Absolute Shocker!
By JamesRoxMySox
Disclaimer: I own nothing recognisable from the Harry Potter books or movies that belongs to J.K.Rowling and Warner Brothers studios
Friday 14th January – Hospital Wing
Humpf!
Bloody boys!
Stupid, exceedingly dim creatures that we rely upon for the continuation of our race… all I can say is that based on my observations the future generations are doomed
Now I like Charlie, really I do but that boy can't perform charms to save himself
That is the exact reason why I happen to be in the hospital wing, because no matter how much tutoring I give him he still can't get the hang of charms
To be more precise he can't get the wand movements right
After that magnificent explosion that sent James flying into a particularly hard wall, Charlie can storming down the stairs in search of me
I was unfortunately only halfway to the stairs and freedom when Charlie spotted me
"Oh no you don't Lily! You get back here"
Of course I did the sensible thing and ran for the stairs
One problem: he happens to be faster than me
He some how got between me and the stairs leading to the girls' dorms
Uh oh
Very big 'Uh oh'
"You told"
He sounded very annoyed and not at all as though he was going to take this with grace
Just between you and me that glint in his eyes reminded me of a serial killer I had seen on a television special over the summer, it was rather unnerving….
Okay, okay, I admit I was rather afraid of what he might actually do
He went all red and purple and white splotches started appearing on his face making it look like homemade blackberry ice cream and it was all scrunched up in suppressed anger
Plus there was the fact that he was holding his wand like a maniac and it was pointing straight at my chest after all, I would be doubting my own sanity if I hadn't been slightly concerned
"You promised you wouldn't say anything"
Oh dear, he sounds rather hurt
Okay time for damage control
"Well, you see I didn't actually say anything as such, I just thought since you didn't want to ask James for advice I could do it on your behalf"
Charlie stared at me like I'm mad… he does that a lot actually, but this time he just sort of blinked at me and stared disbelievingly
Well come on what was I supposed to do, he was driving up the wall asking me all those silly questions that I can't for the life of me answer
"I bet that went down well"
Have I ever expressed my passionate hate for sarcastic smart arses?
Well I am now
"Yeah it went down a treat, I was just trying to help, geez"
Oh dear he's gone all red and splotchy again
"What do you mean 'just trying to help'! You were meddling!"
Okay so he has a point with the meddling thing, but I was doing it in his best interest
"Hey! I was putting myself on the line to help you, you could be a little more grateful!"
That seems to have been the last straw, he promptly tried to blast me across the room
Key word is tried
…unsuccessfully, may I add
Instead of being hurled against a wall like James he managed to turn my hair into snakes, bright orange snakes…
Talk about embarrassing
I just stared at him
"What the hell was that! How many times do I have to tell you about wrist mov – AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Halfway through my lecture one of those horrid little animals that I previously called my hair, copped me in the eye with its tail
Can you say ouchies?
Well I say BLOODY HELL!
I then stumbled around in agony, being poked in the eye by a rattle tail really hurts, and I only managed stopped when I collided with an innocent footstool… while I was going backwards
CRACK!
That would be one of my many leg bones breaking as I awkwardly landed
Just my luck
Charlie was still yelling even though I was lying semi unconscious on the ground, passed out with pain. It took him a good couple of minuted to realise that I wasn't about to get back up… but I think it was the fact that I wasn't yelling back that really got his attention
All of a sudden there was a mop of blonde hair and an anxious face staring down at me and high pitched noises started coming from it
I have no idea what he was saying but I do believe he was panicking and from what I can gather his high frequency babble was enough to rouse James from his wall induced stupor and between the two of them they were able to get me up here
Madame Wilks was raving about it this morning, how boys really need to learn to control their wands
… she was also muttering about 'shock' again and that would be why I am, yet again, confined to a hospital bed
Last night I'm pretty sure I passed out right after I choked down those god awful potions Wilks always insists on giving me. This morning I woke up in time for class but Madame Wilks is insisting I stay at least until lunch, if she had her way I'd be stuck in here till at least Sunday morning.
