**A/N: Ah, so yes... This is a little late considering I always have the updates up early in the morning. My one excuse? I forgot it was Thursday.

And I was getting my hair done and YES it did take all day. It really did. :$

Chapter 35- Still Haunted

"Can you sleep when you lie down or are you still haunted? Are you missing the fight now? Does it feel like you're broke? Do you stare out window and pray for a good storm? Some way to get reborn? Do you forget that you're gone? And that the break of the blue morning dawn? Do you believe in the flash of a dream, I'm with you? Do you slip back in time, stay still and try not to move?"

~That's What I Do, Sam Palladio

Sitting back in his chair, he watched the news reel on his computer. He had turned it on to enjoy the terror HYDRA was silently reigning on the world, but instead he saw Bethany and Steve Rogers, looking happy and carefree. He scoffed, watching the healthy glow of her skin. That smile, he said with a sickening thought. HYDRA's plans for her had fallen through all together, but there was still a chance on completing them.

He was low enough on the HYDRA scale for his opinion and ideas not to matter, but he knew it was what they all wanted. In one way or another, the couple and their unborn child had been the bane to their existence. But the baby would prove useful to them in the future. It made him both sick and gave him pleasure to see them so happy, because he knew it wouldn't last long.

His phone started to ring and he gave a small smile at the caller ID. "Jen, how are you?" He asked, muting the news reel.

"I'm fine," Jen answered. "I just wanted to check up on you."

The line was silent, making him sigh. "Still thinking about what they said, huh?"

"Bethany has no reason to lie to me," Jen responded. "I just…"

"I'm not a part of HYDRA," he lied smoothly. "You know me better than that. Okay? Some of my friends were HYDRA, yes. And when the war in SHIELD broke out, I had no idea what was going on. Of course, I was going to attack the people shooting my friends."

"I believe you," Jen said after a sigh. He smiled at how easily she bought into his lie. She was so naïve, all she really wanted was attention. Someone to pull out her chair and pay for dates. All things he was ready to give to her, in exchange for information on Bethany those few months ago. He rarely achieved anything, the information not helping him up the totem pole much, but now his plans were bigger.

He knew how much Bethany and Steve loved Theo, and he was willing to use that to his advantage. He just needed to wait until the right moment to strike, to gather others on his plan and help bring him higher within the organization. Jen was just collateral damage and someone to lay with on a cold winter's night. Someone so desperate for love, she couldn't see the deception right in front of her.

"When can you come back?" Jen asked. He sighed. He knew it wasn't safe. He knew that they were waiting for him to make real contact with Jen. HYDRA had supplied him with a trackless phone when he brought up that he was dating someone who had relations to the Rogers'. He had hoped they'd give him more, but HYDRA wasn't as generous as SHIELD. That didn't matter though. HYDRA had a better overall idea than SHIELD.

"When I can prove my innocence," he told her, a notification popping up on his screen. HYDRA. "Listen, I have to go. Talk to you soon?"

"Okay. Love you, stay safe," Jen said, blowing a kiss through the phone.

"You too," He responded, face blank before hanging up and throwing his phone across the bed before opening his e-mail, a sickening smile splitting his face in two.

She was there. He knew it. It was all over the news. He saw her—and him—on one of the televisions in the café he was seeking refuge in. She looked stunning, like a shimmering star, radiating inside and out. Her smile, pure bliss as Steve's arm was wrapped around her waist. That was what he wanted. Because even the look on Steve's face was enough to make him fight through the demonic battle he was fighting. How the man's hand slowly crept from Bethany's hip to her round stomach, his smile growing, Bethany turning to look at him and capturing a small kiss.

The crowd's camera flashes became wild, like they were glamour stars. And in a way, they were. At least, they looked the part. And they were playing the part. And while he knew that they were playing a part, this not really being either of them, he could tell that they were both really happy and he was jealous. He had nothing. He had no one. He didn't even have himself. It had been weeks since his liberation from HYDRA, and he was even more lost now than he was before. More questions, no answers. He knew deep in his heart that Steve and Bethany both held the key to his questions, but he was terrified to face them again.

Violent urges would flood through him during the day. He'd see small injustices and want to tear people apart. Push and pull his way through crowds. Kick and scream until people bended to his will. He didn't trust himself with Bethany. With Steve. He didn't want to face either of them, but he knew he had to see them. Just a glimpse. And not from a television screen.

The reason he moved to New York was because he thought he could build up the courage to ask for help. Help with what, he wasn't sure. Because he still didn't know if he wanted to know about his past. About what happened to him and what was to become of his future. But he knew that Bethany would help him either way.

