Can't Say Goodbye

"For the record, I don't like walking around Omega without my armor," I say. Jenny and I are walking to Afterlife after sort of sneaking out of the clinic. Well… "sneaking" might be a bit dramatic, but neither of us wanted to find out what would happen if Daniel spotted me out of bed this soon.

"We were in a hurry," Jenny says. "Besides, maybe with just a shield generator, you'll remember to stay out of combat if we run into any." She smirks at me.

I stick my tongue out at her. "Oh ha ha, very funny."

We continue along in silence for a while, just listening to the sounds of Omega. They range from the mundane—the constant hum of the station's ventilation system, water running through the countless miles of piping—to the kind that you can only get on Omega—vorcha hissing just out of sight, hushed whispers in a dark alley, distant gunfire. It all combines into something purely unique to this hellhole. Another gunshot goes off, sounding slightly closer than previous ones. I barely react to it, but I notice Jenny tense up a little before relaxing again.

"Don't worry about that," I say, trying to put her at ease a bit. "That sounded at least a few sectors away. We're nowhere near it."

"You seem to forget that it's my job to be wary of gunshots," she says. "If anything, I'm surprised at how blasé you are about it."

I shrug, not really knowing what she wants to hear. "I guess a year and a half of living here desensitizes you a bit."

"I don't quite think that's a good thing," she says. "But it makes sense. Still, I'm sorry you had to be here so long that that happened in the first place."

"Jenny, nothing about that is your fault," I say, wanting to nip that train of thought in the bud. "I could have gone anywhere in the galaxy, and my stupid ass decided to come here. Besides, it brought us back together, didn't it?" I reach out and squeeze her hand, smiling at her.

She returns the squeeze and the smile but doesn't let my hand go. Not like I'm in any hurry to move it. "You're right. And hey, seeing you in Mordin's clinic might have been the first good surprise I got after, well… everything."

"See? It all worked out for the best." Her casual mention of her death takes me by surprise, but I try not to bring attention to it. Even after only a few weeks, she's made leaps and bounds in that area, and I'm super proud of her for it.

We settle back into silence, probably about half way to Afterlife at this point. Even though this is Omega, I really enjoy the simple intimacy of holding hands with Jenny. It's nice… despite the setting.

Soon enough, the low thumping of a techno bassline creeps into the symphony of Omega. We turn a few more corners and enter the courtyard in front of the queen's castle. A lone asari wearing a sort of red armored jumpsuit stands some distance away from the entrance queue. Oh, I guess I'll get to meet Samara. I hope I don't say anything stupid to get on her bad side. Having a Justicar as an enemy would be… bad. As we get closer, she turns towards us, noticing our approach.

Wow… I think out of all the squadmates, the games do Samara the least justice. Her sharp features very much contrast your typical asari. Liara, for example, has a very rounded face with fairly soft facial features. Samara, meanwhile, has a jawline, cheekbones, and nose that look like they could cut a man. Beyond that, though, she just has this… air about her—a perfect self-confidence that can only be born through centuries of self-reflection. She looks just as much a queen here as Aria.

"Did you have any luck gathering information?" Jenny asks Samara as we approach.

"Unfortunately, no. The citizens here seem reluctant to converse with a Justicar," Samara says.

"Then let's hope Aria has something for us." Jenny pauses then seems to realize something. "Oh, Samara, this is Dylan, the only member of my crew you haven't met yet. Dylan, this is Justicar Samara."

I nod my head respectfully. "A pleasure, Samara," I say, deciding to keep it simple.

"A friend of Shepard's is a friend of mine," she says, also nodding. "Will you be assisting us in our task today?"

"Only in gathering intel," Jenny says for me. "He's under doctor's orders not to engage in combat." She gives me a pointed look.

"When combat becomes necessary, I shall engage her on my own," Samara says.

"Well first we need to find her. So as much as I'm loath to do this, let's go see Aria."

