Ike asks his gay brother for advice on girls.

Characters: Kyle Broflovski, Ike Broflovski

Kyle's 16 and Ike's 10. I uploaded the wrong oneshot last time, I updated it and previewed it, but can you please leave a review on it just so that I'm certain that the issue was fixed.

Advice for Ike

"So there's this girl at school."

Kyle swallowed the chunk of his burger that he was chewing, "Okay."

"How did you know that you liked Stan as more than a friend?"

Kyle thought for a minute to give his brother a proper answer, "When I wanted him to be more than my Super Best Friend."

"How did you get him to like you?" Ike asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Like, when did you get him to be your boyfriend?"

It occurred to Kyle that he wouldn't have told Ike this, as intelligent as Ike was, he wouldn't understand at his young age.

"It's… a bit weird."

"Tell me."

"Stan had pussied out of kissing Wendy and so we decided to try out a relationship," Kyle shrugged, "I didn't actually like him like that for about two months. Why?"

"I think I like this girl."

Kyle took another bite of his burger, "So?"

Ike sighed exasperatedly, "Could you give me advice?"

"Nope," Kyle said, sounding very bored, "Stan's my first real relationship. The only girl who I actively pursued became a whore after I kissed her once."

"Can you at least try?"

Kyle looked up thoughtfully, "I guess."

Ike looked at him expectantly.

"Obviously, be yourself. If the girl's going to like you, it'll be for you, not what you're trying to be."

Ike nodded.

"You're only ten, don't go too out of your way for this girl."

"Why not?"

"Because you'll lose your friends."

"Oh."

"If I were you," Kyle continued, "I'd hold off to be honest. Relationships when you're ten mean fuck all. Stan went out with Wendy and now he likes dick."

Ike laughed, "Fair point."

"Relationships should be left until you're older, what if you find out that you're gay? Hell, Stan or I could have realised that we were straight when we first got together!"

"That would have been awkward."

"Maybe for a while, but we promised each other that it wouldn't get in the way of our friendship if it didn't work out. Obviously that wouldn't work now and I'm pretty sure that we both accept that it would never be the same."

Ike nodded.

"Look, if you do get with her, no sex."

"I'm ten."

"You fucked your teacher when you were three. Don't try that shit. I don't want to have to stop you from committing suicide again."

Ike swallowed thickly.

"I'm serious."

"Okay, I'll wait 'til I'm older."

"I would agree with Chef and say seventeen, but I was fourteen so I can't really get on your case for that."

"Fourteen?"

Kyle nodded, "Summer before high school. It was our first anniversary."

Ike stared down at his food, briefly wondering why he had asked Kyle to go to Sizzler's instead of Shakey's, "What's it like to be in love?"

Kyle sighed, a fond look in his eyes, "Do you really want to know? You're a bit young to be caring about this and it's going to get really sappy and gross."

"Tell me anyway," Ike smiled.

"It's the best feeling ever, but it's also the worst if you're apart. At the same time, you know that they'll be there at the end of the day and when you've had a bad day, just seeing them makes it better."

"Keep going," Ike coaxed.

"When I was a bit younger, I became really self-conscious. I'm short, I'm scrawny, I have a really short temper, I have two huge scars on my body, I have this on my head," He pulled his hat off and pointed to his hair before replacing it, "I used to be good at hiding it, but Stan loves all of that. Because he loves all of those flaws, I've become a lot more confident in myself and I'm proud of who I am."

"He's done a lot for you," Ike noted.

"He was with me during the worst time of my life and he stuck by me the whole time."

"When?"

"After I got kicked out," Kyle explained, "I was a wreck. I didn't go to school, I barely ate, I didn't shower and I absolutely reeked. Stan stayed with me, he made me eat so I didn't go into a diabetic coma, he made me take my immunosuppressant meds, he held me when I cried even though I stank, he argued with me when I called myself worthless and so pathetic that my own ma hated me. That means so much to me and it did back then too, when I was hurting and I needed to feel loved and wanted, he provided it."

"Remind me to thank him for it."

Kyle laughed, but it sounded hollow, like the memory brought a dark cloud over him, "Sorry to get all deep and personal on you there."

"Don't worry about it, I asked the question," Ike shrugged, "Sorry if I touched a nerve."

"It's fine," Kyle smiled, "So, did you play the new Splatoon update?"

Here's a question for you guys too. What's your favourite oneshot so far? Mine is probably Coming Out, The Boyfriend Tag or the two Cuddles ones. I should probably clarify, Kyle has to take immunosuppressants because of his kidney transplant and it's one the reasons he's sick so often (that and his diabetes), that's my headcanon and I'm sticking to it.