Chapter 36
I flip the channel to the TV again bored out of my mind. Since what happened a couple of days ago, I haven't seen Mr. Howard since our kiss. I scared him away. Who wouldn't? You're a student and he's a teacher. I hope he visit me. It's Thanksgiving. I know he'll be in the hospital seeing how his wife is still in the hospital in her coma. Jacob been visiting me regularly along with everybody else but not the girls. Jacob told me they can't leave the tribe for anything till Victoria and her army is gone.
I haven't seen Nurse Miller yet and it's kind of weird seeing how your best friend is in the hospital. You can come and visit me but it must be something else going on or another reason. I rub my hands together. I know for a fact that my hands will be on fire today. It's Thanksgiving. The hospital will be full with a whole lot of people. Why I wanted to get out before the holiday and I wanted to spend it with Jacob.
He's coming today. I know he knows something is up. It's in my heart or it can be my mind. It's no need for him to get upset nor me. I'm still in the sky with many emotions going through my mind from confusion to happiness.
I'll chalk it up to my hormones. A knock on my door and Orlando pushes a cart in. It's his round again to check my vitals. Dr. Roberts work at the clinic. So, Orlando is my nurse. "How you doing, Lacie?" He asks as I hold out my arm ready for him to check my blood pressure. "I'm doing good. My attitude has been good lately." I say as he gets out the blood pressure checker.
"You're not emotional?" He asks hooking the cuff up to my arm but it's the way he said it. "No, why?" I asks. He shrugs shoulder while writing on the clipboard. Oh, did he see me and Mr. Howard in the hallway? I look at him. "It's just pregnant women tend to be more hormonal." He say taking off the cuffs. "Meaning what?" "More in their emotions of crying and being happy. Just changing up." He say.
"I see what you're saying. I wanted to hump Dr. Roberts before Jacob and his friends came." "That's one example being horny." He say. "I nearly miscarried my baby the day before and I was still feeling something, Orlando." I say. "I know, Lacie." He say. "You must not know to bring it up like that. What is it?" I ask trying to find out where he's going with it.
"He's a married man and he been through so much with his wife in the hospital. He lost his child and wife in the same night." He seriously say putting his pen back on the cart. "I heard about what happened but I'm not looking for a relationship with him." I say unsure about it. I mean he is there for me but as a boyfriend or any of that is certainly out of the room.
He's my teacher. "He's a married man. His heart been broken already." "I'm not trying to break his heart. He been there for me during my hard times. He's my teacher. It's nothing going on." "I don't want it to be, Lacie." "It's not. It was me being down and he was there for me. That's all it is, Orlando." I say. "His heart is broken, Lacie." He say again.
I nod at what he's saying. I better change the subject. "It won't happen again. Am I getting another tray? It's Thanksgiving." I say grinning hard. "I'll see but you only got lucky last time, Lacie. You just had high blood pressure but it can cause you to miscarry." He say doing the last of my check up. I nod my head at what he's saying. He's very mad.
"I'll talk to you later." He say pushing the cart out before I can speak back. He must be a real good friend of Mr. Howard. I breathe out feeling old in the face and looking at the phone. I should call Jacob and wish him a Happy Thanksgiving. I pick up the phone and dial his house phone hoping he's there. It rings and rings. I hang up the phone having a dumb moment.
Oh, that kiss got my mind muddled. I scratch my hair picking up the phone to call Sue's house. Someone answers on the second ring. I hear the loud clattering and talking in the background. "Hello." Seth voice say in the phone. I think for a minute before speaking. "Where is Jacob?" I ask him. It get silent in the house. "He's right here." He say.
"Lacie." He answers. "You supposed to be here having Thanksgiving with me in the hospital." I say getting in my emotions. "Why don't you ask your boyfriend to enjoy with you?" He growls out. Oh, maybe that was him who was following me. I mute the TV. "I saw you last night, Lacie." He say. "Saw me what?" I ask him. He doesn't answer.
