When Jake woke again it was late in the day. He realized almost instantly that Nessie wasn't by his side and he shot out of bed. He flew out of the room and and stopped in his tracks when he got to the kitchen. She was sitting at the table laughing softly. The second Jake flew into the room she turned to look at him. Seeing the panicked look on his face she got up and rushed over to him. He wrapped his arms around her as soon as she was close enough.
Nessie placed her palm on his face, showing him how he looked asking what was wrong. "I'm sorry Ness. I woke up and you weren't beside me, I got scared." His words were barely a whisper but he knew everyone in the room could hear him except maybe Emily. She hugged him back for a few more moments and then pulled back a little. "Sorry Jake, I got hungry and Emily offered to make me something to eat." She pointed to the table where there were heaps of food. Jake then noticed that Seth and Ryan were both sitting there too. Ryan looked at him sympathetically. Sam was standing by Emily near the counter with his arms around her waist. Jake looked back to Nessie noticing now that the bruises that were so visible this morning were just a shadow now. He gently stroked his thumb over her cheek.
"How's your head?" Nessie gave him a light smile. "Just a dull ache now. Are you hungry, do you want to eat?" Jake kissed her lips softly and then took Nessies hand and walked back to the table with her. He knew everyone had seen his panic but no one said anything about it. He sat in the chair Nessie had been in and pulled her into his lap with him wrapping one arm around her waist while grabbing food and adding it to her plate.
Jake noticed that everyone seemed to be particularly quiet. Never a good sign. He ate part of the food he had grabbed and then looked around the room. "Alright, what's going on?" No one answered him but they all turned their eyes to Nessie. Jake looked at her for an answer. She looked down at the table not wanting to see his eyes. "My dad wants me to come back to the house Jake." Jake started to lightly tremble with the thought of her leaving his side. "No, you're staying with me, you're not leaving my side." Jakes eyes had grown dark and his voice was serious.
"I have to see him Jake. He's my father, he's been worried sick about me. You can't tell me I can't go." Jake was trembling harder now. "Ness, maybe you should move." Ryan said it quietly but as soon as he did Jake glared at him and tightened his grip around her waist. Little did they know she was the only thing keeping him from losing it. "I'm not going to hurt her." Jake growled at him and Sam stepped a little closer in case he needed to intervene. Jake turned back to Nessie. "Ness, I can't let you go, I just….."
Nessie stopped him by putting her hand to his cheek again. She showed him the fight she had with her dad right before she ran off. She told him with her gift that she knew how sorry he would be and that he would be worried sick until he saw her. She didn't want to take a chance of him breaking the treaty to see her. Jake let out a deep breathe. "I don't plan to stay there yet Jake, I just need to see him." Jake almost seemed a little relieved when she said that. He lifted her chin so she would meet his eyes. "Only if I go with you, I'm not letting you go alone." "I wouldn't be alone Jake, Ryan would be there." "I'm going with you, or you're not going at all." Nessie went to stand off his lap and he allowed her to but he refused to let go of her hand. "You have no right to tell me that I can't go." You could hear the anger in her voice. "Jake….." Jake cut Ryan off. "This is none of your business, stay out of it." Jake was trembling hard and he gripped Nessies hand a little tighter. He started to walk toward the bedroom where they had slept taking her with him. Jake could hear Ryan asking Seth and Sam if it was safe for him to be alone with Nessie and although it pissed him off more he wanted to talk to her alone. He knew he wouldn't hurt her. He closed the door behind them.
He was fighting the internal conflict going on inside his head. The wolf in him wanted to pin her against the wall and kiss her into submission but Jake knew that's not what she needed right now and he couldn't do that to her. He turned and punched the wall with his free hand. Her eyes were wide with shock. He still had her hand in his. She tried to yank her hand from his but he just tightened his grip on it. He knew he should let her go but he couldn't She looked at him and she could see the pain and worry behind the anger. "Jake…" Her voice was soft and quiet. He looked into her eyes noticing now that her body was slightly trembling too. He wanted to pull her against his body but he knew if he did he wouldn't be able to keep from kissing her.
He used all of the control he could gather and slowly let go of her hand. He turned away from her but she grabbed him and spun him around. Without realizing what he was doing he suddenly had her against the wall. When he realized what he had done he couldn't move away but he let her wrists fall and placed his hands on the wall beside her. She could have easily scooted away if she wanted to. He let out a deep breathe.
He tried to keep his voice quiet but it came out a little more pained and husky then he wanted. "Ness, I can't let you go without me. It wouldn't matter if you were going to the store right now, I just can't let you out of my site. I will literally go nuts if I'm not with right now. Please, don't fight me on this. I will let you see your father, but you have to let me go with you." Nessie could feel his confliction even though she wasn't sure exactly what it was over. She had an idea though. She brushed her thumb over his lips and his cheek. "Jake, look at me, please." Jake slowly opened his eyes. He expected to see fear in her eyes but there was only the slightest hint of it.
Nessie stared at him for a few moments. She saw the anger and the pain he felt, then she saw what he was feeling so conflicted about. She saw the possessiveness in his eyes with the hint of desire. She brushed her lips against his so softly she barely touched them. She felt a shudder run through his body and his hands fisted against the wall. He closed his eyes "Ness, don't." His voice was husky and almost dangerous. "Why not?" Her words were barely audible. Jake couldn't stop the low growl that came from his throat. It was more from the frustration he felt then anything.
