A/N: Good news everybody, the nurse in my town has tested negative for Ebola – say yay for that!

I've also watched the premier of S3 now. Well… a lot happened there, didn't it? Lol Yes, it's going to be a torturous season of will they/won't they, I can see it now. Here's hoping all the angst won't be in vain, eh? I will say it's very interesting to me that the writers have taken the exact opposite approach to me in getting Olicity together. The show has Olicity easily falling into their date and everything going to hell in a hand basket afterwards. I'm doing the reverse. The hell and the hand basket is coming first, for them getting to the actual date part. Once we get there, it's going to be a much smoother ride… even though I have more than a few hiccups planned for them along the way, of course. Otherwise it's a pretty dull story. But yeah, I just found that interesting.

Speaking of interesting and in my never ending quest to equip my little ducklings as useful and intriguing members of society. Here are a few little gems you can slip into conversation with your friends/colleagues which are guaranteed to be a conversation starter:

Cockroaches fart every 15 minutes and continue to release methane for up to 18hrs after their death (seems like cockroaches, just like Dylan Thomas, won't go gentle into that good night)

Smearing a small amount of dog poop on an insect bite will relieve itching and swelling (however it may create some other issues you'll have to deal with, like being a social outcast… but at least you won't be an itchy one)

In the US, there are more than 40 000 toilet related injuries every year (what are you people doing in there? I mean, I know what Felicity was doing, but still…)

Approximately 80% of all paper money in the US has traces of cocaine on it (okay, now the toilet thing is making more sense)

Jellybeans are covered in shellac which is made from bug excretions (nope, doesn't put me off eating them… what does that say about me?)

Okay, now there is no way you won't wow people in your next social setting. You're welcome. :D

Here's the chapter…

CHAPTER THIRTY SIX

Three days later Oliver still had no idea when his purgatory was going to come to an end and communication with Felicity was getting even patchier. The tenuous threads of his sanity were beginning to snap. Not a great situation when Oliver knew his first order of business when he actually saw Felicity again was to reassure her he wasn't crazy anymore. At least he still had the hunt. Chasing down the bad guys on Starling City's streets helped clear his mind, gave him something else to focus on and it was a welcome relief. Even in his sleep dreams of Felicity haunted his subconscious. But with every dream he had of being hold Felicity in his arms again, seeing her smile up at him, Oliver always woke up alone and it was like losing her all over again. It was getting so that he was dreading even going to sleep now. This was his only respite. Oliver ran along the roof tops of the backstreets, trying to get ahead of the latest villain who'd just robbed a convenience store and cracked open the head of the young female clerk behind the counter. They'd intercepted the call on the police scanner and Oliver knew the police weren't going to get there before the guy was long gone. But he could.

"One street over and you should have him." Diggle's voice was in his ear, he was nearby, in the car and monitoring the street cameras to track where their robber was at all times. "I'll cut him off, turn him back round to you."

"Copy that," said Oliver, still running. He leapt agilely between two buildings and rolled to his feet before continuing to run along the roof tops of various businesses and houses. In seconds he was a block over and had his target in his sight. "Got him." Up ahead was the end of the alleyway which would lead to freedom for the robber but Diggle suddenly pulled up in his van, blocking that escape route. The man hastily turned around, running back the way he came and towards Oliver. Stringing an arrow to his bow, Oliver let fly, landing the arrow directly in front of the man. The thief abruptly stopped running and looked up in horror. Oliver had already strung another arrow and this one landed in the man's left shoe, pinning it and him to the ground.

The man gave a screech of pain and grabbed his leg, trying to unstick it.

"Drop the gun," Oliver ordered him, his voice scrambled by the modulator he was wearing.

The terrified man immediately did as he was told.

Oliver looked down at him from the rooftop, aware of the imposing figure he was cutting. "The police are on their way and you're going to stay there and wait for them. I know your face now and if I ever see it again, I'm going to leave you with more than a limp. Do you understand?"

The man gave a frantic nod of his head. "Don't kill me!" he begged. "This has all been a big mistake!"

"The only mistake made was you thinking you could hurt innocent people in my city," growled Oliver. He fired off another arrow and pinned the man's other foot to the ground for good measure. There was already the wail of police sirens filling the air as he turned and ran back along the rooftops.

"I'm two streets over," Diggle told him.

"On my way." Oliver made short work of the distance between them and soon he was standing on a roof looking down at the top of Diggle's latest car sitting in an alleyway. The only thing separating them was one lot which looked like the back lot of a garage. Multiple car bodies were scattered around the lot, all in various states of disrepair. Three large guard dogs had wandered out in the lot and were looking up at Oliver in interest as he got a little too close to their turf for their liking.

Diggle's voice was in his ear again. "The only mistake you made was thinking you could hurt innocent people in my city," he mimicked Oliver's previous statement teasingly. "A bit over the top, don't you think?"

