Chapter 35
Milla awoke at fifteen thousand breaths. She untangled herself gently from Tal's embrace and crept to the bathroom. It still amazed her how she had acclimated to her morning routine. It was so different from her mornings on the ice. For example, it was a luxury to bathe every morning. It was quickly becoming Milla's favourite routine.
The hot water from the faucet spewed forth and Milla filled the tub with a sigh of ecstasy. She threw balta spice in and stripped her night gown. She slowly stepped in and let the hot water relax her muscles. It was blissful. She must have been in there for half an hour before Tal's sleepy head poked itself into the bathroom. Milla gave him her secret smile and he took it as a sign to enter.
"May I join you?" he asked sleepily.
"If you don't, I'll drag you in." Milla replied mischievously.
Tal smiled and washed his face before he stripped and joined his future bride in the tub. Milla saw the same look of ecstasy on his face as he let the hot water work its magic. Milla waded towards him and sat between his legs. Tal wrapped his arms around her almost instinctively.
"Good morning," he whispered into her ear as he gave her a quick peck on the cheek.
Milla turned her head and planted a gentle kiss on his ready lips in silent answer. They parted and sat comfortably in silence for a while just enjoying each other's company. As they sat there, their minds wandered to the day's tasks. Milla wondered if she should tell him about her duel as she absently scrubbed herself down with balta spice silently debating her dilemma. Eventually she felt like she wouldn't have to say a word. Tal probably already knew. Tal scrubbed her back absent mindedly as she moved her long hair out of the way. As soon as he was done, Milla switched positions and began to wash her husband. She started in slow circles at his neck and slowly made her way down his back. Tal winced as she ran her hands down his ribs.
"That tickles." He explained as she stopped her cleaning.
"I shall remember that." Milla said with a hint of mischief in her tone.
When their cleaning was done, they laid in each other's arms just soaking in the tub. Tal broke the silence first and laid her suspicions to rest.
"I heard about your duel with Laris. Or more likely, I forced it out of her. When you left lunch yesterday I went to look for you. I happened across Laris and well she was never good at hiding anything from me..." Tal said breaking the silence.
"...I was just wondering if I should tell you..." Milla murmured.
"She told me everything."
Milla nodded in understanding and shrugged. It was easier this way. Now that Tal knew he could weigh in on his opinions.
Tal paused and took her hands in his. The worried look on his face was hidden but still present.
"Are you not happy here Milla?" he asked as he finally managed to squeeze out his feelings.
"No more than how you felt trying to adjust to the ice." Milla replied.
"Laris told me you were frustrated. She told me you had the look of a person looking to fight someone. Please be honest with me. Is it because of something I said or did yesterday?" Tal asked earnestly.
Milla took a breath before she answered.
"Tal, be at ease. I found myself...frustrated...this is true. It may have been because I was feeling something akin to jealousy but I am not sure..." she replied truthfully.
"May I ask what you could possibly be jealous about?" Tal asked feeling slightly relieved.
Milla thought for a moment before she smiled and replied.
"A woman's pride is a fickle thing therefore she is allowed her secrects. I heard one of the lady's of the blue tower say this to me once and I believe, in a small way, this still applies to all women, Icecarl and Chosen."
"I see." Tal said at length.
Milla smiled as she went on.
"This feeling...This possessive feeling I feel for you is not a feeling I have felt often. I must admit it did take me by surprise. I am not used to dealing with such strong yet subtle emotions."
"You are doing very well at it though. Not something that I haven't expected from you. However, feelings come from a very real place inside of us and if it isn't dealt with, it could manifest into something far more sinister," Tal said stiffly "Would you like to talk about it?"
"Icecarls are not known for talking about problems," Milla replied equally stiffly.
"Don't hide behind that. I'm trying. Ever since last year, I've been the sole source of your complications..."
"Not a fact I tend to let you forget my love," Milla interjected.
Tal smiled at her wit before moving on.
"I just thought that maybe you were simply tired of me. It is a lot to accept in a circling. Did you want to slow things down?"
"Tal we have promised the Crones that we would come to terms with our relationship in two circling. We cannot ask for more time. Crones are not known for their patience."
"I know. I was just suggesting that we could somehow use the time we have remaining to get to know each other better. I mean with my work as Emperor and conspiracy's to foil, we haven't exactly had time to court each other properly...by Chosen standards I mean..." Tal stuttered.
Milla saw his hesitation as clear as she was staring at him. Perhaps Tal didn't see how deep her love was for him yet. She realised a moment later that she hadn't exactly come out and said the words he has wanted to actually hear. Chosen, by her estimations, seemed very self conscious when it came to love. Milla was far from an expert on the subject but even she knew loyalty, devotion and fealty were key ingredients in a lasting relationship.
Milla thought she had proven her love many times before. Her latest bout of jealousy had been quelled by the reassuring fact, that she was his chosen one. Perhaps she wasn't vocal enough about her feelings. The Chosen were known for their words more than their actions so perhaps she had to tell him more often. Her little tirade yesterday must have shaken his love for her in ways she could not imagine. Milla turned her whole body around to face him and placed his hands over her heart.
"Tal. You are my one and only love and while it is a young love, it still grows day by day. You need not worry about trying to win my affections. Icecarls may be cold on the outside but as you have proven, the ice around our hearts can be thawed."
Tal physically relaxed. His relief was calming her fast beating heart as he truly heard her honest words.
