Anyway…here's the next chapter. I actually wrote it awhile ago but couldn't find the right place for it until now. I hope you like it. Also, I hope Grace isn't too Mary Jane blah, I'm trying to use her as a mirror for Hanna (I know that probably doesn't make much sense but it's the best description I can do right now) so she will be making more appearances throughout the story. Therefore I want to know when she's getting too much like I'm trying to force her into the story. Yes the eating disorder stuff is based off personal stuff so I really need someone to keep me in check that she doesn't become too much like me.
Hanna stepped out of the shower and slipped into her nice soft cotton robe. She stared into the mirror deciding what to do with her hair before reached for her towel to dry it a little. As she pulled the towel to her, something small fell to the ground. Wrapped inside her folded towel had been a present from A with a note attached. Seems like A was planning part of her outfit for the night.
"Since he's moved into the guest room doesn't that make him a guest? Aren't you supposed to make guests happy? You know what would make him happy? You. In. This. –A"
Ugh A is such a perv, Hanna thought to herself as she imagined what A's intentions were. Technically any pictures or sex tape A made could be seen as child pornography since they were both minors. But Hanna wasn't complaining. She was getting free lingerie and getting to show off to Caleb. But this time, she wasn't listening to A. Her actions with Caleb were too fast, too rushed. She regretted every moment of what they had done before. She wasn't going to let A push them into another situation like that. It would put their new relationship in jeopardy.
But nonetheless she found herself standing in her bathroom, staring at her reflection in the mirror. She wasn't going to show it to Caleb but what's the harm in just trying it on. It's not like she could return it anyway. But trying it on was a mistake. What she saw horrified her. It didn't fit. Sure the mark on the label said it should fit but it didn't. Her breasts were spilling out of the cups and her waistline seemed to have expanded substantially under the sheer fabric. She looked fat. There was no nice way of putting it. If she had ever considered the idea of entertaining Caleb while wearing this, that idea was long gone by the time she looked at herself. She was just thankful it was a more free-flowing baby-doll style rather than a tight, pinching corset. She didn't even want to think what she might look like in the latter.
The sound of her phone buzzing snapped her from her harsh criticism of her body and made her nearly jump out of her skin. Hesitantly she picked up her phone. She knew it was A. Only A knew exactly when she felt the worst about herself and when the perfect opportunity for a striking blow was. And sending a text while she was standing in front of a mirror, criticizing every flaw seemed only fitting for the bitch known as A.
"Aww…it doesn't fit right…you know how to fix that. The toothbrush is on the counter. –A"
A was right. She was hideous and disgusting. It made her feel sick to look at her own reflection. So when she picked up the toothbrush and forced the smooth handle down her throat, she didn't feel bad. She felt better. As she gagged and heaved into the toilet bowl she felt even better than when she had picked up the toothbrush. Once more for good measure-she had a lot to lose-and she felt almost decent. At least she did until she heard the knock on the door.
"Hanna? You ok?" came Caleb's voice from the other side. Surely he hadn't heard her though.
"I'm fine. I'll be out it a minute," Hanna squeaked giving Caleb all the probable cause he needed to pull the bobby pin out of his pocket and pick the lock open. Hanna didn't have time to hide or even cover herself before the door swung open.
"You're obviously not fine," Caleb scolded when he saw Hanna on the floor. He recognized the scene immediately. The toothbrush clutched in one hand while the other clung to the toilet bowl to steady herself.
"I told you to go away," Hanna growled picking herself up off the floor knowing the only way out of this was to stay strong and act like nothing was wrong.
"And I told you about Grace, how bad that hurt me. And here you are…on the floor of the bathroom, just like her. This is sick. You are sick. You need help," Caleb said furiously standing his ground.
"I am not sick and I don't need help," Hanna screeched ignoring the fact that she wasn't exactly wearing clothes, something Caleb had just realized.
"Do you even realize how bad what you're doing is? This is same stupid shit that nearly killed someone who meant so much to me. I told you that but you still…I'm calling your therapist. She can help you because I don't know what else to do," Caleb said storming out of the bathroom to the phone, or at least he would have if she hadn't been wearing what she was. God it was so hard for him to look away. What he had just caught her doing was sick and it should've ended all thoughts of how sexy she looked but…wow…and she thought she needed to lose any weight.
"Great, just pass off the problem to someone else. Just like everyone else always does," Hanna said taking a step closer to him.
He cornered her against the wall to stop her from running away like he knew she was about to try. Then gently put his hands on either side of her face, forcing her to look at him. He was ready to make his point when he made the mistake of looking into her eyes. They were full of an emotion he just couldn't wrap his mind around. He didn't know what it was but it made him want to take her right there and then but at the same time it made him want to just take her in his arms and hold her, tell her everything would be ok and chase off whatever big bad thing was scaring her. She saw the desire in his eyes which made her want to kiss him with such passion that there would be no need for words but she also saw the confusion and the gears turning in his head as he tried to process what was going on.
"Why do you do this to yourself? You don't need it. You're better than this," Caleb said staring straight into her eyes.
She had no response vocally but decided to make her move then. She would not let him over think this. If he did, he might jump to conclusions and everything would go wrong, at least that's what happened whenever she over thought anything. She stole a quick kiss and pulled back. He continued to stare at her. Her actions had made his problem worse and by now she could probably feel it too. He had been pushed over the edge and now all that was left to do was to get out all the passion and desire they had for one another. They were wrapped up in the moment, seconds away from slipping into old routines. But she was afraid she didn't want to go back to how things were, she didn't know what she was feeling or how to react so she pushed him away.
"I have to get dressed for dinner," she offered quietly without looking at him before turning and running for her room, slamming the door behind her.