Just then there was a knock on the door and it opened before either of them could answer. Jake was half thankful and half pissed at the intrusion. Seth stepped into the room and saw how Jake was standing in front of Nessie with his hands in fists on the wall. "Everything ok?" Seth knew that Jake would never hurt her but he had to ask. His voice was nervous. He didn't want to piss Jake off anymore then he was. "Fine." Jake said through gritted teeth. "Yes Seth, everything is fine." Nessie said softly. Jake tore himself away from the wall slowly and put a few inches between him and Nessie. Jake was still trembling.
"Jake...are you sure..." "I'm fine Seth." Jake said it harshly and he was still clenching his fists. "Tell Ryan to go ahead of us and tell Bella to put her damn sheild up unless she wants a fight on her hands." Seth had an idea as to why Jake said that, but he just nodded. He had seen in the minds of some of the wolves how great the need was to sometimes dominate their mates. He didn't totally understand yet himself but he knew better than to argue when one of them was in this mood Jake seemed to be in. Seth nodded at Jake and then glanced at Nessie giving her a soft smile before heading back out the door. He didn't bother to close it.
Nessie moved away from the wall and lightly touched Jakes arm. He turned to face her but he didn't touch her. "Do you want to clean up before we go?" He tried to keep his voice even. He hoped she would so he could collect himself. She nodded. "Okay." She said softly and then walked over to where Ryan had left the bag he brought her. She pulled out a pair of sweats and a tank top. Jake watched her as she walked out of the room toward the bathroom. He threw himself backward on the bed and ran his hands over his face. He deliberately took deep breathes to try and calm his body. He didn't understand why he felt so much more possesive of her than before. The whole reason he had left the kitchen was to keep himself from attacking Ryan and throwing him out. He knew that wouldn't help Nessie at all. She needed him and Jake understood why, but now it seemed the wolf in him didn't want to care about that.
Jake heard someone walk in the room and moved his hands to see Sam leaning against the wall. "Not now Sam." His voice was frustrated and annoyed. "Jake, I saw the look in your eyes. I know what your feeling." "Believe me Sam, you have no idea. This isn't just about me losing my temper." "Like I said, I know what you're feeling and you need to tread carefully with how you choose to react...or not react." "Don't you think I know that Sam? God, if Seth hadn't have walked in when he did...I would never have hurt her, you know that... but god, what I wanted to do to her...I would have never forgiven myself after what shes been through." "Jake, I meant it when I said I know the feeling you felt. It's part of the wolf in us, and it's very strong. And of course you're right about being careful after what she's been through, but from what Seth said, she didn't seem frightened by the way you reacted." "That doesn't make it right Sam." "I understand your confliction in this Jake, but you should know, the longer you push back what you're feeling instead of acting on it, the worse it's going to be for you. It will drive you to the point of breaking Jake. You will lose control if that happens, and it won't matter who is around you at the time."
Jake looked at Sam now both with shock and understanding. Sam hadn't been a wolf very long when he met Emily and imprinted on her. He hadn't learned everything he now knew and she had been injured when he lost his control The whole side of her face was scarred.. Jake never knew why he had lost it back then. "What am I supposed to do Sam?" Jakes voice was quiet now. "You have to let it happen Jake. That's the only thing you can do." "But what if..." Sam already knew what he was thinking. "Then you'll stop, because you love her and you would never hurt her that way." Jake wasn't so sure about that with how strong the feeling was he felt. He wanted to trust Sam but he didn't know if he could trust himself. "Thanks Sam. For everything." Sam nodded and then walked out of the room.
Jake took a few more deep breathes and then got up and went to the kitchen. Emily was the only one there. She gave Jake a sympathetic look. "You should listen to Sam Jake. He knows what he's talking about. He would never lead you in the wrong direction with something like this." She walked over and hugged him. "Thanks, Em. Sorry about all of this." Jake said it quietly. She backed away and leaned back against the counter. "Don't worry about it Jake. Even though you and Sam had have your own packs now, I still consider you all part of my family. I will always take care of my boys." Jake gave her the best smile he could manage at the moment.
Nessie walked into the kitchen then. She looked even sexier somehow in her sweats and tank. Her hair was pulled back with just a few strands that fell to the sides. Jake again pushed back the reaction he felt. He held out his hand to her "Are you ready?" He kept his voice as even as he could. She took his hand as she nodded and waved to Emily as they went out the door. "Do you want to ride or run?" Jake asked her. She thought about that for a moment. "Ride I think." Jake walked her over to where his bike was parked. He picked up the helmet and handed it to her. She gave him an annoyed look. "Now is not the time to argue with me Ness." Jake didn't mean it to come out the way it did, but Nessie heard the dangerous tone like what she had seen in his eyes. Oddly enough it didn't frighten her. She could sense his worry and concern. She took the helmet with an exasperated sigh and put it on. He offered her his jacket and she took that too because it was a little chilly outside. He lifted her carefully onto the bike and then climbed on himself. After he started it she wrapped her arms around him as tight as she could and snuggled against his back. That seemed to calm the wolf in him ever so slightly, but he knew it wouldn't last long. They were going to see Edward after all.