Charlie came to visit me this morning and apologise over and over and over again, he also presented me with a bunch of honking daffodils, he said they always cheer him up so he thought I might like them
Aaaawwww! Isn't he sweet? I felt so bad I tried to apologise for the whole talking to James thing but he just waved me off
I then asked him if he could please retrieve this diary from the common room for me before classes start.
I would hate for this to fall in the wrong hands, say the hands of Rosemary MacDonald
Ugh!
That would be an absolute nightmare, imagine all the dirt she could get on me! Like the infatuation with Daniel or our night time wanderings or my slightly less than legal actions which I would prefer remained confined to this diary and my friends, all of it neatly laid out in chronological order and in painful detail
What? I never said I have an interesting life, this diary in itself shows I have far to much time on my hands, what with all the documenting I do. Honestly most people who picked this up would probably toss it away after the first couple of lines in favour of last February's issue of Twinkle Toes – the magazine with all you need to know about the latest toenail care
Oh joy a whole day in the hospital wing, I may just lose my control in all the excitement and end up with wet knickers
Bollocks!
I've just remembered, Flitwick was suppose to show use this really cool little charm during Charms today and I have to miss it because of Madame Wilks and her 'shock' theories
Hey, there's Rosie! What's she doing here, it's the middle of the morning for chocolate's sake, I think I may have to go investigate, I can try to sneak out while I'm at it, I can still make it to charms if I run…
HUMPHF!
She found me out, I was barely three feet from the door when Wilks caught sight of me and hauled me back to bed, I thought school nurses where supposed to encourage their patients to attend class not restrain them
If I fall behind due to this I will be giving Madame Wilks a piece of my mind, not a large piece admittedly, I need all the working brain cells I can get, but still a substantial amount
But on the other hand I found out what Rosy was up to…
It seems that Charlie isn't the only one who needs a bit of extra charms tutoring; Rosie seems to have been feeling a bit down today and decided cast a bit of a glamour charm on herself
It went wrong… horribly, horribly wrong
All I can say is that you should never trust those beauty tips in Teen Witch, Dana leaves them lying all over the place and some of the tripe they print is absolutely unbelievable
I actually checked up on one of the pimple squeezing spells and you were more likely to set your skin on fire than remove a black head
And Rosie did quite the number on herself, there's boils and pus everywhere, no wonder she came down once everyone was in class I wouldn't want anyone to see me looking like that either
I actually feel kind of sorry for the poor girl, I mean she was just having an off day and all she wanted to do was perk herself up a bit, admittedly it was probably so she could lure in some poor fool and then crush his poor little heart to pieces but still…
Ugh! I'm such a softie, I disgust myself, I make a toasted marshmallow look impenetrable
Alright, yes I caved, but come on she was sitting over there looking all dejected, I couldn't just let her suffer! It's against my nature I tell you!
I just went and offered one of the traditional chocolate frogs I receive every hospital wing trip from my friends to Rosemary and a honking daffodil to go with it
I know, I know, she's horrible and manipulative and self centred and would never do that for me should our roles be reversed but I couldn't help it, she was just sitting there looking all forlorn
Damn her and her baby blue eyes, all big and innocent looking, no wonder so many innocent males get sucked into her little game – I know what she's really like and even I can't resist their power, imagine the poor sods who base things entirely on looks, they have no chance
She was actually surprisingly grateful about the whole thing, took my gestures with grace…
I suppose Rosie's not all that bad after all
Sunday 16th January – Common Room
Heh heh heh
I love Sunday afternoons
Especially when entertainment is provided
What's this entertainment you ask?
Well it seems that I'm not the only one with an over load of curiosity
This afternoon James finally asked Dana about the 'fan club' thing
Everyone else groaned while I grinned like an idiot
Rhi quickly excused herself to go meet Robbie for their walk around the lake… Pft! Walk around the lake, more like an in depth examination of the human mouth
Nessa buried her head in a couple of pillows, while Tri smacked his head against the table a couple of times and Bridget eagerly joined the conversation
Cam had his head in his hands but noticed my cheerful demeanour and gave me a suspicious look
In all honesty I didn't really try to cover up my childish, vindictive joy
Plus my smiling was a bit of a give way of my guilt seeing as I'm usually the first to start complaining and conspiring with Cam as to what we can suffocate the twins with when they start up on this dreaded subject.