As always, the sheer presence of Afterlife assaults us when we walk in. The sounds, the smells, the sights, all combine into a cacophony of sensory inputs. Part of me still thinks Aria makes this her base of operations as a way to throw people off balance. In any case, we weave our way through the crowd and quickly find ourselves climbing the stairs to her little balcony.

Luckily this time, there's no issue with her security guy. Instead, Aria just motions with her head for Jenny to take a seat. Her eyes, however, stay on me as Samara and I stand in front of her.

"Owens, I should thank you for that little issue you took care of for me," Aria says. She turns her head to look at where Jenny has taken a seat on the couch. "Though I suppose you're ultimately the one to thank, Shepard."

"Then I guess that means you owe me one," Jenny says, a little smile playing at the corner of her mouth.

Aria narrows her eyes, her mouth pressing into a thin line. Then she laughs. "Alright, Shepard. Sure. I owe you one. A small one."

"Perfect. And now I'd like to cash it in." Aria's expression reverts to her usual cold, calculating stare. She doesn't say anything, however, so Jenny continues. "An asari fugitive is hiding out here, and we need to find her. She's an ardat-yakshi."

Aria's face contorts into a look of disgust. "I knew it," she says. "Nothing leaves a body quite as… empty as an ardat-yakshi does."

"You mean she's already taken a victim?" Jenny asks. "She's barely been here a day."

"Who's to say what kind of appetite one of those things has."

"You haven't taken steps to kill her?" Samara asks, butting into the conversation.

"Why would I?" Aria asks back. "She hasn't tried to seduce me. Besides, I figured killing her would be your job." She smirks at Samara before turning back to Jenny. "Her victim was some bum, probably an emergency snack to tide her over."

Damn, I guess us being so close on Morinth's heels changes the series of events a bit. But how is Jenny gonna find out Morinth's interests now? I can remember like one or two of them, but honestly, my memory has been slipping on the small stuff lately.

"Anything else you know? Possible leads?" Jenny asks.

"Try the VIP section. Turn some heads, catch her eye. I'm sure that shouldn't be a problem for someone like you, Shepard. I can get you one entrance into VIP, tonight only. Consider us even."

"Thanks for the help, Aria." Jenny stands up to leave.

"Good luck finding her," Aria says as Jenny passes by. "Better luck catching her."

Jenny pauses for half a step before continuing out of the private balcony. Samara and I quickly follow behind her. She leads us outside of Afterlife and away some distance before finally stopping to face us. Specifically, to face me.

"Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but would you mind explaining what that 'favor' was about?" she asks.

I rub the back of my neck and look away. Whoops… I guess I forgot to mention that part. "When I got here, Aria requested my presence. She had a little fun fucking with me before giving me some info about the Suns who took Vi. Apparently, she wasn't a big fan of Giles, either, but she couldn't do anything too direct about it. The implication being that I would take care of him in exchange for the info."

Jenny closes her eyes and pinches the bridge of her nose. "A little warning would have been nice, but it all worked out in the end. At least now we have a lead."

"I am not surprised that Morinth would seek her victims in such a place," Samara says.

"We've got a where, but what about a how?" I ask. "As in, how are you gonna get her attention in VIP?"

"I'll figure something out," Jenny says. "I'm a bit more concerned about what happens once she approaches me. I need to interest her enough to get her alone somewhere. Samara, any idea what her interests are?"

"Any knowledge I would have on that topic would be 400 years out of date. Though, she took a delighted interest in the latests popular culture as a child."

Jenny looks to me. "Any ideas there, Dylan? I doubt Samara or I are particularly well-versed in pop culture."

Oh shit, here's an opportunity to drop some game knowledge. Though it figures it's about something I barely remember. I think for a moment, trying to dredge up whatever memories I can about this particular topic.