"Jacob, it was my hormones. It was not a big deal." I say hearing the door opening up and I turn around to see Mr. Howard standing in the doorway with a bag. We make eye contact. Oh, I hope he didn't hear that. He probably did. I wave him in. He walks in and close the door behind him. "If you say so, Lacie." Jacob say. I change my mind. "You don't have to come. I was just actually calling to wish you and everybody a Happy Thanksgiving. Bye, Jacob." I say while watching Mr. Howard take off his coat.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Lacie. Bye." He say and hang up the phone. I hang up the phone too. "Jacob's not coming?" Mr. Howard asks sitting in the stool next to my bed and putting the bag in my lap. "I don't need Jacob. I believe you supposed to visit first then do what you do. I don't need them here with me. I have you." I say going into the bag to find out what he found me.
"It's okay to cry, Ms. Thorne." He say. "I know but I'm a strong girl who doesn't cry and is strong." I say looking at the plate of food. Turkey. Ham. Mashed Potatoes. A Thanksgiving plate of food. "Thank you. Where's yours?" I ask lifting it up and not seeing another plate. "I already ate mine." He say. I look in his face. "It was a big deal I mean you don't do that everyday." I say whispering it.
I don't know why. "I shouldn't had did what I did." "It was on me. You just stood there giving me comfort." I say shaking my head. I guess he doesn't have anything to say. It get silent in the room. "Do you want some?" I ask offering him some. "I'm okay. I had already ate." "With your friends and family?" I nervously ask him. "With them." He say. I nod my head.
I really don't know what to say. "Anybody came to visit you?" He asks me. "Only Orlando. I guess Dr. Roberts coming later or going to call then my friends is coming. It's kind of sad and lonely spending a holiday in a hospital room when you expected to be at home with family and friends." I sadly say. I'm not going to cry again. "I'm here with you. Don't cry. Lacie." He say grabbing me some tissue off the nightstand.
"I'm not trying too but it's kind of hard. Pregnant and alone." I say taking the tissue and wiping my eyes even though it's no tears. "But, you're not alone." He say making me grin. Funny line. "I know. Now it's awkward between us and you vanished for a couple of days. I tried calling you and you didn't answer. It was kind of weird." I say and laugh at the end.
"It is and I should apologize. It was no way for me to act the way that I did especially to a student." He say. I swear I feel my heart going down a notch. He told me. I glance at his wedding ring then at his face. "I'm very sorry, Ms. Thorne." He say. The notch went down again. I stare into his eyes looking at him blinking hard. "It's okay. It's on my part. It was mostly hormones and being this close then seeing the baby on the screen. It was all too much." I say playing with the bag.
"I'm real sorry." He say but I just keep looking at his lips. I don't even respond to him. Jacob is supposed to be here. I feel the tears forming in my eyes. It get silent as he just stares in my face. "Do you want me to call your parents?" He asks me. "No, they know. They can't make it but I love hearing their voices. I talk to them everyday." I say. I really do miss my parents.
"Are you sure?" He asks me. "I am very sure. I would've knocked this day off with ease if not for my emotions and pregnancy." I say looking down at the plate of food. "You're a girl. It's okay to cry." He say. Boyfriend not here. Turned down by Mr. Howard. This day cannot get no worse. "I don't want to cry." Even though the whole situations calls for me to cry.
"Okay, Ms. Thorne. Do you want to watch TV?" He asks me. "Sure." I say nodding and unmuteing the TV. I turn to a football game and take my food out while Mr. Howard looks at my every movie. I'm not even hungry now. This Thanksgiving is ruined. Mr. Howard turn his attention towards the TV while I dig into the food.
I finished the food and is trying to use the bathroom but can't to get the soap dispenser to work. I look at myself in the mirror and check out my face. I have bags under my eyes. My face looks tired. It was a mistake. This Thanksgiving has been hell. I hear someone knock on the door. "Ms. Thorne, you need help?" Mr. Howard ask on the other side of the door.
