A/N: I don't own the wrestlers! I do own Pixie and Betsy. As always, it's meant in fun.

The Mizard Of Odd

Chapter 34: Miz Gets Babysat

"Everything's still kind of fuzzy," Christian said to Punk. "And I have no idea where JJ went, but when he gets back, I'm going to bite him so hard…"

Punk sighed. "He's got a point."

Randy frowned. "You're going to let him bite JJ?"

"No, but we need to find JJ." He looked around. "Miz, can you keep an eye on Matt?"

"I'm blind, remember?" Miz snapped. "I can't even see my food."

"He'll be fine," Randy said. "We can just tell Mark he's a babysitter."

"Great," Punk muttered. "Mark! Stop being a bee and come be a babysitter!"

"I'm a babysitter?" Mark said, pausing mid-buzz and coming back to the table.

"Yes," Punk said.

"Great! My name is Tina and I need five bucks an hour, per kid."

Randy nodded. "Okay. You watch Miz and Jeff." He pushed Mark into the chair at the end, next to Matt. "Don't let them go anywhere. There are bad people out to get them."

Mark's eyes were huge. "Okay. Can I order some orange juice? Kids need juice."

"Fine," Punk said. "I'll send the waitress by with some juice. We'll be right back."

"Okay, Mr. Punk," Mark said happily. "Don't forget, five bucks an hour per kid."

"Got it, Tina. Thanks," Punk said. "Come on, Randy. Let's go find JJ." He paused and grabbed Christian's arm. "You have to come, too. I'm not leaving you alone with Miz and Jeff."

"Maybe we should color!" Mark said. "Here are some crayons."

"Yay!" Matt said.

"I can't see," Miz said.

"Coloring makes everything better!" Mark said, handing Miz a crayon and pushing his food out of the way.

Miz sighed and colored on the table. "Am I inside the lines?"

"Close enough," Mark said. Matt giggled.

The waitress came back with a carafe of orange juice and three glasses. "Would you like anything else?" she asked, glaring at Miz, who was now drawing a green dinosaur on the table.

"We're going to need seven of those kids cups with lids," Mark said, "and more orange juice."

"All right," the waitress sighed. "I'll be right back."

"That's a nice dinosaur," Mark told Miz. "What's his name?"

"Betsy," Miz muttered.

"Hey! That's my fish's name!" Matt said, perking up to look at Miz.

"Yeah, this is your Betsy's ancestor."

"Cool! But he's green!"

"Is he?" Miz asked. "I can't see the crayons."

"Yep!" Matt said. He went to sit next to Miz. "I like green, but blue is better."

"Here's your cups and your juice," the waitress said, setting the second carafe and the cups on the table. "Will there be anything else?"

"I think we're good, thanks," Mark said. He poured the juice into the cups, humming. "I'll have your juice for you in just a minute, guys," he told Miz and Matt.

"I like juice," Matt said.

"Me too," Miz said.

Mark said, "It's nice when you boys get along. Here's your juice, Jeff. And here, give this one to Miz, okay?"

Matt's fingers were sticky as he helped Miz with the juice cup. "It's a plastic cup," he told Miz, "and it has a red lid, so you won't spill. And a plastic straw!"

Miz nodded and took a sip of the juice. "Guess we should have ordered this instead of water," he said.

"It's very good for you. Oh look, here comes everyone else," Mark said.

"I'd look, but I can't see," Miz said.

"I never complained that much about not being able to see," Christian said, sitting down next to Miz and taking the juice that Mark offered.

"You complained about it all the time, Rey," JJ said. "It got old fast."

"I will bite you," Christian said to JJ. "Don't think I won't."

Randy sighed. "No biting! How many times do I have to say it?"

"Why should I listen to you?" Christian asked. "You bite people all the time."

Punk said, "Randy, why don't you go pay the bill?"

"Fine," Randy said, snagging his juice from the table. "I'll be back in a minute."

Punk dropped into his seat, exhausted. "You were right, Miz," he said. "Coming in was a bad idea."

"I don't know," Miz said. "Aside from going blind, this is the most fun I've had this whole trip."

"Did you color on the table?" Punk asked, leaning forward to stare at the dinosaur Miz had drawn on the table.

"I don't think so," Miz said. "I drew a dinosaur on my menu."

"Uh, okay," Punk said, leaning back in his seat again. "Maybe we should get going?"

"Yay, roadtrip!" Matt said, bouncing. "Come on, Miz! You can sit by me in the car this time!"

"But you're sitting up front," Miz said.

"I don't like up front! I want to sit in the back in the back!"

"In the very back?" Miz translated. "But where will JJ sit?"

"He can sit up front!"

"Works for me," Punk said. "It might be nice not to have to watch him and Betsy."

"But what about Pixie?" Miz asked.

"You'll have to keep an eye on her," Punk said.

Miz sighed. "I'm blind, remember?"

"I forgot," Punk admitted. "Okay, JJ sits up front with me, you and Jeff sit in the very back with Orton, and Mark and Christian are in the middle."

"Tina," Mark said.

"Right. Tina. Sorry."

"And you owe me ten bucks," Mark said.

Punk sighed and dug out the money. "Thanks for watching them. Now help me get everyone into the car and I'll give you more money when we get to where we're going."

"Deal," Mark said. "Let's go, people! Time's wasting!"

Miz said, "You're going to pay Tina more money?"

"Are you kidding? By the time we get to where we're going, Tina will be a long distant memory and he'll be a flapjack or something," Punk said.