"You think you deserve this pain, that this is your cross to bear…" — Sinclair, "Ye Who Enter Here"
Even the air in Arkadia seemed different when they returned. The two rovers lurched to stops in the hangar and the eleven of them ambled out, stretching after being cramped into the confining spaces for hours. No one in the crowded hangar gave Roan and Indra a second look, no one cared that they were there. Anyone who did was long gone by now.
The group dispersed, they all had their tasks to take care of before the announcement was made in an hour's time. Bellamy and Lincoln left first, charged with the most unpleasant undertaking of the group. The other kids trickled out, all except Clarke and Benja.
"We must see to our warriors, we will be back for your ceremony." Indra said the last word like it offended her personally. She and Roan walked through the outer door toward the gate; they had passed their field of tents on the way in, just outside the gates of Arkadia.
"They think what we are doing is unnecessary, don't they?" Abby asked, watching their backs disappear from sight. Kane nodded, his arms crossed over his chest.
"Our people need it, Abby, who cares what they think?" He said, reaching for her hand. She laced her fingers with his and walked with him toward their quarters, Clarke and Benja trailing. Kane unlocked the door and led the way into the room, releasing Abby's hand as he sat on the couch and pulled his backpack from his shoulders.
"Is that…?" Clarke asked, walking slowly toward the painting on the wall. Abby glanced at Kane and found his head leaned against the back of the couch, his eyes closed. She frowned before turning to her daughter. Clarke's hand was reached out toward the painting but she wasn't touching it.
Clarke turned back to them and she looked from Abby to Kane, whose eyes were still closed. Hers settled on her mother's and Abby nodded her head at Marcus. Clarke glanced his way and asked, "Why?"
"He wanted you to have it," Abby said quietly.
"Monty said you liked it," Kane said, his eyes remaining closed. The Griffin women looked at each other and Abby saw a flicker of fondness pass over Clarke's face.
"Thank you," Clarke whispered before turning back to the painting and staring at the brush strokes like Abby figured she had many times before. She smiled before sitting next to Kane. She leaned against him and his arm wrapped around her waist on reflex.
"You should go to Medical," he said after a moment, his hand running along her side. She shook her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes, feeling the fatigue of the past few days really set in. "Abby…"
"Marcus, there will be plenty of time to check on patients after. Can't we just relax for a second?" She asked, sighing.
A breathy laugh escaped him. "We never have time to relax."
"When is the last time you just watched a football match?" She asked before placing a gentle kiss against his neck. She opened her eyes to look at him; he had a small grin on his face, but it was pained, she wondered if she had said something wrong.
"I think the last time was with Jake and Thelonious," he said quietly. Her face fell.
"Marcus, I—" she reached up to stroke his face, but his hand caught hers as his eyes opened to look at her.
"It's okay," he said quickly, but she wasn't entirely convinced.
Abby glanced across the room at her daughter and found her staring at them. Clarke blinked and walked toward Benja who was busying himself with the kettle. He was pouring out four mugs when she reached him. Abby tapped Marcus' arm and nodded toward them, he turned to watch.
"Chit daun bilaik? | What's that?" Clarke asked, looking down into one of the mugs.
"Souda | A drink," Benja said, not meeting her eyes. "Tea."
"Ai na? | May I?" She asked, pointing to a mug. He nodded, staring at the floor.
"Yu get in | You know," Clarke said quietly as she picked up the mug. Abby suddenly felt like they were intruding on a private moment. "Ai don nou vout in ai na don stribro. | I never thought I would have a little brother."
"Let's leave them," Abby whispered, tugging on Kane's hand. He stood and let her lead him toward their bedroom.
"Marcus, Abby." Benja was hurrying to them, carrying two mugs of tea. Kane took both of them and said, "Thank you, Ben."
He smiled and walked back to Clarke who was waiting for him, taking a sip of the tea. Abby touched Kane's arm and he followed her into their bedroom. He set both mugs down on the desk before sitting in the chair. He rested his elbows on the tabletop and put his head in his hand, absently moving the handle of his mug back and forth.