"Uhh… let's see," I say, just speaking as things come. "There's this one artsy vid that's gotten pretty big. Vaenia, I think. Haven't seen it myself, but it's apparently a lot more violent than you'd expect. Um, what else… uhh, Expel 10 released a new album that's been extremely popular. Oh, and just knowing the crowd that typically gets into VIP, I wouldn't be surprised if drugs are a popular thing; though, I'd have no idea about specifics." And that's about all I can remember from the game. I shrug and give Jenny an apologetic look. "Can't say I've had much time for pop culture, either. Sorry."

"It's better than nothing," Jenny says. "I'll ask around the ship once we get back, see if anyone can add anything. We've got a few hours before peak club time, so let's head back to the Normandy."

"I will continue my investigation, Shepard," Samara says. "Please contact me when you wish to begin the mission." Jenny nods, and Samara walks off into the wilds of Omega.

"So is there anything you feel like doing back on the ship?" I ask.

"Absolutely nothing," she says, letting out a heavy sigh. "I'd love nothing more than to take a nap."

"Then why don't you?"

She pauses for a long moment, staring off into space.

"Uhh… hello? Omega to Jenny?"

"Let's go," she says, suddenly grabbing my arm and leading me somewhere. I stumble a few steps before catching my balance.

"Whoa, where are we going?"

"Back to the Normandy. I'm taking a nap, and you've been recruited as my pillow."

I barely suppress a laugh. "Aye aye, Commander," I say, following her back to the ship.

We reach the Normandy in short order. No one bothers us on our way in, so Jenny makes a beeline for the elevator. Once in her room, she firmly sits me down on the couch and grabs a set of clothes from her dresser.

"Don't move, I'll be right back," she says.

"Don't worry, I'll be here," I say, chuckling. As the bathroom door closes, I briefly contemplate hiding somewhere, but a quick look around doesn't turn up many good places for it. Besides, that'd be kind of mean, and I'm actually really looking forward to this.

Jenny emerges from the bathroom in short order, wearing her typical loungewear. She grabs a blanket from the bed and plops down next to me on the couch. Then she lies down on her back, resting her head on my thigh. With a final deep breath, a smile forms on her face. I can't help but smile back.

"So why the sudden change of heart?" I ask, idly running a hand through her hair.

"I guess you just put it in perspective for me a little," she says. "I didn't think I had time to just… do this. Or even deserved it, to be honest."

Ok, that sets off a tiny little warning bell in my head, but it seems like she still has more to say. But I won't forget that.

"I don't know. It feels like everyone has this… expectation of me. I'm always 'Commander Shepard, the hero,' and sometimes that gets to me. There's always a new fire to put out, and if one isn't immediately obvious, then I should be looking for one."

"That's no way to live," I say, unable to stay silent.

She sighs and turns onto her side. "I know. But it's hard. It's hard to break out of that mindset. I wanted to nap but felt like there were more important things I should be doing. But you just asking 'why not' made me realize that there wasn't anything important going on right now. Realize that I could just nap." She curls her legs up to her chest and puts a hand on my leg. "So thank you."

"I'm really happy that I could inadvertently help you with this. And it means so much that you'd even tell me any of this. Is there anything you need from me that could help you with this?"

Jenny lets out a sad little laugh. "God, this is gonna sound so corny, but just… keep treating me like a real person? Sometimes I just need that little reminder to break out of my commander headspace."

"Deal," I say, placing my hand on hers. "Now, get some rest… commander."

She doesn't answer. Over the next few minutes, her breathing becomes more even and regular. Her whole body relaxes. This is the most peaceful I've seen her look in… maybe ever. I smile, unable to take my eyes off her.

God, that conversation was… a lot. Though, now that I think about it, some of our conversations in the days leading up to me leaving make a bit more sense. I know that she was still coming to grips with her death and subsequent revival, but this sounds like it's been floating around in her head since the SR1 days. And honestly, now that I take a moment to actually think about it myself, I shouldn't be surprised. Ever since becoming a Spectre, she's practically had the weight of the galaxy on her shoulders. Hell, even before that, she was basically the poster child for the Alliance.