The shortest distance to Diggle was a straight line and that straight line happened to be an eight inch beam of wood running from one side of the lot to the other, over the top of the junk yard. "I'm running around on roofs dressed in green leathers and a hood, firing arrows at people," said Oliver dryly. He stepped out onto the beam, confident of his balancing abilities. "I don't know if that's a thing for me anymore."

Diggle chuckled. "Point taken. Careful on that beam. Those dogs look like they're looking to add some greens to their diet."

Oliver glanced down and saw the three dogs circling directly underneath him, emitting warning growls and never taking their eyes off him. "I've got it," said Oliver easily as he stepped out onto the plank of wood. Two things happened in the next moment. Ones, his cell phone went off and Oliver immediately made a grab for it. Responding to his phone had become like a Pavlovian response thing for him nowadays because there was always the hope that it was Felicity. Consequently, he answered the phone wherever he was, whatever he was doing. The second was that while he was momentarily distracted by retrieving his phone, he stepped on a wet part of the beam, causing his foot to lose its place. Oliver tumbled off the beam and only his quick reflexes saved him as he grabbed at the same beam to stop himself from falling any further. He lost the grip he had on his phone in the lunge to save himself and it tumbled to the ground below as the guard dogs were throwing themselves up into the air frantically to try and get a hold of him. Oliver immediately swung his legs up out of danger and levered himself back onto the ledge.

"Word to the wise, don't try and do two things at once, you're not great at it."

Oliver looked over to where Diggle was now out of the car and standing in the alleyway, looking up through the chain link fence at him as Oliver rebalanced himself on the beam. Oliver could tell he'd given Diggle a moment of worry despite his apparent calmness. "Damn it," he growled, looking down at his phone. "I need to get that back." Felicity could be leaving a message even now. The phone was in the middle of the pack of dogs who were still jumping and snarling viciously up at him.

"Yeah, no, that's not a great idea," cautioned Diggle.

"It doesn't look broken," insisted Oliver.

"That wasn't my issue with you going for the phone," said Diggle wryly. "It was more snappy, bitey and crunchy there."

"Just distract them," said Oliver. "I'll jump down and get the phone."

"There isn't enough distance between me and you for a distraction to work. They'll just turn around and be back on you in seconds as soon as your feet touch the ground."

"Then try and be really distracting," said Oliver stubbornly. He really needed his phone back. Just then one of the dogs noticed the phone and started to sniff at it. Oliver knew his scent must be all over it. "Hey you, leave that alone," he ordered the dog sternly. To which the dog looked up at him and then turned his attention back to the phone, promptly picking it up and then proceeding to crunch it to pieces in his mouth. Oliver's eyes went wide in outrage. "You complete ass face!" he yelled at the dog.

"Okay, I'm calling it," said Diggle as the dog crunched noisily through the phone. "Time of death, 8:03pm. All the king's men and all the king's horses aren't putting that puppy back together."

Oliver gave the dog an angry death glare but knew Diggle was right. The phone was gone. There was nothing to be done about it. He stalked the rest of the way across the beam, fuming. Oliver jumped down on the other side to join the waiting Diggle. "Did you see that?" he asked in outrage. "That was totally deliberate by that dog."

"I guess that's why he's an ass face," said Diggle in wry amusement. "That's a new word for you."

"It's a Felicity word," grumbled Oliver, still really annoyed as he walked around to the passenger's side of the car and climbed in. "She's used it on me before."

"She's never used it on me," replied Diggle as the car dipped under his weight as he too climbed in behind the wheel. "Guess I've never been an ass face."

"I find that highly unlikely," said Oliver flatly. He sent a final glare at the junkyard dogs who were still at the fence, barking madly at them, even as Diggle drove them away. "And speaking of asses, what's this about you owing some kind of favor to a guy named Bunny?"

"How did you get from asses to Bunny?" asked Diggle in consternation as he drove them along the back streets of the Glades.

"I don't know," said Oliver distractedly, still thinking about that missed phone call. "Bunnies have butts… it's kind of a segue way."

"That's a pretty scatter logical connection," said Diggle wryly. "You sound like Felicity."

"Nobody sounds like Felicity except for Felicity," said Oliver a little morosely. He tried not to think about the giant hole her absence was leaving in his life. Oliver turned his attention back to his original question. "So, what's going on with you and this Forbes-Hamilton guy?"

"Nothing. He did me a favor and in return, I'll do him one."

"What kind of favor?" asked Oliver sharply. "I don't like the sound of this."

"I think if it was down to him, he'd want me to sleep with him," said Diggle easily. He gave a little shrug. "I don't blame the guy. I'm adorable."

Diggle said that with such a straight face, Oliver was suddenly a little worried. "You're not serious right now, are you?"

