34 - The Calm

EPOV

I was fucking pissed.

I was so fucking pissed that I was about two seconds from hunting that bitch down and forcing her to tell me what she was doing and why she was doing it. She was fucking with my life, but what was even worse was that she was fucking with Bella's and Charlie's lives. Of course, there was nothing we could do about it because she was claiming to be a victim. What? Were they fucking kidding me?

I didn't buy it for a motherfucking minute. There was no doubt in my mind that she and James had been screwing at the time. She was obviously lying to the Chief about that. She had practically tried throwing it in my face, saying that if I wasn't careful she was going to move on to someone who appreciated her. I told her that if she was so unhappy with what we had to just fucking go. Then she told me that he couldn't do to her what I could.

I was fully willing to take responsibility for being an asshole to her. Regardless of the fact that it was the nature of our relationship, I should have put an end to it long before I did. Now she had involved my family and I was on the fucking war path.

"This is bullshit!" I yelled as I paced around our bedroom after Charlie had gone to sleep.

"Shhh," Bella hissed, taking off her shoes. "If you wake him up again you're going to have to just bottle that crap right back up while I get him back down."

I growled and ran my hands through my hair. "I'm just frustrated."

"And screaming about it is going to solve that problem?"

"No, but fuck, Bella I don't like not knowing what's going on."

"You know more than you did yesterday. At least you figured out who this James guy is."

"Yeah, but how did that help us? Where does that put us now?"

Bella flopped backwards and stretched her arms above her head. "I don't know," she sighed.

"I mean, if he's all up in her shit, then why does either one of them care about you?"

"Thanks," she scoffed.

"You know that's not what I mean, baby. I'm just trying to put it all together."

"Did you screw his sister?" Bella asked bluntly.

"What?"

"Or his girlfriend?"

Shit, I hate talking about this stuff with her.

"I . . . no."

Bella sat up, resting her hands in her lap. "You don't sound too sure, Edward."

"Christ, Bella, can we stop talking about this?"

"I'm not trying to piss you off," she said, shaking her head. "I'm trying to help you figure it out."

I sat down next to her, resting my head in my hands. "I don't know. Okay? I don't fucking know what I did to him. I slept with girls who had boyfriends, yes, but this guy never hit my radar as a jealous lover. And it was usually pretty vital to me to know who's fist had my name on it," I added.

I felt her hand rest on my back and her head on my shoulder.

"I'll figure it out, baby. I promise," I said, putting my hand on the side of her head.

"I know you will," she murmured.

We finished getting ready for bed and cuddled up together to watch some television.

Her cheek was resting against my bare chest and she yawned before letting out a heavy sigh.

"What are you thinking about," I asked, kissing the top of her head.

"Nothing," she mumbled, pressing her lips against my skin.

I tilted her chin up slightly so that I could see her eyes. "I don't believe you. Tell me what's wrong."

She took a deep breath. "I'm just tired of this. I'm tired of it all. I don't want to be afraid. I don't want to constantly be worrying about who's watching me or following me. I just wish I didn't have to think about it. Whatever you did couldn't be bad enough for him to be doing what he's doing, right? I mean, you didn't kill anyone did you? Like in that movie I Know What You Did Last Summer?"

My chest vibrated in amusement. "My driving record is spotless and as far as I know my homicide record is as well, reckless or otherwise."

"I'm joking, Edward, but I'm not. I can't live like this."

"They'll catch him, Bella. He can't be as smart as he thinks he is. He's already put himself in a position where you could identify him. It 'sonly a matter of time."

"You have a lot a baggage, you know that?" she said in a voice that was just barely above a whisper.

I swallowed and nodded. "Yup, I do."

We continued to watch Grey's Anatomy until the credit rolled. Bella snuggled into me.

"I love you," she said against my shoulder.

"More than anything, baby," I replied, squeezing her tightly.

XXXXXX

Friday, Bella and I took Charlie to school and officially changed his name on their records. The director looked at us oddly, but I didn't care. It was none of her business why we had changed his name. I was just excited that there was one more place that he was officially mine. We also sent in the documents to have it changed on his social security card. I didn't have to return to the clinic until Monday so we decided to run to Costco and do some other errands. My mom had given me a list of things that she needed for Carlisle's upcoming birthday and Bella liked to stock up on mega boxes of snack foods for Charlie.

"What am I going to do when you go back to work and Charlie's in school?" Bella pouted as we pushed the giant cart through the warehouse.

I hadn't really thought about the fact that she wouldn't be returning to work too.

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

"I want to feel useful."

I looked at her face and saw her frowning.

"Have you thought about going through UW and finding another research job?"

"Yeah, cause that worked out so well the first time," she huffed.

"Look at it this way, what are the chances that it happens again?" I was trying to lighten up the mood, but even I couldn't laugh at myself.

