More Demons Than Angels
The Berserker didn't fade away for some time, but unlike the other instances Eclipse's other half decided to appear, she didn't feel overly active—or at least have the need take out her wrath on the nearest victim. The Berserker seethed quietly in her mobile suit while her other teammates made the appropriate preparations. Nicol was kind enough to check up on her an hour earlier, but Eclipse just kept her head down and hands clenched on the helmet in her lap. He left after a few moments, offering some healthy advice; however, the Berserker didn't catch any of it. Instead of trying to extinguish the anger, Eclipse embraced it. No, when she met that boy in battle, she was determined to stay pissed.
And Namarra's note didn't help matters.
At first, Eclipse felt a bit relieved to hear from her fellow genetic reject—skipping down to the name first let her know—until she actually read the contents. "Pride killed Gluttony," was all it said, the words screaming inside the Berserker's head each time she read it. She was definitely too angry to feel anything but pure hatred, and remembering her experience in Orb only made the bulk of everything so much worse.
In the next battle she wasn't going to play nice.
Athrun had conveniently been in meetings ever since they got back to the submarine carrier. As the team's commander, he was expected to check up on his comrades—especially since everyone was so worried about Eclipse's behavior—but apparently nothing could pull him away. That was suspicious. At one point, Yzak mocked him for being scared, but, then again, he had never bothered to check up on her either. Dearka had tried calling her down from the hanger floor, but Nicol had been the only one to confront her directly.
"Athrun, please," the musician pleaded, catching the young commander as he stepped out for a break. "She hasn't said anything since we came back and you so unprofessionally refused to question her on her conduct back in Orb. Obviously, there's something going on neither of you are telling us."
"You think I didn't question her because I'm hiding something?" the boy snapped, exhaustion in his voice outweighing the abrupt anger. Perhaps Athrun was just getting tired. After all, he knew Eclipse had caught on and it was only a matter of time before the others did too.
Nicol sighed. "I can't say I'm not accusing you, but something's wrong. I don't have to remind you of the coming battle, so why the hell are we all arguing like this?"
"There's a lot involved."
"And you know I'm a very patient person."
Defeated, Athrun sighed a started walking to the hanger. "I-it's just that I've been in something for so long, I never realized what it did to other people."
"But…" the musician egged, feeling as if there was some kind of catch. He hadn't expected the commander to go into a lot of detail on the matter—he never opened up that much—but he knew he'd get information of some kind.
"I'm beginning to think it's not worth it that much anymore. After seeing Eclipse—realizing how far she was willing to go, I don't think I have the right anymore."
"Right for what?" Nicol asked, but never got an answer. By that time, they had reached the hanger and the loud bickering echoing from the inside. So loud, in fact, it was easy to determine who they were.
"Just ask Athrun to talk to her!" Dearka yelled, swinging his right arm out wide. "She won't listen to us so—"
"We don't need to bring that rule-based, Aegis-finger-up-the-ass commander into this. Damn it, Dearka, every time something goes wrong, you whine to him. Try wagging your tail at someone else for a change!" Yzak countered as he braced his hands on his hips. Such a defiant little couple. "What does he got that I—"
"Why does everything have to come down to dick size with you?" the blonde cut in. "Something is bothering Eclipse and all you want to do is bring out the yard stick!"
"What was that?"
Nicol and Athrun just stood in awe, knowing Dearka just breeched the "no trespassing" zone when it came down to Yzak's pride. Everyone thought it, but no one ever said it.
It seemed the blonde would be the one winning the sizing contest.
"Stop sounding like you're some pussyfooted baby who just had his bottle taken away. Man up and ask him for—" Dearka stopped, swinging his left arm towards the hanger entrance and seeing the other two redcoats standing there. "Uh—shit," he cursed.
"What?" Yzak—still furious—turned to the door as well, offering up a string of his own profanities once he saw the last two members of his contest standing there. After all of that he could never show his—uh—face in the locker room showers again.
A short, awkward silence passed between them until Nicol cleared his throat and smiled. "Does this mean I win the pot?"
As if to answer his question, a wrench flew out of the Stealth's open cockpit, landing just behind Yzak. If he hadn't have stepped forward to try and retaliate, that tool would have been wedged in his skull. Given the past conversation, it probably would've done him some good.
"Hey!" the Duel pilot yelled.
"Stop talking about me as if I'm going to judge your damn contest. Haven't you ever learned to leave a girl alone when she's pissed?" Eclipse responded, her voice echoing from the cockpit. "You're lucky that wasn't a nine millimeter, jackass."
There was a bit more shouting and bickering as Athrun walked over to the machine, glad the others kept her occupied. Perhaps she wouldn't hear him coming, then again she was always terribly observant. Oh well, maybe his optimism would actually keep him safe this time.
"Calm down already!" Dearka yelled from the floor just as the lift reached the cockpit. There was no response from the Berserker inside and Athrun peered in.
Gun.
Cursing, the commander dropped flat onto the lift before the bullet could catch him in the chest. That would've been one for the record books: young redcoat killed by PMS comrade. However, nothing happened. Perhaps she finally realized her actions were going to have severe consequences. That was a good sign at least. "Y'know, everyone's worried about you," Athrun began, slowly getting to his feet. Straightening his uniform, he lifted his head to peer inside. "They're not really sure why you're acting like… this." The last few words dribbled out of his mouth as he looked up and down the end of the barrel. He followed the line of the gun to her face, resting on the pupiless eyes and withholding a shiver. She's still that way, I see.
