down the middle of his chest, over his stomach just missing his belly button and then disappeared once it reached his low slung towel.
I looked back up at his face and was greeted with the most beautiful warm smile. He stepped in between my thighs and pressed himself up against my body, grabbing my hips to pull me closer.
"How are you feeling?" His voice deep and husky, his eyes darkened with lust.
"Better." I lied. I was still a little stiff and sore, but I was determined not to let that ruin the mood.
"Liar." He smiled and kissed me chastely.
I ran my hands over his shoulders enjoying the heat coming off of his freshly showered body. I traced down his chest and stomach and grabbed a hold of his towel. With a quick tug it fell to the ground. I bit my bottom lip enticing him as my hands slid around his waist and then down towards his beautiful firm ass.
"Now this is what I call, buns of steel." I smacked each cheek and playfully squeezed them.
I felt him harden against me.
"See what you did now – naughty girl." He had a wicked smile on his lips. "What am I going to do with you?"
"Mmm, ravage my body?" I flashed a sexy smile.
His fingers quickly moved to unbutton my jeans. I wrapped my arms around his neck steadying myself as he wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me off of the counter. His free hand quickly pulled off my jeans and panties, I kicked them off once they slid past my knees. My legs wrapped around his hips as he lowered me back down onto the counter top. He hurriedly took off my shirt and bra leaving me naked. I could feel his throbbing hardness against my center.
Our eyes locked. I'd see that same look in his eyes before. – Last night on the way home. – I gasped with the memory. His darkened eyes bore into me, I knew what he wanted and I knew I wanted it too – but he stood there silently staring at me, his body was trembling lightly. Both of our breath labored with our excitement. I felt desire pooling in my core. Jacob's nostrils flared as he took in a deep breath – he shook his head and closed his eyes.
"Jacob?" I started to wonder if he was ok.
His eyes snapped open. "I need you." His voice sounded tortured.
"Don't worry – I'm fine, I want you just as bad." I assured him.
I know he was hesitant because he didn't want to hurt me. His eyes narrowed and his jaw locked.
"What do you want?" He growled.
"I want you to quit treating me like a breakable doll." I said sternly. "I'm not that fragile you – " He suddenly plunged into me making me scream out his name.
He grabbed my hips firmly in his hands as he drove into me hard and fast. My whole body was on fire. I screamed out his name in between high pitched yelps of pleasure, our bodies slapping together loudly. Jacob drove into me again and again grunting loudly. My body tensed and shook as I neared my release.
"Oh, fuck!" I yelped.
I clamped down on him and released in a powerful orgasm. I cried out as the waves of pleasure hit me. Jacob's pace increased inside of me, pounding fast and hard within me. He threw his head back and with a loud grunt, released, throwing me over the edge again.
His head fell forward onto my shoulder, we were both completely breathless and dripping with sweat. Our bodies remained connected.
"Wasn't that better than holding back?" I panted.
He looked up at me, his eyes full of concern.
"Is that what you wanted?" He looked horrified, my poor Jacob, so sweet and so concerned.
"Did I stop you?" I raised an eyebrow.
"No – but." He stuttered.
"No buts, I love how you make me feel." I sighed.
"I do too." He smiled and kissed me.
His fingertips ran up and down my bare back making my skin tingle.
How do you feel?" He whispered.
"I'm fine Jacob." I was more than fine, I was still semi-turned on, to tell the truth. That was really hot and felt so good. "My body just needs to adjust to yours. No worries, it's not a big deal, really..." I kissed him.
His hands grabbed my ass cheeks and lifted me off of the counter. He carried me over to his room and laid me down onto the bed. We lay there caressing one and other and kissing softly.
There was a loud knock at the front door. I jumped in Jacob's arms.
"Damn it!" He cursed. "Coming!" He called out.
He jumped out of bed and grabbed a pair of short. He quickly slipped them on and went to answer the door. I heard hushed voices but couldn't tell what was being said. Oh well, it's rude to eves drop. I got up and found my blue night dress. I slid it on and looked around for something to do. I walked over to the stereo and popped open the CD compartment. There was a CD of a band I had never heard of in there. Jacob seemed to have pretty good taste in music, so I decided to close the top and push play.
Deep bass started pulsing through the speakers. I was impressed with the high quality sound emanating from the stereo. This was the kind of music that sent the blood coursing through my veins with an electric shock. I lay back on the bed and closed my eyes enjoying the music. My whole skin was crawling with goose bumps. I know that probably sounds really weird, but music – good music – does that to me, it's like a natural high.
I felt two large hands touching my legs softly. I kept my eyes closed and smiled. My breath hitched in the back of my throat as they reached the inside of my thighs. The combination of the soft caresses and music were making me tingle from head to toe.
"Keep your eyes closed." Jacob said hoarsely.