"Why do I get the feeling this is all your doing?" Cam asked me with a mock glare
Deny everything – that's the best advice known to man
I acquired an innocent look
"Me? What could I do?"
Cam wasn't fooled in the least
"An awful lot, just what is the question"
I just smiled and turned back to the scene before us
Dana is babbling continuously with Bridget interjecting every now and then with some outburst
James is staring at them a little dumbfounded
Heh heh heh
Take that Potter! Next time you won't be so nosy
Though I really shouldn't be mean, the twins are absolutely shameless about their obsession with the sexy duo and I bet they're just thrilled that they can discuss it with the one of the actual objects of their fixation
Oh dear I do believe they've moved into marathon mode
Tri and Nessa have skedaddled, muttering something about 'quidditch practice'
Hmmm, is that what they're calling it now?
They never could handle the twins' obsessive ramblings
Luckily Cam and I have built up a resistance to their voices and are gradually learning to tune them out
Key word there is gradual, we haven't quite managed it yet
Cam's shooting James sympathetic looks
"Do you think we should save him now?"
I gave him a 'Are you nuts' look
Why would I want to do that? James is getting a well deserved dose of medicine – my style of medicine that will hopefully deter him from purposely ticking me off
I say 'purposely' because he's bound to do something to annoy me – it's like genetically encoded or something…
"And we should do that why?"
Cam rolled his eyes
"Give the man a break, there's only so much one person can handle"
Pft! He can handle it
"Show me a man and I'll give him a break"
Well I mean really, Cam is attempting to take away my Sunday afternoon's entertainment, I am not going to agree to this quietly and passively
Where am I going to find substantial entertainment for the rest of the evening?
Uh oh
Cam just gave me the look
"Ugh! Fine, we'll get him out, what's the plan?"
Cam and I usually scheme up ways of getting ourselves away from the twins, now we have to concoct a way to get an additional third party out of their clutches…
Oh joy
"Well how about I distract the twins by mentioning Nick, while you quickly whisk James off to feed Alfred. Oh and could you slip Stevie a couple of drops of pepper up potion he's been a bit off colour lately"
Well it sounds reasonable…
"Right on the count of three, one, two, three…"
Why do I get the feeling that this will lead to trouble, for me at least?
Wednesday 19th January – The Art of Boring Students to Death, As Perfected By Professor Binns
The morning of notes, exchanging them that is, no one ever mentioned anything to me about taking any down….
Yes our weekly lesson of boredom (aka a History of Magic lesson with Binns) that we effectively combat against by entertaining ourselves with amusing anecdotes, scribbled on scraps of parchment that are passed from table to table
Last time it was something about Sinistra, Bolivian tree frogs and the Cancan…
Why does he have to make everything so boring? I mean really, a bloody goblin revolution, in which many heads literally rolled, should not be this boring – it's against the laws of nature or something – VH
Definitely, the man's been dead far too long – LE
It's hard to imagine him alive, let alone our age
I doubt he can either
You know what we need?
A list
Precisely, a list
The only question is what sort of list
Something involving chocolate…
And it's advantages
I know…
Vanessa Halleway and Lillianna Evans
Present
Why Chocolate Is Better Than… Well, Other Things
1. You can GET chocolate
Very true, it's easy to find unlike other things such as good menHmmm, I dunno about the good men comment, YOU seem to find them pretty easily e.g. the infatuated quidditch captain
I shall ignore that comment and continue as though you never wrote it, NEXT!2. 'If you love me, you'll swallow' has real meaning with chocolate
Now this one I can agree with, remember the dilemma Amy from Ravenclaw was facing last term with the egocentric drip of hers, you'd never have that problem with chocolate
For some reason chocolate just seems to be so much more understanding…
And he was such a tosser, I'm glad she got rid of him
3. Chocolate satisfies even when it goes soft
You know this one depends what you're talking about, because in certain circumstances 'softness' is not at all favoured but other times being soft is an advantage
Are we coming back to the hunky quidditch captain again? NO! Why would you say THAT? Oh it's just that you have definitely 'softened' up to him latelyUgh! I think we'll leave this one right alone…
4. The word 'commitment' doesn't scare off chocolate
…. Unlike certain redhead's I know
Oh who's that?