A tiny part of me feels bad because I've been just as guilty in the past of treating her like more of a hero than a person. I like to think I'd improved in that respect since the days chasing Saren, but now I know to make and effort to do better. Jenny deserves at least that much.

####################

Jenny ended up napping for two hours. Thankfully, no one needed her, or at least they knew better than to bother her for a while. I spend most of the time just messing around on my omni-tool. At one point, I looked up famous elcor artists because I had a vague recollection of that being another conversation point with Morinth. It took a little digging, but eventually I recognized the name "Forta." I made sure to tell Jenny about that after she woke up.

At the moment, she's finishing up preparations for VIP, so I'm waiting just outside her quarters. We talked about it a bit earlier, and we decided that I won't accompany her to VIP. I wouldn't be able to get in, and since I'm not combat ready at the moment, I wouldn't even be any use if things went south. Not quite a huge fan of the decision, but I can't really argue with it. Plus, it's a very personal issue for Samara, and I have a feeling she wants to have as few people in on it as necessary.

The door opens, and my eyes widen. Jenny's wearing the same black cocktail dress she wore to Hock's party. Wow. My god, she is beautiful, and unlike last time, I don't feel guilty appreciating the sight.

"You look fantastic," I say. "Just showing up will be enough to turn some heads."

She blushes and looks away, smiling. "That's what I was going for," she says. She takes a deep breath and looks ahead. "I've already called Samara, so I should get going."

As she passes me to enter the elevator, I grab her hand on an impulse. She turns to look at me with a confused expression.

"Jenny…."

"I'll be fine, Dylan," she says, trying to sound confident. It almost works, but there's the barest hint of uncertainty in her voice. I look down, and our eyes lock.

"I know, but..." I trail off, hypnotized by her eyes. Without any real conscious thought, I lean down and press my lips against hers. The kiss is quick, and when I pull back, I gaze back into her eyes. "Good luck."

I let go of her hands, but she just stands there for a while longer, our eyes still locked. Honestly, she looks a little… shocked. All of the sudden, she grabs my face and pulls me down to her. Again, our lips meet, but this time is much deeper and more intimate. Time seems to stop, and everything except her fades into insignificance.

Finally, she breaks the kiss and pulls back, letting me straighten up.

"I thought I could use some more luck," she says a little breathlessly. Then she walks into the elevator, leaving me standing with a dumbfounded look.

I blink a few times, my brain trying to catch up to what just happened. Even though that wasn't our first kiss, something about it felt different. More real. I don't know. In any case, that was… something else.

Well now I need to find something to do with the rest of my day. Wait, shit, I still haven't actually spoken to Vi. She was asleep the entire time I was stuck in the clinic. I need to make sure she's ok. I also need to try convincing her to leave Omega. While it was never a safe place to begin with, this is the second time she's been directly targeted.

My mind made up, I leave the Normandy and go back out into Omega. Thankfully, no one bothers me on my trip back to the clinic. As I walk through the door, Alani looks up from her desk and smiles at me.

"There you are," she says. "Daniel came around looking for you, but I kept quiet."

"Thanks, Alani, I owe you one," I say, returning the smile.

I walk by her to head towards room four, but she catches my attention again. "Last I heard, Violet was awake. You were the first person she asked about."

"Really?"

"Well, Ronon was sitting right next to her, so she didn't need to ask about him. But a certain someone else ran off." Alani grins, clearly poking fun.

"And now I'm back," I say, returning the grin. "But thanks for the heads up." She nods in response and lets me go.

Reaching room four, I open the door. Violet still lies in bed, but she turns her head towards the door, clearly awake. I break into one of the biggest smiles I've ever smiled in my life, and she quickly returns it as I rush over to her bed.

"Violet!"

