"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine

You make me happy when skies are grey

You'll never know dear, how much I love you

Please don't take my sunshine away…"

Danny stood at the door out of sight, listening to his wife singing to their son to sleep. He dropped off with her singing and Clara lay him down carefully, backing out of the room so she kept her eye on Ethan until she closed the door to. Danny had moved to lean against the wall, smiling at her. "I love hearing you sing."

"The main thing is that he does," she blushed a little and they went downstairs. "It's my secret weapon."

"I'm not complaining," he caught her and kissed her gently. "How are you feeling about tomorrow?"

Clara stayed in his grasp, "mmm a little better right now," she smiled.

"That is not what I meant," he let go and gave her a more serious look.

"I'm okay, honestly. I know you have to go back to work and Ethan's getting better. I'm getting pretty good at doing everything one-handed anyway," she chuckled and put the kettle on. "Are you sorted for going back?" Danny paused, "I didn't think so. Go and sort yourself out while I make tea."

While the kettle boiled she stared out of the window. In all honesty, she was absolutely terrified for tomorrow - the thought of doing a whole day on her own with no help was scaring her. What if it was a bad day? What if he wouldn't stop crying because his Dad wasn't around? There was nobody to call on - all her friends worked at the school. How was she going to cope if she didn't sleep much tonight? There were so many questions.

She made the tea, still thinking about it all and completely unaware of when Danny came back down. "What you thinking about?" he asked, making Clara jump and drop the teabag she was taking out. "Oops, sorry," he picked it up for her, cleaning up the mess. "Question still stands."

"Oh, nothing much really. Just trying to decide if there's anything I should get done now while he's down," she stirred in the milk and put it back in the fridge.

"You have done the whole house twice today, just relax for a few minutes and then we can get to bed, promise?"

"Promise."

#-#-#-#

A dream is a wish your heart makes,

When you're fast asleep,

In dreams, you lose your heartaches,

Whatever you wish for, you keep…

"You're being so good for Mummy today," she whispered as he dropped off and she was able to put him down. Clara sat on the stool next to the cot, putting her hand through to gently stroke his cheek.

Ethan had been up a couple of times during the night but since they'd been up he'd barely cried once unless he was hungry. This was the first time he'd slept, but there wasn't too much that needed doing around the house. In fact right now she could stay in this exact position all day if she could, however Clara hadn't eaten since breakfast and now was probably her best chance so she grabbed the monitor and stuck it on her waistband before going down to the kitchen.

She was quite surprised to hear the knock on the door and her first instinct was to grab the monitor and make sure Ethan hadn't stirred. Thankfully all Clara could hear was his gentle breathing so she made her way to the door and opened it. "Oh, Linda hi… what are you doing here?"

"Visiting my grandson obviously?"

"He's not-" Clara started, but quickly decided against it, "he's asleep at the moment. Why are you actually here?"

Linda let herself in and Clara rolled her eyes, shutting the door. "Meeting for work - thought I'd stop by."

"You never just stop by, I know you come down to London a lot," Clara pointed out. Something was suspicious here.

"Fine, I'll get to the point. You need to stop calling your Dad so much." Linda sat herself down and crossed her arms and legs, giving Clara a stern look.

Clara took a deep breath, "just make yourself at home why don't you," she spoke under her breath before returning to the conversation. "Sorry what?"

"He's always on that damn tablet talking to you."

"We talk for an hour in the evening so he can see his grandson, why is that a problem? And why is it your problem?" Clara didn't really know where to start with all this. The whole point of getting him the iPad was to stop him having to come down so much and she hadn't seen him in person since.

Linda looked at her as if she was meant to know the answer to that. "And then he comes off the phone and it's all he'll bloody talk about. It needs to stop."

"Linda he's just become a Grandad for the first time, he's bound to be excited and it's not my job to control that. I'm sure over time we'll stop talking quite so often but it's either this or he'd be down all the time," Clara sighed, refusing to sit down herself.

Unfortunately, she couldn't seem to get through to her step-mother that this wasn't an issue. "Oh come on you're just trying to use this to get him back!"

Clara immediately shushed her, "please keep your voice down for crying out loud," she checked the monitor again. "I am doing nothing of the sort. He's my Dad, I'm allowed to talk to him. Now can you get out please before you wake him?"

"Always so polite," Linda smiled sarcastically. "So where is the little man then?" she stood up and made her way towards the stairs.

"What are you doing? You can't just go up there Linda, please I've not long got him settled," Clara followed her.

Linda kept going, "oh relax sweetheart I'm only going to have a look!"

