More Fourtris for everyone! ;-)

Chapter 36: Thursday, 2 days until initiation

Tris

I wake up in Tobias' embrace. His arms are slung around me from behind, and he's holding me close to his chest. I love the intimacy of this position, the safety I feel in his arms although I can't look at him. I don't need to. I snuggle closer to him with a sigh, and that's when I feel it. It's unmistakable that he likes this position, too, even when he's asleep.

Is this the next time we referred to yesterday? I know he came home late from work and I have to go to fear landscape training this morning, but with so little time left until initiation, I should just try. I'm nervous and curious and excited all at the same time as I slowly turn myself around, place my hand on his naked chest and move it downwards with gentle pressure.

Tobias slowly wakes up. "Tris, what are you doing?" he mumbles, not even opening his eyes yet.

"Giving you a good start into the day," I say as my palm reaches his briefs.

I cover his hard length with it and love the expression on his face when his sleepy mind realizes what I'm doing. His eyes pop open in surprise.

"Tris."

For a moment, I think he'll stop me. His eyes stare into mine. But I don't want to stop. I take advantage of him still being half asleep and start rubbing my palm over him. I try not to be too gentle cause I want him to know I'm serious about giving him pleasure, and neither do I turn away from his gaze.

We're still keeping eye-contact as I slip my hand under the fabric, and the fact that he's watching me makes my heart beat even faster. I love seeing his reactions as I stroke over him with my fingers first, then with my palm. His skin is so soft there. I wrap my hand around him and slowly start moving it up and down, and that's when he lets out a heavy sigh and his eyes flutter shut again.

I continue, but it's a little difficult to move my hand in his underwear. I'll have to take it off. I withdraw my hand and roll Tobias onto his back. He tries to pull me on top of him, but I resist.

"No, you're not the one in charge right now," I mumble as I place kisses over his heart and down his chest and abdomen, and he lets out a defeated groan.

I kiss down to the waistband of his briefs, and for a second Christina's question plops up in my mind: With your hands or your mouth?

Well, for today I'm sure what I want to do. One step after the other.

I hook my thumbs under the fabric and pull it down along his legs. That keeps me distracted for a moment until I look up again and see him naked in all his glory. Am I allowed to look at him or is that something people don't do?

Then I notice Tobias has raised his head from the cushion and looks at me. And at this moment, I see how nervous he is, too. I move from where I'm kneeling beside his hips to lying next to him on my side. I place my hand on his cheek and kiss him. It's a gentle kiss, one to reassure both of us that this is what we want.

And then I trail my hand back downwards while my lips never lose contact with his. It's easier to hold him and work my hand up and down his length now that he's naked.

Tobias breathes heavily into my mouth while we kiss, and every time he lets out a groan, I'm sure I've done something that feels good for him. It's easy now that I've started, his obvious lust feeding my own desire, and soon I'm moaning along with him.

I sling a leg over his as he pulls me close to his side with a firm grip on my waist. With him holding me so tightly, I intensify my own grip around him and go faster.

"Oh, that's so good Tris," Tobias sighs as he starts moving his hips up and down in the rhythm of my strokes.

It doesn't take long until I feel him start to tense, and I remember what that means from the time I watched him pleasure himself. He's close. I can't help but look at his handsome face to see how much he enjoys this. It's not a question, and it's unbelievably hot that I'm doing this to him.

The rush of power when he finally starts to fall apart heats up my whole body inside out; to know that I can make this strong man turn so weak in my arms. Maybe I have to take the lead more often.

He's still panting after the tension has left his body and I place my hand on his abdomen to wait for him to calm down.

"Wow Tris, that was amazing," he says and turns towards me to kiss my forehead.

"It was," I grin. I don't doubt that in the slightest.

"I'll go and clean myself up. I'll be back in a minute," he whispers against my skin before he gets up. "I'll bring you some paper, too," he adds with a look at my hand.

Minutes later, we're cuddling under the sheets. I lie on my back and Tobias lies next to me with his head placed on my chest. Usually he holds me in his arms like this, but today it's the other way round. I hope he feels as safe and loved as I always do when I snuggle up against his side.

Neither of us has the need to talk about our new experience. It's not necessary. It's obvious that we both enjoyed it.

I keep drawing circles on Tobias' back with my fingertips until he's dozed off again. I love when he falls asleep in my arms. It's such a proof of his trust in me. I kiss his temple and carefully pull up the blanket a little more to prevent us from getting cold, and then I close my own eyes for another nap.

