Welcome to Year Four.

It's going to be a bumpy ride.

Dad did some looking into the whole 'Death Eater' thing that we talked about last year. Did his best to see how deep the corruption went.

He's not entirely sure who is and isn't compromised. From what he can tell though, over half of the people in his section of the ministry are either directly on their side, don't give a damn, or are supporters of the Death Eaters. And these are the people responsible for hunting down dark creatures, which means whatever exotic critters they bring in will be likely unopposed.

That's... incredibly bad.

Either way, he didn't really have much to give Dumbledore's little band of misfits.

Did I mention that?

While we were over at G

Why do I even bother?

Let's just say it was under a Fidelius, and I can't actually name it.

Although I can definitely call it Grumpy Old Retirement Home #12, which is as close as the Fidelius goes before it chokes me.

Anyway, I spent the second half of July and three-quarters of August over there, I'd have gone longer, but I needed to stretch my wings, and even though it's not really an issue, running my glamour non-stop does actually cut into my stamina. It felt really, really good to be able to go home, be myself, and have a quick midnight flight.

Mum's also been doing some digging: after hearing Sirius's 'confession' firsthand, they ended up spending the rest of August making their way through Azkaban, searching for people who didn't really belong there.

To our luck, no one still in Azkaban is in the same category as Sirius, which is definitely a good thing.

I mean, it's still terrible, but at least they only messed up that badly once. If they had messed it up more than once, well…

I don't think we'd have done anything, but my faith in this society would likely nose dive, even more so than it already has.

From what I heard from her before I left, they had followed a duo of rather annoying Aurors around wearing a stolen Dementor cloak with a skeleton glamour up, much to said Aurors' abject terror. Apparently, the Aurors deployed there aren't trained to react correctly when hissing, laughing, and screaming noises come from above them, where a Dementor was doing nothing but stare.

Supposedly, one of them managed to get their wand caught in their robes, and, in a glorious moment of will, power and magical proficiency, fling their only source of protection a couple feet down the hallway. The other one did the smart thing and just ran to the surface screaming bloody murder.

Mum was laughing the entire time they told me the story, by the way.

Anyway. Between my parents out and about collecting information (And in mum's case, messing with people as they did so), I was left home alone.

I am really, really glad our house is extremely fireproof. And sturdy enough to handle explosions.

The train's about to get here, but I haven't seen Potter and Co yet.

Oh, there they are.

So, very, very worth it.

We're on the train now, but Ginny and Potter are still beet red, Weasley is in his usual stunned silence, but is glaring at Potter slightly, and Granger's doing her absolute best to hold in the laughter.

Apparently, no, Potter and Ginny haven't slept with one another yet.

I can't stress enough that neither of the two have refuted what I said though. I find this both hilarious, and sort of... depressing, really.

I don't know why I feel that way though. Either way, it'll probably pass.

Granger's finally recovered (although not without a final choking snort), and is retrieving something from her backpack. I should probably put this down.

Granger's on the ball this time: she's apparently spent the entire summer going over every spellbook, years one to six. She tried to get her hands on a year seven book, but they wouldn't sell her it, due to some sort of rule. Honestly, I'm pretty certain it's so that no over-eager student flips through one and blows themselves up.

Right.

Granger can't cast many of the higher-year spells, but she's got a big list of potentially-useful spells compiled. I looked through them, and there's not a single one on the list that isn't there for a reason.

The list was pretty solid, but the problem was that they were solutions, not answers.

A lot of the spells were either high-cost, or were really specialised. They did the job they were supposed to do, but weren't very flexible, meaning that while she (who I can only assume is able to remember everything) might benefit the most from the list, people like me (who has issues remembering big lists of spells) can't really remember what exact spell to use in each situation.

And that's when I brought out the list of spells I was planning on practicing with Ginny. Sure, there was a lot of overlap (some of the spells were just too good to pass up), and it was only about half the length, but where Granger's list was all about the best way to do things, mine was about flexible answers. Even better, I had shown the list to Luna last year, and there were a few spells on the list which I doubt any sane person would even believe to exist.

I had to test a few to make sure Luna wasn't pulling my leg. To my joy, she definitely was not.

I had already written down the incantations next to a majority of the spells, although I had a much harder time trying to explain their hand motions. With luck, we'll be able to get them from either Luna, or the books.