"But you know why I'm mad right?"
He sighed. "Eclipse—"
"He was right there, Athrun. Right there!"
"We were in neutral territory. Killing him would've—"
"So, you admit to knowing him? Knowing he was the Strike pilot?" The commander didn't answer, and said a silent thank you for having the rest of his teammates out of hearing range. "Is that your so-called friend? The one who castrates you every battle?"
"Hey—"
"He killed Waltfeld, Aisha—"
"And how many people have you killed? Being a murderer in a war shouldn't condemn a man to death."
"Listen to yourself!" Eclipse screamed, swinging her gun arm out wide. It luckily missed everything in the cockpit. The last thing they needed was an accidental firing, especially with her bridging on the edge corporal punishment. "I should be burned alive for what I've done!"
"I'm willing to—"
"Just wait," she cut in. "Wait until he kills someone close to you and then tell me how forgiving you'll feel! Do you think he cares? Do you think he'll stop just because that person he's about to kill is your friend?"
Athrun had no response, hell, the redhead didn't even have enough energy to continue her argument. Namarra's message had made it very clear how miniscule the feeling of "friendship" was in a war. FS and Stray were on the same side and still FS felt the need to kill off his friend. How then could a relationship between opposing armies hope to survive? "I-I want to believe it can happen," Eclipse began, tears thickening her voice. She wasn't sure when the Berserker left, but she knew it was gone then, filling that void with anguish instead of rage. It should've been a comforting transition, but the redhead actually cursed it, liking the numb feeling she had had for the past few hours. Perhaps Namarra had been right and the Berserker was like a drug. If that was the case, she was losing the battle already. "B-but the world isn't that kind," she finished.
"I know it's not," Athrun admitted after a few moments, turning to sit on the edge of the cockpit opening. "But can't we try to believe in it?"
"Pride killed Gluttony."
"What?"
"One of my friends just killed the other one." The words caught in her throat, but she just swallowed. This guy had gotten way too many tears from her already. "I just need you to understand things don't always turn out—"
"Hey," he stopped her, reaching under her downed head to put a finger on her lips. "Enough of this; go get some rest."
She didn't say anything, didn't even nod. Her face bolted up at his little gesture, exposing her moistened eyes and very apparent shock.
Hopefully, he didn't see her blush too.
Athrun caught a glimpse of the screen as she climbed out, reading the message and the name "Bob" typed below. So, she hadn't found the information herself. Is this a trusted associate perhaps? His first reaction was a sense of betrayal. Why didn't he know about this person? However, he felt guilty when he saw her stumble onto the lift. The news had to have hit her hard if she was that uncoordinated.
He would just bring it up later.
"I'm glad to see you look a bit better," Nicol commented, plopping down next to Eclipse. They were sitting on the outside deck, waiting for the submarine carrier to be refueled and supplied. It was one of the precautions Athrun had made and, frankly, it was a good idea. They had no idea when the Archangel was going to leave port and if they were unprepared when it did decide to leave—well—everything they had done before would've been pointless. After all the things that had happened in Orb, Eclipse really didn't want to lose her chance at the Strike.
Damn, she was starting to sound like Yzak.
"Or, aren't you feeling any better?" Nicol pressed, hearing no immediate response. She looked fine to him, but no matter how observant he was around the others, girls were just harder to understand. He knew it was just a cliché excuse to give up, but something had happened at Morgenroete two days earlier that had really upset her. Outright asking her about it may put her in a defensive mood and he'd never get through to her at all, so he figured he'd let her talk in her own time. "I guess it's okay if you ignore me," he said after a few more moments of awkward silence. "Do you mind if I sit here though?" At least he got something out of her that time. The redhead shook her head and rested her chin back on her knees, tightening her arms around her shins as she stared out at the water.
Nicol smiled lightly and followed her gaze, sinking into his own thoughts as the waves splashed up against the side of the ship. It seemed like such a long time ago since this damn war had started and yet they had gotten nowhere. Their team was assigned one thing, bring down the 'Legged Ship' and they hadn't even accomplished that. Hell, they hadn't even come close. Given their number of mobile suits and the ones on that ship, their amount of notches in the losing column should've been down to at least one. It was all so pathetic. "What are we doing wrong?" he asked himself.
"Nothing," Eclipse replied, hearing the quiet muttering, "there's just more demons than angels in this world."
"That's a funny thing to say," Nicol responded. "Are you implying that we're the demons? Or the angels?"
"Perhaps we're both, drifting back and forth from heaven and hell depending on the situation," the redhead explained, sounding exhausted as she talked. "I must be in the middle right now because I feel very human at the moment." She buried her face in the nook between her knees after the statement. The musician would've said she was crying, but that didn't seem to be the case. She was stronger than that, he knew, and her stance alone proved that. Human, yes, she was human. Sitting in a fetal position only proved her point, but it wasn't necessarily a bad thing.
"Every once and a while, I think it's okay to feel mortal. It means you can look forward to being an angel, and you know you have the power to overcome your demonic side. Besides," he added, feeling a bit foolish in his train of thought, but seeming to have some point behind it, "I think being human gives you more choices and the chance to learn from the bad decisions, right?"
