So look whos back! First off I believe I have quite a bit of explaining to do on my long absence. Well good news is that it wasn't writers block this time. I actually had the will to right and all but didn't for a entire different list of matters. Matters that comprise of 1. me needing a break. Honestly after the pace I wrote season 2 at I was so burnt out. My brain was tired and I had no desire to write for a little while. 2. Ok so I am going to be completely honest here. I hated the way my writing was going and where it was going. Season 2 was a wreck in my opinion and in my hast to get it out (my fault I take responsibility for) I pushed aside putting out quality chapters. In my opinion I was trying way to much to stick to canon and also I started to stray away from Lance and his trauma which was the whole point of the story. Being as such I felt I needed to take a step back and really do some planning and re evaluating. I came to realize that it was ok for me to still follow canon but not write it so closely to the original. To actually have some divergence and color. So after many days I finally was at the stage where I knew I was ready. And then Hurricane Harvey happened. Living in one of the places effected by it was a little touch and go for awhile and did set me back some but me and my family are alright which is good!

So with all of this I can happily say I am rejuvenated. I'm eager to continue my story and push it to new places and explore new areas. I am sorry guys that I delayed so long and ask that you stick with me for this new journey I am going to start.

IMPORTANT NOTICE:

So with everything mentioned above chapters will be updated every Thursday. This is definitely a schedule I can stick to and work with this time. I plan to do 6 chapters that will carry us into season 4.

Thank your to KarmaDash_is_ShippingTrash, Masterliful, strawberry_milk_forever, Crazytools, APieceofSkye, lilshu65, and Ineedtoknow for your kind reviews. They have me strength and I love going back and reading them.

Also thank you to Crazytools for continuing to check up in me lol. It was very sweet of you to see if I was ok and all since I haven't updated in awhile.

But on another note if you guys get worried like that or would just like to talk hit me up on my tumblr. I check that religiously and you guys don't even have to follow me back. Because honestly I will actually responded to messages on that instead of Ao3.

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On Earth Lance use to think he could sympathize with all those hit singers who sang about getting their hearts ripped out. That they were on to something of cosmic level when they sang about finding someone like you and the ones that got away. He would sit in his small room with the glow in the dark stickers peeling off the ceiling for hours and cry at the loss these people felt. On how beautiful and poetic their words of sorrow were. To bad no one ever sang a song about being trapped in space with the person you love who it turns out doesn't trust your feelings enough to tell you what they are going through.

Having your heartbroken wasn't something romantic or beautiful. It wasn't crystal tears falling down unblemished cheeks or pastel broken hearts painted here and there. No it was more like snot and buckets of salty tears flowing down a blotched red face. Fingers tearing into strands of hair as lanky limps curled in on themselves. A body doing its best to adjust to a long unused mattress. Some days were better than others. Days were he could go about his business and pretend he wasn't bleeding out from the inside. But then there were those days when all of a sudden he could feel the ghost of lips on his neck and nails pressing into his hips. There was nothing pretty about sobs stifled into a musty pillow and bloody crescents marring tan skin in order to help hold back emotions that threatened to explode like a bomb. He wished someone would have told him back then that it was foolish to romanticize pain. That the songs and poems he thought he could relate to would never be able to cover the feelings he felt now.

Perhaps it wouldn't have ended up this way if Shiro was still there. After all the older man had offered to be there for the both of them should they ever need it. He was the oldest out of the five paladins and their leader so surely he would know how to fix the Grand Canyon size gap that was between Lance and Keith at the moment. Maybe he would have been there to help Keith with his emotions instead of him beating the drones senseless until Coran had to finally shut the program off himself. Perhaps he would have been there to lend a shoulder for Lance to cry on instead of him getting Blue's controls covered in snot and tears when the emotions became to much.

But he wasn't there. No Shiro had disappeared to who knows where and the team was in more or less shambles. It was different losing Lance than it had been losing Shiro. Yes while he was a paladin he wasn't the leader. In his opinion he wasn't nearly as important to the cause as Shiro. And if things were as bad as Keith said when he was gone then he hated to think about what they would descend into with Shiro gone.