Of course, Granger raised an eyebrow when she got down to some of my more niche spells. Spells which I'm certain aren't in the books she had read. She did seem rather excited when she hit the Backlash Curse (my father's anti-shield/enchanted item dispelling curse), along with the Insensus Curse (One of Luna's mother's old creations, which causes a person's sight and hearing to be reversed).

She's still going over my list, pen in hand, occasionally stopping to ask what some of the weirder spells do.

Meanwhile, Potter and Ginny have finally returned to natural color, although Ginny's still glaring at me, for having put her through the wringer.

I think I'll go over my stuff again, give Granger some time to make sure everything's set up.

Malfoy is apparently still here. He was escorted by the usual two blobs of meat, one of which was picking its nose with its wand. Part of me worries that it'll somehow blow itself up some time today, incriminating us. Luckily, to do that, the blob would need to actually cast something, so we should be safe. Oh, and Malfoy's finally acknowledged my existence!

I can tell, because he called me a blood traitor! While technically correct in more than one way, it is reassuring to know that I'm in the same category of Potter, who is still goddamn terrifying, and Sirius Black, who is a nice guy, once you get to know him.

I of course told Malfoy that I might come to be interested in him, if not for his hair. If he could do something about the godawful mess, I'd think about it, I said.

Needless to say, while Malfoy can handle threats to his person, to his honor, and to his life, he cannot handle anyone insulting the sheer, pureblooded majesty that is his heavily-product-ed head-covering, and thus fled in shame.

Just kidding. He called me a blood-traitor whore unfit to serve as a slave, and then went back to ignoring me. Apparently Potter is more fun to make fun of.

Either way, I've cast my lots, and I can't back out, whether I want to or not.

Anyway, after he left, Granger cast a quick Doubling Charm on my list, then handed me back the original copy (I think. It doesn't have as strong of a signature, so I'm assuming it's the original one), and stated that she'd go over what I've given her.

The trip's coming to an end, picking up to move.

Oh hell.

Oh bloody hell.

Yeah, we're all fucked. Especially me.

Ginny must've heard the 'Aura is a Veela' rumor last year, because she's sitting to my left and won't let me mope alone. It's nice, I guess, but it's not fixing the problem.

Say hello to this year's Defense Teacher.

Now, the magical world is a joke, we already know this.

But it seems, this year, I'm

We're the punch line.

Now, when I entered this world, I didn't know much about the people in it. Hell, I still don't know who a majority of the people are.

Unfortunately, I recognise this one.

Delores Umbridge.

Umbridge is everything wrong with this place.

She was dressed like a

I don't even really have anything to compare to her. She was pink.

So very much pink. So hideously, hideously pink. She was like an inhuman blob-woman which fell into a vat of pink dye, and then told by either a really jackass god, or Satan himself that, yes indeed, she could be a princess if she wanted to.

Now, I have a good reason to not want to be near her: my mothers, my father, and I did some research on people most likely to cause an international incident chasing after us, if they were to find out the secret.

We then made a list of the most idiotic, the most racist, and the most batshit insane.

Umbridge was in the top three for all four lists. With an impressive history of batshit, burn-the-witch binary insanity, a network of contacts that we couldn't see the end of, and a history of being nosy enough to believe that she owns the entire universe, she was immediately placed on our fifth 'avoid at all costs' list.

And now she's here, teaching Defense.

I was good at Defense too! This isn't fair. I wanted to at least be good at one of the spellcasting courses...

Ginny finally butted in to ask what language I was writing in.

I told her it was Infernal, because honestly, it feels wrong to lie about her for something so trivial.

My schedule is similar to last year, but honestly, I don't know what I can do. I can skip the ghost, yes, but if I skip Umbridge... Even worse, what if she shows up for the ghost's class and I'm not there? Does that paint a target on me? Is it worth it?

Fuck, is this what Potter thought when Voldemort showed up?

What do I do?

Ginny decided to levitate Cinder onto my head. Because 'that's where the salamanders end up going, anyway'. Needless to say, Cinder went along with it, and is now sleeping in my hair.

Then Ginny told me to lighten up. That I'm not allowed to be whiny, if I accuse her of being that all of the time. Also, that I'm murmuring gibberish to myself. I guess I should calm down, right?