Bad decisions? Eclipse asked herself. Huh, like not having friends on the opposite— She stopped, for the first time realizing something she should've noticed a long time ago, but thanks to her "high and mighty" act, she had blinded herself to it.
Athrun and herself were in the exact same predicament.
It was so ironic and absurd that she started laughing, startling Nicol next to her and putting a confused look on his fair face. It was all so ridiculous. Eclipse had been yelling at Athrun to just kill his friend and stop messing around, when she should've been doing the exact same thing. She should've killed FS when she had the chance and then Stray would've been alive. After all, wasn't one just following the other? If FS was out of the picture, Stray may've been alive, but since she was so convinced she could save them both, one of them died.
And FS was the one who was insane.
"Ridiculous!" she laughed, falling backwards onto the deck and placing an arm over her eyes. "It's all so stupid!"
Nicol said nothing, just watched her escapade and smiled. He didn't know what was going on, but he had believed the laughter was genuine. As long as she was back to her old self, he really didn't care. He was so oblivious it was frightening, but still comforting at the same time. The musician only pried when he needed to and just accepted everything else. Now there was a friend. "H-hey, look!" he shouted, pulling her own of her laughing fit to look out at the water. Jumping from the surface was a school of flying fish, their blue fins and scales reflecting the sunlight for a few seconds before they dove back into the water. More jumped from the water a second later, looking like a circus trying to entertain its audience. "I'll get Athrun," he announced, jumping to his feet and heading over to the other side of the ship. Eclipse hadn't even known the young commander was so close. Perhaps she should go apologize, but stopped herself. Yes, she might've been able to save Stray if she had killed FS sooner, but none of that mattered anymore. She just wanted FS dead and just as much as that Strike pilot. No, she'd keep pushing Athrun. If his friend was anything like FS—if only in circumstance—he could kill someone close to them. Better to get him before that happened.
Right?
Shaking her head, she just let the matter go, deciding to watch the fish herself when neither of the guys came back. It had been a while since the Berserker was seething in the cockpit. She was sure the next battle was going to be a bloody one, but now she was just exhausted and waiting for the Archangel to come out of Orb wasn't helping matters. Her anger was gone. Not completely, but was definitely depleted enough to make her more melancholy than pissed. Eventually, when the battle would come up, she was sure she'd be able to get that anger back, but she couldn't help thinking, was it all worth it? "Don't do that right now," she hissed. "The second you give up, is the second someone dies."
"Eclipse—hey!" Nicol called. "Come join us!" Eclipse rolled over and sighed, not having the heart to deny the request. She had to get her head back on straight and the best way to do that, was to remind herself who she was trying to protect. Losing Stray had opened her eyes to one thing: she didn't want to lose anyone else.
"A ship is separating from the enemy fleet!" the intercom blared. They were all waiting in their mobile suits, for this kind of report, but there was still no guarantee it was the Archangel. Both Athrun and Eclipse knew that ship was in Orb, but only Nicol seemed to believe them. Dearka and Yzak had their doubts, but no matter what those hesitations were, as soon as they heard the announcement, they were just as anxious. "Identifying…the 'Legged Ship!'"
Eclipse smirked, Yzak said something unintelligent, and Dearka whistled. "Hah! I knew you were right, Athrun," Nicol remarked, proud of his young friend. In fact, he was silently laughing at the other two who had their doubts.
"We're taking off! That ship goes down today!" Athrun announced, heaving a sigh of relief. While he wasn't necessarily worried, he was still a bit uneasy. If something had gone wrong—even if he was sure it wouldn't—not only would neither Yzak nor Dearka let him live it down, but Commander Creuset would have a few things to say as well.
And those wouldn't have been comforting either.
The Aegis launched first, followed immediately by the remaining four suits. They had discussed a plan of attack, but it didn't involve more than take out the Strike first, and then go for the remaining pests and the Archangel. It was a simple plan, but given their past battles, it had to work. The real pain in the ass was the Strike and as soon as that was destroyed, the others should be pretty easy to pick off.
Well, ideally.
They had barely gotten into the air and had view of the Archangel when the ship let loose a smoke screen, covering the ship and the Strike upon the deck in a matter of seconds. The redhead cursed when she saw the display while her teammates did the same. "A smoke screen?" Dearka muttered, shaking his head.
"They're getting' cute with us," Yzak commented a second later. The others could only agree. While it may have seemed like a good tactic from the Earth Forces point of view, it just looked cowardly from ZAFT's side. Given the victory column, the Archangel shouldn't have had to worry about such tactics, seeing as they had been winning most of their battles. If anything, the redcoats should've been given a handicap. Not like they would've taken it in the first place, but common courtesy should've kicked in by that point.
The enemy ship launched two Skygraspers soon after, their movement showing up on the sensors. "I thought there was only one of those things. Now there's two of them?" Yzak said, but no one had a good come back. Hell, they didn't even have time to speak. The second the planes launched, a large plasma blast shot through the fog and nearly hit the clumped ZAFT soldiers.
"Everyone scatter!" Athrun shouted once the shot dissipated, knowing they'd be at a great disadvantage if they remained so tightly together. Given their state as friends, the closeness was a bit unusual, especially with the Duel hovering next to the Aegis. Battles were amazing on all spectrums apparently.