I try the soap dispenser again. "I can't get the soap to work." I say walking up to the door and opening it with my hospital gown. He walks in and look at it. "It's not working?" He asks looking at it. "No, it's not." I say walking back to the sink and pressing the dispenser a couple of times but the soap doesn't work. "It's no wipes or hand sanitizer and I don't want nasty toilet hands." I say while he looks at it.
"I wouldn't either." He say. I nod my head grinning hard and point to it. He walks in and try to push the dispenser. "Is it any in there?" He asks it trying to lift it up. "It's a lot of it because it's heavy but it's not pushing out." I say as the bathroom door closes. He turns around and look at the door. "I hate that door. Well, I love it because it closes because of the wind." I say crossing my arms.
"The window isn't open." He say turning back to the soap dispenser. "I know. It's a joke to lighten up the mood and awkwardness that we're end." I say looking at him through the mirror. He glances up before going back to the dispenser. "It is real awkward." "Yeah, and I don't use to be like that. It wasn't a mistake and it was a big deal, Mr. Howard." I say.
"It was a big deal and I never should've acted in that way. It was very inappropriate for me as an adult." "I understand that but I guess it's what I needed. I don't know because I'm confused. I'm supposed to be in a relationship now and the boyfriend is not here emotionally. You are and I really appreciate you allowing me to do that but when you disappeared. It kind of got me." I seriously say.
He's quiet for a couple of seconds. "I hear you, Ms. Thorne." He say. "I'm just checking. I don't want you to apologize because at the time I needed that and I probably would've gotten any other man. You should've seen what I tried on Dr. Roberts." "What you try?" He asks looking at me through the mirror. "We was hugging and he was comforting me. I broke down and I did what I did with you when you was hugging me the first time." I explain.
"Did you kiss him?" "No, I didn't kiss him. I tried to put my leg on him then Jacob and his friends walked in. I guess my emotions and hormones jumped out of context. My mind was telling me to jump him." I say and he glances at me nodding his head not saying anything. "I guess he understand more seeing how he's a doctor and he has hormonal teenage girls jumping at him all of the time." I say.
He nod his head looking directly in my face. I scratch my head and it goes back to silent between us. "I hope you're not jealous, Mr. Howard." I say. "I'm not jealous, Ms. Thorne." "I can't tell from how the looks you was giving me. I promise to only jump your bones in the future." I say grinning. "I don't want you too. I'm married." He say making my grin drop quick and I feel like crying but I hold it in.
I scratch my hair confused again. "Okay, it must be something-" "It's nothing between us if that's what you're getting at." He say cutting me off and twisting the soap dispenser top back on it. "Okay." I say rocking on my toes. I guess he can't get it. He press it down again. "You might have to use wipes or ask a nurse, Ms. Thorne." He say turning around to look at me.
I nod my head looking at him in the face. He just stands there looking at me. I walk up towards him. He just stands there looking down at me. He is a little bit taller than I am. I put my hands behind me not trying to touch on his shirt. I don't want it to carry germs but it's a shirt and it'll be washed. I lick my lips and put my hands on his shoulders.
I stand on my tip toes and kiss his lips. I come down looking in his face as he show no reaction. I don't understand. Is it sympathy or something? "I'm confused." I say. He's showing no reaction. "Okay." I say and pull on his shirt causing him to lean down and I kiss him hard while he keeps his hands on the side of him. I wish you would do something, Mr. Howard.
He doesn't kiss back or anything. Just like last time."Okay." I say against his lips and try to grab at his arms but he moves them out of the way where I can't reach them. "Okay." I say again frustrated and rubbing my thumb against his lip. "Happy Thanksgiving, Mr. Howard." I say walking to the door and opening it up leaving him alone in the bathroom while I walk to the bed and get on it.
He walks out a little bit later and closes the door behind him. He glances at me before walking to his chair that's in front of the TV. We was watching the football game before I needed to use the bathroom. He sits down with his back behind me. I rub on my stomach feeling on my baby bump while looking at the back of his head. I don't think he liked it.