As it was they had been searching for weeks now with no results. Shiro had all but been spirited away to who knows where. The Black lion wasn't helpful in the least bit either as they had not moved from where they were collapsed. From what they knew Black had the ability to teleport but beyond that they had no idea how it worked or what happened. For all they knew Shiro could be halfway across the universe or even worse in the hands of the Galra as Lance had been. Whatever the case was the bitter truth was that Shiro was gone and they were slowly descending into chaos.

In times like this you would look to those you loved for support and help. People you could count onto hold you through the tough times and be there for each other. Before all of this that person would have been Keith for Lance. Even for all his emotional awkwardness at times Keith knew how to comfort Lance. He knew that gentle fingers cradling skin and tender words pressed to temples usually had Lance calming down. While on the other end of the spectrum Lance knew how to calm Keith down. That gentle smiles and a head pressed into his with a nuzzling push had Keith letting the tension bleed out. They both knew what the other needed but in times like this when it was needed most no comfort was given.

After their explosive argument they had barely spoken a word to each other unless it pertained to the mission on hand. That night as they had gotten ready for the battle against Zarkon that would take place the next day, Lance found himself sitting on his bed for the first time in many months. He had of course been in his room since he returned but not once had he laid much less even sat on his bed. It was this fact that had him wrinkling his nose at the slight musty smell his pillow and sheets gave off.

He hadn't said a word to Keith about him no longer sleeping in the same room and it seemed the other was more than content to remain silent on the matter as well. Keith wasn't even in the room when Lance gathered some of the belongings he had transferred into Keith's room and instead moved them back to his own. He knew he must have noticed as he heard Keith entering his room before dinner. But he never commented on it and Lance found a small part of himself twingeing with pain. Did he not even care?

From there things only got worse as Lance no longer slept in Keith's room and the nightmares begun to return. Memories of bruises aching and cuts stinging. Blood everywhere as he slipped in it and vomit coating the floor as he heaved his insides up. A voice taunting him and having Lance screaming into his pillow with words of how he wasn't even worth Keith's love at this point. He didn't even know what was a good nights rest anymore. And from the look on Keith's face every morning neither did he.

Before all this Lance would have killed to go on a mission alone with Keith. To have him all to himself and let all his affection pour out until he was left dry. But now? Now Lance prayed every time they had to go on one that he wouldn't be paired up with Keith. However it seemed Allura was feeling merciful as she never did have them paired up.

Speaking of Allura it seemed she and Keith had made up. The thick tension that was once between them was barely even there anymore and they seemed to get along quite well actually. Lance was of course happy that now everyone on the team accepted the fact that Keith was part Galra. That he wouldn't be the outcast and hated by the team. However he couldn't help the twinge of hurt and jealously that ran through him at the fact that the very person Lance had stuck up for Keith against was on better terms with him than Lance at the moment.

He supposed it was half his fault for not making the effort to patch things up with Keith. But then again why should he have to be the one to cave? As far as he was concerned he had been more than open with Keith. He had told Keith things the others had no idea he thought or felt. Secrets whispered against soft lips in the middle of the night. And what did he get in return?

Instead of trusting Lance as he had trusted Keith the other had told everyone his secret barring Lance of course. He had hid it with every intention of not ever telling him it seemed. It still hurt Lance to think that Keith would ever think he would hate him or abandon him just because he was born a certain race. Like he could actually help it or something.

So no he did not intend to say a single word to Keith on the matter. As far as he was concerned if the other wanted to make up with him he would have to come to him first. Lance wouldn't be the first one not this time. But with everything that had happened with Shiro and knowing Keith's relationship with him, Lance doubted that would be anytime soon. At this point he didn't even know if they were broken up or not.

"How long till the drop zone?" Kolivan's voice rang out, interrupting Lance's thoughts.

"30 ticks, you ready?" Lance called back as he zoomed about.

Now was not the time to be distracted as he and Blue avoided several blasts. He had precious cargo in the form of several Blade of Mamora operatives including Kolivan after all. He would be lying if he said he wasn't relieved to go on this mission with just Hunk. He didn't think he could handle dealing with Keith and whatever weird thing he had going on with the Blade of Mamora right now.

Speaking of the Blade of Mamora everyone was more than surprised when he had volunteered to let them ride in Blue. Out of all of them they would think Lance would want to have the least amount to do with them. A thought that had him rolling his eyes. He may have trauma but he knew the Blade of Mamora had no intentions of hurting him. In fact a part of him rather liked them. Sure they were quite and a bit harsh but he could tell they did all want what as best for the universe. Not to mention Lance found Kolivan kind of amusing with his blunt sense of humor and his brutal honesty. In some way he even reminded Lance of Keith, a thought that had the former sighing in sadness.