Yzak and Dearka hooked off to the left, hoping to have a shot at the ship from that angle. Athrun and Nicol did the same to the right while Eclipse ascended, figuring she'd get the small flies buzzing about the air. As she anticipated, the Strike attacked the Duel and Buster first and when one of the Skygraspers went to help, she cut it off with a downwards chop from the blade mounted to her left arm. The plane dodged at the last second and soared upward, narrowly missing the second attack from her right arm when she pulled it across her body. "Not bad for an insect," she remarked, folding the blades back under her arms. It looked as if she had to use other methods to take that bug down. The redhead figured the maneuver had more to do with luck than actual skill, but she was willing to give the pilot a break. Besides, underestimating her enemy would put her at a huge disadvantage.
The plane swung back around and fired a few rounds of bullets. The attack merely glanced off her left buckler, the bullets and their shells ricocheting down into the water to land harmlessly on the ocean floor. It was more of a nuisance than anything and when the Skygrasper flew past, she swung the Stealth around to issue her own spew of gunfire. The bullets spat out of the Stealth's mouth with an embarrassing display of fervor. Eclipse could just hear the mechanics words echoing through her head and hated herself for being so susceptible to such mockery. The attack clipped the plane's outer armor near the tail, but—like the Stealth—the bullets did no major damage. Smirking, the redhead just shook her head. What good was excellent aim if the weaponry wasn't powerful enough to harm the enemy?
The Skygrasper flew off then, leaving the Stealth and the buzzing of her rear sensors behind. The Archangel had appeared through the smoke screen and started its attack, firing its rear missiles at the seemingly defenseless redhead. Cursing, Eclipse cut her boosters and fell below the attack, reaching behind her back to grab the beam rifle and shoot down as many of the pesky missiles as she could. She managed to get four of the eight fired before the Skygrasper swung in low for another attack. Aiming its beam cannon, the plane calculated her descent and shot, hoping to destroy the Stealth before it even hit the water.
"You're all just too damn optimistic," Eclipse muttered and ignited her boosters, stopping her machine just above the beam. It scrapped across two of her HiMat feathers, but—for the most part—didn't harm her suit.
At least the beam didn't.
The missiles were still a major problem and even though the redhead avoided one potentially fatal attack, it was going to be tough to evade two. She didn't have Phase Shift like her teammates did and a couple of well-placed explosions from those things would take her out of the battle for sure. Perhaps even for good. Cursing, she pulled hard on the controls and pressed the petal to the ground, flying the Stealth a little bit upwards and to the right. Two missiles went between the suit's legs, landing harmlessly in the water while the other two went out wide. She had been lucky that time and almost sighed until she felt a large shadow cross over her. Looking up, she stared at the underside of the Archangel and the Valliant gun aimed directly at her.
Eclipse's instincts took over at that point. Bringing up her left hand, she fired the cannon in her left palm, watching as the thread of electricity shot out and wrapped around the barrel of the gun. She could just imagine the words to fire leaving the captain's mouth, and watching the end of that gun glow yellow, the redhead felt a sweat drop trickle down her cheekbone.
The electric shock damaged the Valliant, but not before it fired off part of its blast. Pulling hard on the controls once more, Eclipse tried to turn the Stealth away, but the shot seared off her left arm at the elbow in the attempt. The gun exploded within the next second, the force of the blast sending the redhead spiraling down towards the water.
The impact jostled her in the cockpit, making her, for the first time, happy the mechanics decided to give her a bit more personal space than the typical mobile suit. She definitely had a headache when everything calmed down, but that was more from the whiplash than from any kind of concussion. Her right forearm had snagged on something—but what she had no idea—creating a nice gash from the elbow down to the wrist. It wasn't anything serious, and was just going to be more annoying than life threatening. That was close.
The buzzers blared inside the cockpit and from the earpiece in her ear, reminding Eclipse of the current situation. If she didn't get to the surface soon, things were going to get rather ugly. The first thing she checked was her battery and staring at the screen in front of her, she felt her face go pale. Her battery was drained and—as she found out a second later—thanks to an accurate piece of shrapnel, there was no way she could initiate HFC-EPR. The piece of metal had cut deep into her own suit, severing the connection to the fuel cells and if it wasn't for the sudden drop into the water, her personal body parts would've been floating among the debris as well. The water coming in from her damaged arm and the hole made by the stray shrapnel flooded her suit enough to squelch any potential fire hazards.
Now that was lucky.
"Coffee Addict, status," she said into her head piece, bringing up an assortment of screens as the Stealth continued to sink. Another fortunate break was her place of decent, slowly floating to a rock outcrop some kilometers below her. At least she had a bit of time to think things over instead of drastically trying to call for help—or in worse case scenario, eject—if she couldn't get herself moving.
"Power at 0%, left arm immobile, propulsion limited," the Stealth reported into her ear.
In other words, I'm fucked, Eclipse thought gravely, switching a few buttons on her consol to grab someone's attention. After everything that had happened, she couldn't believe she was losing again. She had vowed to get revenge a many number of times, but each battle she participated in, she lost. How was that possible? She was revered as some monster and yet she hadn't won a fight yet against this damn ship. Cursing, she could hear the Berserker laughing in the back of her mind. Yes, perhaps if she had given into her other half on a regular basis, she'd be winning more, but was that really something she wanted to do? Namarra had called it a drug, but if it helped, wouldn't it be worth the addiction?