"I already tried that back in November. There aren't any that are close enough. I'd have to travel to Seattle or Tacoma two to three days a week."

I hummed. "What about something temporary. Something flexible that will allow you to work the hours Charlie's in school."

"Like what?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. A bookstore, a boutique? Or I'm sure my mom could use some help. She said something not too long ago about needing someone to go to project sites with her."

"I'm not a designer, Edward," Bella said glumly.

"I know you're not. I don't think she's looking for a designer, more of like an assistant."

We were quiet for a little while just putting things in the cart and walking side by side.

"And you need to study for the GRE," I finally said, breaking the silence. "You don't need to work, why don't you take the time to study?"

Bella looked at me her nose wrinkled. "You want me to study six hours a day three days a week?"

I laughed. "I want you to do what makes you happy, but yeah, I would like you to focus on yourself for once."

She rolled her eyes, but I could see her thinking. It wasn't entirely unreasonable. For the three months before I took the MCAT, I studied every waking second that I wasn't in class or sleeping. I never went out, I rarely got laid and I didn't see my family at all unless they came to me.

"It's just like doing research, baby. You've been out of school for almost eight months and there's no way you'll be able to study when Charlie and I are home."

"That's actually not such a bad idea," she acquiesced.

"You can do some research on Psych programs too; see what's out there."

She nodded pensively and we kept filling our cart.

An hour and four hundred dollars later, we finished up our Costco trip and headed back to the apartment to put it all away. I managed to get all the frozen stuff put away before she practically jumped me.

"This is the last day we have to mess around in the middle of the day, wherever we want," she panted, unbuttoning my pants and sliding down my body.

"You don't have to . . . oh, fuck. . ." I groaned as her mouth enveloped me. "You don't have to explain to me."

She hummed and I jumped a little at the sensation. It felt amazing.

I am seriously the luckiest motherfucker on the planet.

Before I could finish, I laid her out on the kitchen floor. I took her pretty hard. So hard, in fact that I'm pretty sure she had tile burn on her ass. That's possible, right?

As usual, I worried that I was too rough with Bella. Worried that I'd hurt her, worried that she'd have some post traumatic flashback. But she never did. She liked it rough. Not all the time, but I could usually tell what she needed and gave it to her readily. This time it was playful rough. The kind when we couldn't look each other in the eye without laughing.

We didn't even get all of our clothes off. Bella's shirt was up around her neck, her bra pulled down around her ribcage, and her pants and panties were only halfway on. One leg was completely free, but I just couldn't be bothered to remove them completely so they were tangled up around her right knee.

I had gotten my shirt off, but my pants were still almost entirely on, pushed down enough so that I could get inside of her. I still had my shoes on and it would have taken up too much time to get everything off, so I didn't. The shoes provided good leverage. So good, in fact, that on one particularly enthusiastic thrust we slid across the floor so fast, her head slammed into the base of the cabinet.

Once I made sure she was okay, we both broke out into hysterics and I almost had to stop what I was doing until we could focus. Almost.

"Fuck, you're crazy," I gasped, hovering over her and not wanting to leave her body a second before I actually needed to.

She giggled. "I'm trying to keep it interesting."

I laughed. "You're doing a great job. How's your head?"

"Fine, how's yours?" She smirked and then wiggled her hips indicating which head she was talking about.

"Very satisfied . . . at the moment," I teased.

I grabbed my t-shirt, using it to clean up the mess as I pulled out of her.

"Ewww," she whined as I dripped a little.

"Sorry," I smiled, ducking my head and standing up. I helped her to her feet and she pulled her pants all the way off.

"I'm going to go clean myself up. Will you finish putting the groceries away?"

I nodded and smacked her ass, making her yelp.

On the way to pick up Charlie, we stopped by Carlisle's attorney's office. I had e-mailed him to ask what needed to be done to set up wills as well as a trust for Charlie. His response had been almost instant. Apparently it was fairly easy . . . in theory. We just needed to fill out the paperwork and have it all notarized. I was also planning on setting up an account for Bella just in case something happened to me. In the case of my death, she would inherit everything that I hadn't designated to go to Charlie's trust fund. She didn't know that was my intention and I wasn't looking forward to having that discussion with her either. I considered just keeping it a secret, but if she did find out, I'd be in even more trouble. It was better just to bite the bullet.

Carlisle got home at three and Mom showed up at five, dragging Alice with her. They hadn't even gotten into the house before we descended on them.

"Auntie Awice, I'm a Cuwen just wike my daddy," Charlie chirped, jumping into her arms.

"I know," she grinned. "That's my name too."

"It is?" Charlie asked, wide eyed.

"Well, for now. When I marry Uncle Jasper it will be Whitlock."

"Whipwock?"

I snorted. "He sounds like that dude from Earth Girls Are Easy. The guy Jim Carey played."

Bella backhanded me in the chest, but she was laughing too. It was funny.

