A/N: Not gonna lie… It starts off kind of slow, but it gets interesting. But you'll like it. I think. Italicized text is a flashback.

-Thursday, 18 March-

Sawyer's POV

"I am here with Joey Graceffa and Sawyer Hartman and we are currently walking to my car to go to the airport. For what, you ask? Oh, just for a little convention called Playlist Live. Maybe you've heard of it…" Kaya said as Joey and I walked behind her to the elevator. As we got on it, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw that I had a new text from my mom. I quickly swiped the screen and entered my password.

Mom: Can't wait to see you! Let me know when you get situated. I love you!

S: Okay mom. Love you too

I slid my phone back into my pocket and leaned against the wall opposite Kaya. Joey and Kaya were talking to each other about Playlist and what to expect. My eyes never left Kaya though. I found that happening a lot lately now that I think about it.

I've always had a tendency to seek her out in a room, but over the past couple of weeks it seems as if this tendency has increased tenfold. And I'm surprised she hasn't called me out on my borderline stalker-ish behavior. But it's kind of hard not to stare at her; she's fucking gorgeous and sweet and—

"What do you think, Sawyer?" Joey asked me. I tore my eyes away from Kaya and looked at him.

"Sorry, what did you say?" I asked him. He rolled his eyes and sighed.

"We were talking about getting something to eat on the way to the airport. We wanted to know what your opinion on this was."

"I don't care. I already ate, but if you guys are hungry then I won't stop you." I told them and they nodded.

"I'm seriously craving McDonald's right now. I haven't had it in like, years." Kaya said as we made our way out of the elevator and to her car.

"That's so unhealthy though…" Joey said. Kaya rolled her eyes as she put her suitcase in the back.

"I think that's the point, Joey." I said with a chuckle. "Did you expect her to go to Whole Foods so you could get something from the salad bar?" I asked jokingly.

"Fuck you." He muttered, causing Kaya to giggle as she closed the trunk and got in the car. I shrugged and walked to the passenger side door. As I reached out to grab the door handle, my hand collided with Joey's. We turned our heads to look each other and I raised my eyebrow.

"Back seat, Graceffa." I said and pushed him out of the way. He scoffed and pushed me back.

"As if. You've gotten the chance to sit shotgun in her new car multiple times; I've never even been in it." Joey argued. Kaya watched us with an amused face as we continued to bicker about who would get to sit in the front. After a few minutes, the window started to go down.

"Can't you just settle this with a game of 'Rock, Paper, Scissors' like normal people?" Kaya asked us, leaning across the center console. Joey and I turned to each other.

"After three." I said and he nodded. We did this about five times, and Joey ended up winning. I opened the rear door and got in. Kaya rolled the passenger side window up and put the car in gear. We drove out of the lot and onto the surprisingly sparse road. When we pulled up to a red light, Kaya plugged her phone in and we were bombarded by a heavy bass and loud beat. Kaya quickly reached to turn the volume and bass down.

"Sorry about that." She apologized and glanced in the rearview mirror. "Forgot to turn it down when I came home last night." A small smirk danced on her lips as our eyes locked.

"Speaking of last night, where were you? I went over to your place to see if you wanted to film a video but you never answered." Joey said. Kaya looked at Joey briefly and waved him off.

"I was just roaming around LA. Went to the beach for a while…"

"Wait, where are we going?" Kaya asked me.

"You'll see eventually." I told her as I secured the scarf around her eyes, making sure I didn't get any of her hair in the knot.

"Just give me a vague answer then, Sawyer." She groaned. "I don't like surprises that much."

"Well, surprise, you'll have to get used to them. I'm full of surprises." I said and pecked her cheek. I grabbed onto her hand and led her through the apartment. I stopped at the door and fished her keys out of her jacket pocket and we left. I carefully maneuvered her down the hallway and into the elevator. The ride down to the garage was slow. I crossed my arms over my chest and ceaselessly tapped my fingers against my biceps. When the elevator chimed and the doors opened, I led Kaya over to her car and opened the passenger side door for her.

"Watch your step, and head." I said and helped her into the car and buckled her seatbelt.

"Please tell me where we're going."

"No." I said and closed the door. I jogged over to the other side and climbed in. I started the car and pulled out of the garage.

"Can you hand me your phone?" I asked Kaya as I drove. She reached into the pocket of her shorts and pulled out her phone. I took it from her and replaced my hands on the wheel with my knee as I plugged her phone into the radio.

"The password is 1-9-9-1." I typed the numbers in quickly and put one of my hands back on the wheel. As I pulled up to a red light I tapped the music icon and scrolled through her playlists.

"Why do you have so many playlists?" I asked her.