"Aegis, do you copy." Nothing. "Athrun, can you hear me?" Still nothing. Damn it. Fiddling with the controls once more, she figured she should be able to move the limbs at least; try for some kind of swim technique in order to reach the surface. The legs kicked a few times, but stopped soon after with a sickening cry.
"Mobility zero," the Stealth stated in her ear.
"The shrapnel must've moved and cut another line. Damnit! Athrun, open your goddamn ears and answer me!" It was all so ridiculous. If he didn't reply, it was either because he was fighting, or losing. Desperately, she tried the others, but it was the same outcome. What the hell is going on up there?
As if in answer, Eclipse saw another mobile suit hit the surface. At first, it was hard to make out the features, but when the current turned it, she nearly laughed out of pure joy. "Blitz, this is Stealth. Do you copy?" There was no immediate response, and when the current spun the machine again, she saw the severed right arm and cursed. Him too? "Nicol, are you okay? Nicol, answer me!"
"Eclipse, I'm fine. What's your status? I don't have a very good visual at the moment."
The redhead smiled. "I'm sinking a bit faster than you are, I'm afraid. Mind lending me a hand? Just look down." She chuckled a little—despite the circumstance—when the Blitz looked in her direction. She must've looked pitiful and the grin on his face probably held more surprise and grief than actual happiness, but it was all way too damn ironic to not seem funny.
"Give me a sec." Using his good arm, he fired one of his darts, having the metallic chord wrap around the suit's waste. "Let me find some land then I'll reel you in."
"Roger that," Eclipse responded, jerking along with the Stealth as the Blitz propelled them towards the nearest batch of land. Getting out of the water first, he made sure everything was decently clear before pulling the Stealth up onto the shore.
"Now that—"
"—was ridiculous," the redhead finished for him, enjoying that few seconds of bliss before the battle slapped them back to reality. The Duel and the Buster were no where in sight, but judging by the shots by the Archangel, they had to be somewhere in the water as well. Unlike Eclipse, however, they could still move. "What'd I miss?"
"The Strike's kicking our ass and those damn planes are annoying mosquitoes but rather persistent," he explained. "Ugh, how can we keep losing to them? Are they that lucky or are we just that unlucky?"
"Your guess is as good as mine. Are you still able to fight?"
"I'm beat up, but the Phase Shift is getting low."
"I suggest finding the Aegis. No doubt he's in the same condition and I hate the thought of anyone left alone—" Eclipse stopped, seeing that same red suit land about a mile away. The Archangel attacked almost as soon as he hit the ground, apparently done with the Duel and the Buster. Athrun dodged the bullets, but when he pulled out his beam rifle, the Strike advanced and sliced it in half. It looked like a losing battle and with the state the Aegis was probably in, the redhead wasn't too optimistic about the outcome. Flicking his wrist, the commander ignited his beam saber and tried to overtake the enemy that way, but everything was in the Earth Forces' favor. The Strike merely evaded the attack and punched the Aegis away. It landed with a loud crunch on the ground, Phase Shift dissipating immediately. "Athrun! Nicol—" Stopping, she looked up to where the Blitz was, but saw nothing.
Nicol was gone and time stopped; there was no other cliché way to put it.
The musician had disappeared and run to Athrun's suit before Eclipse could push the communication button. He did it on instinct, that she knew, but since when did instinct revolve around self-sacrifice? Wasn't the mind supposed to preserve the body?
Eclipse could feel the Berserker laughing that time, her laughter tickling her conscious as the blood drained from her cheeks. Nicol, stop, she mouthed, locking the words inside of her head instead of shouting them. But what good could it have done? Nicol was already a few steps away from the Strike and her machine was still halfway out of the water, sensors buzzing like a radio station moving in and out of clarity. The signals snickered and hissed at her in sporadic spurts, reminding her of her helplessness and weaknesses at the same time. If only I had—it's just like before.
"Athrun, get out!" the musician yelled, disengaging the Mirage Colloid just as he neared the enemy machine. Eclipse heard the words pour from his mouth and tried to hoist her unit back on land before he made the first attack.
The Strike moved first.
The dodge was textbook. So pretty, she would've congratulated the pilot after the fight if he wouldn't have killed a comrade with that small movement. In fact, she was sure the Berserker was laughing at the display, finding the whole experience exhilarating. But Eclipse could never be so heartless, so she just stared, mouth agape and hands shaking on the controls.
The Strike ducked under Nicol's frontal attack, its mechanical legs groaning at the awkward angle. Bracing himself, the pilot instinctively pulled his sword upwards and out to the side, making an angled cut from the Blitz's right hip into the cockpit.
Yes, the cockpit.
The Strike left the blade there as if to display his victory. It was such a merciless thing to do and watching the heat from the beam searing at the metal—melting it away from the skeleton of the machine—the redhead could only imagine the pilot's suffering. The blade eating away at his flesh all thanks to one moment of heroism. Only because he was a loyal friend.
Eclipse screamed.
"A-Athrun, r-run," Nicol barely managed, the Aegis pilot being the only one able to hear the words over the redhead's agonizing cry. He didn't dare believe what was happening. Could such an individual die? Could someone like Nicol deserve death? Catching his breath in his throat, he raised a hand up as if to snatch the musician from the cockpit himself. Nicol can't—
The Blitz exploded.