Alice frowned at me and stuck out her tongue before turning back to my son. "Yup, Whitlock," she nodded. She carried him inside and they disappeared. Bella followed. I grabbed my mom's bag from her and swung my arm over her shoulders.

"Ma, can you guys look after Charlie while Bella and I work on some stuff?" I asked, kissing the side of her.

"Of course, sweetheart. What kind of stuff are you working on? Or is it none of my business?" I saw a glint in her eye and the corner of her mouth twitch. The women was impossible.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "Bella was freaking out on the plane about wills and guardianship plans," I explained.

"Oh," Mom gasped a little. "Wow."

"Did you have that for us when we were little?"

"Yes, of course. You had your trusts from Edward of course, but Carlisle and I set all the rest of that up when he adopted you."

"Who would have gotten us?" I asked, curiosity getting the better of me.

"At the time, my cousin Margaret. Up until you were fourteen. Then we changed it to Grandma Cullen."

"Cousin Maggie? Really? Whatever happened to her?"

My mom's face got a really sour expression. "She tried to seduce your father."

"What?" I laughed unintentionally. It's not that it was funny, it just took me off guard.

"Yes. You remember cousin Robbie's wedding right before your freshman year of high school?"

"Yeah," I nodded.

Emmett and I had gone around collecting all the abandoned glasses of alcohol and got ourselves pretty nicely buzzed that night.

"She got really drunk and trapped Carlisle in the bathroom. Let's just say that she thought she was giving him an offer that no man could refuse."

"I'm assuming he refused."

My mom scoffed. "Of course he did. In any case, after that we decided Grandma Cullen could care for you if anything happened."

"She was like ninety, Mom. She died when I was seventeen."

My mom laughed. "She was not ninety, Edward. She was sixty-five, my lord."

I shrugged and held open the door for her. Once everyone was settled, my parents and Alice disappeared with Charlie into the basement and Bella and I sat down at the island spreading the paperwork out in front of us.

About half hour later Alice appeared.

"What are you guys doing?" she asked, taking a soda out of the fridge.

"Wills," Bella grumbled.

"Wills? As in, I here do bequeath all my possessions, wills?"

"Sort of," I sighed. "More like who will care for Charlie if something happens to us. We're also setting up a trust for him and all that."

"Oh," she said quietly, popping the top of the can. "Um, so . . . who were you thinking would take care of him? I mean, if, God forbid, anything should happen?"

I glanced over at Bella. She bit her lip and nodded.

"We were actually going to ask you and Jasper if that's something you'd be willing to do."

Alice gaped at us. "Really?"

"Yeah," I confirmed. "You don't have to, but I just think. . . "

"OhmyGod," she interrupted. "No, um, I . . . I . . ." Alice was practically vibrating with energy. "I don't want to answer for Jazz, but. . . Oh, my God, really?"

Bella started laughing silently.

"Talk to Jasper about it, Allie," I grinned. "Maybe we can go out for dinner tomorrow night and discuss everything."

"Okay, yeah, that sounds good."

She bounded out of the room with her cell phone in hand. I looked over at Bella who now had her forehead against the table.

"You alright, baby?" I put my hand on her back and started rubbing circles.

"I don't want to think about all this. It's depressing," she moaned.

"Uh. . ."

"Shut-up, I know it was my idea. But it's freaking me out."

I blew out a loud puff of air. "I know it is, but we need to do it. Besides, I also need to make sure that if something happens to me that you are taken care of."

There, done. I said it. Brace yourself, Cullen.

Bella lifted her head. "Nuh uh, you're not allowed to go anywhere."

"I don't plan on it," I chuckled.

To my surprise, she left it there. She didn't argue with me at all.

I kissed the side of her mouth softly and felt her frown. I pulled back and looked at her unhappy face.

"Now what's the matter?"

Maybe I was wrong. This is where she's going to give me a hard time.

"Um, I don't have anything to leave you," she said quietly "I mean, financially."

I had to try really hard to hold back my snort. "I'm not worried about it, baby. I really don't need anything . . . financially'. This is all just a formality anyway."

I stood up and went to get a soda.

"Do you want one?"

Bella shook her head. She looked stressed out.

"Let's take a break," I said reaching for her hand and pulling her up. "Let's go downstairs and watch a movie with Charlie and my parents, or whatever they're doing down there."

She nodded, leaving the papers on the table and following me down into the basement where Carlisle was lying on the floor coloring with Charlie.

Mom was sitting on the sofa, her attention completely on the television. She was watching one of those cake making shows.

"I want to learn how to do that," she said excitedly. "I think I could. I have all sorts of ideas."

Bella's mood suddenly skyrocketed and she practically skipped over to the sofa, sitting down next to Mom and curling her feet up under her. "Oh, I want to do it too."

