36. Entwined

(began writing this before 2x16)

"You don't know what you're talking about!" she scoffed at him. How dare he try to set her up with Neal. She couldn't believe he was trying to do it again.

"Oh please, dearie, it's as plain on your face as words in a book," the last sound came out biting, and she flinched, but stood firm.

They were in the back of his shop, a few days after curing him. Neal had acclimated himself nicely, having Tamara move in without a hitch. Henry was loving having his father so near, and she could finally understand Regina's bitterness at being so quickly pushed aside. However, that's where her compassion ended for the other woman, reminding herself of the other things that set them far apart. The fact that everyone kept comparing them still rubbed her the wrong way.

Henry still hasn't smiled at her once since he found Neal.

But despite the fact that that side of this dysfunctional family was happy, Gold still felt the need to push her onto his son.

"Look, it's not going to happen. So would you back off?" This is what she got for being concerned about him. She had come to check on him, see if his injury was fully healed. She had been worried since Hook knocked her over, and this is how he repaid her. She could strangle him right now.

She didn't need him shoving her at Neal. She didn't want him too. Every time she even thought about the fact that they were now technically considered 'family', she could feel something crack within her chest. She didn't want to be reminded.

"But why, Miss Swan? Why deny yourself something that you obviously want and deserve?" he gestured with his hand theatrically and she found her eyes following each curve as it arched through the air.

No. She didn't want to be reminded at all.

"Because…because its none of your business! Why are you pushing this?" She finally exclaimed, throwing her arms up and walking straight up to him. He reared back, not expecting her to stand so close. She heard an intake of breath and wanted to smirk.

"Because, is it so hard to believe that I just want what's best for you?"

She shot him a look, her brow lifted high on her forehead. He nodded his head in agreement, "Okay, maybe it is, but it's true." His eyes traveled over her features, "You deserve some happiness, Emma. It's the least that's owed to you."

It was then that she became aware of the heat emanating from his body. It seemed to leech onto her and infiltrate her own body, spreading upward to her cheeks till a full-blown blush encompassed her.

She did want happiness. She yearned for it.

She felt the hope drain out of her, knowing how dumb she was being. She knew that happiness just wasn't for her, it was always just out of reach. Just like it was now.

A frown marred her features and he copied the movements. He looked confused at her sudden change of behavior, and she couldn't blame him. She began to move away, not wanting to continue to torture herself.

But he reached out and held her in place.

Tingles shot up her arm and a shiver lit its way up her spine. She glanced up into his eyes, nervous all of a sudden.

"Emma…" he trailed off, licking his lips. His eyes were wide, and she could detect a hint of wildness in them. He looked desperate all of a sudden, but this time it wasn't because of a bad situation.

Another shiver shot down her body and she suddenly couldn't find her breath.

"I…" he tried once more, his eyes glancing down on her face on their own accord. He licked his lips again, almost unconsciously. Suddenly she had to make him understand. She stepped to him once again, closer than before.

"I don't want Neal anymore," she wrapped a hand around his arm, gently applying pressure to make him understand what she was trying to say. "I don't want to be with Neal."

"…Emma," his voice was low and gravelly and she clenched her hand without realizing. She leaned in more. "I…can't."

She pulled back, feeling as though he'd slapped her. Then she remembered.

Belle.

As a white hot pain shot through her heart, she wrenched her hand away and took as many steps back as she could without leaving the room.

Once again…right beyond her reach.

She turned from him, arms wrapped around herself as though trying to hold everything in.

"Sorry, I forgot about her, I wasn't thinking. It won't happen again." She was rambling and she knew it, but she needed to get out of there, away from him and this situation. She had been so careful up till now. Perfectly placed distances and masks and words to keep these types of things at bay and far away. And it was all going to Hell, because now she knows that anything that could come from this is completely wrong and it can't be hers.

It was never hers to begin with.

"Her? You mean-…You mean Belle?" his voice sounded incredulous, enough so that she had to turn back around to see his expression. "That's, Emma that's not what I meant at all."

She took a step closer. "Then what did you mean?" her voice shook and she realized that she didn't care.

He studied her face, his eyes softening, "Oh luv, I just…" he clenched his jaw, his hands reaching up as though to bring her near. But he stopped himself. They went back to his sides.

"I want you to be happy, but…it's just not with me," he laughed, but it wasn't jovial. It was filled with self-loathing and bitterness. He stepped away from her, but she covered the distance in three long strides.

"I'll decide that for myself." She stated, her head held high and her goal clear in mind. His eyes widened before narrowing.

He leaned in, "Are you sure, princess? This is dangerous territory you're embarking on." His voice was dark and rough again and she didn't have to answer or think about it because she had made her decision long ago.

She brought her hands up and softly cupped his face. He startled, but she didn't let that deter her. Stroking his cheek, she leaned forward, her intentions clear.

He met her halfway and they fused together in a way Emma hadn't expected. Her hands ran around his neck and into his hair, trying to get as close to him as physically possible. He seemed to have the same idea, as he gripped her hips and grinded them against his. She gasped and pulled his hair roughly and he slammed her into his desk in retaliation.

Soon their bodies were wrapped completely around each other and she found that this was what she had been reaching for all this time. And she had to admit- it was definitely worth the wait.