"Nicol!" he cried, but Eclipse's scream tore through the frequency louder, making Athrun throw off his helmet in a panic. There was more behind that scream than anger and he didn't feel as if he had the right to hear something so painful. In fact, the commander didn't even think there was any anger in that sound at all.
Agony; pure agony.
The Strike remained motionless on the ground, staring at the empty space where the Blitz once stood. Was he shocked? Or just mocking them with silent laughter? Whatever the cause for such hesitation, the battle was over and the Earth Alliance had gained the upper hand. But not for long, Athrun swore, debating whether or not to attack the stunned machine in front of him. His suit didn't have enough energy to do any major damage, but he was pissed enough to have his anger do more damage than any kind of weapon. Pulling on one lever, he felt his unit rise, but he hadn't gotten very far before the Archangel came into view. Cursing softly, he stopped. Dearka and Yzak had resurfaced from the water by that time, sending a barrage at the Strike no matter how close the Archangel was. They were just as pissed and could do a little more damage.
Futile.
The Archangel wasn't about to abandon its prized pilot, shooting an array of weaponry down at the ZAFT units. While the bullets could've damaged the suits, it didn't seem as if the Earth Alliance ship was trying to do such a thing, merely scare them into retreating. Unfortunately, it had worked. The Strike had already jumped out of harm's way and ignited its boosters, flying to the safety of the battleship's hangar. Athrun thought of speaking to Kira before he disappeared but stopped himself. What could he say? Thanks for killing a friend? He was beyond words, so the commander just let him go.
Another time they could talk.
Or just fight.
"We're retreating," Athrun ordered over the frequency. "Head back to the carrier. I'll grab the Stealth."
"Yes, sir," Dearka had responded, but Yzak remained silent. However, the Duel obeyed a second later, following the Buster away from the battle zone. Not even he was reckless enough to chase after the Archangel then. The team had no other choice than to regroup. No matter how frustrating that was.
The communication cut off, leaving Athrun alone in his cockpit once more. Staring down at the helmet near his feet, he bit his bottom lip. The echo of Eclipse's scream still resonated off his eardrums, sending a lonely shiver down his spine. He couldn't blame her—hell, he felt like screaming himself—but they had to keep a level head. That was the best course of action.
Right?
"Stealth, status," he called over the line, taking a step in her direction. Glancing sideways at the Archangel, the pilot made sure it wasn't trying to capture either his suit or the Stealth. He doubted they would risk everything for the one chance to grab the enemy, but he had to make sure. After everything that had happened, there was no way in hell he was going to give anyone else up. "Eclipse, respond."
"Left arm missing," she began after another pause, "power to main battery severed, back thrusters and legs unresponsive. Mobility zero." She sounded sassy—or even bitchy was a good description—and reluctant to answer. Her voice was a bit scratchy and the sound alone made Athrun swallow. Apparently, that scream had affected her mentally and physically.
"Roger that, Stealth. I'm coming to pick you up."
"Yes, sir."
Sir. Everyone was being so damned formal and he wanted to correct them, but he couldn't find the strength to. That's right, he was supposed to be the strong one.
Question was, could he be?
Eclipse waited in the hanger while the boys switched outfits in the locker room. She decided to let them go first for no other reason than because she didn't want to change yet. Changing meant she really was helpless to do anything and it wasn't a feeling she wanted to experience just then. When in doubt, bury the conscience in work. "What d'ya think?"
"I think you need to stop being so reckless," the mechanic grumbled, eyeing the Stealth angrily. He looked to be a guy in his mid-thirties, but with his eyebrows furled, he seemed about fifty. Perhaps it wasn't something the redhead should bring up.
"There's no such thing as a non-reckless battle. Removing the shrapnel and fixing the battery connection should be basic enough—"
"If not time consuming."
"—but the left arm is what I'm worried about," Eclipse continued. "I could fight without it, if need be. Just have to stabilize it."
"We do have an extra arm we can put in its place, but given the situation, I'm thinking you're all gonna fly out here again soon. Looking at the Aegis, we might not be able to get both suits done in time."
"As soon as I get my orders, I'll come in and help—"
"No," the mechanic interrupted, pointing a firm finger at her. "Get cleaned up and rested first. What's the point of fixing a machine if the pilot is too exhausted to use it properly? You do your job and we'll do ours."
Eclipse was going to argue, but the man had walked away, leaving her behind to just let her anger boil. She had wanted to keep working in order to keep her mind off of Nicol's death, but now she had just been ordered to take a nap and dream about it.
Ridiculous.
Subconsciously, she had been staring at the Blitz's empty dock, and snapping to, she just cursed and turned towards the locker room. What good was resting going to do? She'd just end up lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, and thinking. No, she wasn't going to give into her grief just yet. Time to get her orders.
"Why did he have to die like that? And why out here? Well?" Yzak's shouting startled the redhead. For some reason, she thought no one would even bring up the subject, choosing to mourn in his own way. The team had never been so vocal with each other and Nicol was really the only one holding them all together. What was going to happen now that he was gone? Was someone supposed to fill in that spot?
Eclipse hesitated before grabbing the handle. After the outburst, she really didn't want to go in anymore. Was she scared? Perhaps, and even her anger wasn't doing anything. A part of her had hoped the Berserker would just take over and numb her to it all, but instead her mind could only replay his death mercilessly. Damn it all.