"We can learn together," my mom practically squealed. "Oh, I bet I could make one for Carlisle's birthday party."

I looked over to Carlisle who had been watching them as well. He turned his head, meeting my gaze before grinning widely and shaking his head.

"You'd think I was turning four, not forty-four," he laughed.

"Dude, Pops, you're really gonna be that old?" I smirked at him. "You might as well buy yourself a walker and join the AARP."

I heard my mom scoff and turned to face her. She was glaring at me. Bella's eyes widened and I was startled when Carlisle bowled into me, knocking me to the ground with a thud.

"Oof," I grunted.

"Call me old again, son," he said towering over me, his foot resting on my stomach.

"You're old," I laugh-shouted. "Old, old, old. Owwwww!" I cried out as Carlisle increased his pressure on my stomach. Charlie was watching with wide eyes and a curious smile.

"What was that? I'm sorry I didn't hear you," Carlisle said loudly.

"See, first sign of old age, Dad. Hearing loss."

Carlisle started laughing. "I give up."

He held out his hand for me and helped me up. I swung my arm around him. "Don't worry, Dad, I promise I'm in the process of finding a very good old folks home for you and Mom."

"You watch your mouth Edward Anthony Cullen," my mom yelled, right as Carlisle pinched my side.

"Ouch!" I jumped. "I'm kidding, sheesh."

Carlisle pushed me away and went back to Charlie.

I laughed and flopped down next to them, grabbing a crayon and grinning at my son who was still kind of gaping at me. His eyes darting between me and Carlisle.

"Papa and daddy were just playing around," Bella said gently.

I ruffled his hair. "I was just teasing Papa," I chuckled.

"Cause he's owd?"

"Ha!" I snorted. "Yeah, buddy, 'cause he's old."

Carlisle scowled at me and then looked at my son. "I'm not old, Charlie. I'm just a grown-up, unlike your daddy."

I snickered and started coloring in the Spiderman book that Charlie was working on.

Alice joined us about twenty minutes later.

"Jazz is on his way over. He says he's up for dinner tomorrow night."

"Cool," I said, not looking up at her.

"We can't babysit tomorrow night," my mom announced. "One of my clients is throwing a party and I need to be there."

"That's fine, we'll just take him with us."

"No, we won't," Bella said making me look up at her.

"Why?"

"Not exactly kid friendly discussion, Edward. Alice, can you guys come over for dinner instead and then we can talk after he goes to bed?"

"Yeah, of course," Alice said looking between Bella and me.

I opened my mouth to respond to Bella, but Carlisle nudged me and shook his head. I looked over at Charlie who was doing that head tilting thing. Little bugger was listening to every word we said.

"So, how is it that you have a better social life than we do?" I asked Carlisle, slightly disturbed by the fact.

"We've paid our dues, son. Do you know how many functions we couldn't attend because we couldn't find a babysitter or because one of you was sick?"

"Or all three of you?"

"Oh, yeah," Carlisle nodded. "Do you remember that time we were supposed to go to that benefit for pediatric AIDS in Seattle? We figured we'd make a weekend out of it and got a babysitter who was willing to look after you all night. We got two suites and were all dressed and ready to go."

I frowned. I remembered that trip. I glanced at Alice who was turning pink with embarrassment.

"What happened?" Bella asked anxiously.

My mom made eye contact with me and smirked. "I went to hug Edward goodbye. . ."

"Oh, mom, please don't," I begged.

"What?" Bella shouted.

"He threw up all over my gorgeous navy blue silk Versace dress."

Bella's mouth fell open.

I groaned.

"And then he was followed by Alice and Emmett. Luckily, they missed me. We decided not to go, gave the babysitter our suite and tended to all three kids who were one hundred percent better by the time they woke up in the morning. Meanwhile, Carlisle and I hadn't slept a wink."

"Oh, shit," Bella laughed.

"It wasn't my fault, I was ten!" I protested.

"Me too," Alice squealed.

"Were you able to save the dress?" Bella asked.

Mom shook her head. "I sent it down to the hotel dry cleaning and they cleaned it up pretty well, but if you looked real closely you could tell. I ended up donating it."

Essentially, that's how the rest of the night progressed. Mom and Carlisle telling embarrassing stories and me trying to ignore them by spending quality coloring time with Charlie.

XXXXXX

The next evening Alice and Jasper showed up with appetizers and salad in hand for dinner at our place. Bella made baked chicken with asparagus, which Charlie absolutely refused to eat. I snickered at the horrified look on his face when he smelled it and Bella pinched my leg.

"Baby, just try it," she begged.

"I don't wike it," he shook his head.

"You haven't even tried it."

"I don't wike it."

"Bella, it's asparagus. I don't know a kid on this planet that likes asparagus."

"You're not helping," she sang sarcastically. "Charlie?"

She put his fork up to his mouth and he pursed his lips together tightly.