"Volume please, he needs to rest and you need to leave right now," Clara kept on her tail as she walked into their bedroom and turned on the light.

There was nothing to stop her now when she walked over to the cot. "Well aren't you the image of your father. You got lucky." Clara groaned, running a hand through her hair trying to work out what to do. He hadn't stirred yet but then… "you want to meet your Granny don't you Ethan?" she leant in and immediately his eyes opened, as did his lungs.

"Don't you dare touch him," Clara approached her immediately, trying to get herself between Linda and her son.

"Aww he just wants a cuddle don't you," Linda kept moving and with seemingly little choice, Clara pushed her out the way and managed to grab Ethan, trying to comfort him. "Oh you will regret that."

"I really don't think I will," Clara replied. "Just get out of my house before I call the police!"

Linda rolled her eyes, "I'm sure your Dad will love to hear this story."

"I'm sure you'll put the appropriate twist on the story," she scowled, but thankfully her step-mother left shortly after, not without some serious glaring. "Oh darling it's okay, you're safe baby," she held Ethan close and walked around with him. He was screaming, the shock of the strange woman trying to pick him up clearly too much.

Over in Killarney, many years ago

My Mother sang a song to me in tones so sweet and low,

Just a simple little ditty, in her good old Irish way,

And I'd give the world if she could sing that song to me this day.

Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral!

She kept singing to him, this was one of her favourites from when her own Mum would sing to her as a child. Ethan liked it too, and after a few minutes he settled a little but didn't want to go back to sleep. "I'm sorry sweetheart, I'm so sorry." The interaction with Linda had tired her out, coupled with having to settle Ethan down again she could no longer stay stood up. He wouldn't even let her move him away from her chest now. "You've only just been fed sweetie, you're not hungry are you? Are you scared? She's gone now."

Ethan kept nuzzling into her so Clara decided to use the cloth sling, wrapping him up tight and close. "That better sweetheart? Nice and close," she stood back up and made her way downstairs, finally able to eat the food she was sorting and sit down properly.

By the time she'd finished eating he was dropping off again. Clara kissed his head softly, humming to him quietly to help Ethan drop to sleep. As he fell asleep so did she, finally giving in to the fatigue from the afternoon.

Danny woke her when he got in from work, albeit a little reluctantly as the sight of his two favourite people sleeping was wonderful. "Hey, everything okay?" he whispered as she stirred.

"Mmm," she rubbed her eyes a little, moving to sit up slightly but being careful not to wake him. "Yeah, sorry must have dropped off once he'd settled. He wanted to be close," Clara looked down to Ethan and kissed his head. "He was really good his morning and then Linda turned up."

"What?" Danny moved to sit beside her on the sofa. "What did she want?"

"I think she wanted to persuade me to stop talking to my Dad," Clara sighed, the events coming back to her. "To be honest she might have succeeded."

"Don't be silly you wouldn't stop talking to him," Danny rubbed her back.

Shaking her head Clara sat up a little more. "I think Dad might stop talking to me actually. I kinda attacked his wife."

Danny raised an eyebrow, "really?"

"She wouldn't leave! I asked so many times for her to be quiet, she just walked up to our room and woke up Ethan and he was terrified, I had to stop her Danny. But she'll tell him, she'll have phoned him straight away." Clara reached for her husband's hand. "It's fine, it's a problem for another day. Need to focus on Ethan now."

He squeezed her hand in reassurance, "he's stirring now."

"Yeah, he'll be hungry. As am I, dinner?" she asked and smiled up at him.

"Consider me cooking," he kissed her quickly and jumped up.

#-#-#-#

A few weeks after Danny had gone back to work and Clara woke up at 6am completely confused. She carefully climbed out of bed and walked over to the cot to check on Ethan who was smiling in his sleep and Clara let out a breath she hadn't realised she'd been holding. "Don't scare Mummy like that," she muttered under her breath and grabbed the nearby stool - she liked to sit and watch him sleep.

"Everything okay?" Danny replied sleepily and sat up behind her.

She nodded, "he slept through. I fed him at half 11 and he's still asleep."

Danny got out of bed now and walked around, standing behind her and placing his hands on her shoulders, massaging gently while he looked down at his son. "Clever boy," he smiled.

"Mmm very clever boy," she agreed, "I just hope that doesn't mean he won't sleep during the day because I need to get some housework done."

He chuckled, "you'll just have to take it as it comes. Don't worry about the house it can wait," Danny leant down and kissed her. "Why don't you go get yourself sorted while you've got a chance."

