Hello !
Title : Misery Business
Genre : Drama, Romance.
Disclaimer : I don't own the characters unfortunately. They are the property of HBO and Charlaine Harris ! I only own my OC, Elizabeth Adams.
Chapter 33 : Too Late To Apologize
We left Fangtasia quickly and arrived somewhere around Shrevport. No one was talking and especially not me. I was afraid to talk because I could see the anger in Godric's eyes. Was it because of me or because of what happened minutes before. I couldn't be sure but I think that my attitude hadn't helped… He was probably angry because of everything and for once I was afraid of him, of what he could do. I was scared of losing him.
When I thought about what had happened, I was feeling awfully guilty. I was just a bitch towards Godric but I couldn't help myself. I wasn't trying to find any excuse because I knew that I deserved everything that was happening to me. If I was just a little bit more relaxed, if I could just show him how much I cared about him… Everything would be easier and I wouldn't hurt him… I wouldn't be afraid of losing him every time. Would Godric forgive me again for what I had done ? He must be tired of forgiving me, of listening to my ridiculous apologies.
The worst thing was that if I had listened to him, I wouldn't have been silvered by The Magister, I wouldn't have been involved with Eric's business and Godric would have never come to save me. How could he forgive me for that ? Of course, Fangtasia should have been a safe place but it wasn't… However, I couldn't really blame Eric.. Of course, selling vampire blood wasn't a very good idea but I could tell that Eric had been forced to do it and he had tried to save me or at least he wanted to, I think.
I was still wondering why Eric accepted to do this for his Queen. He was a very old vampire, why was he obeying a Queen who was probably younger than him ? It was still a mystery for me and I really wanted to find out. I was also wondering if Godric knew about Eric's issues. If he knew he could have helped him, after all he was probably one of the oldest vampire alive ! No Queen could resist him, no one could resist him. But what if he didn't know anything ? How was he going to react ? What was he going to do to Eric ? I truly hoped that he wouldn't do anything, I was concerned over Eric strangely…
" What the hell were you thinking Eric ? How could you have let this happen ? " Godric screamed as his fangs dropped. He didn't seem to know… Poor Eric.
" I had everything under control Godric ! I wouldn't have let anything happen to Elizabeth. " Eric replied calmly. A small smile appeared on my face, Eric cared about me in his own, he would have tried to help me and I was believing him. If Godric hadn't come, he would have intervened. He wasn't lying.
" I wasn't talking about that, I don't care. "
His words hit me right in the heart. Was he really serious ? Did he mean what he had just said ? I wasn't the only one who was shocked, Eric shot me a glance full of compassion… He probably didn't understand his maker.
Godric just didn't care about me anymore, I had pushed him too far. I had lost him because of me stupidity. How could I have been so blind ? I should have seen it coming, Godric was not like Arthur, he was not patient like Arthur was with me because I was his child.
I wanted to run away, far away from him and from my heartbreak. I couldn't stay here with him. He had every reason to hate me, to push me away, to reject me but I just couldn't accept it. I had lost him, I had lost the only person who cared about me, who loved me… What would I do now ? Going to Jackson was starting to be a very good idea… The only issue was that my legs weren't moving, I was frozen… It was like I couldn't control myself anymore… I was completely numb…
" I had to sell this blood, it's Sophie-Ann's. I had no choice Godric. I knew what I was doing, you know you can trust me. Now, I'm going to Jackson, I'm bringing Bill back. I will also try to find a way to take care of Russell once I'm there. I will save my Child and everything will be okay again. I know what I'm doing, Godric. " Eric said as he started to pace back and forth.
" I trust you Eric but I'm worried for you ! I don't want to lose my Child and I don't want you to lose Pam. I know how much you care about her, I wish I could have done something for her. " Godric answered as he approached his Child and stopped him.
Pam, when I thought about her, I was glad to be here… I didn't want to be in her position, if I was being honest. Of course, taking her place had crossed my mind but it was definitely stupid. I could be more useful here…
" You couldn't have done anything, Godric. " Eric stated as he put his hand on his maker's shoulders. I would have laughed at their height difference but I just couldn't do anything but stared blankly at them. If only I could leave… " I'm leaving now, I've already lost too much time. " Godric nodded and Eric flew away, leaving me completely alone with Godric.
No, I just couldn't stay with. I needed to leave really. My body had to obey me and it did but I didn't get too far because Godric had grabbed me by the shoulders, stopping me.
" You are not leaving, Elizabeth. We need to talk. " Godric ordered.
That was something we didn't need to do, no… I had perfectly understood everything. It was crystal clear, he didn't want me anymore, he didn't care about me. I didn't why he wanted us to talk, there was nothing to say. I had enough of this situation and I didn't know how long I could hold my tears because I could feel myself slowly losing control.