"Can I get you anything?" The brunette waitress asked, hovering by his table, but keeping a safe distance.

"No," he grumbled, his voice hoarse and tense. He watched as the waitress took half a step back, looking like she was very frightened. "Thank you," he added as an afterthought, the words tasting bitter in his mouth. The waitress gave a small nod before turning to the next table.

Way to go, you can't even have a civil encounter, he thought, his jaw clenching. He watched as another waitress sauntered by him with a tuna melt sandwich, serving it to its owner. The smell was intoxicating. He hadn't been eating much, or anything at all. He didn't have any money. He had been breaking into apartments when the owners were out of town, hiding in department stores until after hours and sometimes just wandering the streets all throughout the night. He would shower at community centers, steal some clothes out of lockers, but he had nothing and no one of his own. He didn't even have himself.

"Where did you get 25 million dollars?!" Steve said as he pulled her away after the auction. "We don't have 25 million dollars!"

"Is that freaking out?" Bethany asked with a small smile. "Is that yelling?"

"It's a simple question," Steve stressed, looking frazzled. "Bethany, we can't afford that! Not with you also dishing out money for SHIELD families in need-"

"Hey," Bethany said, gesturing wildly with her hands. "We both agreed to that."

"Just because we're staying at the Tower rent-free, and had almost all of the baby's things bought for us doesn't mean we can just be careless-" Steve ranted, his voice getting louder with each word and gathering attention from everyone within the earshot.

"Shh," Bethany said quietly, catching the dirty gazes. "Will you be quiet?"

"Where did you get 25 million dollars?" Steve asked with a long sigh, pulling her into an even more secluded area.

"I… earned it," Bethany said slowly.

"When? And why didn't you tell me?" Steve asked, still trying to wrap his head around being married to a millionaire.

"Because money doesn't mean much to me," Bethany explained with a shrug. "And it was only recently."

"I would like to know the specifics," Steve insisted, reaching out to push a stray curl back into Bethany's bun.

She let out a small sigh, nodding her head. "And you deserve that."

"Tony, it's not what you think-" Bethany tried to explain as she looked over a copy of Howard's will.

"So tell me what it is," Tony said, crossing his arms. "Because this is hard cold, solid proof."

Bethany sighed, feeling a headache coming on. She had been certain that every and all evidence towards this document had been destroyed. "Alright, just… just listen to the whole story."

"All I need to know is why you didn't tell me that he left everything to you," Tony expressed.

Bethany closed her eyes, shaking her head slightly. "It's not that black and white, okay? Despite your beliefs and experiences, he did love you. He didn't show it in a way a traditional dad would, but he gave you all the resources to thrive in this world. A lot of people depended on him, and you got the short end of the stick. That wasn't right. I knew that, and I think he did too. But he did love you."

Tony let the words sink in, but didn't let them phase his appearance. "This doesn't show that Bethany."

"He wrote that will when you were a kid. He left the company to me because we built it up together. Look… Tony, I was supposed to be dead, so very few people knew about this. Which is why it was easy hiding it."

"And why did you?" Tony pressed on.

"Because Howard and I didn't agree on it. I thought he should leave it you. He thought you were too irresponsible. You proved his point with some bad press the next day. I couldn't argue. But your dad did tell me that when you proved that you were responsible, he would leave the company to you. It's just he died before that could happen."

"I was just a kid," Tony said quietly.

"I know," Bethany nodded. "But you needed to know that your dad loved you. And this was the only way I could help show you. So I destroyed all the documents, save this one apparently."

"But it was all left to you," Tony stressed.

"I never needed it. The company, the money. It wouldn't have gotten me anywhere," Bethany said with a small shrug.

"But it's yours," Tony repeated.

"What are you trying to prove?" Bethany asked, confused.

"I owe you. Money that is rightfully yours."

Bethany shook her head. "Kid, you owe me nothing. I don't want your money. You've already taken me and Steve in, with a baby on the way. Shown us more compassion than anyone ever has."

"Look, ever since I found this," he said, pointing to the will. "I haven't been able to sleep right. Spend right. Because I keep seeing my dad's face, yelling at me that it's yours. So for my sanity, will you just take some money? Please?"

"For your sanity?" Bethany said with a chuckle. "Sure. How much?"

"How about a billion?" Tony offered.

Bethany choked on her breath, shaking her head as she coughed. "No. Then I won't be able to sleep."