Ugh! Dear Merlin, why do I have to have such a dimwitted best friend?
You! You, blind flubberworm!
Hey, I resent that! I am nothing like a flubberworm!
Okay, so maybe you don't have any flubberworm tendencies but you are afraid of commitment
I am not!Yes, you are, why else would you completely ignore James' attempts to engage you in a romantic relationship
Ugh! What is it with people and THAT word! I hate THATword!
What word?
The 'e' word
Huh?
Engage – it's a horrible word
That may be so but it's beside the point, you're avoiding the subject
Oh, and just what is the subject?
You and James
What about James and I?
Sweet Merlin, you're annoying
Thankyou, I've been informed of that on numerous occasions
Well the fact of the matter is that you are ignoring James
I am not! I hang out with every now and then, just last Sunday we went and visited Alfred
Well you are ignoring all those little signals he's sending you He's sending me signals? Uh huh, lots of them
Why haven't I noticed?
Because you've been preoccupied with various other issues that have been claiming your attention
Like?Well us, your friends, for start, Charlie and his confusing 4th year love life, your sister's wedding – I noticed she owled you the other day
Don't remind me, she was quizzing me on whether I had finalised the design of my Maid of Honour dress, I mean really as if it matters what I think the old bat is going to swoop in and change everything anyway
True, which brings me to my last point – your mother and her plans to bring you and Remus together, it's sort of been taking up most of your time worrying about it, no wonder poor James feels rejected
'poor James' now is it? Never mind poor Lily with all this on her plate
Yes, he's so very sweet, oh yeah and er, this came for you this morning but you were away in Lily land so I took it and let the poor owl go get it's breakfast which happened to be your bacon coincidently
Lily?
Friday 22nd January – Astronomy Tower
My mother is insane
The woman is truly deranged
The old bat is definitely bonkers and needs a bed reserved for her in St Mungo's
I've been coming up here fairly often lately even though it's absolutely freezing, but happens to be absolutely void of people which is a wonderful attribute at the moment as it means I can scream obscenities and no one hears them, and yes I do believed I have been pencilled in for a bed near my mother's in St Mungo's…
Between Tuna's incessant whining about her wedding and my mother's continual 'encouragement' I'll never make it till summer with out attempting to curse myself at least once
When Nessa handed me that letter in history I almost fainted
The overpowering lavender scent and neat flowing script meant it could only belong to one person – an unhinged bored housewife more commonly referred to as my mother
And you'll never guess what that oh so long letter was about – it had me wanting to pull out my hair in frustration when I was only a quarter of a way through
It was, to use Remus' terminology, an 'encouraging' letter, in which the old bat explicitly told me that I would be dating Remus by the en of the month and that when he asked me to Hogsmeade, because he most certainly would be asking me, that I was to accept
Pft! As if Remus is even going to ask any such thing
The rest of the letter went on to explain that I would be spending the Easter holidays with Remus as our families had decided to go on holiday together
Ugh! I don't think I handle this, I really can't
I was also informed that Remus shall be my date for Petunia's, as if I really care anyway, and then came a long winded explanation of my mother's expectations
I'm guessing that Daddy has no idea about this seeing as he was still entirely off the old bat when I last saw him
The best thing to do would be beat the deranged old bat over the head with my transfiguration book until I knock some sense into her…. Wait I think my book would fall apart first I rather need that one, unless…. I could just use my potions book! It's not like I use it anyway, it has at least an inch of dust covering it – it has a new life shielding from my view the carob chocolate mother sent me when she was on one of her health… thing. Carob chocolate, I mean honestly who eats this stuff? It doesn't taste nearly as good as the proper stuff, if you are going to treat yourself you may as well do it properly.
Anyway what was I talking about?