Why was he torturing me like that ? Why was he so cruel ? I knew I had hurt him, I knew I probably deserved everything but why couldn't he just let me go ? I couldn't deal with him right now. I had to deal with this new pain and that was enough… My heart was broken, completely broken.
" Let me go, please. " I begged him, my voice was trembling and I was on the verge of tears.
" I won't do this because you need to listen to what I'm going to say. " His tone was cold, awfully cold.
" This is all my fault, Arthur. How could I have let this happen ? My sister… She… She's going to die because of me. " William Adams said to his vampire friend as he hit the nearest wall and moaned in pain.
He knew he shouldn't have gotten involved with Russell Edgington's business. He knew he had made too many mistakes but he had never thought his sister could get hurt because of him. Russell Edgington was a monster, he was using an innocent girl to get what he wanted.
William felt guilty, more than guilty in fact. He should have been the one laying on a bed, he should be the one fighting against a fever.
The only thing he could do now was prying and searching for a way to save her. He couldn't go to Russell and ask him stop what he was doing because he knew there was nothing he could say that would stop him. He could only ask for his friend's help, though he wasn't sure that was a good idea. William didn't want Lizzie to be a vampire, he wanted her alive, with a heartbeat. Maybe Arthur could find a way to help her without turning her, after all he was very old. And if he had no other choice then he would let him turn her. He only wanted him to turn her and not his father's friend…
" You're not the one to blame. You couldn't have done anything, you know Russell. I wish I could help you. "
" I know I'm the one to blame. Arthur, is there something you can do for her ? Can't you find a cure ? " He asked, hoping that the answer was yes.
Arthur unfortunately shook his head. He knew there was nothing he could do. He also knew that his vampire blood wasn't going to work, simply because William had told him about Godric. If his nearly two thousand years old blood wasn't working, Arthur knew his wouldn't do anything.
William fell on his knees, crying. " I killed my sister. "
" No, you didn't. She's still alive isn't she ? "
Of course, she was alive but soon she would be dead, because of Russell or because of Godric. This simple thought made William's blood ran cold. His father's friend was going to turn her sister, he was going to be her maker and William knew what kind of relationship she would have with him. It was just so evident and he couldn't accept that idea. He didn't that vampire to completely change her sister, he didn't want him to do anything to her. That was just so disgusting, Lizzie didn't deserve that.
There was only one solution. He raised his head and his eyes met Arthur's one. " Arthur, be her maker. "
The vampire raised his eyebrows. Was his friend really serious ? He couldn't be and even he was, Arthur wasn't sure he was ready for this. He was eight hundred years old , he was not young but he couldn't picture himself as a maker. His own maker had been good but was dead now. He had lost his maker and the pain he had felt had nearly killed him. What if he made a child and died ? What if his child died ? Because turning William's sister was dangerous because of Russell. If she became his progeny, he could lose her…
Then, this idea was still appealing… William trusted him with his sister, his sweet little sister. And Arthur could really imagine her as a vampire somehow. It was also true that he owed this to his friend.
" Please, Arthur. I trust you with her, you'll be great and she won't have to be with Godric. There's something about him. I don't want her to be with him, he's already giving her his blood and it's disgusting to see how much she likes that. I can't allow him to turn her but my father trusts him. " He was begging his friend.
" Alright. "
William stood up. " Thank you, thank you so much. " He was relieved even if Lizzie was still becoming a vampire, he was glad that Arthur was going to turn her. He trusted him with his life and with Lizzie because he had already helped him with Russell. Arthur had done everything he could in order to protect him.
" I will know when Godric will turn her, you'll just have to take her. " William said as he ran a hand through his brown hair. " You should come home with me, I'll invite you him and you'll see her. "
Arthur nodded and a few minutes later they were in front of William's house. He entered and quickly invited his friend inside. They quickly made their way towards Lizzie's room.
" William, who's this ? " Someone asked.
" A friend, mother. I think he can help Lizzie. " William quickly answered his mother. Mary was sitting on the bed, where her daughter was laying, moaning in pain. She was burning and there was nothing her mother could do to help her. However, she wasn't blind and knew that William's friend was a vampire. It angered her because she was tired of vampire.
" I don't think it's a good idea, William. Don't you think you've already done enough ? " She hadn't meant to say those last words, it wasn't her son's fault but she was going to lose her daughter no matter what was going to happen. That was only because of vampires…
William clenched his teeth.. He deserved that, he knew it but he also knew that his mother still loved him. " He will help Lizzie. I'm sure about that. "
" How can I know that he's not controlling your mind ? How can I know he's trustworthy ? " Mary asked, knowing what vampires could do.