"Completely. I am, to all intents and purposes, beyond adorable."

Oliver rolled his eyes. "I meant the other thing. The sex thing."

Diggle glanced his way and arched an eyebrow. "Are you asking me if I'm intending to prostitute myself out to pay back a favor I owe on your behalf?"

"I guess," said Oliver a little uncertainly.

"How much do you think I like you? Because if you really think that, it's a whole lot less than you're giving me credit for right now."

Oliver gave a grunt at Diggle's teasing. "I just don't like my friends owing things to people like this Forbes-Hamilton guy. Particularly not on my account."

"Forbes-Hamilton isn't exactly what you think he is," said Diggle easily. "I can handle him. Don't give it a second thought. Go back to your obsessing over Felicity."

"I'm not obsessed," said Oliver sharply, ever conscious of even the slightest suggestion that he wasn't fully recovered from the effects of the XR-320. "Who says I'm obsessed?"

"I did, just then. Try and pay better attention."

"I'm just worried about Felicity and her mom," said Oliver tightly. "Which is completely natural and not obsessive at all."

"You wanted to jump down into the middle of a pack of rabid junkyard dogs to get your phone, just on the off chance it was Felicity on the other end of that call."

"No," huffed Oliver, "that wasn't about Felicity. I was waiting on an important call from my… from my… ahh…"

"Could you lie faster?" asked Diggle casually. "I want to make this an early night if I can."

Oliver scowled. "I'm not obsessing about Felicity." Only he was and it was getting worse the longer they were separated.

"So, you're not in love with her anymore?"

"Of course I'm still in love with her," said Oliver irritably. "Love isn't like a rash. It doesn't just clear up over time if you put a bit of ointment on it."

"Sounds like you've got a lot of experiences with rashes," said Diggle in amusement. "But do you mind me giving you some advice on love from my humble experience?"

"I have yet to find a way to stop you with this kind of stuff, so sure, why not?" said Oliver flatly. "Have at it."

"Remember how I said to you a while back a little bit of your love goes a long way?"

"Yes," said Oliver, casting him a wary, sideways look. He didn't like where this was going.

"You're a very intense guy."

Oliver opened his mind to argue the point about that but then thought better of it. "Continue."

"You and Felicity have recently shared a very intense experience and I'm assuming when she comes back, you want to start some kind of ongoing romantic relationship with her."

"Of course I want that, if Felicity does," said Oliver unevenly.

"Can I make a suggestion that you take things slowly with Felicity when she does come back?"

"I was planning on doing that anyways," said Oliver irritably.

"Yes, but your version of slowly and other people's isn't the same thing."

"Yes, it is."

"Alright then, answer me this. What's the longest time you've waited to have sex with a woman once you've decided you want her?"

Uh oh.

"What do you mean?" he hedged, trying to buy time.

"I mean, once you've decided you've wanted a woman in the past, what's the longest time that has gone by between you deciding you want to have sex with them and the actual sex."

Oliver blinked. "I don't know," he said uncomfortably. "Who knows that kind of stuff off the top of their heads?"

"Just try for an educated guess."

Oliver pulled a face. "I don't know… twelve maybe?"

"Twelve what?"

"Ahh…"

"Twelve weeks?"

Oliver pursed his lips and avoided looking at Diggle. "Umm…"

"Twelve days?"

Oliver blew out a long breath, aware of the looks Diggle was giving him as the other man divided his attention between the road and Oliver.

"Twelve hours?" asked Diggle in disbelief. "That's the longest you've held out for sex in a relationship? Twelve hours?" He shook his head. "And yet you're making out like I'm the whore in this relationship."

"Twelve hours isn't that bad," protested Oliver unhappily, even though he knew it was.

"It is when that is the longest you've held out for sex," said Diggle roundly. "And which brings me back around to my point. Don't rush Felicity when she gets back. I know you, you're going to think you're going slowly but it's going to feel like the complete opposite to Felicity. She's not like all your other women, Oliver."

"You think I don't know that?" asked Oliver in frustration. "You don't think I lay awake at night going over all the ways I can screw this up? I want Felicity and me to be different from all my other failed relationships. I want us to last. I need us to last."

"And statements like that last one is going too fast. When you tell someone you need them like that before they're ready to hear it, that feels like pressure to them."

"I'm not going to pressurize Felicity into anything," insisted Oliver. "I want her to enter into a relationship with me of her own free will because she wants to."

"And, if she doesn't want to, what's your back up plan exactly?"

Go quietly insane. "I don't know. I don't have one. All I need is one chance to prove to Felicity I'm sincere."

"And it'll be her decision about whether or not she gives you that chance. I just want us all to be on the same page with that, okay?"

"Why are you saying all this?" asked Oliver tersely. "Do you think Felicity won't want to give me a chance?"