Now was not the time for that though. He and Hunk still had quiet a few fighters swarming after them and the drop zone was no longer an option. Huffing in annoyance he banked hard to the side and hovered closer to the ground. As it was if they stopped they risked taking shots and also putting the members in danger. Pursing his lips in thought he waved off Hunk's concern over missing the drop zone. They needed another plan and fast.

"Kolivan, any ideas?" he called back but was met with surprise when the other demanded Blue's hatch be opened. Well a plan was better than no plan he supposed. He wondered if all Galra were inherently in simple terms almost reckless. If so that would sure explain why Keith was the way he was.

Opening the hatch Lance watched in awe as they zoomed towards the ground without even flinching. Although he did have to hold back a laugh when they hit the ground and started running. The freaking Naruto run, seriously?

Well Lance supposed as long as it worked it didn't matter. And considering the massive damage they were doing to the droids below, well he could overlook their unique style of running. Knowing that Kolivan and the rest could more than take care of themselves Lance turned his attention back to the battle at hand.

With Shiro gone now more than ever was the best time for Lance to learn those formations. With no Voltron battles became tougher and situations more dire. There wasn't time to think on the what ifs and the fine tuning of things. No this was war and they had to play to win.

On the nights where he wasn't wallowing in his own tears he spent hours pouring over formations. Head bent over diagrams and crude drawling's of formations illuminated only by the passing stars in the middle of the night. A good portion of his time was spent sitting behind the controls of Blue and imagining the moves in his head. Hands pushing and pulling at Blue's controls as he let his minds eye imagine the path he needed to take.

Out of all of them he was the most behind on his formations and needed to catch up. With Shiro gone they couldn't afford any set backs. Couldn't afford any mess ups or unsure paladins stumbling through battle. And that was just what he had been doing.

He had barely gotten the hang of flying Blue much less the team again when Shiro was ripped away from them. Now without a leader and one paladin who was still getting back into the groove of things they were a royal mess. If it wasn't for the fact that Keith and him had both come to the mutual idea of not speaking to each other Lance was sure he would have yelled at him in frustration by now. More than one time he had botched something up and was having a hard time figuring out what to do when fighting with the group. Did he go with formation A which had him on the safe defense or formation B which had him aggressively charging forward? He could never make up his mind and half the time he did he was wrong and somebody got shot. It had gotten to the point where he was usually sent on missions with just Hunk as of course Keith and him were not getting along and Pidge didn't have quite as much patience.

But even though it hurt to know he wasn't good enough to work with the test of the team he did admit that he worked well with Hunk. Hunk was patient and actually helped out when Lance forgot what to do. Voice somewhat nervous but still supportive as he directed Lance in formations that were new. A true friend if you asked Lance.

It got better though as the days began to creep by. Was he losing sleep? Yes, but he had caught up on a lot of the formations that were crucial to battle. He even got to perform that spiral trick with Hunk once which was exhilarating. He could catch up, he had to. And right now he had a chance to prove it with Kolivan calling for help.

Ok so it probably wasn't the best idea for Lance to have flirted with those girls but in the heat of the moment he just didn't care. If only for those few minutes he was happy to bask in the attention they gave him. To have them coo over him and crowd around him. Small, soft hands gently holding on to him as he let his own hands wonder over petite waists and smooth shoulders. It almost was enough to drive away the phantom feeling of strong, calloused hands on his waist and chapped lips pressing soft kisses onto his shoulders. Key word being almost.

He did take an almost vindictive pleasure though in the way Keith's eyes narrowed when he caught site of the photos Lance had taken as he showed them to Pidge. Good perhaps he would start to show how this fight of theirs was affecting him for once instead of bottling up everything. However the agitated side of him began to cool as the issue of Voltron was brought up.

Like dumping a cold bucket of water over all of them Keith was quick to bring up the issue they had all been putting of in some vain hope it was all a bad dream. Of course none of them had forgotten the lack of the head of their little family. It was something that they all thought of and tried to work out in the latest of hours when they were alone. But this was different than when Lance had disappeared. This time they had no lion to try and track Shiro down through nor did they even have any idea of how Shiro even vanished. Teleportation wasn't exactly a known concept the lot of them.