She almost left altogether, fleeing to her Stealth and the small comfort that mechanical voice gave, but a louder sound from inside gave her enough incentive to turn the handle. Athrun had Yzak pinned against the locker, hands gripping his collar. It looked like any other argument until Eclipse saw a glimpse of tears in his eyes—well, both of their eyes actually. Dearka stood opposite her, looking just as helpless as the redhead felt. It's all so ridiculous and yet—can—can I blame them?
"Why don't you say it, Yzak? It was my fault! He only died because he was trying to save me!" Athrun shouted, tightening his grip. His hands trembled with the effort, but judging by the look on the commander's face, it looked to be out of restraint. Athrun didn't want to hit his comrade, but things were moving so fast his psyche just couldn't handle it anymore. So, he broke.
Yzak said nothing, just grabbed the commander's hands and tried to dislodge them. The Duel pilot seemed to be his angry self, but slammed up against the lockers like he was, the boy just looked defeated. Even his struggling held little strength, so did he want Athrun to hit him? Perhaps it would've made him feel a little better. Hell, it probably would've made both of them feel better.
"A-Athrun! You too Yzak," Dearka began, taking a step forward. "Fighting each other isn't gonna help us one bit. Remember the Strike is our real enemy!" That seemed to snap them out of it. Yzak shook his commander off and pushed him out of the way, stomping past his blonde comrade and out the door without even changing. "Y-Yzak!" Dearka shouted, running after him.
Eclipse and Athrun were left alone. The redhead hadn't even stepped fully into the locker room, standing in the doorway and debating whether or not to talk her commander. She could try and comfort him, but what good would that do? She wanted her Berserker to take all the pain, so it wasn't as if she was able to do any emotional consoling. Sighing, she gave in and stepped inside, shutting the door behind her.
Athrun heard her come in, but couldn't turn around to face her. After everything she had said only a few hours earlier, how could he even think his words would have any volume; mean anything? Surprisingly, she didn't snap. He half expected her to be at his throat, shoving him against the locker—much like he had just done to Yzak—however, unlike the commander's little outburst, she would've done more to him than just scream in his face. But then, he wasn't scared of her. In fact, he probably would've retaliated, if only because he was just as upset. Anything she would've said would've set him off in an instant.
After all, Nicol died protecting him.
"What are you going to do?" Eclipse asked softly and took a step forward. It was a small gesture, but one that made Athrun tense. Was he expecting more than just talk? The commander still said nothing and she pressed again, "Ath—" The redhead barely got his name out before he snapped to her side and pinned her against the same locker as he had Yzak. Pushing his forearm up under her chin and grabbing her lower arm with the other, he braced himself against the bench behind him. He couldn't underestimate her abilities, but looking into her eyes, he knew she wouldn't do anything to change her situation. Why? He wanted she scream then, but leaned forward instead, his face inches away from hers, and straddled her lower body, making her escape even more impossible.
"You want to say it, don't you?" he snapped, the words coming out in a breathless threat. "Why don't you? Bask in your little victory?"
Eclipse did nothing, matching his glare with a blank one of her own. The breath on her face was hot and moist, matching the eyes she was staring into, however—unlike that breath—they flickered with a deeper anger. She watched those green eyes carefully, seeing them break in and out of that lifeless expression she had seen on her own face countless times. Was he like her? Just not awakened yet?
"Well?" he pressed, tightening his grip on her pinned forearm, feeling the clamminess in his fingers and palms thanks to the open wound and tear in her pilot suit. Apparently, he wasn't as angry as she thought. No, he was more scared than anything and—most likely—feeling terribly guilty. But was guilt enough to make him snap? Anger was what always triggered her. Was it different for each person?
"Why won't you say anything?"
"What did you want me to say?"
"What you're supposed to say!"
"And what's that, huh? Where's my script, let me look it up."
"Stop being such an ass!" Athrun yelled, pressing his face near hers. Eclipse got a good look at his eyes then, still flickering back and forth between lifeless and warmth. However, there was still something different about them; a difference that actually made the redhead sad. While his eyes may've begun clouding over, his pupils remained, giving even the heartless look a sense of humanity.
Maybe he wasn't like her.
He stared at her a bit longer before Eclipse just sighed, placing the free hand on his shoulder and pushing him away. He resisted at first, but slowly he backed up. "And why would I take pleasure in this?" The boy didn't respond. "You have to calm down commander and think of what we're going to do next. Do we pursue them right away? The Aegis was pretty damaged, but we can quicken the repairs if we just give the other suits more ammo. The Stealth's in an ugly position right now, but as soon as I'm patched up, I'll help quicken the repairs." Still, Athrun said nothing, plopping down on the nearest bench and staring at the clenched fists in his lap. At any other time, the redhead probably would've left him with his thoughts, but they were losing valuable time. He had to make a decision.
Smack.
The boy shook off his surprise as his hand instantly went to the stinging skin on his face. A slap seemed liked cheating after everything that had happened, but when he looked up at Eclipse, he realized no foul play had taken place. A couple of tears welded up in the corners of her eyes, making him want to slap himself again for not even considering what she might've been going through. "Do you want revenge or not?" she asked, her own eyes starting their flickering to her Berserker half. Not even Eclipse could hide her emotions for an extended period of time.
"Is that really the answer?"
"Do we have a choice?"