"Okay," she sighed dropping the fork with a clank.

Charlie grimaced and picked his fork up using his hand to rid it of the offending vegetable before stabbing a piece of chicken and shoving it into his mouth.

After dinner, Bella and Alice gave Charlie a bath and got him ready for bed while I shot the shit with Jasper.

"When are you gonna come see the house?" Jasper asked, taking a swig of beer.

"I've seen it," I told him.

"Not since we did all the changes."

Had we really not been to their house since they decorated?

"Dude, seriously. We're not inviting ourselves over, just say the word and we're there."

He nodded. "I'll talk to Allie and see when's a good time."

"How's all the wedding shit going?"

Jasper shrugged. "No idea. Allie talks and talks and talks about it, but until she sets a date, it just doesn't stick for me."

I laughed. "Isn't that something you two should do together? The date and all that?"

"I've already told her that I don't care. I just want to marry her, man. If she said tomorrow that she wanted to go to city hall tomorrow, I'd be there."

"Tomorrow's Sunday," I deadpanned.

Jazz punched my shoulder. "Shut-up fucker, you know what I'm sayin'."

"I do," I nodded.

I sat there thinking about telling Jasper my plans to ask Bella to marry me. It wasn't that long ago that he was in my position. But they had been together for years. Even with their break-up, they had way more time together than Bella and I did.

"You gonna suck it up and ask her?" Jasper asked, startling me from my thoughts.

"What?"

How the fuck did he know what I was thinking?

"Bella." he laughed, shaking his head. "Brother, don't even try and deny that you're thinking about marrying that woman."

I looked around making sure that she wasn't anywhere in the vicinity. I could hear a faint murmur of voices from down the hallway.

"I almost did. On New Year's."

"Why didn't you?"

"Cause we were both fucking drunk."

"So?"

"I want to do it right, Jazz. I want us both to be completely sober so that she knows I'm serious. I want to ask the chief's permission."

He snorted. "Good luck with that one."

"Thanks," I mumbled. "You think he's gonna say no?"

"Are you not gonna ask her if he does?"

I sighed. "No. I'll still ask her."

"Then it doesn't matter. I don't know what the chief's gonna say, Ed. The man hated you with a passion, but. . . .but I don't think he does anymore. I actually think he kinda likes you."

"I hope so."

Jasper and I lightened up our discussion until the girls got back.

"He's so freaking cute, Bella. How do you ever discipline him?" Alice asked as they came into the living room.

Bella giggled. "I'm lucky he's a good kid. For the most part, I don't have to really discipline him. He knows the rules and when he forgets I remind him. But trust me, there are times where I honestly wonder where the hell I went wrong."

"No, that little angel doesn't throw temper tantrums," Alice scoffed.

"Oh yes, he does," I pitched. "He may not throw them often, but when he does, they are fucking spectacular."

"On that note," Bella said. "Let's talk business."

We all kind of sagged. Guardianship of Charlie with anyone other than Bella and I was not something that any of us really wanted to think about.

We spent the next half hour going over things. We'd have to sign everything in front of a notary. Luckily, the attorney's secretary happened to be one and we could all meet up at the office early in the week.

Once it was all finished, we sat and drank, laughed and basically just hung out. Jasper and Alice decided to stay at my parent's house since they both had been drinking; at about two a.m. we said goodnight.

XXXXX

"Bella, slow down," I groaned.

"I can't," she panted.

"You're going to wear yourself out."

"Shut-up, I need to concentrate. What's the matter, can't keep up?" she teased.

Oh, she is so going to get it.

I sped up to match her pace. "Where is all this energy coming from?"

"I don't know," she laughed. "I'm all worked up."

"About what?"

"Stop talking to me, I can barely breathe."

"Then. Slow. Down."

Bella halted abruptly.

"I didn't mean stop," I protested. "Come on, I can't just stop."

"Nope, I'm done."

"Beeeelllla!" I whined.

God, I sound like Charlie.

"I feel much more relaxed now, thank you, baby," she smiled kissing me.

She began walking away from me back towards the house.

"That's the last time I take you out for a run," I yelled as I watched her ass sway dramatically.

I didn't know exactly what had gotten into her. I think it was from being cooped up in the house all week. On Monday, we'd met Alice and Jasper at the attorney's office and got all of our legal documents notarized before heading to lunch with them.

That was the last time I think she went anywhere. The weather had been horrible, making it way too cold for her and Charlie to get out on the days he wasn't in school. I came home from work on Thursday afternoon to find the apartment in ruins. Well, nearly. There were blankets spread from one end of the living room to the other, draping over furniture, lamps, even tacked to the fucking wall.

There were pots and pans all over the kitchen floor and a trail of toys starting into the living room and disappearing down the hallway.

"Bella?" I called out.

"Shhh," she said, poking her head out from the blankets.

"Why?"