"I think Felicity has always had a soft spot when it comes to you and I don't want you to take advantage of that."

"Why would you think I want to take advantage of Felicity?" asked a mystified Oliver. "That's the last thing I want to do."

"I'm just saying that you can be pretty overwhelming when you fix your mind to a certain course. Try and remember that some of us mere mortals aren't quite as driven as you are. If you can just ease back a little on the intensity pedal, I think everyone is going to be a lot happier."

"You make me sound like a mad man," said Oliver unhappily.

"Take a look at your life, Oliver," said Diggle calmly. "And now answer me this – would a completely sane and rational man live the kind of life you do?"

Oliver glared at him. "You're living the same life too."

"Not exactly."

"Close enough to."

"I'm far enough back from the ledge to get some perspective. Your life is weird, Oliver."

"Too weird for Felicity is what you mean," said Oliver resentfully.

"Not at all. Felicity is one in a million like that. She takes a surprising amount in her stride. All I'm saying is try and remember she's a lot shorter than you are, her strides are not quite as long. You may have to wait for her to catch up." Diggle gave a shrug. "So, just be patient is all."

"I am being patient," said Oliver in frustration. "I haven't seen Felicity in nearly three weeks. How much more patient can I be?"

"The real patience kicks in when you actually see her. This stuff doesn't count."

Oliver's shoulders sagged. That was one hell of a depressing thought.

He was still pondering Diggle's warnings the next day, even as he fossicked around in the forest of files which had become the filing room. Basically Diggle had just added to his nerves about seeing Felicity for the first time again. There were so many things which could go badly between them. It was the not knowing what he was dealing with which was killing Oliver. Diggle was suddenly filling the doorway of file room.

"In thirteen minutes the town car is driving out of the underground car park, with or without you in it," he warned Oliver. "This is a big meeting, a lot of corporate investors and you're not going to be late."

"Why do you care?" asked Oliver in vexation as he picked up and slammed down file after file.

"I'm your driver," said Diggle casually. "Your lateness reflects poorly on me professionally."

Oliver sent him a harried look. "Like you care about that."

"I care that it looks like I can't organize one rich boy to be anywhere on time."

"There are extenuating circumstances when it comes to me and my lateness," said Oliver dismissively.

"You can't hang this one on the Arrow. You're late today because you're late today."

Diggle was right. Oliver had overslept that morning because he'd been having a fantastic dream where he and Felicity were on a date and having the time of their lives. He'd fought like hell to stop himself from waking up from that particular dream because he knew reality was a lot more depressing. "I can't find a contract draft I need for this meeting," said Oliver in agitation, still looking through stacks of papers.

Diggle sighed. "Okay, let me help."

"No," said Oliver sharply. "Don't touch anything. I've got a system going."

Diggle looked at the chaos in the room. "I find that a highly unlikely assertion. Why don't you just print up the contract again? It'd be a lot quicker."

"No, it isn't because I don't know where Felicity's saved it on the server."

"There's a lot of things you don't seem to know about this contract. Are you sure it even exists?"

Diggle earned himself a dark look from Oliver for that last crack.

Oliver's lips tightened. "I know what I'm doing, just go and wait for me in the car."

"Twelve minutes," cautioned Diggle. "I roll out with or without the CEO of Queen Consolidated."

"What's the point of driving an empty car to a meeting?" asked Oliver in exasperation.

"Fresh air and I get to make a point."

Oliver rolled his eyes. "Awesome."

"It's eleven minutes, thirty-eight seconds now."

Oliver made an irritated noise. "Stop that, it's like you're a bomb counting down before exploding."

"Just trying to motivate you."

Oliver grunted. "Yeah, thanks for that."

"Eleven minutes, seventeen seconds now," called back Diggle over his shoulder as he strolled off.

Oliver shook his head and continued his search for the elusive contract. He was relatively sure that Diggle wasn't going to leave without him but he'd prefer not to find out. Oliver just kept searching as the minutes ticked by and he didn't look up as he caught a shadow out of the corner of his eye. "I know, I know, I'm working on it," he said sharply. "Don't start with the stupid countdown again. It really doesn't help, Digg—" Oliver had turned his head to address the other man but the silhouette he saw in the doorway was definitely not that of one John Diggle. This outline was decidedly smaller, and a lot more feminine. Oliver blinked, hardly able to believe his eyes. "Felicity?" His voice cracked over her name and then his throat closed over, making further words seemed like an impossibility as she stepped into the room, drawing closer to him. Felicity's blonde ponytail swayed in time with the feminine swell of her hips and Oliver couldn't take his eyes off of her.

If this was another dream, Oliver was going to scream the place down…

A/N: Man, if it is a dream, how much would you guys hate me? A lot, right? Yeah, that's what I thought. Tune in tomorrow and we'll find out one way or the other… ;)