"Thank the light...I was more than a little worried when you left me yesterday. For about two hours, I panicked. I thought that you were fed up with me. I know I've been pushing you to make choices about our relationship and I thought I was scaring you. When I found out where you had gone, I immediately questioned Laris. She told me you were frustrated and I feared the worst. I feared I had pushed too hard."
"I can deal with you pushing Tal. I know what is at stake as well but this is different. You and I are different. I may have my moments of weakness but I feel strong again as I think of how secure your love for me is. You have protected me many times and not just physically. Many times on the Ice, you protected me from myself and it was never a question if you were going to be there for me during my darkest moments. I only ask that you let me protect you this time. This is my circling."
Tal couldn't put into words his feelings of joy and love for her. So he kissed her hoping against hope that in some way his kiss could succeed where his words failed. Milla could feel his intensity and feelings through their shared kiss. A wondrous cacophony of delightful feelings played on Milla's heartstrings and she could no more control these feeling than she could control the slow march of time.
"I love you." He whispered as they parted slightly breathless.
Milla answered back with the same words but for some reason they were much more. Her reply was simple yet each word dripped with more meaning than she could ever realise.
"I love you too," she whispered fearing that her words would lose all meaning if she spoke them any louder.
Tal took her in his arms in one swift and fluid movement. He left the tub with his wife in his arms. They moved to the bedchamber quickly with their bodies still dripping with hot water. Milla knew what was coming and she didn't fear it. She embraced it. Not just Tal's physical body but his soul too. This was the first time they ever truly made love. Up until now, every time their bodies intertwined, it was purely physical. This time was different.
"Tal wait..." Milla pleaded holding him back.
Tal silently and respectfully waited even though every fibre of his being wanted to jump her.
"You once asked me if I wanted children..." Milla started as Tal stayed silent to hear more of her answer.
"I believe I now know the answer." She said letting her arms hang from his neck.
Tal's smile was all the answer she needed before they took part in the most satisfying rapture they ever experienced.
Laris' and Milla's duel didn't go as expected. As Tal and Milla entered the Violet training halls, arm in arm, Laris could see her defeat was absolute even before the duel began. Laris saw the look of pure bliss and rapture Tal had in his eyes as he looked at Milla. Milla had the same twinkle in hers. Even from afar, their love was obvious. So when Milla parted from her lover, and pointed her merwin sword at Laris she was shocked to find the head of the Emperor's guard laughing. It started as a bitter and sad laugh. It slowly turned into a sob and before Milla could sheathe her sword, Laris and flown into her arms.
Stunned yet not overwhelmed by Laris's sudden emotional breakdown, Milla began comforting her. She stroked Laris's hair and cooed to her as if she were a child. She hushed her until she calmed down. Laris parted with tears still dripping from her cheeks. Slightly embarrassed, Laris tried to hide her face but Milla didn't let her. Laris needed to feel the loss. She needed to feel the defeat if she had any chance of moving on from her unrequited feelings for Tal.
Milla wiped the tears from her own eyes before she wiped them from Laris's eyes. After a few minutes of tears, the women found themselves calming and Tal's loss for words as he watched the display only made them smile.
The women stood in what Tal later described as, 'a triumph stance'. Laris offered her sword to Milla and Milla accepted it. The duel was over. Milla was the victor and Tal, while not completely understanding, felt privileged to witness a duel between two women and their pride.
Later, after all three were calm enough to cloak themselves in their respective persona's, they decided it was time to bond over a meal. They left the training halls and made their way to the dining halls. The Aenir landscape calmed them even further and as they sat in Tal's private booth, conversations became light hearted.
"Tal I'm sorry you had to see me like that but in all fairness. You did leave me without really ending things with me," Laris began.
"For that I'm sorry but had I known it would hurt you in such a way, I would have been a bit more assertive in my efforts to end things between you and I properly."
"Like that would have ever happened." Laris said jokingly as she blushed slightly.
"I would also like to apologise," Milla said towards two quizzical sets of eyebrows.
"Had I known, Tal had someone like you still waiting for him, I would not have been so quick to lay claim to him openly," Milla explained.
"The truth would have found its way out eventually. I'm just glad it ended, with us on mutual standing. I really would like to be friends with you Milla." Laris said a little hesitantly.
Milla smiled.
"And I have wished to find a true friend in you," she replied.
"This being said; if you ever hurt him, I'll make sure you suffer for it," Laris said with mock seriousness."
"You will certainly try," Milla replied slyly.
The three laughed merrily at the mock rivalry and soon found other happy things to talk about until a presence made itself known in their midst. A woman of unchallenged beauty moved through the gossamer curtains and waited till all eyes fell to her before she went on.
"My dear Emperor I regret to inform you of ill tidings," Fairiden announced stiffly as she hesitantly looked at Laris and Milla.
"It's okay Fairiden. Anything you have to say can be said in their company," Tal reassured pulling his serious Emperor's mask on.
Fairiden bowed her head slightly in understanding before she went on with her news.
"It seems Bartian..."
"Bartian?" Milla asked.
"You know him as Gyser, my light Vizier. His full name is Bartian Gyser-Lamitir." Tal informed quickly.
"Bartian has found out where the red keystone is," Fairiden finished.
Tal frowned before he stood.
"Is he planning to take it?" he asked moving closer to Fairden.
"Not yet but I feel it will only be a matter of..."
"Time." Said a voice from behind the gossamer curtains.
A portly yet tall man emerged from the gossamer and smiled a sinister smile at the four people assembled in the dinning booth.
"Gyser..." Tal said coolly.