Note: When I first started this story I assumed that it would be over in ten or so chapters so I decided to name the chapters by either the different colours of amber (the stone) or things associated with the colour that is usually called amber (hence liquid amber referred to whisky; amber wall to the amber room in Tsarskoye Selo; blue, green, black and so on are colour variations of amber etc). I tried to match the name to something on the chapter but eventually I ran into trouble. So now the name of the chapter is mostly just connected to amber – not necessarily to the chapter. But all the words I do use are used to describe amber in some way: pit amber is mined from rock, bone is a colour type, resinous is used to describe the lustre of amber and so on. Have to say that I have always liked amber but never knew how fascinating the stone really is until I started the read up on it – and there are some great sites on the net for it.
And thank you again for your reviews. I do appreciate them :)
Amber dropped her overnight bag to Wilson's room before she went on to see Helena. On the way she also notified Chase that she had arrived. Chase was still alone though he had got back to Amber earlier on to tell her that Cameron had changed shifts and would join the dinner party if it was ok with Amber.
"She doesn't trust you with me does she?" Amber had smiled somewhat patronisingly.
"It's not that really, after all we do see each other often enough without her around," Chase had sighed. "I think that she was just feeling that we are deliberately ostracising her. If you don't want her there, it's ok, I'll take her somewhere else for a nice meal with just the two of us."
"You're trying to guilt me aren't you," Amber had glared. "You know I don't like her and you really do know that nothing will really change that, but you still want to try."
"I don't expect you two to start suddenly liking each other," Chase had denied. "But I do think you could learn to be civil. Yeah, I know she mostly starts it but you do egg her on."
Amber was still feeling a little grumpy over Chase's manipulation, but she had to admit that Chase was also right. She and Cameron needed to find some kind of truce since Chase did want both of them in his life. In the end Amber had decided to minimise Cameron's presence by inviting House and Cuddy, too. She had considered asking Foreman, too, but the idea of spending the night with both Cameron and Hadley was more than she could stomach, so she had decided against it.
She reached Helena's room and knocked on the door. Helena had been waiting her almost at the door (the reception had, after all, called her that Amber was on her way) and she opened almost immediately. Ari was sitting in a high chair at a table near the window eating his evening snack. He was more than happy to see Amber and even offered her some of his snack – she declined, telling him that she would get hers later. Soon after that they put Ari to bed and he fell asleep in the middle of his bedtime story.
"He has had an eventful day," Helena sighed. "This is the first time he has ever been away from home."
"He seems to have adjusted just fine to travelling," Amber observed.
"Well, he spends most of his time with me, so the difference for him isn't that huge," Helena explained. "And he is used to driving in a car when we visit my parents. But they live just two hours away, so we don't stay the night. Or we haven't so far."
"You think you will stay with them longer in the future?" Amber asked neutrally as she took a seat on the couch in the living room of the suite.
"Yes," Helena said. "Even if I don't decide to divorce your Father, I will definitely spend more time with my parents and family. Drink?"
"What are you having?" Amber shrugged.
"Juice," Helena stated. "I'm having a break from everything alcoholic."
"Juice is fine with me," Amber responded but she gave a questioning look to Helena.
"Coming up," Helena didn't explain anything until she had got them both some juice. "You see, the thing that really woke me up was finding out about your Mother's alcoholism."
"Oh?" Amber was still cautious.
"The weekend before your Father left for his business trip he came home very late both Saturday and Sunday," Helena told Amber. "So I was alone those evenings. Now I never drink with Ari around, but I have sometimes indulged in a relaxing drink in the evening once I have put him to bed. And of course, I do sometimes have a glass of wine with food if we are eating out or entertaining. I'm not an absolutist, but I was also under the impression that I don't need alcohol either. That is until I found myself pouring a third drink for myself on Sunday night. Now, obviously I wasn't drunk but I was over the limit for driving so if something had happened to Ari requiring me to drive, I couldn't have done it."
"I can't see how three drinks on a Sunday night could be that bad," Amber was still being cautious about drawing conclusions – and especially of appearing judgemental. "Sure, it wasn't wise if you were home alone with Ari, but not exactly a crime."
"No, not a crime," Helena smiled ruefully. "But I did suddenly hear your voice telling your Father what it had been like to grow up with an alcoholic Mother in my mind. And I realised that I could easily slip down that road too. Sure, I don't drink when Ari is awake and around, but he will go to kindergarten soon and then to school and I will spend a lot of time alone. What then? How will I then dull my mind to having nothing but my son to live for?"
"Surely you have more than that!" Amber exclaimed.