However before any of them could come up with reassuring words for Keith that they had not forgotten Shiro, Allura decided now would be an excellent time to drop another bomb shell on them. The words "new pilot for the black lion" bounced between them all like one of those pinball machines Lance use to spend hours on. Racking up high score after high score if only to impress his growing number of nieces and nephews.

But this wasn't something as simple as watching a small ball bounce off colorful point markers. No this was suggesting an idea none of them wanted to think about. How could they even began to entertain the idea of replacing such a valuable member. Having someone try to fill the shoes of someone like Shiro was no small order. And yes while Shiro still had many flaws as well, he did his best to be a good leader. How could any of them even hope to know where to start?

And while each of them did not quite agree with Allura's point Lance couldn't lie that Keith's next words stung a bit. " Shiro is the one person who never gave up on me. I won't give up on him," ouch ok that hit him like a punch in the gut.

However as much as Lance wanted to let his hurt from Keith's words be known a large part of him knew that Keith had some part of it right. There was quite a large chunk of Keith's life that Lance was not a part of nor had any idea of. It was that Keith obviously had no desire to share and there were times that Lance wondered if Keith even remembered everything from before the garrison. He certainly didn't act like it at times.

Taking this into account and even though it hurt Lance could see why Keith thought that. He knew that Shiro was precious to Keith and that they have some kind of history together. A history that Lance nor the rest of the team was any part of. Shiro had been with Keith through some of his toughest time and it was with that fact that Lance was able to hold his tongue. Now was not the time to involve his personal feelings. Still though he couldn't help the slight twinge in his heart when Keith stormed out of the room without another word. However he would not be going after him. Something was telling him that Keith needed to be left alone right now and besides they would see him at the dinner/meeting that was to be held soon anyway.

You know that saying "memories are made while gathered around the table"? Yeah well Lance didn't think that person had quite this kind of memory in mind before they spouted that. So far the talks hadn't been going to bad even with the slightly depressing way Kolivan had started it. Even though he could tell that the leaders sitting across from him were still unsure he could at least see the cogs in their minds working. Hope and awe shining in their eyes as Allura presented her ideas. The only unfortunate part to this all so far was the fact that Lance was seated next to Keith. At least they were reasonably spaced out and not pressed together.

To bad it was not to last though. The irritation and anger that rolled off Keith in waves reminded Lance of that time when Keith slaughtered all those Galra. It sat heavy over him like a cloud and Lance could almost taste it. Taste the bitterness and crackle of fury that broiled under Keith's skin. It may not be as bad as in the past but Lance knew it was still a threat to the talks right now.

Gingerly reaching out Lance was careful in placing what he hoped was a placating hand on Keith's elbow. To bad it seemed to do nothing except irritate Keith even more as he not so gently yanked his elbow away and cast Lance a venomous look in return. Great this appeared to be heading down hill and quickly at that.

As the dinner continued though he didn't back down in his efforts to get Keith to relax. A gentle nudge here and a light caresses on his side there with hope that Keith would start to cool down. However those did not work nor anything else. All it did was earn Lance quite the death stares and even a heel digging into his foot. Damn he had forgotten their paladin boots had a slight heel to them.

It all continued to escalate though until it seemed Keith could no longer hold his temper. If it wasn't for the fact that he was in the process of rubbing his sore foot Lance mused that maybe he would have been able to stop Keith. Actually who was he kidding? The bruise that was surely forming on his foot proved that even he couldn't sway Keith's emotions any longer.

Still even with the reality of the situation he couldn't just watch Keith storm out of the room and do nothing about it. Seeing the bemused expressions that faced him across the table and Allura's own one of fear that all their hard work had just been tossed down the drain Lance was quick to act.

"Please excuse him he's been going through a lot," Lance offered to the leaders with an apologetic smile. Cheering in his mind when they relaxed and some even nodded their heads in understanding.

Pushing aside his instinct to bolt after Keith himself he slowly rose from his seat before turning to face Allura. "I'll go talk to him," he said as he smiled a reassuring smile at her. Weary but trusting Allura nodded her head before addressing the others again. Turning to leave he begun to make his way out of the room as calmly as he could, unaware of the pair of yellow eyes that followed him out the door as he went.