His fingers slid inside of me without warning, I gasped at his touch. I felt the bed shift with his weight. He slid his free hand over my shoulders sliding my dress straps down, he pulled the material away exposing my hardened breasts. His lips captured one hard nipple sucking and licking it gently, making me ache with pleasure. Jacob's large fingers were busy strumming up against both of my sensitive pleasure spots. I arched my back and hips off of the bed to meet his hand and mouth. My body trembled and then released.
"Mmm – good girl." His lips found mine, his tongue pressing up against mine firmly deepening our kiss. "I love making you come." He smiled.
"I can tell." I smiled sleepily.
"Get some rest angel. I'm going to take a shower."
He attempted to leave but I pulled him back into bed with me.
"Don't leave me." I protested. "Hold me."
His strong arms wrapped around me and pulled me into his body. I rested my head against his chest and closed my eyes. I felt really relaxed and almost drifted off, but then my eyes snapped open and I was instantly horrified to go to sleep. I mean, my dreams hadn't been nightmares by any means, but I was so scared of what was going on. I didn't understand why all of the sudden my dreams were coming true.
"What's wrong Christi?" Jacob asked softly.
"I can't sleep." I lied.
"I thought I wore you out pretty good there." I felt his chest rise and fall with silent laughter.
"You did." I said shortly. "I just can't."
I avoided eye contact with him at all costs, I didn't want him to know he was in bed with a crazy woman. What is wrong with me? I feel like a paranoid schizophrenic. Something was seriously wrong with me.
"Something's wrong Christi, I can tell." His voice was calm and collected. "You've been acting a little weird, first on the couch and now here. Won't you confide in me and tell me what's going on?"
Could I confide in him? What if he thinks I'm completely insane and has me committed? What if he never speaks with me again in fear of my mental instability? Ok shut up Christi, now you are starting to sound like a schizophrenic. Ugh!
"I can't – I – " I was at a loss for words.
"Is it a girl thing?" He tried to guess.
I could feel him trying to put me at ease with his tone.
"You know, I have two sisters, so you can't shock me with any feminine stuff." He rubbed by back with his palm.
"It's – it's not a girl thing." No it's an 'I'm crazy thing.' By the way Jacob you are dating a mental case.
I felt his lips press onto my forehead softly.
"Then what is it?" He sighed against my skin.
His lips brushed against my skin again and again softly. I buried my face into his chest.
"I'm crazy." My voice was muffled in his chest.
"What?" He chuckled. His strong hands hooked underneath my arms and pulled me up towards him. "What's this crazy talk?" He asked me suspiciously.
His hand grabbed my chin, pulling my face up towards him and forced me to look at him.
"I am." I said in a small voice.
"Why in the world would you think that Christi?" He looked at me with concern now.
Oh God, how can I tell him without sounding like I'm insane, wait – I just told him I'm crazy – he already thinks I'm insane. Ugh! My body was trembling fearfully. I couldn't hold back any more I just cracked.
"I had a dream about you before I met you. I saw you and your friends and knew all your names, only you had long hair, but then I met you and you had short hair. And in my dream you bit me, you bit me on my neck and now I have this damn mark on my neck that I can't explain. And I know I sound crazy, and I'm sorry but that's just the way it is."
I saw him open his mouth to say something but I kept rambling on.
"And then last night I had a dream of an old man that came to me and confused me and I didn't know who he was, he kept talking about wolves and kept saying to take care of "him", I assume he meant you, so I agreed. Then we watched that video and there was the man from my dream. Your dad. I dreamt of you, your friends and your dad before I ever saw any of your faces. I dreamt of you and now you can think I'm crazy."
My head fell back down into his chest. I was at the verge of tears. My mind was completely melting down, I just told my boyfriend that I dreamt of him, his father and his friends before I met him. If he were telling me this shit I would run a million miles an hour to get the hell away from him. Why wasn't he saying anything?
"You dreamt of my dad?" He said, his voice incredulous.
"Yes." I squeaked against his chest. "Billy." I cringed at the sound of his name, I don't know why, but I did.
I felt him tense underneath me. I made up my mind to not live in regret of what I had just told him, if he accepted me – as mental as I might be – that would be great, but if he didn't I would just count my loses and move on. I got very sad by the last thought, my eyes started to well up in spite of my trying to be strong and keep a straight face. I was failing miserably at keeping my composure.
"Honey?" Jacob finally broke the silence. "Are you ok?" He pulled my face up towards him and quickly brushed my tears away. "Why are you crying?" He kissed my face softly. "Don't cry Christi."
"You don't think I'm crazy?" I squeaked out. "I was scared you wouldn't want a crazy woman." I broke down.
"No – you're not crazy Christi. God, please don't think I'm going anywhere, I love you. I'm yours." He kissed my tears as they fell down my cheeks.
"What's wrong with me?" I sniffled. My voice was still cracking.
"Nothing is wrong with you honey." He said soothingly. "But we need to talk."