Clara smiled gratefully and stood up, going off to shower. Just as she'd left the room Ethan began to wake up, stretching his tiny limbs and making small noises as if he was ready to grizzle. Danny immediately picked him up, "hey little man. We're going to let Mummy get ready in peace aren't we?" he started to go downstairs. "Yes. Good boy, we'll get you fed downstairs I know there's some milk to be had."

Thankfully Danny was able to sort him a bottle and fed him, sitting down on the sofa. "Clever boy. You're 3 months old tomorrow, how did that happen eh?" Ethan happily fed on the bottle and they knew he liked being spoken too, especially since the incident with Linda he liked to know his parents were around. That reminded him - he needed to call Dave. Clara's Dad hadn't spoken to her since Linda had been around and it was upsetting her, whatever she said.

Ethan finished up the bottle and Danny put it down so he could reposition his son to wind him. "Ooo good boy, better out than in eh?"

Clara rolled her eyes as she walked in, "you are going to teach that boy bad habits."

"Just fulfilling my fatherly duties," he replied. "You look lovely."

"Flattery will get you most places, but not right now. I'll put the kettle on and then take him so you can get ready for work." Clara went to the kitchen to make tea.

Danny stood up, still patting Ethan's back softly. "You going to be good for Mummy today? I know you can be." As if on cue, Ethan burped, gurgled and squealed a little. "Yes exactly." He walked through to the kitchen where Clara was just stirring the teas. "He's getting quite grabby," Danny commented as Ethan somehow got hold of his Dad's ear.

Clara laughed at his current predicament, "yes he is. That's why I've not worn a necklace or earrings the last couple of days." She put her mug down, "stop trying to pull Daddy's ear off you cheeky monkey." Clara grabbed his hand and he took her finger immediately which she waved a little to make him giggle. "Come on then you, we'd better let Daddy get ready."

Danny handed Ethan to her, promising not to be too long and taking his tea with him. Clara walked through to the lounge and decided to experiment with something, placing Ethan down slowly on his sensory mat. He immediately started grizzling but Clara started moving some of the hanging objects and as she'd hoped - this distracted him. Wriggling around he started reaching for them, evidently amused everytime he accidentally made one wobble. She stayed on the floor, watching him and occasionally helping out and speaking to him to reassure him she was still there. "Hey look at that he's on the floor!" Danny commented when he came back downstairs.

"Mmm having a great time too aren't we kiddo?" she rubbed his cheek a little. "I'm going to try something else…" Clara slowly stood up and walked over to the table where she'd left her tea, picking it up.

"Well look at that he's distracted," Danny replied. "I'm going to sort breakfast - I'll get you some too."

"Thanks, I think leaving the room might be a step too far," Clara smiled and sat on the sofa watching him play, sipping at her tea - it was quite special to drink hot tea at the moment. She decided to make use of the moment to quickly dust down the sides, occasionally interacting with Ethan to keep him settled.

Danny rolled his eyes when he walked back in, "just sit down for a second love."

"I've just finished, I'm making the most of his downtime," she smiled, taking the bowl from him. "You're a star."

They ate breakfast while Ethan continued to entertain himself with a purple elephant. Clara rested her head down on Danny's shoulder to watch him, smiling softly. "I need to get going," he broke their silence. "Not that I want to."

"Mmm," she complained. "When will you be back tonight?"

"4, you're meeting Grace tonight so I'll leave straight away."

"Oh yeah it's Tuesday, thanks for the reminder," she sat up. "Have a great day."

Danny kissed her and stood up. "Look after yourself yeah?" Clara nodded, watching him go. Once he had she slipped down onto the floor to lie alongside Ethan's mat and playing with him.

He seemed so happy today, more so than she'd seen him before. "You're my special boy, I'm so lucky."

Clara could have quite happily stayed there all day but was interrupted by the door being knocked which forced her to stand up. She glanced at the clock and realised she'd been laying there for a good 2 hours which probably explained why her side was now numb. Somehow Ethan was still entertained so she made her way to the door and opened it. "Oh, James hi... come on in I guess?" she moved out of the way but Ethan had clearly noticed she was no longer in the room and started screaming. "Sorry, shut the door behind you," she ran in and picked him up. "It's okay darling it's okay," she jiggled him gently.

James joined her in the living room having taken his shoes and coat off out of politeness. "Do you want me to stick the kettle on?"

"Why are you here?" Clara kept trying to settle Ethan, "sorry I didn't mean to sound so harsh it's just… well, we haven't been in the same room alone since we split."

"I know, I'm sorry to just turn up but I needed to talk to you. It's been a long time since we split and things have moved on for both of us. We both have children…" James looked ridiculously nervous, his hands clasped together.