Oh yes my 'encouraging' letter
I think I'll have to talk it through with Remus and see what we can come up with
Monday 24th January – Common Room
It's my free study period so I thought I'd take this moment to document my continuing troubles with that damn letter
I finally caught up with Remus in the common room the other night, seems he's been getting similarly encouraging letters from his mother
The Marauders were grouped around the fire, planning something no doubt
As good a time as any to get this ruddy thing over with
"Remus"
The whole lot of them looked around and stared at me, geez address one and you're effectively addressing them all
Okay now would be the time for my Gryffindor courage to kick in – if I have any that is
"Er… Remus could I please talk to you for a second… privately"
I had to add the last part as they seemed to expect me to just blurt it all out
The Marauders may know about my little problem but I would rather just discuss it with Remus for the moment. At the moment I'm under way to much pressure to have to deal with their various responses
Remus followed me over to the other side of the common room
Remus had a knowing look on his face
He got things started before I could open my mouth
"This is about the Hogsmeade trip isn't it?"
I looked at him slightly startled, but I should have known that he would be clued up seeing as he's been getting the same sort of letters
"Yes, it's driving me absolutely balmy, my mother basically ordered me to date you"
Deluded old cow
"Yeah, she can be rather forceful"
Remus pulled out a something from his pocket and I caught a giant whiff of lavender…
She wouldn't!
I recognised the neat flowing script immediately
She did!
My mother has written to Remus
Oh lord that woman needs a serious talking to, just what does she think she's playing at?
"Let me guess it informs you that you will ask me to the next Hogsmeade trip and that we are spending the Easter holidays together?"
Remus have me a half smile
"Right in one"
At this point I had to clutch the arms of the chair I was sitting in to stop myself from losing it
… it didn't work
"Ugh! I can't believe her! Who the hell does she think she is? Messing around with my life like this, I hate when people do that"
I looked over at Remus he just looked as though he agreed entirely
"How are we going to… solve this? I mean no offence Remus but I could never date you and I'm pretty sure the feelings are mutual so what in the name of Merlin's wand are we going to do?"
Remus seemed to be thinking something over
"Well it's definite that we will not be dating one another, as to what we're going to do… you can start by taking a few deep breaths, we can deal with this, believe me Lily you're forceful enough to get through to your mother you just need to calm down first"
I hate it when he does that, he's all reasonable and what not
But I did as he said I tried to calm down
"Okay, now let's think, what can you say to her that will convince your mother to give up her ridiculous ideas"
I think of a variety of things to say to her, none of which are appropriate or would convince her to change her ideas
"Hmmm, I'm not really sure how to appeal to her other than t tell her she's a cow"
Remus just smiled
"That might not be the right way to go about it" he paused for a moment "How about you write her a letter expressing her views, I'll do the same with my mum, but we have to show them to each other first "
After that he left me to my letter writing, well he thought I was going to write my letter
Pft! As if I have time! I have to perfect my non verbal incantations for human transfiguration, revise for my potions practical – I may have to actually view the carob chocolate for a while seeing as this next antidote thing accounts for a large percent of our end of year mark, plus there's the essay due for Defence that requires tedious amounts of research in the restricted section
Yeah I'm really going to write my letter when I have all that to do
I watched Remus rejoin the Marauders, I saw their questioning looks and Sirius no doubt was asking what that was about but Remus just shook his head
See! Some people can keep their mouths shut! … wish I was one of them
Anyway seeing as it's my free period and I am at the moment unsupervised by friends, acquaintances or the like I may as well start my letter to my mother
Can I just say this letter business is a lot harder than it seems
I think this' going to take a while
Okay so this is the best I have come up with so far
Dear Mother(I couldn't very well write Hey, Old Bat, now could I? it's very tempting though)
In response to your previous letters I have decided that I need to put a stop to this once and for all. I am not going to date Remus Lupin or indeed marry him, so I would suggest you redirect your efforts to Petunia's wedding.
There is attraction between Remus and myself, there never has been and there never will be. We have a platonic friendship that will not progress to beyond that. And I hate to point this out mother, but I think you should realise that you can make as many demands as you like, however that does not mean that I shall pay any attention to them
I will not be escorted to Hogsmeade by Remus next weekend or any weekend for that matter. You may owl me all you like but I have to ask that you leave Remus alone, he will actually read your letters as he is far too polite to follow my example of putting them in the fire.