She pulled the covers back even further to show me a passed out little boy curled up into her side.

"Fuck, he's asleep? How long's he been asleep?"

"Twenty minutes. We were reading The Cat in the Hat. I looked down and he was out."

"He's gonna be up all night. Are you going to stay up with him?"

"He's been running me ragged all fucking day, Edward. I just needed a half hour of silence."

I turned away and started picking some of the shit up off the floor, which only pissed her off. I couldn't fucking win.

She was a little better on Friday because she spent the day with my mom and sister getting ready for Carlisle's birthday. They were having a pretty big party and my mom and Bella really were trying one of those fancy cakes.

But on Saturday morning, the day of the party, she woke up agitated again so I suggested she take a run with me. The freeze had finally let up and even though it was still cold, it was dry and nice to get out. Charlie practically flew to the main house when I told him he was going to help Gramma with some last minute baking. The kid loved to cook.

Bella ran practically full speed for about fifteen minutes. She may have been little, but she was fast. And then she just stopped. My muscles protested. I was ready to stretch them out, but
I couldn't very well let her go on her own. We were two miles from the house and James had been on my mind lately. A lot. Fucker was gonna try something. He'd been invisible for far too long.

And Tanya? Bitch was crazy. I'd spotted her in Port Angeles twice during the week. The first time she was standing outside a coffee shop smoking a cigarette. The second, she was coming out of the WalMart and appeared to be yelling at someone on her cell phone. Both times, I was in my car on my way home so I couldn't really stop and confront her.

Or take her out.

Besides, both Carlisle and Chief Swan had suggested that I avoid her if at all possible. I had to agree with them. It was obvious she wasn't afraid of lying and the last thing I wanted was for her to go and make some accusation that I had assaulted her.

I ran back, catching up with Bella easily. "Can we at least jog back to the house?"

She nodded and we went at a much more leisurely pace all the way home.

I let Bella shower alone so she could go finish helping with set-up. I needed a few minutes to myself anyway. I was going to ask Chief Swan for his blessing to marry his daughter and I was fucking nervous.

As the day progressed, the knot in my stomach didn't get any better. Jasper and I ran last minute errands for my mother and he tried to take my mind off of it by telling me about some asshole in his office who was caught fucking the secretary on the boss's desk afterhours. I laughed and shook my head in the right places, but I couldn't quite push past the anxiety I was feeling.

I found myself wishing that Jasper could transfer some of his calm to me. Motherfucker was always laid back.

I momentarily forgot it all though when we returned to the house. My girl was sitting on the sofa, with our son in her lap. She was talking to him quietly and smiling. I watched as he put his finger up his nose and chuckled as Bella pulled it out, wrinkling her nose and shaking her head.

She must have heard me, because her head turned. Our gazes met and she flashed me a brilliant grin. My heart sped up, beating wildly in my chest just from one simple smile. Only Bella could do that to me. She was the only girl in my life that had ever elicited that reaction. And yet, even though my body was responding to her, my mind felt clear and relaxed for the first time in hours. She was my calm.

I grinned back and then let my mother drag me and the bags I was holding into the kitchen.

People began arriving shortly after four. I barely even got a chance to see my girl. She was flitting around the room saying hello to people; talking, laughing. No sign of the wound up woman she'd been for the last several days.

Carlisle walked around with Charlie attached to his hip for a while, introducing his 'grandson' to all of his colleagues and friends. None of them looked surprised, indicating that he had already told them, but I did see a few curious glances my way. There were pats on my back and several 'You've got a beautiful family's.

I saw Alice and Bella sneak a couple of shots at the bar that had been temporarily resurrected in the living room. Bella's cheeks pinked up from either the alcohol or the fact that she had been caught. She winked at me before setting her glass back down.

I sat down in a chair, watching all the people around me talking and laughing. I was going to miss it. The family get-togethers for birthdays or just for the hell of it. I could only imagine how Bella felt. She'd never really had that and now we were going to be leaving it behind voluntarily.

I knew it was going to be difficult, us being on our own. But unlike Bella, I'd never learned to be independent. Not truly independent. I'd never lived more than twenty minutes from my parents. Eventually, I wanted to settle close to them so Bella and I could raise our family; a big one; with them by our side, but first we needed to make a break. My parents had done it. Rose and Emmett had done it. Even Jasper and Alice had spent the summer after their reunion in New York, finding themselves as a couple again.

Chief Swan sat down next to me. "You look like you're thinking awfully hard," he chuckled.

I looked up and smiled. This was my opportunity. The man was here and in a good mood. I took a quick sweep of the room and saw Jasper who gave me sly thumbs up.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Yeah, uh, I sort of am."

He lifted his eyebrow at me waiting for me to elaborate.

I guess it's now or never.

I looked down at my hands and began twiddling my thumbs. "Um. . . Uh, I'd . . . I'd like to ask Bella to marry me," I said quietly.

