Chapter 36 – Determination

His awareness came back a little while ago. He still had to open his eyes though, but at the moment he was still too tired to do that. Not mentioning all the thoughts running through his mind he still had to sort through.

His head had started to hurt like hell during his chase after a certain blonde beast. It was one of his worst headaches. Maybe not THE worst, but it came pretty close to it. Coming to a stop after cornering the beat hadn't given him the relief he was hoping for. On the contrary, it felt like it was hitting him now with full force.

The pain had made him careless, loosened up his tongue. He was so stupid! He could only hope now that Shizu-chan was too stupid to get his sort-of-confession. Sadly though, he knew from experience that the protozoan evolved whenever he wasn't supposed too.

But this wasn't the worst of all. No, as if adding insult to injury Izaya had a long, detailed dream after he had blackened out. Or... should he rather call it a memory?

He was screwed. So totally screwed!

The ravenette remembered everything. Izaya wasn't just unconscious from taking a hit on the head. Sure, it may have been the main reason for his state, but his only friend had also messed around with him. Turned him into a cat and had his nemesis look after him. He forgot himself on so many occasions. Acted on his instinct only, seeking out closeness with the ex-bartender and doing stuff he'd never dared to do but wished upon happening on so many occasions.

Screw it all! How shall he face the man ever again?! He knew it! There was no doubt in the informant's mind that Shizu-chan now knew about his feelings. The feelings he had buried long time ago, building several brick walls around their grave so they could never be dug up again.

Leave it to Heiwajima fucking Shizuo to break down those walls and digging around in the mess known as Orihara Izaya. The man certainly had no class whatsoever.

What was he supposed to d- "Wakey, wakey, O~ri~ha~ra~ku~n!" Leave it to Shinra to interrupt him in the middle of something that could be an up coming break-down.

"Oh come on. I know you're back with us again. Your breathing is not that of an unconscious man."

"Shut up, Sensei." he grumbled, voice a little heavy from the exhaustion his body still felt. " 'm trying to think here." he spoke with a heavy voice. A finger softly pressed against the space between his brows.

"That frown here tells me it's more like an up coming break-down than just trying to think." Screw that doctor and his insight.

The info-broker sighed. "Are the lights out?" he asked. Shinra's answer was an affirmative hum. Upon opening his eyes, Izaya had to shut them again immediately. Sure, the lights where out, just as the doctor had told him, but that still didn't mean the sun would be blocked by curtains.

"Fuck you, Shinra!" Izaya cursed gaining a laugh from his longest friend.

"Your swearing sounds more like a helpless kitty hissing at me." the doctor mindlessly spoke.

Another attempt to open his eyes, slowly this time, had Izaya glaring at the underground doctor, but soon a sadistic mask slipped over his face.

"I have good news for you. I remembered everything again and according to that I'll take my sweet time to think about a fitting revenge." The smile Izaya gave the glasses wearing male looked so innocent, that it had the man swallow in fear of what it meant for him.

-o-o-o-o-

"Shi-zu-oh! How's puberty going?" the Russian's greeting as he entered the restaurant, slightly ticked the blonde man off. He was already on edge, waiting for Izaya to wake up once again so he could confront him with their feelings for each other. This time he wouldn't take the flea's shit-talking. He would strip him of all those stupid masks and lay Izaya bare before him. No lies, no games, only true honesty.

"Shut it, Simon. I'm not here for your stupid nonsense. Just take my order and make it to-go." he growled itching for a cigarette. Celty had, in a well-meaning way of course, thrown him out of their apartment. She had nicely asked of him to go and pick up some take away food for all of them. Saying she had a rough day and was too tired too cook and too scared to leave the house with all the street cops out there. She also meant it would be good on him to get out of for a bit.

To clear his head and stuff like that. Up until now it hadn't done anything to get his mind off from a certain raven haired informant.

"What will it be today?" Denis' voice broke through his thoughts. "Ah, right. Yellow tail, today's special and fatty tuna." he ordered from the chef, which was followed by a high pitched scream from behind. As Shizuo turned around he saw three very familiar figures sitting at a table, seemingly waiting for their meal.

"Did you hear that?!" the girl squealed. "Shizu-Shizu ordered fatty tuna! Isn't that Iza-Iza's favorite?! I bet hw-hmph!" She was silenced by her fellow otaku's hand against her mouth.

"Kadota." the blonde greeted his old classmate, before noticing the lack of one face in their little group. "Weren't there four of you?"

The beanie wearing man sighed. "Don't worry about him. Just the usual break down about his van." "Caused by him and Orihara." the light haired half-Japanese mumbled under his breath. Shizuo frowned and was about to open his mouth to question the other on that, when Kadota spoke up again.

"What was that with you and Izaya today? Never saw your usual chase the other way around."

The blush creeping up on the blonde's face was hard to miss. By the time his left hand began rubbing at his neck thinking of what to answer, the brown haired woman had freed herself from her companion, holding both his hands in a strong grip to keep him from silencing her once again.

"It was a lovers spat, right? And now you're getting him his favorite sushi to get back on his good side, right?" her eyes sparkled as she looked at his stunned face.

"Erika!" both her companions reprimanded her.

Her words had surprised Shizuo, or maybe he wasn't all that surprised as he would have been only a week ago. Looks like his fear came true. His feelings for the louse were that obvious for everyone around them. And judging by Erika's words, the raven's feelings also seemed to be obvious. Only they were oblivious to what the other truly felt for the other. But that was over now. He had told Izaya about his true feelings, and he would get the other to talk to him about his own. Shizuo was determined to change their current status-quo.

"I'm sorry, Shizuo. She-" the carpenter started to form an apology, but got interrupted by the bodyguard. "We aren't like that." he spoke with an unusual calm voice. His face looked serious rather than angered which shut up everyone around him.

"Well, at least not until we talked this out." he confessed.

The chef had a slight smile on his face as he nodded and worked on Shizuo's order. Simon, who was bringing over the food for the three members of the van-gang, smiled all over his face. He set down the meal before them then proceeded to give the blonde a friendly clap on the shoulder.

"Growing out of puberty. Good. For you red rice for celebrating only half price." Shizuo was so close to punch his face, when Kadota Kyohei found his voice again.

"W-Wait! Shizuo, you don't mean you..." he trailed off not sure if he truly was about to affirm the rightness of what his fujoshi comrade always insisted on.

That Heiwajima Shizuo, of all people, truly was in love with Orihara Izaya. Somehow that didn't sound so wrong to him. Maybe deep inside him, he always had that suspicion. Still doesn't mean it wasn't surprising.

The living symbol for anger issues nodded shyly, which also was a totally new sight for all the witnesses. The blonde looked at his shoes while scratching his cheek.

"Stuff happened and I confessed to him. Flea's full of shit and all. I have to get him to talk so we can sort through his mess before we can be a thing.

Two pairs of eye got wide and jaws dropped. Erika was fanning both her hands before her face.

"I..." she started. "I think I'm gonna faint from bliss!" Dramatically she threw a hand to her forehead, closing her eyes and falling back in her seat. Walker catching her before she could slip up and crash to the floor. She wasn't lying. Her features looked as blissfully as can be.

-o-o-o-o-