"I have a playlist for every mood or occasion." I nodded, even though she couldn't see me, and tapped on a random playlist. I pressed on the gas as the light turned green and continued toward our destination. As we got closer I gradually turned the volume of the music up to mask the ambient sounds.

"Sawyer, I can barely hear myself think… Can you turn this down?" Kaya yelled over the music.

"I'm not going to risk you figuring out where we're going." I replied and pulled into a parking spot. I turned the car off and put the keys in my pocket. Thankfully the waves weren't as active today as they have been the past few days. I looked out onto the sand and saw Cyr guarding the spot I had picked out. I got out and walked over to get Kaya out of the car.

"Okay, I'm going to turn around and you're going to get on my back." I told her and she nodded. She carefully turned in the seat. I turned around and she wrapped her legs around my waist tightly and her arms around my shoulders. I shut the door and started walking down to Cyr. He waved and gave me a thumbs up as we neared him. We were left alone shortly after.

"I'm going to let you down now, okay?" I asked and she nodded. I released my grip from her thighs and she hopped off of my back. I turned her around and carefully untied the scarf.

"You're honestly the cutest person ever." Kaya said as she looked down at the blanket and picnic basket.

"I try." I said with a shrug. We both sat down on the blanket and remained silent for a while, just looking at the waves break on the shore line.

"Thank you." She whispered and entwined her hand with mine.

"Anything for you." I said and kissed her cheek.

After a while, we moved everything to Kaya's car and sat in the back and watched the sunset. I have no idea how long we were at the beach but we occupied ourselves with each other, stealing kisses every once in a while until stealing small kisses weren't enough for either of us. It was nice. I wish we wouldn't have to go to a deserted part of the beach to retreat to when I wanted to take her out. I'm trying to be supportive with the whole 'secret relationship' thing for the time being, but I'm not that kind of guy. I'm not like Sam; I want to flaunt Kaya and be able to do anything I please with her in public. But I can't and it sucks. Even though that hasn't really stopped me from doing anything, which then causes Kaya to keep reprimanding me. Which only makes me want to do it more, because she's kind of hot when she's mad.

We arrived back to the apartments around midnight. I made sure to not plug Kaya's phone in so the ride back was quiet.

"Sawyer! Are you listening to me?" Joey asked me. I snapped my head around and looked at Joey.

"No, I wasn't." He sighed and rolled his eyes.

"We're here." He said. I unbuckled my seatbelt and got out. Kaya handed me my suitcase and we walked through the parking lot and through the airport.

.

"Hello, Florida!" Kaya said as we walked through the doors of the airport. The sun was high in the sky and people walked around with smiles on their faces.

"So I was thinking that we could shoot a whole shit load of videos with the Brits and just have like, a huge stock pile of them." Joey suggested. Kaya nodded and started talking with him about all the new video ideas she's had and I minded my own business. Along with constantly, and creepily, staring at Kaya I have found myself thinking a lot more. Not that I never did, but I've just been thinking about very… different things. Things that I never thought of before, like a possible future with Kaya. Moving in with Kaya. Having a fa—

"—Dinner?" I looked over at Kaya and Joey. They were looking at me expectantly and waiting for me to answer whatever question they had just asked me.

"What is going through that head of yours that has you so enraptured?" Kaya asked me.

"What? Oh, nothing important, promise." I told her with a smile. "Dinner sounds good."

-Friday, 21 March-

Kaya's POV

"What are you thinking about?" Sawyer asked me, watching as the sand cascaded back down to the ground through my fingers.

"Us." I told him.

"What about us?"

"How we'll tell people about us. I mean, a fair amount of people already have an inkling that we're together because you're terrible at keeping PDA at zero—"

"Excuse me for trying to show you affection." Sawyer interrupted.

"I have no problem with you doing that, but subtlety is just not your forte. Anyway, I don't know if I want to just ease into it, or just come right out and say it…"

"Well since I'm so terrible at subtlety, maybe we should just be straightforward with everyone." He said and adjusted his hat.

"Did I make you mad?" I asked and dumped the rest of the sand out of my hands. Sawyer shook his head.

"No, I'm just mad at myself." He said and brought his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them.

"Why? You've done nothing wrong, just—"

"Because I keep messing this up. I keep getting too caught up in what we have and I keep forgetting that you want this to remain on the down low for the time being." He turned his head and looked at me. I pursed my lips tapped my fingers on my legs.

"You know what; fuck this whole secrecy thing then." I said. Sawyer's eyes widened and he lifted his head from his knees.

"What do you mean?"

"I know I'm being a huge hypocrite right now for going against what I originally said, but I honestly do not care anymore. I know you won't hurt me, and I trust you more than I trust myself for some reason, so here's the new plan." I said and turned my body so I could face him and crossed my legs.