As soon as he heard the doors hiss shut behind him though all allusions of calm dissipated as Lance hurried after Keith. Face set in a determined scowl as he sped up. If he thought for one second that he was going to be able to throw a tantrum and get away with it he had another thing coming. Rounding the corner Lance narrowed his eyes as he spotted Keith slowly making his way down the hallway. He caused such a big fuss and now he had the audacity to be calm? Oh no not while Lance saw to it.

Calling out the others name he was relieved when Keith decided to actually stop instead of ignoring him. However that relief soon turned to apprehension as Keith turned to face him with one of the biggest scowls he had ever seen. Oh boy here they go.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Keith asked, curt and straight to the point.

Pausing for only the briefest of moments Lance did his best to hide the unease he felt. Keith's tone already did not bode well for where this conversation was going to go. It was more than clear that it would not be a peaceful talk like Lance wished for. No this would surely be a taxing and emotional one. One that may put even further strain on their relationship. But he couldn't leave the other like this either. No it was time to face whatever this was.

"Keith come on don't be like that," he tried to reason as he took a step closer to Keith.

That of course seemed to not help the situation any as Keith only narrowed his eyes at him in response. Frown drawling his eyebrows together as his lips curled up in a sneer.

"Mind your own business Lance," Keith growled back as he turned to leave.

Lance was having none of that though as he stepped forward once again. "Uh last time I checked you're little tantrum effects the whole team making it not only mine but everyone else business," he shot back, fists clenched in frustration.

However Keith said nothing to this as he made to leave. It seemed he was more than content to ignore Lance and the problem at hand. Which of course was something the other could not allow.

"Keith I know your upset about Shiro but you can't keep running away from all of this," he tried to reason, hoping a more gentle tone would bring Keith around.

It seemed not though as Keith spit back, "Oh what would you know Lance? You have no idea what I'm going through!"

Taken aback Lance visibly took a step back at Keith's biting words but managed to recover quickly. He wouldn't drop this that easily. " I might if you actually told me or any of us for that matter! How are we suppose to help you if you never say anything?" it was hard to keep the frustration from bleeding into his tone but somehow he managed if only by a little.

"Why am I the problem here? As far as I'm concerned I'm not the one trying to replace Shiro so easily," Keith accused as his voice started to raise.

Lance couldn't help but shake his head in disbelief. Keith wasn't seeing the big picture here. " That's not it and you know it!"

"Oh please, last time I checked I was the only one out there looking for him," Keith scoffed. His face a mask of bitter amusement.

This only had Lance growling in frustration as he responded, " Keith we can't just ignore everything else around us either. It can't be like it was when I was gone, the team can't take something like that again."

If Lance was any angrier he might have missed the flash of sorrow that crossed Keith's face at the mention of those 4 long months. Sure it was a low blow but Lance needed him to see the point here. To see that obsessing over this like they did for Lance would only destroy the team even more.

However any ground he thought he might have gained with Keith quickly vanished as the other became defensive. " It wont be like with you Lance trust me. This time I actually wont give up halfway," he sneered.

Lance would be lying if he said that wasn't a blow to his heart. He swore he could feel it breaking even more with those cruel, biting words. Deep down he knew Keith didn't mean them. That he was enraged and distressed, looking for anything to lash out at. Like the fire he was guardian of Keith burned bright with whatever emotion he felt at the moment. Let his feelings consume him and roar to life with a passion. And right now that emotion was bitterness and contempt. And while Lance knew this it didn't stop him from fighting back with his own tidal wave of emotions.

" Uh huh, like that worked out so well for you the first time you tried to find him," he jeered.

It seemed Keith did not like this oh no he didn't like it one bit as he slowly turned back to face Lance fully, jaw clenched and eyes contracting in anger. Desire to get away long forgotten as he advanced towards Lance who did his best to square up and stand his ground. Stopping only a few feet away from the other Keith used his recent growth spurt to glare down at Lance. This only had Lance glaring harder at the mere fact that Keith was trying to intimidate him into submission.

"You're not going to cow me into backing down Keith. I'm not intimidated by you," Lance warned as he met Keith's glare head on. Wishing to himself that with his words Keith would back off.