When he didn't respond, I was forced to look up at him.

He was staring at me, making me even more nervous than I already was.

"Chief?"

"What?"

"Um. . ." I was at a loss. He knew that I wanted to marry her. I couldn't imagine that this was entirely a surprise. I guess I just didn't expect the silence. He gave me a break though.

"Ask me properly, son," he said gruffly. "You cannot ask to marry my daughter without looking me in the eye."

Oh! Well shit!

I closed my eyes for a moment and when I opened them again was staring directly into his eyes.

"Sir, I'd like to have your blessing to ask Bella to marry me." It definitely came out more confident than I felt and I almost wanted to pat myself on the back. Not that I wasn't positive that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, but I was a little worried that her dad wasn't on the same page. That he wouldn't think that I had proved myself enough.

He nodded and I watched his moustache twitch. "Much better," he said. "Now, as for your request. . ."

I held my breath, waiting for his answer. I was going to ask her no matter what, but I really, really wanted the chief to support me. I couldn't pinpoint exactly when it happened, but I found that I really kind of craved his approval.

"You guys haven't been together that long."

"I realize that, Chief, but. . ."

"You really need to learn when to shut your mouth," he chuckled.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"I have no doubt in my mind that you love my daughter, Edward. Or that you love my grandson. If things had gone differently, I do believe that you and Bella would have already been married."

I nodded. He was probably right.

"You've come a long way, son." He rested his hand on my shoulder. "And you absolutely have my blessing to ask Bella to marry you."

I breathed out a long forceful breath and smiled.

"I can't guarantee she's gonna say yes though," he added, wiping the smile from my face. I glanced up at him again, slightly panicked. Was there really a chance she'd say no?

"Oh, relax. I'm just messing with you," he laughed.

"Not funny, Chief," I griped.

He held up his beer. "Cheers."

I clinked my bottle against his.

"Don't screw it up, son. Cause if you do, your ass is mine."

I chuckled nervously, knowing that he really wasn't kidding.

We sat together, silently watching the guests until the chief got up to go talk to Carlisle.

Next thing I knew, Bella landed in my lap.

"Why hello there," she giggled.

"You're drunk," I said, not hiding my amusement.

"Noooooo. I'm not," she said, shaking her head. "I'm just a tiny bit tiiiiipsy." Her eyes lit up as she started singing that Tik Tok song by Kesha.

"Oh really? You're not drunk?"

She shook her head and then nodded. "Wait, I don't know how to answer that."

"Don't worry about it," I grinned.

"What were you and my dad talking about?" she purred, stroking the hair at the nape of my neck.

"Nothing," I said a little bit too quickly.

Bella frowned. "Are you keeping secrets from me?"

I decided to distract her. I was keeping a secret from her, but for very good reason.

"Come on, baby, let's go see if Carlisle is ready to cut his cake."

"Ooooooh, cake. I love cake," she said, nearly falling off my lap. I caught her around the middle and lifted her up into my arms. She squealed, but stopped as I slid her down my body. I saw her shift and bite her lip, giving me a coy smile.

"Behave yourself," I whispered. "I don't think my parents would appreciate it if we disappeared for a quickie in the middle of Carlisle's party."

"They'd never even notice," she assured.

I set her down and kissed her nose. "Later, baby. Let's go get some cake."

"I love cake!" she yelped.

Yeah, she's drunk.

XXXXXXX

James POV

"Tanya, I don't like this," I growled, laying out a line. I bent down and inhaled.

"You're going to kill yourself one of these days," she sniped.

I shook my head, sniffed and wiped my nose. "What the fuck do you care?"

She glared at me. "I don't."

"Then lay the fuck off."

"What don't you like, James?" she asked.

"This plan. The one you seem to have all the answers for."

I'm pretty sure she was playing me. We both had our agendas, but I think she wasn't completely honest about what hers was.

We'd played this game for a long time. When I first started fucking her she had no idea why I'd singled her out. She thought she was just that beautiful. Pfft. Yeah, she was hot; and she was smart, but that's not why I wanted her. That soulless motherfucker deserved to feel pain and I was going to be the one to take him down.

"Just stick to the schedule, James and it'll all work out."

"Yeah, for you," I snorted. "You're going to end up getting my ass arrested."

"You're not going to get arrested."

"So why am I the one who has to lay low and you get to be out and about?"

"Because you got caught," she sneered. "I told you not to let her see you. Now they're looking for you. It's not my fault you're an idiot. "

I grabbed her and pulled her to me. I knew she wouldn't say no. She never said no. She needed me too much. She was like my own personal whore. Willing to pay with her body to make sure she got what she wanted.

I grinned at her. She rolled her eyes, but didn't fight me. She was a decent lay as long as I took control. She didn't know what to do for shit when she was on top. Like it was that fucking hard to bounce on my dick.