What I plan to do for the Easter school holidays is no concern of yours either, if you insist on holidaying with the Lupins in order to create time for Remus and I to spend time together, I shall be remaining at Hogwarts for the holidays. And if you decide to come to Hogwarts to forcefully remove me from school, I shall not co-operate in any way, shape or form.
Remus will not be my 'date' for Petunia's wedding, I will not be told who I am and am not associating with, let alone in a relationship with. During the holidays I will plan my maid of honour dress, not before as my workload is far too high. I also have to ask if Daddy is aware of your incessant badgering to date Remus, as last time I talked to him he still disapproved.
I hope I have made myself perfectly clear that this scheme between Vivian and yourself will not succeed, kindly refrain from employing any more of your 'little tricks' to achieve your ridiculous objective
Lillianna
Hhhhmmmmmmmm
That looks pretty good to me, straight forward to the point and leaves no room for interpretation – exactly what is needed when talking to my mother
Oh for the love of chocolate I'm going to be late for Transfiguration
Transfiguration
Thank Merlin I'm not too late
McGonagall's lips are rather thin
Never a good thing
"Sorry I'm late Professor, Peeves was terrorising the first years again"
Which is strictly true seeing as he was indeed trying to scare the first years that were waiting out for charms, I just shot a couple of sparks at him a I ran past
Technically I wasn't lying, though I tried to clear my mind seeing as I have my suspicions that McGonagall is actually a legiliumus, she manages to catch out students every time just by looking at them, I swear she can do the weird thing where she accesses your memory
But I didn't actually have to worry because McGonagall wasn't even looking at me she was still staring at the back of the room
"Thankyou Ms Evans, please take your seat so we can get started"
I made my way to my seat next to Cam and Rhi, waving to Tri, Nessa, Sirius, James and the Twins as I went
Wait Sirius and James? What in the name of chocolate are they doing here?
I cast them both a confused look as I sat down
When I looked back at McGonagall I realised what she was glaring at, Sirius and James had obviously done something, but it's only the beginning of the lesson…
"Today, we will be continuing with self altering human transfiguration, once you have accomplished changing the colour of your eyebrows please continue on to eyelashes. And as many of you will have noticed, we have two guests today, Messrs Black and Potter, please take no notice of them."
McGonagall's left us to work while she helps Mitchell Cook with his eyebrows, last time he ended up with furry caterpillars and the addition of massive side burns
I wonder why James and Sirius are here
Cam, what are James and Sirius doing here? – LE
They got kicked out of class – CD
But it's the beginning of the lesson!
Well it seems Biggles wouldn't even let them in the Defence room, he just ordered them to come to McGonagall
Bet she loved thatOh yeah, that's why she's in such a wonderful mood, she has to supervise the rowdy half of the Marauders twice today
What did they do to get Biggles' knickers in such a knot?Well Biggles isn't such a great teacher anyway but I heard McGonagall muttering about carnivorous pink flamingos so that could mean anything
Oh dear, no wonder she was glaring at themI looked over to James and Sirius, Sirius was leaning back in his chair with his feat on the desk playing dragons and brooms with a very laid back James
They don't seem all that concerned now do they?Of course they don't, it's James and Sirius they never exert themselves in classes anyway
Don't look now but I think McGonagall's noticed their lack of remorse as well
All we have to do now is sit back and watch the show, where's the popcorn?McGonagall is now towering over the two prats who are blatantly playing a game during her class
Such idiots
"Just what do you think you are doing Mr Black, Mr Potter?"
Sirius just looks up casually
"Enjoying a nice game of Dragons and Brooms, care to join us Minnie?"
Uh oh, I don't think I can watch McGonagall's response
BAM!
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Get it off, get if off!"
Oh my giddy aunt
Er, Cam why is there a… Racoon! Attacking Mitchell Cook?