"Does Lexa trust us again?" Abby asked, picking up her tea. She surveyed him over the rim of the mug before taking a sip, surprised by the citrus flavor that met her tongue.
He nodded slowly, turning his head in his hand to look at her. "We are the 13th Clan, there is no doubt about it. We go to war next week. Again."
He reached for his mug and took a long drink of it. He stared down into it, seemingly surprised by the contents. "We should let that boy add to the garden."
"Our boy," she reminded him.
Kane smiled and nodded. "Our boy, yes." He looked at her, the corners of his eyes crinkled, and asked, "Did you ever think…?"
She shook her head and set her empty mug on the desk before stepping next to his chair. "Not on the Ark, never. But since we came here, I've entertained the thought once or twice."
He grinned and looked into the mug of tea before he emptied it. He set it down, turned in his seat, and placed his hands on her hips to pull her closer. "Well, we have a kid now. He's a bit older than the one I thought we would have," he smiled, running his hands along her stomach absently, "but he's ours."
Abby brushed her lips against his forehead. She whispered, "It's still not too late."
His eyes slowly rose to meet hers, searching for some answer she didn't know the question to. She reached up and cradled his face in her hands, running her thumbs along his cheeks, over the new beard growing there. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers.
"I should check on the guard, see how they are progressing," he whispered against her lips. She shook her head, pulling him in for another kiss, parting his lips with her tongue. Her fingers dove into his hair and held him close to her, she could feel his nails digging into her hips and welcomed the passion she brought out of him.
"It takes a while to dig graves, Marcus," she whispered when she finally broke the kiss. He nodded and pulled her back to him.
They had dug nine graves — one for every Sky Person who had died — behind Alpha Station. Roan had already had his people taken care of after the battle. The bodies lay next to their respective graves, wrapped in sheets. Sinclair had taken care over the past two days to cut out their names on metal plaques for the grave markers.
Kane and Abby stood at the front of the group; everyone from camp had turned out — all of those who weren't still in Medical. When it was clear that they weren't waiting for any stragglers, Kane nodded to Helm and Costa who left to bring out the prisoner. He stepped away from Abby and addressed the group. "Today, we honor those we lost in the battle to reclaim Arkadia. The fighting took nine from us and we pay tribute to their sacrifices today—"
"Yeah, but why are we burying those four with ours?" Wick called, nodding toward the bodies of Abbot, Banks, Bogdanovic, and Gillmer.
"Because, like it or not, they were still our people and deserve to be respected in death." Kane said bluntly, scanning the group in front of him as if he expected someone to challenge him on the issue. No one did. Helm and Costa returned with William Lacroix in handcuffs.
"What's he doing here?" Nate Miller spat, stepping out from the crowd and toward the former member of the Guard.
"He's here for the same reason you are, Nate," Kane said, nodding toward the bodies of the four people no one in the crowd really cared about. "He's here for them. Someone should be, they were still people. They still deserve to be remembered."
"If you say so, Chancellor," Nate said, glaring at him before stalking off to his father's body.
"Thank you," Lacroix whispered, staring at their bodies.
"Shut up," Kane snapped before walking toward the graves. He turned toward the crowd again when he stood halfway between the nine graves. He said, "Whoever wishes to say something on behalf of the deceased may do so now."
He walked back to Abby's side and stood with her. Sinclair was the first to step out of the crowd, followed by Bennett who stood next to the grave, waiting.
"Gabriella was as caring as they come and I'm lucky to have called her my wife for twenty years," Sinclair said quietly, staring hard at his wife's body. He looked to Kane as he said, "The only comfort I find is knowing that her murderer suffered a harsh death."
He hopped down into the grave and, together with Bennett, managed to lower Gabriella into the hole in the ground. He pulled himself out gingerly and glanced back down into the grave one last time before rejoining the crowd.
It was Nate Miller's turn next. He beckoned Kane over and he hopped down into the grave, waiting for Nate to join him. Nate stared at his father's body as he said quietly, "I know who my dad was and that's all that matters."
Kane nodded and said, "That's enough, Nate."