"I should have," Helena agreed. "I have a good education. I have a marriage – or more precisely I thought I had a marriage. It was only once I really sat down and thought about it all that I realised that I had given up a lot of things about myself to be a wife to a husband who is hardly ever even around."
"And a mother?" Amber suggested.
"No, I didn't give up anything to be a mother," Helena smiled. "Ari is a constant source of joy. Nothing I have given up is worth more than he is. But many of the things I did give up I didn't need to. In fact, if I want to be the mother Ari deserves I need to regain quite a few of them."
"So what do you think to do?" Amber asked.
"I'm not sure yet," Helena sighed. "There has been no divorce in my family ever. There are a couple or marriages that aren't doing that well, but the couples have found a way to cope. My Mother is of the opinion that if there is no clear reason for divorce – like abuse or repeated infidelity – then you stay married and just deal. And I have to say that those that I know about are still good parents to their children. Only I doubt your Father will be a good parent to Ari. But since he isn't exactly abusive either, I need to be sure. I need to think this through and decide what is best for us, me and Ari."
"I can't advice you, you know that; right?" Amber reminded Helena. "But I will tell you this: you cannot live your life to the specifications of others. You need to do what is best for you and Ari, not what is best for your family or my Father."
"Can I keep in touch with you, no matter what I decide?" Helena asked. "Even if I decide to stay married to your Father?"
"You will always be the mother of my brother," Amber stated. "Yes, you can always keep in touch with me if you want to."
"Good," Helena was relieved. "If I decide to leave your Father, Ari will need someone to act as a male role model. Your James looks like a very good candidate for that; and I think Dr House could be good for Ari, too."
"Well, I agree when it comes to James," Amber mused. "Though he does have his faults too, but I'm not so sure about Dr House. He might definitely be a fun uncle to have, but as a role model – no, I don't think he would be my first choice."
"Really?" Helena was surprised. "He seemed so comfortable with Ari and he is a doctor and everything."
"Yes, he does seem to get along rather well with children," Amber agreed. "But he is a little unconventional in his ideas and he does find common courtesies a waste of time most of the time."
"Truly?" Helena wondered. "He was very nice to me."
"He apparently was in the mood," Amber surmised. "Most of the time he is somewhat rude and quite crude, too. He calls me the Cut-Throat Bitch for one."
"That's horrible!" Helena was appalled.
"Anyone else and I would agree," Amber nodded. "With House it's pretty much a compliment that he bothers to think of a nickname for you. It's difficult to explain but he is brilliant enough to get away with it. And I do like him."
"That does sound a little odd, considering," Helena pondered.
"Yeah, I know," Amber smiled. "But I have to admit we do share some characteristics and though nobody really does understand him, I think I do sometimes I come close. And he is James's best friend."
"Well he can't be all bad then," Helena smiled. "Can he?"
"No," Amber smiled back. "But neither is James quite all that good that he may appear. He is human, after all."
"I suppose we all are," Helena agreed. "That is the human condition."
Before they could get into any deeper philosophical conversation there was a knock on the door as the hotel Nanny came to watch over Ari while Helena was having dinner with Amber and friends.
"If he wakes up, do not hesitate to call for me," Helena told the Nanny. "I am, after all, just in the dining room here. Normally he does sleep the whole night through once he has fallen asleep, but this is the first time he isn't sleeping in his own bed. I don't think he will wake up, but keep an eye on him anyway. I don't want him to be scared."
"Don't worry," the Nanny responded. "I have been doing this for quite some time and I will definitely call you if anything happens."
Having settled things with the Nanny, Helena and Amber did their final checking – lipstick, powder, hair – and left the room to go to the dining room. They were joined by Wilson and almost as soon as they reached the dining room Chase and Cameron arrived, too. House and Cuddy didn't linger either, but arrived pretty much on Chase's heels.
The meal was fairly uneventful; House was for once on his best behaviour and Cameron and Amber managed to be civil to each other. James, being the peace maker he was, kept the conversation light and amusing and Cuddy, with long practice of socialising with benefactors and donors, assisted him ably. Amber was sure House gathered plenty of material for later use from the evening, but at least he refrained from commenting fresh. Once they called it a night, Wilson and Amber escorted Helena back to her room and then went to Wilson's room. Chase and Cameron had decided to stay in the bar for a night cap with House and Cuddy but Amber expected they would retire soon as well. Where House and Cuddy were going to end up that night was anybody's guess. The hospital rumour mill had speculated on their relationship for years and nobody was any the wiser over it – and Amber was fairly sure they wouldn't be any time soon either.