However this had the opposite effect Lance wanted as Keith crowded him and flashed him what could only be described as a predatory smirk. "Oh I think you are Lance. After all as I seem to recall you're the one who fled back to your room without even a word," Keith taunted, his eyes glinting with an almost mocking edge.

Scowling at Keith for trying to make him out as a coward Lance continued to stand his ground. Keith may be taller than him now and a force to be reckoned with when he was angry but Lance wasn't a push over either. Though his heart did clench at the fact that Keith was willing to land such a unfair blow by bringing their relationship into this. Was he really ok with stepping all over his feelings like this?

"Alright then, if that makes me a coward then what does that make you? Considering you were the one who was afraid to tell me your part Galra and all that," Two could play at this game.

Any pleasure that Lance got from Keith's shock was taken away though when the other let out a borderline predatory growl. He could only watch as Keith bared his teeth and all but pushed his face closer to him. Eyes flashing with more than mere anger at this point.

"See this is exactly why I didn't want to tell you anything," he growled.

This however was the last string for Lance as he couldn't keep it quite together at Keith's words. " Oh so its ok for you to keep things from me because you don't want to hear it, because you're afraid?! And then on the other hand you insist that I be honest with you with everything I feel! How is that fair Keith?!" Lance exclaimed.

This took Keith aback for the moment but he recovered fast. " How was I suppose to tell you Lance? Hey I come from a race of people who also happened to be the same as the one who tortured you. How could I put something like that on you?"

"The same way I told you everything I went through Keith! My love for you is unconditional no matter what your background is. I trusted you to be honest with me as I have to you," Lance said as he watched Keith scowl in frustration.

"That's easy for you to say. I've never done this before Lance!" Keith yelled in anger as his temper continued to build. Lance's comment on his love for him being drowned out by all his other emotions.

"And you think I have? I told you that you were the first person I ever dated! But unlike you I'm trying Keith. You told me you loved me but how can you say that when you don't even respect me enough to tell me the truth? What would Shiro say?"

Ok yes it was a bad move to bring Shiro in to this especially since he was part of what they were arguing about but Lance couldn't help it. He never wanted to argue about their relationship. No now was not the time for that but he couldn't stop himself when Keith brought it up. His hurt was still to raw and he was never the best at holding his tongue. It seemed though that he wasn't the only one though.

"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!" Keith roared as he grabbed Lance by the arms and shook him almost as if he was a rag doll. Wide eyed Lance clamped his mouth shut as he looked at Keith in utter shock. The other panting and wearing a similar expression as he looked at Lance. By now their faces were mere inches away from each other as they stared into each others eyes in stunned silence.

It soon transformed into something else though as they begun to calm down. Loosening his grip on Lance's arms Keith let his eyes drift down to his lips as his eyes became hooded. Breath still coming out in pants as everything zeroed in on Lance. The other wasn't doing much better either as his eyes too drifted to Keith's lips. God how long had it been since they had kissed each other? But before either of them could act on their rampant emotions Keith managed to regain himself and pulled back.

"I'm sorry I cant do this, not now," was all he offered as he turned and sped away. Leaving Lance to stand there in a mix of sadness and surprise.

Even after Keith turned the corner at the end of the hall he still did not move from his spot. No all he could do was stand there as he tried not to cry. By this point everything was a mess. Shiro was gone and he and Keith's relationship might as well be void at this point. For once in his life why couldn't he have what he wanted. He was always fighting to be acknowledged and earn his place and when he thought he had finally found his place while working everything out it had all been yanked out from under him. Life truly loved to be cruel to him as he sniffed and tried to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over.

So caught up in his emotions he was though that he missed the sound of soft footfalls approaching him. It wasn't until a large hand came to rest gently on his shoulder that he realized he wasn't alone any longer. Wiping his eyes he turned only to be met with confusion when he came face to face with Kolivan. Ok not who he was suspecting to show up.

" Forgive me if I startled you paladin," he said as he removed his hand from his shoulder.

Sniffling Lance shook his head as he turned fully to face the other. "Nah its ok. Can I help you with something?"

"Ah… I normally do not meddle in such affairs but I felt that I needed to have a word with the Red paladin myself. However it seems that would not be for the best," Kolivan hedged as he regarded the path Keith had disappeared down.

Wincing at the implication of Kolivan's words Lance rubbed the back of his head in a almost sheepish manner, " Heard all that did you?"

