Chapter 32: Dippers

YrooXrksvi618 #31. Dipper's clones return! (You saw that idea already...)?Dipper's clones come back and try to replace him, but Mabel finds out and chases them away with water balloons. They survive, and...

Well, that's it! I'm gonna let you decide their fates!

Dipper was sitting around outside with Mabel, Wendy, Soos and Hot Wings. Hot Wings was asleep in a hammock he'd made out of an old torn fishing net and a half eaten blanket. Wendy sat beside him and watched Soos, Mabel, and Dipper kick a ball around. She'd been appointed Refferi in their made up game since when Hot Wings was appointed he fell asleep on the job and needed a swift replacement. The game had one rule, the ball had to keep moving and whoever let it stop lost. They were passing the ball around kicking it harder and harder to tire out their opponents the three went around until Soos eventually gave up chasing the ball and kicked it deep into the forest. While no one was looking Dipper landed in the bushes and rendered immobile in seconds. His hat soon switched for one of paper and something of his exact height stepped out from the bushes in his hat smiling brightly. Wendy saw him fall and promptly asked if he was Ok he readily and quickly responded, "Yeah, fine just slipped" Unsure she shook the sleeping man beside her but he refused to wake up. Even offering his cursed Teddy bear to get her to stop. When she realised it was pointless trying to wake him she just shrugged and went back to overseeing the game. Mabel came back running and shouting, "iT DIDN'T STOP!" as she threw the ball from hand to hand as fast as she could so it wouldn't stop and then when all the trees that could have gotten in the way were behind her she tossed the ball into the air and kicked it as hard as she could towards Dipper. He wilted like a flower and ducked out of the way. The ball bounced off the golf cart and hit Soos square in the chest where it bounced back to Dipper who again dodged it. He was not going to let that muddy ball anywhere more near his fragile feet. Or anywhere else on his body for that matter. The ball skidded to a stop and Wendy declared Dipper the loser and made him don a chicken hat Mabel had made exclusively for this game. The paper imposter was in no mood to give up the hat he'd worked hard to get so soon for such a blatant mockery of a hat if you could even call it a hat. They quickly entered the Mystery Shack and Soos downed all the water he could get Mabel rushed to the freezer and began violently chewing on ice cubes. Wendy Drank from Hot Wings' flask and glared at Hot Wings who just sneered and said, "I turned wine to water" she decided to drop him to get back at him but he landed in a chair. She sighed and handed him the flask. He took a drink and she slapped him on the back in an attempt to make him choke and by default spit out some wine. He instead just let it go down the wrong pipe and sighed the wine back into his mouth and down the correct pipe. She decided to just steal some beer from a hidden box in the kitchen Stan kept for when no one else was around. Still, she drank water. Hot Wings laughed as he finished off the flask and watched the frustrated Wendy try to soak him in the water her stolen beer had become. Another thing became blatantly obvious, "Dipper aren't you thirsty?"

"Nah I'll be fine"

"Really? You were running around the most out of all of us are the least athletic. Your body needs water Dipper"

"I don't want any!"

Muffled screams could be heard outside and they all turned to Hot Wings who yawned and pointed to a violently shaking bush outside. Hot Wings whispered something into Wendy's ear and she laughed and did as he asked. She slowly approached the Ddipper clone and gave it a quick peck on the cheek. He was almost so flustered he couldn't feel his face melting… almost. It screamed and ran out the door leaving Dipper's hat another clone rose to take his place. "You saved me!" he froze when he saw Mabel tossing a balloon up and down in her hand and saying, "If you're really Dipper you wouldn't mind one water balloon to make sure, would you?" Hot Wings snapped his fingers and a large mass of them appeared behind Mabel, "don't dodge ok. I only have*turns around* like five hundred… left" in the time it took for her to finish her threat the clone threw down the hat shouting, "Abort! Abort the mission!" and the rest of them fled from trees and bushes and rocks and stuff. Mabel began throwing the balloons wildly and relentlessly until the last clone was out of sight and ear shot. They quickly found Dipper tied up behind a bush and Mabel threw a water balloon at him to make sure. She being the one that found him, had only one witness to be sure that it was him. They all regrouped back at the Shack when Mabel announced her discovery and Dipper drank to his heart's content before everyone else came in. Hot Wings was still laughing. They all began talking and Dipper told them the whole plan the clones had bragged to him about how they were going to replace him and no one would be the wiser. But a little bit of doubt nagged at the back of Wendy's mind still he sat quietly laughing. She took that to mean that he still wasn't real and gave him a kiss on the cheek to check. A loud snort was heard and Hot Wings burst into laughter as Dipper turned bright red and Wendy too as she realised that not only had he planned this but that she didn't see it coming. So she punched his arm until they both calmed down. He fixed his shoulder and said, "so they found the manotaurs..." everyone looked at him meanwhile the clone Dippers walked up to a cave clad in rain ponchos plastic jeans rain caps and rubber boots the clones showed up and demanded to learn how to be strong.

AN: my sister informed me that it's actually three shots of 150 proof rum before the bartender cuts you off. She also agreed to buy me a flask to help me with my visual comedy. Cause I usually keep a glass bottle of coke filled with Pepsi in my inside pocket and flasks don't cost that much… too bad I couldn't get a lighter too. But free stuff can't complain.