"Dylan!"

We both pause before devolving into a fit of giggles at talking over each other like that. I lean down and pull her into a tight hug, being mindful of her leg. She returns it with equal intensity, and we both cling to each other for a minute, not saying anything. Vi is still laughing, but I occasionally hear a sniffle in there, too.

Eventually we both let go. I grab a chair so I can sit next to the bed. All the while, I can't stop smiling. Though now that I'm here, I don't really know what to say. I mean, what is there to say?

"You weren't here when I woke up," Vi says with another sniffle, deciding to speak first.

Fuck, she always manages to say something that sends a pang of guilt straight through my heart. And it always catches me off guard.

"I'm sorry, Vi. A few things came up on the Normandy, and I had to go deal with them." I reach out and grab her hand. "But I'm here now, and I don't plan on going anywhere for awhile."

"You better not. I need time to yell at you for how stupid you were in that alley." She says it with a smile, but her voice implies that she's being at least somewhat serious.

"Would you believe me if I said that was all part of my plan?"

"Not in the slightest."

"Well, had to try," I say.

She looks at me for a long moment. "What were you thinking?" she finally asks. "Your freedom for mine? I was terrified the whole time they had me, but when I heard that, my heart almost stopped. You had to have known that was their plan all along, right?"

"I was scared, Vi. Honestly, I was too scared to care about my safety. Yours was the only thing that mattered—to both me and Ronon. I'm sorry our dumb decisions put you in even more danger."

Another palpable silence sets in. She has every right to be angry at me. None of this would have happened to me if I hadn't gone off on Giles at that party. But she's alive. It's ok if she's angry at me for a while.

"Come closer," she says, again breaking the silence. I furrow my brow but do as I'm told, scooting my chair closer to the bed. "Closer." I hesitantly lean in even closer.

"Vi, what are you—"

She slaps my forehead.

"Ow! What was that for?" I ask, leaning back and rubbing where she just hit.

"For being stupid. Yes, you acted like an idiot, but you also saved my life. So no pity party, ok? It all turned out for the best."

I smile and lean down to hug her again. "You're right, like always."

"Of course I am," she says, smug little smile in place. "So, now that that's out of the way, I have a very important question for you: What ever happened with you and Shepard?"

I laugh. I laugh so hard I stop making actual sounds. I'm like folding in on myself, occasionally letting out a little squeak with how hard I laugh.

"Of all the— things you could have— asked me— I was— not expecting that," I manage to say, gasping for breath between laughs.

"Hey, it's not my fault you never messaged me back, even though you promised you would," she says, sticking her tongue out at me.

I take a few more moments to regain my composure. Finally I take a few breaths without laughing. "Well, your advice worked."

Vi throws her arms up in the air and cheers. "YES! I knew I was right! Tell me everything."

I blush, as seems to happen when I talk to Vi about this kind of thing. "Like I said, your advice worked. I started off by bringing up the mission, and I saw her blush. A few more things were said, and then she kissed me again."

Violet s quees and claps her hands excitedly. "That is absolutely adorable! Dylan, I am so happy for you! I knew you had it bad for Shepard for the longest time."

"You and half the Normandy crew, apparently," I say, laughing. "Can you believe they had a betting pool on when we'd get together?"

"I absolutely believe it. What are friends for if they don't bet on your love life? Did you know that before Ronon and I got together, the other nurses and receptionists had a bet going on when you and I would start dating?"

I stare at her, eyes wide, before both of us crack up. Holy shit, really? Me and Violet?

"We should have pretended we were and tried to get some money out of it," I say.

"Oh man, if I had known about it at the time, absolutely."

We finish laughing, and the conversation slowly moves on to other topics. I gotta say, I missed being around Vi. Y'know, I never really thought about it before, but I've easily spent the most time in this universe with her. The SR1 crew was only together for a few months, and I only lived with Ian and Garrus for a few months more than that. Vi, on the other hand, I've been around for almost a year and a half. Hell, not just been around, lived with.