"50 million then. Not a penny less," Tony said strictly.

"Can I do whatever I want with it?" Bethany tested.

"As long as I can get the image of dad out of my head, you can do whatever," Tony said with a wave of his hand.

"Where did you even find this?" Bethany asked, holding up the document.

"There's a lot of stuff in storage," Tony explained. "I-uh… a lot of the photos in the baby's room, I found there. I wanted to get a peek, see if I could find anymore. It was with a photo album of you that I had never seen."

"A photo album?" Bethany said, brows furrowed. "What was in it?"

"Some really old baby photos," Tony began. "Photos of you growing up, a few of you and Steve."

Bethany let out an amused sound. "There are so many photos of us, I don't even remember the majority of them being taken."

"Yeah, it looks that way," Tony said with a nod. "A lot of you two not looking at the camera. It's on my floor, if you want it."

"Thanks kid," Bethany replied with a small smile. "For everything. I know you wave it off as nothing, but everything you've done for me, Steve and this baby? I needed this. So thank you."

"It's nothing-" He tried.

"It's everything," Bethany corrected.

Steve looked at her with a completely blank face. "So we… we have 25 million dollars? For us? At this very moment?"

Bethany chuckled. "Well, a little less than that, since yeah, I sent some to some SHIELD families as compensation. But we don't need 25 million dollars."

"No, we don't," Steve said, still trying to wrap this around his head.

"But I figured we could put it all in savings. In case something ever happens. Savings for the kids, savings for a house…"

Steve's smile almost split his face. "I really like the sound of that."

"Thank you for not yelling at me," Bethany said with a twist of her hips, in that classic flirtatious way of hers. "Well, sort of. And the night it still young."

"Are you… planning on another surprise?" Steve asked cautiously, afraid of what his wife would come up with next.

"Nothing in particular," Bethany teased with a wink.

"Can I know his name yet?" Steve asked, looking like a kid on Christmas morning. "Please?" He leaned in to steal a chaste kiss.

"Well…" Bethany said slowly, dragging out the suspense. "I'll tell you his middle name now, and then his first name when we get home."

"Sounds… fair, I guess," Steve said with a nod.

"Okay, I know when we first started talking about baby names, I said I didn't want to overuse the cliché of naming our kid after someone we know, a folly our generation did time and time again, but recent events made me think over this differently."

Steve nodded, leaning against the wall. "I never cared whether it was a used name or a borrowed one."

"I know," Bethany said with a chuckle. "Which is why I want his middle name to be Anthony." Steve could see in Bethany's eyes just how much this would mean to her. "I thought about Howard as a name for so long since he did so much for me. But when Tony came after the Triskelion, and did everything to help, I realized he's done more for us as a couple."

Steve nodded again, kissing her forehead. "I agree. Tony and I may get on each other's nerves every once in a while, but I agree. He's done a lot for us, with nothing in return. Something very unlike him in general circumstances."

"I love you," Bethany said suddenly. "I wasn't sure how you'd feel about the middle name. You'll love the first one."

"I have a feeling I know what it is," Steve admitted with a sheepish smile.

"It wouldn't surprise me," Bethany said with a chuckle. "Tonight."

"Tonight," Steve agreed.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom," Bethany began, changing the subject. "I'll meet you back at the table?"

"I thought you needed help peeing in that dress," Steve said with a slight frown.

"I'm actually just going to fix my makeup," Bethany explained. "See you soon?"

"Sure. You look beautiful though," Steve offered as Bethany started to wander away. "And Beth?" He called out, gathering her attention. "I love you too."

Looking in the mirror, she wasn't completely upset with her appearance. Yes, her face was rounder, but that was clearly to be expected. She had taken on a healthy glow, and even though she had some bags under her eyes, it was covered by layers and layers of makeup. She wasn't getting enough sleep. Or any sleep she did get was tainted by everything that ever haunted her. The worst part was that so much of it weren't even things her mind fabricated. So much was real, or could very well be true. Luckily for her, Steve hadn't asked many questions. An occasional "sleep well" every few mornings, but her nightmares obviously weren't the tossing and turning kind.

Reapplying her lip gloss, she decided she needed fresh air. The entire floor was packed with too-rich-couples, all trying to out-do and out-spend the other. The air tasted stale and something she ate, or all of it, wasn't settling well. Finding a door to the back terrace, she quickly took in the air. It was cool, but warm enough for Bethany to be comfortable. No one was out there, and with the looks of the view, she knew why. The back was almost right up against the back of another building, very little light leaking through.