"We won't say anything. We'll keep doing what we're doing, but to an extent. But one thing will remain the same and that is when it comes to questions, we bypass them the best we can. On whatever day you said—"

"April fifth." Sawyer said quickly.

"On April fifth we'll do some sort of video like an 'Ask' or 'Tag' video and just drop it like it's nothing and see how people take it." I finished. I carefully watched Sawyer as he let what I just said sink in.

"You're sure about this?" He asked and I nodded.

"I am beyond sure this time." I assured him.

.

"Hi, how has your time at Playlist been?" I asked the girl standing in front of me. The line was getting shorter and the people were getting less frantic thankfully.

"It's been nice, thanks." She said. I quickly signed my name and passed her journal back to her. "Um, can I maybe get a picture with you?"

"Of course!" I said and stood up. I rounded the table and stood next to her. I waited patiently as she fumbled with her phone. We took a few pictures and chatted for a bit before she said goodbye. I remained standing in front of the table for the rest of the people that were waiting in line. It was much easier that way instead of having to get up constantly.

As I was gathering my things after the last person in the line left, I felt a pair of strong arms snake around my waist.

"And you thought people forgot about you." Sawyer whispered in my ear. "I've been waiting for two hours for you to finish up."

"Well, I actually hold conversations with everyone in my line." I told him and picked up my bag from the table. Sawyer removed his arms from my waist and draped one across my shoulders.

"That's nice of you." He said and I shrugged. "Anyway, all of us are going to go make videos. Are you coming?"

"Of course I am. I need to catch up with everyone." I said as we walked out of the building and to the hotel.

When we got to the hotel, we hurried to Sawyer's room and I grabbed one of his hoodies. Since I packed in a hurry, at the last possible minute, I neglected to pack any sweaters for when I would be inside the hotel. And the hotel was absolutely freezing. I sort of felt bad for keeping everyone waiting, so we practically ran from Sawyer's room to Alfie's. As soon as we knocked on the door, we were greeted by Zoe.

"Oh my gosh, I've missed you so much!" She said as she pulled me into a hug.

"I've missed you too." I told her. Sawyer and I made our rounds and sat down on the other bed.

"So, I have a video idea but I don't know who to film it with." Louise spoke up.

"What is it, Chummy?" Zoe asked.

"It's that YouTube superlative thing that Joey and Tyler have done."

"I'll do it. It seems like fun." I told her and she nodded.

"We can do it here. Can you guys help think of categories?" She asked and everyone nodded.

After half an hour of people shouting, Louise and I finally had a nice list of superlatives and the camera was being set up by Marcus. When he was done, he gave us a thumbs up to show that it was recording.

"Aloha, sprinklerinos! I'm here with my friend Kaya, and we are going to be doing the YouTube Awards video that Tyler, Marcus, and a bunch of other YouTubers have done." She started off.

We went through all the categories and had a few debates on our choices with the other YouTubers in the room. The biggest debate was for Rear of the Year, which was still being debated twenty minutes after Louise and I finished filming.

"Marcus, your argument is invalid. My g—Kaya's butt is nicer than yours." Sawyer said. Marcus' eyebrows raised and he tilted his head to the side.

"What were you going to say before you corrected yourself, Sawyer?" He asked him. Sawyer gulped and shot me a worried look. He was cornered, literally, and there was no escaping this. Zoe and Louise looked over at me. I gave them a wary smile and they narrowed their eyes at me.

"We may or may not be dating…" I said quietly.

"What?!" Zoe asked me, eyes nearly falling out of her head. "And you didn't tell me?"

"I mean, it's only been a month…" Sawyer said.

"This is so great! You are absolutely adorable!" Louise commented.

"What's your ship name?" Zoe asked me and I shrugged.

"Kawyer, I guess." I said. "But do go tweeting or talking about it. Only the people in this room along with a few others know about us."

"Yeah, we're keeping this to ourselves for a little while longer. So, we'd really appreciate it if you act like nothing ever happened." Sawyer told them and they all nodded.

"We can do that, we did it with Alfie and Zoe, so." Marcus said with a shrug.

"Thanks, guys." I told them with a smile. I looked out through the balcony doors and noticed that it was still light out. "Do you guys want to go to the beach before it gets dark?"

"Yes." Everyone said. I nodded once and got up from the bed.

"We'll meet in the lobby, yeah?" They nodded and Sawyer and I left to head up to our rooms.

"What's with you and the beach lately?" Sawyer asked me as we walked down the hallway. "This will be the second time that you've gone today."