That racoon would be Melissa Darlington
Oh, she doesn't seem too happy about her new racoon status
From the way she's trying to gouge his eyes out I'd say your right
Oh dear I don't think she's going to come quietly
No, if McGonagall tries to pry her off Cook again I think she'll get more than just a bite on the hand
Is it just me or does Darlington seem a little racoon like still
Well I'm pretty sure that Melissa's hair wasn't nearly as bushy as that or quite so stripy, and I'm positive she didn't have rings around her eyes
"What were you thinking Cook? It is self alteration, there was no reason to point your wand at a fellow class member!"
"Honestly Professor, I didn't do anything! I as just trying to change my eyebrows like you told me when there was a big bang and then there was this racoon jumping on me"
"Cook, I would like to believe that but your spells often misfire, you need to learn to take better care when casting spells"
"Professor I honestly didn't do anything! My wand wasn't anywhere near Melissa, I swear"
"That is enough Cook, 10 points from Gryffindor and be grateful it isn't more"
Does this seem a little weird to you I mean I swear if Mitchell had misfired his wand it would have gone the other way
Yeah it look like that to me before as well
You don't think… Not even they would sink that low, at least I hope they wouldn't
I think they would, take a lot at Black's grin and Potter's smirk
Ooooooooh they are worse than dead
Girls Dorm
Ugh! Regulus Black needs a muzzle
Preferably one that would cut off his air supply
That silly little boy just can't keep his mouth closed can he, he always has to put in his two cents worth
He was making rude comments about Dana and Bridget at dinner concerning their ability to go through boyfriends extremely fast
I almost socked him one but Cam decided that wasn't a good idea since McGonagall was still annoyed about the Marauder's and physically restrained me
Apparently they created even more havoc in her 7th year transfiguration class by smuggling in a couple of Nessa's Doxies and letting them lose on the rest of the class
Wait there's someone at the door
It's all right Nessa got it
"Hi Melissa, what can I do for you?"
"I was wondering if I could borrow some of the twins' make up for my eyes Madam Wilks ran out of one of her potions and said she couldn't get anymore till tomorrow afternoon, I don't want to go round looking like this till then"
"Sure, Dana and Bridget have enough concealer to hide a small country"
Nessa led Melissa over to the twins' vanity and they re now trying to find the right stuff, which quite frankly could take forever seeing as there is so much rubbish to paw through
Personally I couldn't do it, the sacrifice is too great, I think I'd be driven mad by the number of identical looking labels
Thank god Dana's just appeared
"Hey Mel, how are you feeling after the racoon thing?"
Melissa's face just turned sour
"Like I could ditch Mitchell off the north tower"
That's a bit harsh
"But Melissa how do you know it was Mitchell? I mean his wand was pointing in the completely opposite direction"
She seemed to be thinking about this so I continued
"If you ask me it was Sirius or James who did it, they were just about to be blasted by McGonagall when you conveniently turned into a racoon and attacked Mitchell, even Cam thinks they did it"
Nessa and Dana rolled their eyes
Melissa however took me seriously
"Well that does make more sense, but I don't want to go scream at them"
Huh? What is the woman mad? If they did this to me they'd be lucky if they weren't racoons themselves, racoons that were being introduced to a balisk… they seem to like rodents
"Er, why not?"
Melissa looked at me horrified
"Are you joking? While I look like this? You must be mad!"
Oh for the love of….
"Well yes, then you could ask them to fix it"
I just got three blank stares in return for my stab at bringing logical reason to the world of teenage girls
Actually it was only two, Melissa's look of horror had just gone up to the 'I'm staring Voldemort in the face, he has a wand and I don't' level
"What about Lily asks James to fix seeing as she'll see him tonight at the prefect's meeting? Would that be okay?"
Nessa directed this at Melissa to calm her down but I was to understand it as more of an order than a request aimed at me
Wait a second…
"What prefect meeting?"
The three of them just stared at me again
Dana enlightened me
"The one you're going to be late for if you don't move your arse right now"
Crapolla, I'm late, again today
And I have to talk to James about the racoon thing
Oh bollocks
Hey everyone I reposted because firstly the dates were off and second the last time it was done in such a rush a number of things just went wrong. Hopefully it's now easier to read
Thanks again to everyone who reviewed
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