"Yes I'm afraid. I did not mean to eavesdrop though young paladin," Kolivan informed him as he turned to face him once again.

Not being able to help the smile that spread across his face at Kolivan's polite honesty Lance shook his head. "It's alright since we were the ones arguing in the middle of the hallway. Sorry you had to see all of that though…oh and by the way you can just call me Lance! I mean we call you by your name so its only fair."

"Its quite alright…Lance," Lance couldn't help the broad smile that spread across his face as Kolivan used his name. In truth he actually thought the dude was pretty cool and was more than happy to grow closer as comrades with the older man. Though even with a happy moment such as this it did little to sooth the ache left by Keith.

Not sure of what else to say Lance went back to staring at the ground, eyes burning with un shed tears of sadness and frustration at the situation. If it wasn't for Kolivan standing before him he was sure he would have started crying at any moment. As it was he was barely keeping it together.

However nothing prepared him for the gentle hand that came to rest on his head. Looking up in question Lance could only look at Kolivan in confusion as the other gingerly patted his head. Even though he wasn't smiling there was something soft in his expression as he regarded Lance.

"It is not weak to cry believe me. In fact at times it is how the heart speaks when the lips will not," Kolivan said in a soft tone as he continued to pat Lance's head in a almost awkward manner.

Oh and if that didn't get the tears flowing Lance didn't know what would. Doing his best to wipe away his cascade of tears he let out a watery laugh as he regarded Kolivan. "I had no idea any of you Marmorites could be so poetic."

Tilting his head at the nickname Lance had taken to calling them Kolivan shrugged in response. "If you wish to call it that however I am only stating facts,"

"Mmhmm sure," Lance teased as he sniffled up the last of his tears.

For a moment neither one of them said anything but Kolivan was quick to break the silence as he watched Lance look forlornly in the direction Keith had vanished to. "He will grow out of it one day I assure you. Galra tend to be quite aggressive in their youth."

"To be honest I think that's Keith just being Keith," Lance snorted.

" While that may be true he reminds me of many of our younger recruits. Brash and quick to anger. He will have to grow out of it sooner or later."

Lance merely hummed in response as he thought on Kolivan's words. When he thought about it, it did make sense. Keith tended to be quite aggressive even for a human. There was also the growl that came out of him earlier that had Lance flinching. Perhaps it was the Galra side of him that pushed him to be more inclined to irritation and fits of rage. Then again who knew with Keith since he seemed not to ever tell anyone anything.

"At this rate I don't know what to do," Lance sighed. Maybe he wasn't the right person to talk with Keith about any of this. It was clear that their relationship was part of his emotional turmoil and it wasn't something Lance was sure they could overcome this time. Not with someone as important as Shiro missing at the moment.

"It may not be ideal but I believe you may have to be the bigger person in this Lance. It is clear he needs support and your opinion does sway heavily with him even though he does not show it."

Turning to face Kolivan once again Lance raised a questioning eyebrow at this. Were he and Kolivan even talking about the same person because from what he had seen Keith did not seem to inclined to listen to him.

Seeing Lance's doubt Kolivan decided to elaborate, "At our headquarters you were constantly on his mind. His desire to protect and please you was quite obvious I must admit."

This had Lance blushing as Keith's feelings were laid bare before him. Considering the other didn't talk about what happened that day Lance had no idea. To hear that even Kolivan who was a stranger at the time could identify Keith's feelings for him had Lance's temper rapidly cooling. Of course things wouldn't be fixed with something like that but still it did help Lance regain his calm and perhaps move past this if only a little.

Smiling at Kolivan's words of reassurance Lance couldn't help but ask, " Not to be ungrateful or anything but why are you being so nice to me?"

For a moment Kolivan said nothing to this as he seemed to be thinking. Head tilted a fraction to the left as he thought. Lance had to hold back a giggle as it almost reminded him of a cat. The fluffy parts that stuck out on the sides of Kolivan's head didn't help any either.

"I am returning the favor from earlier at the village," Ah that made sense. But to Lance it was only natural as the Blade of Mamora had helped a great deal against the Galra soldiers. They deserved as much praise as Voltron did any day in Lance's opinion.

"That is not the only reason though," Kolivan admitted soon after though.

Curious Lance said nothing as he waited patiently for the other to go on. Taking his silence as the go ahead Kolivan did just that.