Bethany saw a small bench and moved over to sit down. She closed her eyes, letting the day roll off her shoulders. Her feet were swollen and her back was aching, but somehow she didn't mind. Her fingers played with the diamond bracelet on her wrist, helping in relaxing every muscle in her body. She could faintly hear the party within the building and some honking of horns on the streets, but it was relatively quiet. Peaceful.

She felt at complete ease, ready for the weeks to come. At harmony with the chance that she could go into labor at any moment. That her son could be with them before the night ended. Ready for motherhood, ready for everything that came with the territory. Ready for anything.

But that all changed when she felt a cold hand on her shoulder.

Steve checked the time on his watch again before worry fully kicked in. Bethany had been gone for almost twenty minutes now. Something was wrong.

He picked Tony out of the crowd, quickly moving next to him. "Can I have a word?" Steve asked, interrupting Tony's punchline.

"Can it wait?" Tony gritted.

"No," Steve answered impatiently.

Tony gave a bright smile to his audience before walking away with Steve. "What?"

"Have you seen Bethany?" Steve asked quickly, still searching the room for her.

"No," Tony answered. "But how hard will it be to find her? She's a great big disco ball."

Steve hit Tony's shoulder at his words, earning an 'ow'. "This is serious. I left her twenty minutes ago."

Tony nodded slowly. "I'll check with security. Where was she last?"

"The bathroom," Steve said, taking out his phone and dialing Bethany's number. "Should we call the police?"

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Cap," Tony tried to calm him down. "Let me talk to security. We haven't heard a ruckus or anything, so that's a good thing."

"We both know it's possible to kidnap someone without a ruckus," Steve muttered as Tony went to talk to security. "Come on, Beth. Pick up."

"Hello?" He heard suddenly. But it wasn't Bethany's voice.

"Kiley?" Steve asked, completely taken back. He looked around the room until he spotted the woman across the room. "Why do you have Beth's phone?"

"I needed it to make a call and never got the chance to give it back," Kiley explained.

"And when was that," Steve asked, walking towards her.

"Before the auction," Kiley answered. "Why, what's wrong?"

"I can't find her," Steve said, meeting her in the middle, and ending the call. "She went to the bathroom and now-"

"Calm down Steve," Kiley tried.

"Calm down?" Steve said enraged. "My wife is missing!"

"Shhh!" Kiley insisted. "You don't know that. It's Bethany. Maybe she went out for a walk?"

"She would've told me," Steve responded, a hand instantly going to his wedding band and twisting it around the digit. "I just… I have a bad feeling."

"Okay," Kiley said with an understanding nod. "Let's go ask around. Maybe someone saw her? Talk to security?"

"Tony's doing that," Steve said as they started walking around the room.

"If they come up blank, we'll check cameras," Kiley promised. "We'll find her Steve. She couldn't have gone far."

Steve knew she was right, but he couldn't help but think about who could have her and where she was. If she was in immediate danger, what they wanted and if they could easily get her back. He thought that they were safe. That they had finally achieved a sense of normalcy. But he realized that nothing would ever be normal for them. Because there would always be something in the way of them achieving normal. Whether it was a threat looming on them, or the rest of the world, there would always be something and he felt like a fool to even consider living in this perfect happy state.

"They're checking the security cameras," Tony said, jogging up to him. "But the night has been quiet."

Steve let out a breath of air. "Keep asking around?" He asked Kiley. "I want to watch the footage myself."

"Okay," Tony agreed, gesturing for him to follow. They walked down a long hall and into a crowded room, Steve using his size to make his way to the monitors.

"Anything?" Steve asked, feeling his heartbeat race. The footage was on rewind, each person searching for Bethany. Steve gave a small smile when he saw their last encounter, her body wrapped in the million twinkly sequins. Just watching her, and him, the way they were looking at each other was making him weak. He needed her, safe in his arms and now.

"Monitor twelve," a man suddenly said. Steve turned, looking as the footage was on a constant repeat. There Bethany was, sitting in a dark area calmly. The majority of the footage was cut off, only showing part of her body, but something behind the camera caught Bethany's attention as she slowly turned her head. Her face read fear, but she got up and walked away, behind the camera.

"Where was this?" Steve asked as the footage played again. "When was this?"

"The back terrace near the bathroom," a security guard offered. "About nineteen minutes ago."

"And where did she go?" Tony demanded. "She clearly didn't come back in and she sure as hell couldn't just disappear."

"We don't know sir," A man said solemnly.