Tobias

I sink back into the cushions after Tris left for training. There's still plenty of time for me to sleep and relax, and behind my closed eyes I replay this mornings' activities.

I'll never forget how heavenly Tris' hand felt around me, and how turned on she seemed to be by pleasuring me, too. It made it easy for me to stop worrying and just give myself to her. Now I can't wait until she lets me return the favor.

It's almost twelve when I make it out of the bed and into the shower. I want to go down to meet the others in the cafeteria for lunch, which will actually be my breakfast.

When I enter the place, I see Eric standing by the initiate's table. What's he doing there? I look around for Lauren, but I can't see her.

Stepping closer, I listen to the rest of Eric's little speech about Dauntless values and initiation. Apparently, he's giving instructions on how the exams will be held and judged on Saturday.

I swallow. Saturday - the day after tomorrow.

"Ah, and here comes your favorite instructor. He can answer all the stupid questions you might still have that I don't bother to answer," he smirks, slamming his hand on my back.

I have to resist the urge to fight Eric and throw him down onto the floor. Instead, I look at Tris, and that's what helps to keep my temper from rising.

"Sure, whatever questions you have. It's my job to answer them, and since you have another training session with me tomorrow, you'll be able to ask them all."

The initiate's faces relax a bit now that I'm here, and it's a strange thing to notice. Usually, I'm intimidating them. Perhaps I'm not that frightening in comparison to Eric. At least, though I'm strict and demanding during training, I'm fair.

"You've heard him, keep your questions for tomorrow," Eric smirks and then adds in a silent voice, so the others can't hear, "I'm waiting for you to report on yesterday's task after lunch."

"Sure."

And with that, he walks off.

I decide to help myself to food and then come back and sit with my initiates. I don't often sit with them, but today I just want to be near Tris and listen to her talking to her friends.

I ask about the fear landscape training this morning after I took the seat opposite Tris, next to Will, as the conversation seems to have died down with my presence. Christina starts babbling about hers, and then Uriah follows. But in fact, I'm interested to hear about Tris'.

She seems to notice, so the next time Uriah takes a break to take a bite of his hamburger, she tells me that hers was scheduled to the afternoon, as they were too many to finish in the morning with just one instructor.

It's not what I was hoping for. I wish she had already gone through her fears today, so that we'd both know whether her fear of intimacy still shows up or not. Maybe it's gone. She's taken two big steps with me since her last sim, and I long with all my heart for that to be enough.

I know she feels the same way, I see it in her eyes. Since I can't take her hand in public, I carefully shift my left leg a bit, so my knee is touching hers. She looks up at me in surprise and quickly covers the smile that lightens up her face.

I wish we'd have some time alone today.

But unfortunately, our different schedules force us to go separate ways after lunch. I can only wish her good luck for her landscape, like I do with the other initiates to keep the cover, and then I have to go to Eric.

But he's not in his office, and this time, the door is locked. Shit, now I have to wait for him. I sit down in a metal chair in the hall and time slows down.

When Eric finally turns up, I'm sure at least an hour has passed in which I was caught in my own thoughts about Tris and me, initiation and the looming attack.

"Four! You're waiting for me? Oh, I must have forgotten about you while I was busy talking about Initiation Day with Max."

He smirks, and he sounds everything but sorry.

'Fuck you, Eric,' I think, convinced that he kept me waiting on purpose.

"Now you're here," I say and get up from my chair to face this man that has become my enemy right in the beginning of our own initiation.

I have to fight the urge to thrash him against the wall and hit him right into his pierced face, and at the same moment I hate myself for letting him provoke me to violence. I don't want to be violent, I'm not like him.

Taking deep breaths I stare into Eric's cruel eyes. He's waiting for me to step out of line, I'm sure, but I won't do him the favor. When he realizes that I have myself under control, his expression turns bored, and he leads us both into his office.

Beside some organizational stuff about Saturday, he tells me that Lauren is going to offer peace serum to the initiates tonight at her meeting to those who want to take it, just instead of telling what the substance really is, she's supposed to say it's some calming medicine from the infirmary.

I want to argue with him that this is not what I agreed upon with Johanna, but he dismisses my attempts with a wave of his hand before he orders me to repair some old computer parts in an unused room close to his office.

I suppose they're still trying to gather as much computing power as they can for the attack simulation. That's why I'm not exactly in a hurry to get everything done, and by the time Eric dismisses me because he wants to go home himself, I have done just enough not to raise suspicions, but nothing more. I could easily have fixed twice the amount of computer parts in this time.

DISCLAIMER: I own neither the Divergent world nor the characters, they belong to Veronica Roth.