Did they have a choice? Her words had wounded a part of him, but replaying Nicol's death in his mind, he knew they had to retaliate. Kira had gone too far and it was his own fault Nicol had died. "Get cleaned up," he ordered, "and try to get as much rest as you can. We'll send out another attack as soon as the mobile suits are running and before our anger subsides."
"Roger that," Eclipse responded, and left the room. She'd leave Athrun to his thoughts and let him grieve. No doubt he had more conflicting emotions than she did.
The Berserker just wanted the Strike destroyed.
"So, do you think she'll take the bait?" Phoebe asked, leaning her chin on the back of the chair as she sat in it backwards. She always felt it was more comfortable sitting that way, but found it hard convincing the others. Even though there was no back rest, she at least could fall asleep if need be.
FS didn't respond right away, watching his companion silently from his seat near the computer. They had gone over this scenario plenty of times before, but still she kept asking him to repeat himself. Frankly, it was getting annoying—and them being so suspicious wasn't exactly comforting—but he had to keep indulging her or he'd lose his position.
"I'm with Phoebe on this one, I don't think she's gonna bite," Melanie added to her sister's right. She was lying comfortably on the floor, pulling on the shaggy carpet like some monkey would flees. Unfortunately, FS was used to those two always hanging out in his room, but—for once—he wished they'd let him do some work. As it stood, they had more "playtime" than actual work time. Depending on his mood, that could've been a good thing or a bad thing.
Right then, it was bad.
"Finding that other assassin wasn't easy, girls, and even if the info we sent isn't necessarily true, it's enough to get Eclipse sweating at least."
"And what's the point of that? Why do we care so much about her anyway?" Phoebe asked.
"To be honest, Gluttony was the only one to give a shit, but since he's stuck up in space for now, I'm hoping to get a little time with her myself. Either she comes to our side or she's dead. It's as simple as that."
"Wow," Melanie began, "why the change of heart?"
"I'm just exhausted," FS explained, rubbing his temples at the thought. "I'm not about to go out of my way to talk some sense into her if she doesn't want to do it. I'm neither persistent nor patient."
"But what about that other girl?" Melanie asked. "I have a feeling they'll come together."
"That's where you two come in. Leave Eclipse to me, and you two do as you please. I really don't care about her."
The girls smiled at that and gave each other a high five, laughing afterward like some children at recess. FS merely sighed, looking away from the immature display to stare at the black screen. If Eclipse came running after that message he sent, she had grown soft. Sure, her and Stray had some kind of connection that the brunette never seemed to be in on, but she was leaving herself vulnerable if she wanted to play some superhero. Then again, she'd be attacking more for revenge, but it was all the same to him. Those two Berserkers were the main obstacles in his way. He didn't like the prospect of challenging them, but now he really had no choice. I can't wait to see you again, FS thought, waving the girls out of his room. Let's see where this story of ours will take us, shall we?
A/N: Alright, that break was a bit longer than anticipated. Sorry about that. Two workshop classes are a pain in the ass. Ironically, I wrote most—if not all—of this over spring break. So, basically, if I had had the time before, this would've been out a long time ago. Gotta love school.
On to the chapter… Nicol no!!! *sobs* I was always heartbroken when I saw that part, but I almost cried when I had to do research for this chapter. Talk about putting myself in Eclipse's shoes. I mean, can you imagine her scream? Eclipse scream? She's done it out of pure frustration, but out of sadness/agony? *Shivers* This is probably one of her moments in pure emotion. Scary.
So, did I do it justice? I changed some things, I admit. Rather minor things to fit my narrative, but changes nonetheless. Worked? Yes or No? Let me know because this chapter made me a bit nervous…
And, y'know what? I'm getting sick of Eclipse having to lose all the time. ZAFT really get its ass handed to them in these beginning episodes. I never really understood how that was possible with four mobile weapons verses on ship, a plane, and one mobile suit, but it's slowly making more sense. The Archangel crew is rather good. Even the volunteers deserve a round of applause. Score one for the Naturals.
Anyway, Namarra will be back in the next chapter and an "epic" battle against the Lust girls will begin. This, my friends, will give an all new meaning to "bitch fight," and "battle royale." No one's really safe when Berserkers and drug addicts clash, not even teammates.
And, for the sake of the fans, there will be some Eclipse and Yzak cuteness-ish. ("-ish" because I don't do the cuteness stuff very well…)
Thanks again to all of you out there who give me the inspiration to keep writing. I'd be just some wannabe fan without your support. Special thanks to my Betas who are overly anal—for good reason—but have great suggestions overall. I do wonder, however, what would happen if Murdoch was drunk and put the wrong food coloring into the Archangel's weaponry. Pink Gottfried blasts anyone?
On that note, see you all next chapter!
Questions/Gripes:
I realize I just skipped the whole conflict in Orb after Athrun stopped Eclipse from killing Kira, but I had to move on with the story. I think I had been dawdling around for long enough and need to get moving with the storyline. Besides, it would've just been a bit of hand-to-hand fighting that would've caused a huge uproar given their proximity to Morgenroete, Cagalli may've recognized Eclipse, and it could've been a huge disaster. Basically, it was a road I didn't feel like strolling down, so sorry if it's a huge let down that nothing immediately happened. Eclipse stewing seems like it would've worked a bit more to me and the fact that Namarra suddenly sent that message and messed with her mind a bit more, only made it more fun.