" You and I both know that it doesn't on me. It works on you but not me, he can't control me and by the way Arthur already helped me. " William answered, that was true. Glamour didn't work on him, just like it didn't work on his father. That was something strange but very useful. " Trust me but maybe you should leave. "
Mary didn't answer but left. She definitely didn't want to see another vampire near her daughter and especially if he was going to give her blood too. She tolerated Godric but this one, she didn't really know what to think about him.
" She's still angry at me. I can understand her. " William said as he watched his friend sitting next to his sister on the bed. The vampire placed his cold hand on Elizabeth's forehead. That was probably helping or so William hoped.
William heard his sister moaning Godric's name and anger boiled inside of him because he didn't know at this very moment if she was moaning in pain or pleasure. That was just disgusting but soon it will be over.
" Can't you give her your blood, Arthur ? " William asked again, hoping that this time his answer would be different.
" No, I can't. It won't work. You'll just tell me when you want me to turn her. " Arthur answered as he stared at the young girl laying here. He was fascinated, soon she would be his Child. She would surely make an amazing vampire, he could feel it.
" May I ask you something else, Arthur ? " William asked and the vampire's attention fell on his friend. " When she'll be a vampire, I don't want her to know why she's like that, why she had to endure this pain. She can't know this is all my fault. She can't know about Russell or about anything else. I don't want her to hate me. " William added.
Arthur stared at his friend. " She will never hate you. She'll get used to be a vampire. "
" I hope so. I also want you to take care of her when we will all be dead. She'll be immortal while we will all grow old and die.. "
Arthur smiled sadly. " There's another way, you know.. You can become a vampire too. "
William laughed at his friend's proposal. Of course, he had thought about that but he didn't really know if he could. Maybe later he would think about that, but now he should only think about his sister.
I wished I could fight him, I wished I was older than him… But here I was stuck with Godric. I didn't want to listen to him, I wasn't ready for what was going to happen, I would never be ready for that.
" I know exactly what you're going to say and I don't want to hear it. I just want to leave. Thank you for saving me from The Magister. " I said, trying to control my trembling voice.
The way his eyes pierced through my skin made me want to hide. He was probably hating every part of me, and I could understand why. Who could love someone who only hurt everyone ?
" You're such selfish brat Elizabeth ! You always believe that you know everything, that you know what I am feeling but you are completely wrong. I'm furious, because you're always so stubborn, because you're always thinking that I'm trying to control you while I'm just worried for you. I want you to stay safe, alive but you just seem to love trouble ! How do you think I feel when I know you're putting yourself in danger ? You've never thought about that, you only think about yourself and I'm tired of this shit. You are not like that, I know you. " He paused as he took unnecessary breaths. " You may have forgotten but I've made a promise to your maker too, I told him I'll keep you safe… I can't do this if you keep doing this. And I don't want to torture myself because of you. I love you but there are things I can't accept Elizabeth. "
I stayed silent, what could I say ? He wasn't going to reject me but he was tired of me. I couldn't keep doing this, I didn't want to hurt him anymore because he didn't deserve that. " Then, maybe I should leave because I don't want to hurt you anymore. "
" You're not listening to what I'm saying, don't you ? " He said, angry. " I don't want you to leave, I want us to be together but not like that. I don't want to be worried all the time, I don't want you to be always so anxious and annoying ! "
I didn't want to be like that. I wanted to be the old Lizzie, when I was so carefree but my fear was controlling me. My stupidity was controlling me.
In fact, Russell had not only killed my maker, but he had killed a part of me. And he was going to destroy my relationship with Godric if I continued to act like that. " Will you give me another chance ? I truly love you." I whispered and stared at the ground. I couldn't look at him in the eyes.
He sighed. " I will give you another chance but you must promise me to never act like that again. "
Could I really make that promise ? I wasn't sure because I couldn't control myself sometimes, every time. I had to change, this was my last chance, I knew it. Godric was worth it, he deserved to be loved. " I promise you that I will never do that again. "
" Good. " He simply said and I looked at him. He was still staring at me and I was still a little bit uncomfortable. I knew he had not forgiven me and I knew that it would take a long time for him to forgive me.
" What are we going to do now that Eric's in Jackson and Pam's with The Magister ? " I asked and played with my hands because of how nervous I was.
I hope you liked this chapter ! Even with my exams, I posted it even if it may not be my best chapter... What do you think ?
Now, since two persons suggested it, there will be Godric's POV in the next chapter ! I want to thank cece67 and DarkAngel620 for this idea ! It's so great ! I hope you'll like what I'll do with that idea.
Now, a huge thanks to princess moon shadow, Artemis Wolfe, Carlypso, cece67, DarkAngel620 and Nicola for their reviews !
Anyway, don't forget to leave me a little comment please ? I really need it !