He placed a hand on the boy's shoulder and their eyes met. Kane saw how hard Nate was trying to keep his emotions in check, but the tears were so close to breaking free. Kane reached for David's body and Nate did the same. They lowered him to the dirt and Nate knelt in the grave for a moment, lifting the sheet and removing his father's watch. The two men pulled themselves out of the hole and rejoined the crowd.
Rebecca, Jones Meikle, and Jeff Trebenski stood for Paul Slater. Rebecca said a few words about how kind and thoughtful Paul was, how he had saved her life during the battle, as Jones and Jeff lowered him into his grave. Harper spoke of Zoe Monroe's loyalty and how she didn't know if she would have survived without her bravery when she herself felt weak shortly after they were sent to Earth. Bellamy helped her lay her friend to rest.
Jack Scanlan stepped out of the crowd next and a deafening silence fell over the onlookers. He stood next to his son's body, his eyes rimmed red, his voice strained as he said, "My son was curious about this earth, always wanting to go out and explore. I told him it was too dangerous out there for him on his own, he was only twelve. I guess I didn't know that the danger was at home all along." Scanlan hopped down into the grave and gathered his son into his arms, lowering the small body to the dirt.
When he returned to the crowd, Kane and Bellamy walked toward the bodies of the four men who had fought against them. As they began to lower the first body into the ground, Kane noticed that most of the crowd had dispersed. His eyes met Abby's and she gave him a sad smile. He returned it and bend over, adjusting Shawn Gillmer's body before moving onto Mike Bogdanovic.
"How is he?" Kane asked, finding Abby in Medical after, examining Jasper Jordan. She had left as soon as he and Bellamy had lowered the last body — Abbot Simon — into his grave. They had spent the last hour shoveling the dirt back into the graves with the help of Nate, Sinclair, Jones, Jeff, Harper, and Scanlan.
She glanced over her shoulder at him and frowned. "He's still unresponsive. I don't know what to do for him, Marcus."
Kane nodded slowly and stepped next to Jasper's bed. He stared down at the boy — at the deep bruises on his face, at his arm in the sling, at the bandages that covered his torso, at his broken leg sticking out from under the blankets. He felt Abby's hand on his arm, squeezing gently. Her touch was what pushed him over the edge.
The tears stung his eyes and he collapsed into the chair he assumed had been Harper's bed for the past few days. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, putting his head in his hands to hide his grief. Abby's arms wrapped around his chest, her head coming to rest on his shoulder, as she whispered, "This wasn't your fault, Marcus. This was Pike."
He shook his head, letting his shoulders shake as he held back his sobs. "Abby, he was hurt because of me. I antagonized Pike, I made it worse. He was going to kill Jasper because I pissed him off, because I wouldn't give up your location."
"It's okay, ai niron," she whispered, squeezing her arms around him. Her lips brushed against his neck and his hand came up to grip her forearm tight, needing to keep himself grounded.
"I don't know how I'll be able to make it up to him," he said, lifting his head to look at Jasper, at the steady rise and fall of his chest that was only happening because the machine next to him was breathing for him.
"We all make mistakes, I'm sure whatever you did to antagonize Pike is forgivable." She said as she kissed along his neck.
"I head-butted him, he was pissing me off," Kane whispered, feeling the heat rise on his cheeks.
Her lips pursed, holding in a laugh. "You know Jasper appreciated that until it backfired."
He nodded and turned to look at her, taking her hand in his. She smiled gently at him and leaned down, pressing a kiss to his forehead. She whispered, "Jasper will forgive you, let's just get him to wake up first, okay? I need Nyko."
"Okay," he said, nodding.
"Now, I want you to go home and put a football match on. Take Benja," she said, pulling him to his feet. He raised his eyebrows at her and she smiled as she leaned up, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. She murmured, "Doctor's orders. Go, Marcus."
Reviews are always welcomed and appreciated; I love hearing what you all have to say! :)
There's only one more chapter for this fic then the sequel. It's very bittersweet for me and I hope to get you the final chapter quickly.
-Lauren