Clara sighed, "right okay just sit down and I'll go and make the tea. You take the child, I'm going to be singing just go with it." James didn't argue, taking Ethan who looked distinctly confused but was no longer screaming. Clara went into the kitchen to make tea, singing one of Ethan's favourite songs as she went to keep him happy.

Lullaby and goodnight,

With roses bedight,

With lilies o'er spread

Is baby's wee bed.

Lay thee down now and rest,

May thy slumber be blessed…

She returned with the tea and placed his mug down, taking Ethan back once she'd sat down on the sofa. He immediately grabbed onto her hair and Clara had to prize it out of his hand carefully, "I love you but you gotta stop that kiddo." She reached over and managed to grab a toy on the floor for him to hold. "There we go."

"You're really good with him, he loves your voice - his eyes were searching for you the whole time you were singing," James smiled. "You're a great Mum."

"It's a good day," Clara replied, "so why are you here?"

James nodded, "right yeah… I wanted to talk to you first because the last thing I want to do is upset you. I know it's kinda late for that but just go with me here. I'm thinking about asking Grace to marry me…"

Clara didn't reply straight away and instead found herself looking down at Ethan as he seemed to be trying to pull his toy apart. Thankfully for the rabbit, he didn't quite have the strength yet to cause any injury. She knew this day would come for Grace and James, they were close and Grace was happy. She also knew that she was married and happy with a son and she really shouldn't be feeling any significant emotion for this. "Why are you asking me? It's been years."

"It still happened. We were still there once. You're Grace's best friend, I know how hard it was to accept her back and I also know you still don't like seeing me very much," he replied quietly.

Without looking up Clara nodded, not going to deny what he said. "To be honest James what I think about you is irrelevant. You make my best friend happy, you're a good Dad to your daughter. I'm not going to stop you or complain and I'll be there for Grace all the way," Clara was honest with him, and she looked up now. "But I swear if you ever do to her what you did to me I'll hunt you down and it will be much worse than the first time around. Got that?"

James nodded, "absolutely. I swear I won't it's-"

"Don't try and explain it. I know. We were never going to work James, we both knew that even before it all happened. I never truly got over Danny leaving and you… well I don't really know but there we go. Ask her, and also appreciate I have to spend a whole evening with Grace tonight and I can't tell her," Clara smiled a little.

"I'll owe you," he also smiled. "Thank you Clara, for everything."

"Oh you better be. Why aren't you at work anyway?" she asked, pulling on the rabbit slightly to entertain Ethan.

"Working from home today," he pointed out.

Clara nodded, "mm yes I can see that."

James rolled his eyes, "you have not changed one bit."

"You have. You're skiving from work!" she smiled. "I'm glad you're relaxing a bit."

"You were always right, I needed to slow down."

She nodded, "I usually was." Ethan interrupted the conversation there, deciding he was hungry. "Ah, mind if I-"

"Go for it, I should get going anyway I do actually need to do some sort of work today and I'm picking Lizzie up from the childminder just after lunch. It was good to see you - genuinely." James stood up and took his mug through to wash up. He reappeared and grabbed his coat.

Clara started feeding Ethan while James sorted himself out. "I'll see you soon then. Make sure Grace phones me straight away." They both knew she would.

Once he'd seen himself out the house was quiet again and Clara sat back, watching Ethan and thinking over what he'd said.

#-#-#-#

"You are on another planet tonight, Danny said Ethan slept through?" Grace stopped what she was previously talking about to get Clara's attention back.

Clara was jolted from her mind wandering, looking back. Grace had been discussing relationship things which was exactly what she didn't need tonight with the secret she was now keeping. "Sorry, yeah he did. Guess I still have a lot of sleep to catch up on. He's been really good today though, even let me put him down as long as I was in the same room."

"Progress," Grace replied. "And you're really doing okay?"

"Yeah I am, honestly. It's actually easier than I expected," Clara replied. "Just gets a bit lonely some days. I've started taking him out and things but I'm so used to having people to talk to all the time, or children asking me questions."

Grace smiled in sympathy, "I know how it feels. You should get yourself to one of the mother and baby groups - the one I went to was great and you can meet other Mums there. I promise you you'll enjoy it."

She'd been trying to get her to go for a couple of weeks now but Clara wasn't really sure. "Go on, just go tomorrow for me. If you don't like it you don't have to go again it's not like a subscription."

"Okay, alright I'll try it. Promise. But if I don't like it then you owe me a huge glass of wine," Clara grinned, finally feeling properly back in the room.

"Deal. Might buy you one now anyway to settle your nerves," Grace winked and went up to the counter, ordering for them.