Hey guys! As you can see, I have fully read my entire story over again, and even though I was appalled at some chapters, I got through it, and I finally got motivated to write more! :) I was so excited to get that motivation back, and even though the story is at a pretty depressing part right now, I'm excited for the upcoming chapters. So, enough of this talk. Read. :D
"This . . . can't be happening."
I watch as Nudge grabs a tissue from her coffee table, wiping her spilling tears away. Iggy, Fang, and I are at Nudge's house, telling her about us moving to Houston. Originally, we were going to tell everyone all at once, but Iggy insisted we tell Nudge alone, which makes more sense. This will probably be hardest for her.
Iggy gently grabs her in a hug on the couch they're sitting on, and squeezes her, as she cries. His eyes are red, and I can see tears threatening to spill over.
My heart is breaking. It's almost as if my physical being is literally hurting.
Fang gives me a little squeeze, and I realize I'm shaking. In the back of my mind, I realize I'm supposed to be trying my new "positivity motto", but right now, I can't concentrate on it.
"I don't get it. Why does this have to happen?" Nudge murmurs from Iggy's embrace.
My voice is shaky. "N-nudge…You know why. Didn't you suspect it at least when we found out our mom died?"
She pulls away from Iggy and looks at me, her eyes glossy with tears. "I did, but I tried to deny it. I just couldn't imagine losing you two." She looks at me. "Max. You're my best friend." Her voice hitches on the last word.
I get up from the couch Fang and I are on, and I give her a huge hug. "I know, girl," I whisper. "And I love you." I stand up straight, bringing her up with me. "But this isn't the end, okay? We're just moving. We can talk all the time. Facebook, Instant Messaging, E-mail. Come on, we're lucky we live in this century." I smile.
She smiles a fraction, wiping her tears clean. "Yeah," she whispers. "I guess you're right."
Fang and I leave Iggy and Nudge alone while they work out relationship issues. As I think of that, my stomach knots up and I get a nervous pain there. I'm still worried about Fang and I's relationship. I squelch the thought, and push it to the back of my mind; I'll save that for when the time comes.
We spend the next hour telling the rest of our group of friends what's going on. J.J. and Ella immediately start crying and hugging me, making me feel oddly guilty and depressed at the same time. Ian and Kevin are most upset about Iggy, having been better friends with him, but they both show their condolences.
We got word from Margret, the social worker, that we're leaving in three days. It's a little longer than we thought, and that's good, but there is the part that we're moving 300 miles away from where we've been living our whole lives. Yeah. Just that.
Now, Mom's funeral is in a few hours, which makes me nervous. I'm not sure how many people are going to show up, besides my friends, but they're probably just her coworkers, which don't interest me at all. I don't even know these people. But, I'll just have to deal with it and try to get through the rest of this day.
I dress in a black blouse and some jeans, remembering the last conversation I had with my mom, nearly 3 days ago. She had said she loved me. I feel somehow satisfied, thinking of that; not because she's gone, but because I actually got to hear her say it to me before this. I smile sadly at the memory, tears in my eyes, wondering how different the situation might have been if we never made up.
Strangely, I'm almost thankful that the kidnapping happened to me, almost two months ago. If it hadn't happened, my mother and I wouldn't have made up, Sam would still be out there, probably still harassing me, and Bridget would still be in an abusive relationship with him. I don't think I've realized it till now, but I might actually be thankful for it, as crazy as that sounds.
When I'm done getting dressed and my hair's fixed, I walk to Fang's living room and sit on the couch next to Iggy. He's sitting with his head down, a miserable expression on his face, and I take his hand, squeezing it. Fang is there, sitting in the chair across from the couch, and I see him with a worried face, shaking his head at me. Uh oh. He must have had a really hard time saying goodbye to Nudge.
"What's up, Igs?" I ask gently. He looks at me with an annoyed expression on his face.
"Nothing," he says gruffly. He turns away from me on the couch.
I sigh. "Iggy, I know what you're going through. It's going to be okay." I try to grab his arm and twist him back to facing me, but he just shrugs me off.
He looks pissed. "Look," he says sharply. "I don't need any of your little pep talks right now. It's not going to help."
He gets up from the couch, and walks swiftly to our room, slamming the door shut. I stare at the empty couch space, taken aback. I guess I just wasn't expecting him to take emotion out on me like that.
Fang's body suddenly appears in that empty space, taking my hands.
"I somehow knew that wouldn't end well…" he says, while settling me down so that I'm leaning on him.
I sigh, nodding, only slightly insulted. "Yeah I guess his emotions are just all out of whack because of Nudge. And the fact that Mom's funeral is in an hour."
I see him shake his head, saddened. "Max, just promise me one thing."
I look up at him hesitantly and go,"What's that?"
"Just…don't lose your mind over there, okay? I can see Iggy is already being affected. I'm just worried about you guys."
"I know," I say. "I'm worried too."
Funerals. The epitome of all things fun. Yeah, because all the black wear, the caskets, and crying people just scream joy.
Okay, not so much. Funerals are actually one of the most hated things in my book. Of course, I've only been to about three in my lifetime, but just the feel of the place gives you a lasting depressed feeling.
Iggy and I are sitting with our friends in the tiny chapel of the funeral home. Iggy still hasn't said anything to me since he snapped at me earlier, which worries me to no end; we're going to need each other in a few days.
The chapel is fairly crowded, which surprises me a little. The only other people I know here are Fang's parents and our neighbors, the one's on the side opposite of Fang. Everyone else is from her work, I guess. It kind of makes me proud, though, that such a loved woman is my mother. Was. My eyes fill up with tears at that thought.
I feel a hand squeeze mine, and I look up, expecting to see Fang, but instead I see Iggy looking down at me, a grim expression on his face. He isn't crying, but he seems like he might at any moment. Nudge is latched onto his arm on his left and she's looking at me with a worried expression. I give her a reassuring smile to assure her I'm fine, but it comes out as a grimace, obviously not convincing her.
The funeral goes by in a blur. Fang holds my hand the whole time, but it's really gloomy, and the entire time, I just want to leave. The atmospheres in funerals are just too much for me to bear.
When the horrid even is finally over, I just want to get the heck to bed, and be done with the day, but Nudge, Ella, and J.J. come over to me before Iggy and I can get into Fang's car.
"Hey, Max," Nudge says gently, but with a smile on her face. J.J. and Ella are sort of grinning behind her, too. I wonder what they're thinking.
We stop in the parking lot and I look up at her with mild curiosity. "What?"
"Well . . . we were kind of wondering if you wanted to come over to my house for a last sleepover with the girls? Then tomorrow, our group of friends can have like a big fun day before you guys leave. I think it'll be fun!"
I do think it's a good idea, and I think it would help our gloomy moods, but I'm a little worried about Iggy being alone tonight. I look up at him, conflicted.
He gives me a reassuring grin and says, "You go and have fun. I'll be fine. Fang and I will have a sleepover!" He says with an overly-excited girl voice.
Fang looks mildly surprised, but quickly recovers and runs up behind Iggy throwing an arm around him in a bro-hug. "Yeah, we will!" He matches Iggy's voice.
We all crack up, even Iggy and I, and that's when I realize that Iggy and I are actually going to recover from this.
And that's it for today, folks. Please review and tell me what you think.
~Peace