I look at his wedding ring on his right hand. Maybe that's reason or how my attitude is or his for the couch but you can add in that I attacked him part. I wonder what it is. I rub on my stomach while watching the back of Mr. Howard's head. "Happy Thanksgiving, Mr. Howard." I say. "Happy Thanksgiving, Ms. Thorne." He say in a smartly tone. Oh, that's him. I breathe out laying back on the bed feeling tired. I close my eyes to rest for a little bit.
I open my eyes to people talking in my hospital room. "Lacie." I hear Dr. Roberts call me and I turn on the other side of the bed to see Jacob and his friends but no . Jacob walks over to my side. "Hey, you're up." He say kneeling in front of me. It suddenly get silent. "I'm up. What you doing here?" I ask him grinning. "I came to visit Thanksgiving with you." He say making me grab his hand and kiss it.
"My stomach hurts a little bit." I say feeling my stomach tightening up. They all look at Dr. Roberts. "It might've been the food that you ate." Mr. Howard say walking out of the bathroom. "Could it had been?" Jacob asks Dr. Roberts. "It could've been." He say. "I did eat it kind of fast then I fell asleep. Look, it's night time." I say looking out of the window at the dark sky.
"It is. You slept for a long time." Jacob say. "I bet. When did you all get here?" I ask looking at Embry and Quil. "Like two hours ago. Are you sure you're okay?" Quil asks me. "I'm okay. It's not other pain or anything. Just a normal stomach ache and that's it. It's not the different pain." "What's the different pain?" Jacob asks me. Everybody looks in my face.
"Like it's a regular stomach ache then it's an intense pain like before." "When?" He asks confused. "Like when Mr. Howard was over for dinner and I had that ache in the kitchen." I explain. "Any other discomforts?" Dr. Robert asks me. "It was nothing else." I whisper. "Can you check her out?" Jacob asks him. "I can check her out." Dr. Roberts say.
"I don't need to be checked out but you can if you want. What you going to press on my stomach or something?" I ask him. "And, maybe a vaginal exam." He say making me nod my head. "Okay, but it's nothing to be crazy about. I didn't miscarry." I say looking at Jacob causing them all to look at him. "I didn't say you did, Lacie." He say denying it.
"But, you insinuated it." I say. "No, I did not." He say. It get silent in the room. "You did not make it seem like I miscarried." "No, I did not." He say. I just nod my head at him. "He didn't insinuated it, Lacie." Embry say looking at me. I look around at each guy's face to see their reaction. "He didn't, Lacie." Dr. Roberts say. "Maybe, I'm going a little bit crazy. It's been days since I been in the hospital." I say looking at Mr. Howard.
"It's been a few days and it's understandable, Ms. Thorne." He say making me breathe out. "I can be checked out but I'm sure it was just the food and regular stomach ache, Dr. Roberts." I say to him while squeezing Jacob's hand. He squeezes back. "Okay, Lacie." Dr. Robert says and it goes back quiet. "I changed my mind. I just want to go back to sleep." I say when he starts to walk up towards me.
He stops walking. "Did something happened?" Jacob asks Mr. Howard. "Nothing happened, Jacob. She ate. We watched the football game and she fell asleep till she just woke up a few minutes ago." He explains as both Quil and Embry looks at him. Dr. Roberts sit on the bed next to me. "I'm okay. I'm just exhausted. I emotionally drained. I don't need to be checked every time." I say to all of them but mostly Jacob.
"Okay, Lacie." He say looking in my face. "Okay, Jacob." I say looking out of the window. "Do you want anything to drink?" Dr. Robert asks me. "No, I'm okay. I'm just real tired and just want to sleep. I'm full and just tired." I say to him. "Okay." He say looking at the guys. "You don't have to kick them out. I'm good. Just go back to watching the game or whatever. I'mma just go back to sleep." I say closing my hands as Jacob squeezes it again.