Right. Besides the

Let's just ignore it for now.

The year started the same as always: in comes the new kids (although there's a lot more than the last few years), singing hat, the sorting, and then the announcement that Quidditch was once again in session, and that the team captains were highly advised to begin recruitment as quickly as possible.

And then Umbridge cut him off, running a cock and bull story about she had been deployed to Hogwarts by the Ministry to identify potential security risks at Hogwarts. There was a general murmur of assent from those who didn't know her, but honestly, I don't know if she'll be able to do anything beneficial. I'm almost certain she's just here to keep an eye on Dumbledore.

Anyway, Dumbledore was looking absolutely miserable when he went with the flow, and introduced the new 'teacher', he looked like he hadn't had much sleep in the last while. I can feel his pain, there.

From there, he finished his speech, but without his momentum to keep it going, he dropped the usual gibberish at the end, before sitting back down instead. I've never seen him do that before.

The meal was great as always, but it felt a bit like eating a sandwich in a bear cave. I mean, sandwich might be great, but there's still a chance of being eaten by a bear. You know what I'm saying?

I really wish that the Defense curse would kick in and kill her, but the last three instructors have left in one piece, so it's not likely.

Dumbledore called us in almost immediately after the speech.

Luckily, he managed to remember to call in all six of us, so we were there within ten minutes.

So, here's the story as to why Umbridge is here.

Apparently, his little attempt at a reveal was taken in the absolute worst way. After a few not-too-subtle nudges from a few high-station Death-Eater supporters, Dumbledore's now pretty much under the magnifying glass.

He said that he'd have an extremely difficult time trying to talk to any of us for the rest of the year: with the ministry stooge effectively holding the school hostage (he actually said stooge, much to my surprise), he's all but bound. As is, he was only able to call us in because Umbridge was still unpacking, and thus was indisposed for the next hour and a bit.

Long story short, he's pretty much at the end of his wits, because he has no idea what the idiots are going to do next. He knows who and what Umbridge is, but he can't do anything about it.

He of course did not say idiot.

I did ask what I was supposed to do… and I'm definitely not happy about it.

The only way to avoid Umbridge's eye is to keep a veneer of normalcy, so I actually need to start going to the ghost's class. Even worse, it's likely she'll be breaking into other classes as well. Low profile, is what he told the six of us. Low profile, and try not to paint a target on ourselves.

And then came the time to ask about Potter's training.

The answer was simple, but also said terrible things about what was to come.

Apparently, the Minister was 'informed' that he (Dumbledore) was attempting to build an army, so Umbridge will likely be on the lookout for the training of any large group of armed individuals.

We pretty much all collectively groaned. If she is as bad as Dumbledore was hinting, 'large' meant 'any number larger than zero', and 'armed individuals' means 'anyone with two arms and a brain'.

Essentially, if Potter's to get any training at all, we'll need to find a place to train where we can't be seen.

Dumbledore suggested a place known as the 'Come and Go' room, but warned that if Umbridge were to find the room, and realise what it was, we'd have a lot more pressing issues at hand.

It's… located…

Goddammit, Dumbledore. It's the place where Ginny was held last year!

Ginny is not amused. I of course told her what I had pieced together.

Either way, we're going to probably get started in the Chamber, as the place is nasty, yeah, but it's definitely got a hell of a lot better security than wherever the room is. We might swap to the room if need-be, but for now, we'll stick to the impenetrable fortress.

So, here we are, at Hogwarts.

Once again, we're in significant danger. Unfortunately, this time it's my fault.

If I get revealed, Voldemort is the least of Potter's worries. He might actually get executed for willingly associating with a rogue Dark Creature. It's happened before, if the stories dad's been able to dig up are anything to believe.

Ginny

Goddamit.

So I need to keep the charade tight.

Oh no.

The Veela-blood rumor. Sure, Veela aren't dark per-say, but

Since when will Umbridge care about little things like that?

I entirely forgot. I knocked a huge hole in my charade to let the steam out, and it might well be the reason I sink.

I'm in hell. I'm in hell, and I need to walk like I'm on eggshells.

Because now? If I screw up? It's a lot more than myself that's going to take the fall here.

Well, at least I haven't confirmed it: if I had, I'd probably already be strung up.

Either way, this year's going to be a mess.

But when is it ever not?