Yo, sup. Sorry I haven't been uploadin' in a few days. My bad. Stupid writers block and plot bunnies. Well I've wrote 2 li'l oneshots and I'd really appreciate it if y'all would review them. They're kinda fluffy.
Remy woke up in a dark, greyish brick room with only a door in front of him. It was, like, steel or something. There was a small window, over him. There was also a little stereo playing Christmas music. Remy guessed the big dude who captured them was trying to torture them. He was on a small cot. On the far side of the room there was another cot with a female on it.
Rogue!
He ran over to her. She was so still and pale. Remy started to panic.
She was dead. She was dead. She was, like, totally completely pushing up dasies!
Remy started to hyperventalate. Or...however you spell that stupid word!
He started to tear up a little. He hadn't cried since BellaDonna told him she didn't love him. He grabbed her and held her, just like he'd always wanted to.
Even dead, she was beautiful. Her head fell limp on his arm.
He cried into her shoulder. Wait. Was that a pulse? Yes it was.
YAY! She wasn't dead! She just had a concusion...however you spell that stupid word as well.
He wiped his tears and looked completely normal. The good thing about his eyes(besides the fact that they are EXTREMLY hot) is that he didn't get red eyes after crying.
Well, he still wouldn't let her go. It felt so good for her to be in his arms. After a few minutes, she started to stir in her sleep and looked up at him with sleepy and confused eyes.
She then glared at him and smacked him and got up real fast. Remy watched and rubbed the sore spot on his face Rogue started to look so mad that if this were a cartoon, she'd have the red exagerated face and smoke coming out of her ears.
It was, in a weird and sadistic way, a very cute look for her, to Remy.
"What's wrong with yah!" She demanded.
"Many t'in's, chere. Many t'in's. But dat's 'side de point. Are y' okay?" He asked concerned.
Rogue snarled at him and got in his face.
"We jus' got captured bah Juggernaught an' yer askin' meh if Ah'm okay!"
Beat.
"Oui. An' dat's who captured us? I t'ough' dat it was Herculese wit' a helmet on." He said bluntly.
Rogue threw her hands up in the air.
"AGH!" She ended up strangling him. Yep, we're now caught up, kiddies!
Funny a moment ago, she was Snow White, now she was strangling him.
I hate my life, sometimes. But hey, if you look at the glass half full, she's holding me, in a way. Remy thought.
No, She ain't. Now lemme finish, please.
Can I ask you something, Remy mentally asked WC.
What?
How come I'm the only one that can hear you? he asked
Deadpool hears me too. Well, that's cuz I don't allow anyone else to hear me. Duh.
Well anywho, Rogue was chocking Remy and it hurt alot. Like, alot, alot.
"Chere-"
"Don't 'chere' meh, Cajun! It's all yer fault!"
"Mias, I didn' know who Juggernaut was!"
"So yer sayin' that yah didn't find him suspicious in any way?" "exactment.""Not his size, the fact that he was wearin' a battlesuit an' a helmet, or the way he said 'where is she'?" He shook his head. "Okay, that'd explain why yah said 'Rogue, oh she's BEHIND THA CONTAH!'" She was fuming and Remy seemed unfazed.
"Yer cute when angry."
"AH! YER HOPELESS!"
She floped onto the cot when another song came on the stereo.
"Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next da- BOOM!"
Rogue didn't move from her spot, the only thing that changed about her position was her extened arm holding a pistol. This made Remy a little nervous.
"Uh, why do y' have a gun."
She looked at him, "Mah dinah gets hasseled by mutant haters." Then her head fell. "Ah hate Taylor Swift."
"I can tell," Remy said slowly. "So, can I ask why Juggernaught wanted to kidnap y'?"
Remy heard a muffled sigh as she lifted her head, ungraciously. Didn't she just had a blissfull, concusion made sleep?
"Last year, we fought him an' Ah absorbed him an' then Bobby froze him into some lake over a dam. Ah can't really 'member where it was."
She sat up, then. She looked at him. He looked at her.
"But I ain't Bobby." He said simply.
"Ah know, maybe he thinks Bobby grew up or somethin'."
Remy was suddenly insulted.
"Dat hurts! I look not'in' like dat ingrade!"
Rogue laughed a little. She was about to say something but was cut off by some morbid singing.
"One, two, Juggy's comin' for you,
Three, four, better lock the door.
Five, six, grab your cru-sa-fix,
Seven, eight, gonna stay up late.
Nine, Ten, never sleep again,
Elevin, twelve, Meet the merc from hell."
Wait, Juggy and the last verse weren't in the song...Odd, even so, Remy was kinda creeped.