" At times you remind me of one of our operatives Thace. He too was quite caring and did his best to look after others."

It took a moment for Lance to place the name but after a moment he realized it was the man who saved them from the Galra before the wormhole and also the one who made their fight against Zarkon possible. A man who had nobly sacrificed himself for the bigger picture even though he probably had dreams and aspirations himself . To be told he reminded Kolivan of such a great man had Lance standing a little taller with pride. That was quite a lot to live up to.

"That's nice of you," he finally settled on saying as he fiddled with his fingers in a bashful manner.

"It will get better. Strife and darkness do not last forever," Kolivan said, hand coming to pat Lance on the head in reassurance once more.

Smiling at this Lance leaned into the touch while saying nothing more. He prayed Kolivan was right and that he could live up to the high expectation now placed upon him.

Lance wanted to stay mad at Keith he really did. Wanted to let his anger burn like a raging fire for days. Let it consume him and burn away all other emotions he felt for the other. But he couldn't do that. No he needed to calm himself. Like a raging sea he would calm the waters of his emotions. Let the waters settle so everything would become clear and even the biggest disturbance would not change anything. He needed to be the bigger person.

It wasn't only that though. No, it stemmed farther than wanting to be the bigger person in this. No matter how much Keith angered him or hurt him he did not think he would ever stop caring for the other. Oh and by God did he love him. He craved him from the most heated form to the purest of forms. Long since he had stopped being able to tell the difference between his heart and Keith. Were they even separate entities to him by now? He was the one thing he would choose over and over again. In a heartbeat without question. It was no longer a question in his mind, he know knew he would never love like this again.

Being as such it hurt to watch Keith try to shoulder all this alone. His posture tense as he stood facing the Black lion. They had all found him that morning after the dinner. Lost in thought as he regarded the unresponsive lion before them. He had not said a word to any of them since they had all entered and the same could be said the other way as well. After all where did they even began?

It was almost funny the way they all looked to Lance. Of course in their minds he would be the best for the job even though he and Keith were currently not speaking to each other. However Lance wasn't even paying attention to the rest of them. No he was focused solely on one person and had already decided what to do himself.

Taking a deep breath he approached the other before stopping at his side. Close by still mindful to keep some distance between them. He could never hope to know all that Shiro meant to Keith which made it difficult for him to settle on some kind of words of comfort. And he thought confessing his feelings was hard.

But it appeared he wasn't alone in this. Pidge and Hunk had plenty to contribute as they spoke of what Shiro meant to them. The awe and love they felt for the older man radiating out as they spoke of him. And while Keith didn't seem quite happy with Lance's advice the other could see he at least acknowledged it. His eyes softening as he regarded Lance in thought.

And the moment mentions of reforming Voltron left Keith's mouth he felt himself renewed with hope. It may not be quite what any of them wanted but it was a start. They could work with this and grow. Things would not be like when he was gone, they couldn't be. And while he wanted nothing more to work out every sore spot in his and Keith's relationship, now was not the time. No, for now he needed to be there for Keith and frankly their relationship would need to be pushed aside for the time being. This didn't mean his love would weaken or vanish by any means. Instead he would focus on growing in this aspect of their team and lives. Even if all he wanted right now was to be held in Keith's arms he would push it aside. Anything to make sure they all made it through this. Someone had to be the anchor after all and even if he was the most beat up, ugly looking one in the harbor he was more than happy to fulfill that job. Anything for them.

So some notes on this chapter. I am sure some of you are wondering why I skipped the last town episodes of season 2. The answer is 1. I did not have the motivation and was unhappy with my writing and 2. I did not feel they were necessary. With everything going on I did not think Lance nor Keith would have time to think of anything else. Is it lazy on my part? Yes but it is what I have decided and who knows, I may go back and change it one day but for now I am very pleased with how this chapter turned out.

Ok so on the scene with Kolivan and Lance. All I have to say is you guys can fight me on this but I LOVE the idea of platonic, mentor, roll model thing Kolivan could be for Lance. I don't know why but I could just see their interactions being hilarious and sweet. So yeah I out that in their and you guys can fight me on it.

I believe that's all I have for notes on this chapter. If you guys have any questions feel free to ask on here or if you want you can ask them privately on tumblr through my messages. I really hope everyone enjoyed this chapter.

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