She couldn't keep my attention though. I wasn't a fucking cheater. We weren't together and she was fully aware of what and who I did. She even encouraged it. Like that fucking bartender chick.

I was supposed to play a role. A cheating boyfriend whose woman was threatening to take the kid. That was apparently what would get me a golden ticket. She had a type. T told me not to drink what she put in front of me if I wanted to remember any of it. Sick bitch was into date rape. I would have fucked her anyway, but whatever.

I did a line, smoked a bowl to counter the effects and fuck me up a little, and made my way into the bar with sob story ready. I got a safe drink from a male bartender and then the game began. She listened for a bit and then placed another drink in front of me. When she wasn't looking I dumped half it on the floor.

I played the part; went all droopy and stumbling, let her drive me home and take advantage of me. Pretended that I couldn't, shouldn't, wouldn't. I should have been a fucking actor.

I'm not usually one to eat unfamiliar pussy, but when she mentioned wanting to feel my beard between her thighs I found my motivation.

The girl knew how to fuck. And she fucked hard. I felt it only fair to reciprocate. Once or twice I thought she might have suspected that I was playing her, but she never said anything. As soon as she fell asleep I was out. I grabbed four fucking condoms off the floor, no need to leave behind any evidence. The chick was into fucking dudes with families; I had no idea what she'd do with my jizz if she had it.

T came to pick me up at a 24-hour coffee shop down the street about twenty minutes after I called her to come pick me up. She practically slapped me when I shoved one of the used rubbers in her face. She was fun to fuck with, but she did ban me from her bed for a good week, which was bullshit cause she was the one who pointed me in that direction.

When that girl turned up dead, I actually thought T had done it. I even asked her. She scoffed at me and said that the bitch's death was not part of her plan. I sent a silent prayer to the motherfucker who did it though. The whore deserved it. She wasn't any better than Cullen.

When I targeted Tanya, I didn't know the nature of her relationship with Cullen. I knew they had been together for a long time. I overheard her telling a friend that she was waiting for him to propose. They'd been together for over three years and it was just a matter of time. Like three years was a huge accomplishment.

It's so fucking easy to stalk people these days. All I had to do was follow her to class one day and sit next to her. There were easily a hundred and fifty kids in the class and nobody even knew I wasn't supposed to be there. I befriended her, tutored her. At first that's all it was. She began to open up to me; tell me about her fucked up relationship with the douchebag who fucked me over.

It really should have taken me longer to convince her that what she needed to do was show him that she could get her rocks off somewhere else too. That should have been my first clue that my plan was going to fail. I did everything I could. I sent her nasty, filthy texts, called her at all hours and even tried to set it up so that he'd walk in on us. But none of it worked.

And then Tanya went home for a few weeks and I tried to re-strategize. There had to be some way to get to him. But then it all fell apart. She showed up on my doorstep. The fucker had thrown her out; ended it completely.

I was furious. Raging. It was over. I'd never get my payback. I spent nearly a week on a bender, snorting blow, drinking cheap liquor and fucking the shit out of Tanya, who also spent the entire week drunk and crying. Unfortunately it was the first full week of fall classes.

When I finally made it to my classes, one of my professors confronted me. I didn't even think about it. I beat the shit out of him. I was arrested and thrown into jail for two months. Tanya came to visit me once, told me that she was going back to Washington and to come visit her when I got out.

I never thought I'd do it. I figured there was no reason anymore. But when I got out, there was nothing left for me in Boston either. I had been expelled, disowned, abandoned. Eight months after I was released I found myself on Tanya's doorstep in Tacoma.

I never did go back to school. I got arrested one more time for trying to steal a camera from a pawn shop, but I tried to keep my nose clean. Figuratively, not literally. I was still shoving every last dime I could get my hands on up my nose. Luckily Tanya came from money. She was my own personal sugar mama.

She didn't date. I don't know why. I didn't ask questions. I got a job in a chop shop and for several months Tanya and I lived together. I didn't share her bed, I slept on the couch. We had weeks where we fucked and weeks where we barely even spoke.

Until he came back. Tanya's friend Jessica, who was an excellent fuck by the way, came to the house squealing. He was back and had found out that he had knocked up some one night stand. I laughed my ass off. Served the fucker right.

Tanya wasn't so happy though. She was downright pissed actually. She became obsessed . . . again. She spent more and more time at her parents' house.

And then came the proposition. She laid out my job and promised I'd get my payback.

I was now balls deep in this scheme and as confident as I was in my ability, something was off. I'd done all my research this time. Cullen was definitely in love with this one and their kid meant everything to him.

I bent Tanya over and unzipped my pants. "You better not be fucking with me, T."

"Just do your fucking job and we'll never have to see each other again, okay?" she said through clenched teeth as I pushed into her.

"That's exactly what I'm counting on."