"Lucy! I HOME!" Someone yelled behind the door. He knocked.
Rogue got up slowly and cautiously. Another series of knocks.
Tap-ta-ta-tap-tap
Rogue got to the door and tapped.
Tap-Tap
The weird guy behind the door cheered.
"Bravo! Encore!"
Then the little slide revealed red and black masked eyes.
"Yo! Your boyfriend still alive?" He asked.
Remy then relized who it was and groaned.
"Yeah, Wade, 'm alive!" Remy called out.
Rogue shot him a confused look. And mouthed the words "Wade?".
"Hey, Rems-ma man! Sorry 'bout capturin' you and your girl-"
"AH AIN'T HIS GIRLFRIEND!" Rogue yelled.
"De-Nile ain't justa river in Eygpt."Wade called out to Rogue. Rogue threw the remains of the radio at door with a huge "THUNK!"
"Fiesty ain't she, Rems? I like her! Well-Wait...What do you mean I should shut up, WC! What do you mean I'm gettin' on your nerves? What do you mean stop repeating everything you say?"
Remy smiled, knowing I was giving Wade a hard time.
Shut up, or you're next, Rems.
"Yes ma'am." Remy said solemly.
"Who are y'all talkin' to!" Rogue yelled.
Wade looked at Remy.
"You hear her too!" Remy nodded.
"Yay! Now I'm not completely insane!"
"M' eit'er!"
YOU'RE BOTH INSANE!
"Hey, WC, can I ask ya a questiononee!" Wade asked.
That's not even a real word, but I'm guessing you mean question. Fine what is it Wade?
"Ok, for me an' Rems chappies, how 'bout we have it first person? Like from our point of views?" He asked.
"We're not in a story, are we?" Remy asked
I'm gonna choose to ignore that question and reasure you with telling you I'm kinda like a telepath, but totally not one. M'kay? But why should I make y'all so important? What about Rogue?
"She can' hear y', petite." Remy answered simply.
She looked at him incrediously.
"Hear who!" She started to pull her hair and landed on the cot. "Ah'm surrounded bah retards!"
Hmmmm you do raise a good point. Well what's in it for me...
Wade answered imediatly "I'll assinate Taylor Swift!"
Wade, you're in! Remy...
Remy thought for a moment.
"Aha! I'll taka off my shirt!"
DEAL!
Remy's POV
I smiled and fist pumped. Even though I ain't real, it's feels good to win.
Rogue looked at me like I was some maniac.
"Y' okay, chere?" I asked.
She looked at me up and down.
"Are yah feelin' ok?" She asked.
I quirked an eyebrow. "Yeah...Why?"
If her eyebrows raised any higher, they'd have been lost in her hair.
"Yer talkin' to yerself an' answerin' back..."
Oh riiiiiiight. She can't hear ya, WC.
Duh, we all know this, now go back to swoonin' her, Cajun. And get on with the story.
Yes, ma'am.
"So, Wade, what're y' doin' here?"
The bolted shut door opened and a dude in a guady red and black suit was shown, aka Wade.
"Hey, it's not that guady, is it?" Wade said as he looked down self-consiously.
"Yeah, a li'l." I said. I went up and hugged the man, 'cuz he'd gotten me outta a lot jams.
"Meanie." He said.
"'M de meanie? Y've kidnapped us!" I punched his arm.
"Well, I was told to, like, kidnap some kids or something. But then I didn't wanna so I got you, but you're notta kid, but she's-" He stopped and looked at Roguey.
"What?" She asked.
"Yer hot. Say, are you single?" Wade asked.
Ok, I know that he's my friend and that Rogue would soooo not go for him, but I still got VERY jealous and angery.
"Wade, can I talk to y'?" I asked as I gritted my teeth.
"Sure thing, be back in a second senorita!"
Rogue shuddered.
I puched him harder.
"WHAT DO Y' T'INK YER DOIN'!" I whisper shouted.
"Flirting." He said. "And why is this from your point of view?"
I rolled my eyes. "WC likes me more."
"No she loves me."
"Nu-uh!"
"Yeah-huh!"
"D'accord, le's settle dis. WC, who's better!"
Um...Whitechocolate14 isn't here right now leave a message after the beep. BEEEEEEEEEP!
We both grumbled.
"Well, jus' stop flirtin' wit' ma chere, 'kay?" I told him.
"But she don't like you?"
"Oh, she will. She will!" I yelled.
Koff koff Only cuz I write it that way koff koff
What?
Oh, I didn't say anything.
UGH! YER SO DIFFICULT!
No I'm not, but we need to hurry this along.
Fine. Guess we'll end it here due to your stupid writers block and lack of sugar?
Yep.