"It's like this safe haven for me, I guess. It clears my mind. Takes away all the negative thoughts I have." I told him.

"I can do that to, you know." He said and pulled me closer to him. "Help you clear your head, that is. I've been told that I'm good at distracting people."

"And how would you accomplish that, Mr. Hartman?" I asked Sawyer as we got on the elevator. I'm pretty sure there wasn't anything that he could do to occupy my mind and keep me from thinking about everything that's happened since August.

"I can think of a few things."He said, his voice lower than normal.

Sawyer's POV

"Well we're going to have people waiting on us, again, in the lobby. So I'm afraid whatever you had planned to do to distract me won't be happening." She told me. I formed my lips into a pout and leaned against the wall.

"They can wait." I said.

"It'd be wrong." She told me and I shrugged. "I'm not Sam. I can't try to escape my problems through physical relations with people."

"Physical relations? Are you afraid to say the word 'sex'?" I asked her. She shook her head and exited the elevator once it got to our floor. I followed closely behind her and watched as she pulled her room key from her pocket and unlocked the door. I followed her into her room and sat on her bed.

"No." She said and unzipped her suitcase. "It's just that I don't want it to happen because I'm stressed. I want it to actually mean something, Sawyer." She plucked a bathing suit from the bottom and turned towards the bathroom. She changed quickly and walked back out of the bathroom and over to me.

"Can you tie this, please?" She asked and I nodded. I took the strings from her and tied them tightly behind her neck. She slipped her tank top back on and picked her sunglasses up off of the nightstand.

"We better go to your room so you can change." She said and I nodded. We left her room and walked down to mine. She waited patiently as I changed into my swim trunks. When I emerged from my room, I held her hand tightly.

"I'm sorry if I made you upset." I told her. "And I'm sorry that I didn't think before I spoke, and I'd just like to let you know that I am an idiot."

"You're not an idiot. I just have this warped idea of relationships because of Sam and another relationship of mine." She said quietly. I looked down at her and tilted her chin up with my free hand.

"And what is that warped idea?" I asked her.

"I equate relationships with meaningless sex and emotionless occurrences because that's all I've ever experienced, and that makes me just as bad as Sam. And I don't want to be Sam. I don't want that type of relationship anymore, that's why I tried so hard to have some sort of emotion in mine and Sam's excuse of a relationship. I just… I don't want to be used or use people for selfish reasons. It's wrong." At this point we had stopped walking and were standing in the middle of the vacant hallway. Kaya's gaze had shifted from me to the floor.

"So… so if that's what you see me as, as some way to leave reality and escape your problems for a few hours, then… Then this isn't going to work, and maybe we should just end this, because I don't want to get hurt again." She sniffled and her voice cracked. I cupped her face in my hands and made her look at me.

"I would never in a million years do that to you." I told her and wiped a stray tear from her cheek with my thumb. "I am so, so sorry that you've only been in those kinds of relationships. But Kaya, you mean too much to me for me to treat you like that. I promise that I will show you what a real relationship is like. And that means letting me buy things for you without you protesting." I said with a chuckle. Kaya laughed meekly and wiped under her eyes. I removed my hands from her face and messed with the drawstring on my swim trunks.

"If you tell me to jump I'll ask you how high, because Kaya…" I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, bracing myself for her reaction to what I'm about to say.

"I'm in love with you, and there's nothing you can do or say that will make me ever change my mind." I told her and waited for her to say something, but she didn't. She just stared at me, mouth agape, arms limp at her sides.

"That was probably a bit too fast, and you don't have to say it back, but—" I was cut off by her crashing her lips onto mine. My hands found their way to her waist and pulled her closer to me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled away slightly.

"You talk too much." Kaya said and pecked my lips quickly. "You do realize the weight of those words is astronomical, right?" She asked me and I nodded.

"I've wanted to say them for months, to be honest." I told her and she smiled.

"So have I, believe it or not."

A/N: So that happened…

Say what you want. Idc. I went back and forth for days about the ending and I decided that I would do what I originally planned on doing, regardless of reactions. In my mind, it makes sense considering Sawyer has had these feeling for Kaya sense day one (and Kaya tried to deny her feelings for Sawyer for a while).

Besides that, I have mapped out a good amount of chapters after this one, pretty much from here to the end end... I'm not exactly sure how long this will turn out to be (probably around sixty/sixty-five chapters but that could change). So, question time:

Should I make this one big 'book'/work, or should I end this one after a certain point and then make like, a sequel to this with what happens after this one would end? So it would end up being WSMTO and then the sequel would be called something along the lines of He Found the One or something like that.

Also I'm now on my Spring Break, so I'll have more time to work on the next chapter so there might be a quicker update. - Katy