"Well find out," Tony stressed. "I'm not paying you to eat donuts and talk women." Steve frantically clenched his fists, watching the footage repeat once more before storming out of there. "Wait! Cap, where are you going?"

"Where do you think I'm going?" Steve demanded, turning to face Tony. "I'm going to find my pregnant wife."

"Steve-" Tony started as the man began to storm away again.

"What?! You expect me to just sit and wait for someone else to bring me news?" Steve didn't wait for an answer as he made his way to the terrace Bethany was last at. He looked around, searching for any evidence of her being there. Of whoever else was there, but he came up with nothing. Sighing, he sat down on the bench, trying to play out where she could have gone. Looking over his shoulder like Bethany had done, he saw a small gate by the end of the terrace. He got up and pushed the gate slightly, it having previously been unhitched. The gate led to a set of stairs which Steve immediately ran down.

"Beth?" He called out, the stairs leading to an alleyway. For New York, it was fairly clean. A huge garbage bin was backed up against the wall, but that was it. Steve walked down the alley slowly, peering his head around, wishing there was some more light so he could search for evidence of Bethany having gone that way. A loose sequin, an imprint of her shoes, anything. Even with his cell phone light, it barely made a difference.

"Steve, just hold on a minute," Tony's voice sounded, foot prints echoing loudly on the stairs.

"I'm not sitting back-" Steve tried as he continued forward.

"I'm not asking you too," Tony replied, catching up to him. "Just… Think straight for a moment. She got up, willingly."

"You saw the footage!" Steve shouted before taking a deep breath and lowering his voice. "She was terrified."

"But this is Bethany we're talking about," Tony stressed. "If something was wrong, she would've done something. Pregnant or not. Have some-"

"Faith," Steve finished, sighing. "You're right."

"Say that again?" Tony asked, a teasing tone making its way into his voice.

"I can't just sit back," Steve said, electing to ignore his previous comment. "Because there's a chance you're wrong. She's the only thing… the only family I have."

"I'm sorry, just let me sit back surrounded by the huge Stark family," Tony said sarcastically. "She's the only family I have too."

"You know what she would say right now?" Steve asked quietly. "That we're family and that we're both being idiots."

"Let's find her and then she can tell us herself," Tony suggested.

A/N: So... kinda a cliffhanger? But I'll be nice! Check out my tumblr page (link in profile) for next week's sneak peek. It'll be posted on Sunday :)

Jo: Everything should be there now! The story updates automatically Sunday at 11 am EST along with the next week's preview.

ACBD: I love that song so much! Plus, I feel like it sums up Bethany and Steve's love really well. I mean, yes it's really complicated. But at the end of the day, the reason they love each other is simple.

I thought not reading Steve fanfictions anymore was going to be a lot harder than it actually was. Updating once a week means every free moment is spent writing. Ironically, Bethany's name almost was Evelyn. That's one of my favorite names, and in the earliest draft, that was her name. I can't remember why I changed it, but I'm glad I did!

SailorRaven34: Soon! I promise! Just hold on a little bit longer! Kiley :) Her name is Kiley. Originally it was Riley, but I changed it. And good! I'm nothing like Bethany, and my sister isn't exactly like Kiley, but their relationship is like ours a lot. That'll be explored even more. Kiley is going to become a very important character, and I cannot wait to start that storyline, but alas. I still have a few more issues to move out of my way before I even think about starting it.

Within the Stars: Haha! There's more! I promise! So much more! It just needs to be written and posted! I'm glad you like the stories and that you think the characters are three-dimensional :) That's my ultimate goal.

FeliciaFelicis: There you are! I know, she always looks amazing. Even in pjs and her hair up, she looks amazing. I'm super happy that these little moments make everything more realistic. I wanted to capture every moment I could, especially since for the next pregnancy, a HUGE storyline will take place and be the center. Of course, if the MCU gives me the tools to do this. I really hope so! Don't worry, Steve will blow his top very, VERY soon. Next chapter!

doolminion: Haha! I'm so far away plot wise from where I update that I completely forgot about that! I'll definitely remember to add that. And sure, she can be Spanish!

Loveless Wings: So close! I promise!

fulloflightandlove: Every Thursday :)

Mistoflees: I'm glad to know you're enjoying it :) And estatic to know that you thought there was humor! I was voted least funny in my family (...because apparently my family voted while I was at work), so I'm glad I'm making SOMEONE chuckle. Also, love to hear that it's running smoothly. That's the ultimate goal for me; making it so that Bethany doesn't seem like she's placed in the story, but has been there all along.