And to think I almost lost her. Nope, no, Vi said no pity party. But at the same time, that reminds me that I wanted to talk to her about potentially leaving Omega. It's not like she needs to worry about job security; I would think any clinic or hospital would accept an Omega-trained nurse.

The conversation eventually hits a lull, and I decide to bring up the whole "leaving" thing. "So I've got a question."

"Go for it," she says.

"I'm just gonna come right out and say it: Have you considered the possibility of leaving Omega? Of finding somewhere else to work?"

"What? I—!" she stops herself. She snorts and looks down, a sad smile on her face. "You know, Ronon asked the same thing earlier." Wait, really? Ronon? That's… unexpected. "I'd hate to just give up like that."

"I don't think it's giving up at this point, Vi," I say. "I think it's called self-preservation. I hate to bring it up, but this is the second time the Suns targeted you directly."

"So just leave? Leave the clinic? Leave all the people who need help here? That's the whole reason I came to Omega in the first place! I wanted to help people who needed it more than anyone else! What does it say about me if I just leave them behind?"

"I know how much this means to you, but is it worth your life?" I stop myself before I say something that crosses a line because hoo boy there are some things I could have said. "Look, you don't need to make a decision this very instant. Just… please at least consider it?"

She stays silent for a while, staring down at her lap. Her hands clench and unclench a few times. She sighs.

"If just one of you had brought this up, I might have ignored it," she says quietly. "But both of you? I love you both so much, and if this means that much to you, I'll at least think about it. And talk about it with Ronon." She smiles. "He said he's staying by my side no matter my decision, so if I do leave, it needs to be to somewhere he's ok with, too."

"I'm sure no matter where you went, he'd be ok with it as long as he's with you," I say, also smiling. A thought suddenly springs to mind. I think I know someone who could make use of Ronon's… unique services. "Speaking of Ronon, I think I know someone who would welcome someone of his talent—assuming you decide to leave, of course."

She quirks an eyebrow at me. "Well, you might as well tell me. It might factor into a decision."

"I know an information broker on Illium who could always use someone like him. Plus, there are bound to be some smaller clinics there you could work at since I know hospitals aren't exactly your thing."

"I'll keep that in mind," she says.

As I go to respond, my omni-tool pings. I glance down just to see who it's from, only to see that it's Jenny. I look back and Vi and motion to my wrist. "Do you mind if I…?"

"Is it your girlfriend?" she asks in a sing-songy voice.

Maybe," I say, fighting a blush.

"Just look at it, dummy. You're not gonna hurt my feelings or anything."

I just smile and open up the message. Hey Dylan, just got back from the mission. Before you ask, it was successful. But now I need you back on the Normandy. Something big has come up. We leave in an hour.

My expression falls. Something important? We're post-Horizon, a few missions in, so… it's the Collector Ship. Shit. Even after more than two years, I haven't forgotten how much that mission sucks. Even if it doesn't go the way it did in-game, I can't imagine it'll be pleasant.

"Hey, is everything ok?" Vi asks, probably noticing my expression.

"Yeah…," I say slowly. "Yeah, just got news that we're leaving within the hour, so I need to hurry back to the Normandy."

"Damn… I knew you'd have to leave again, but… I hoped you could at least stick around a few days."

"So did I, Vi. But hey, at least we finally remembered vid calls were a thing. Keep me in the loop with whatever you and Ronon decide on, ok?" I stand up from the chair then lean down to pull Vi into a hug.

"I will," she says into my shoulder. "Be safe, ok? Promise?"

"I promise, Violet."

I kiss the top of her head and break the hug. I can't bring myself to say goodbye this time, and it looks like she's in a similar boat. So I just smile, squeeze her hand one more time, and head back to the Normandy.

A/N: And so, we leave Omega, hopefully for the last time. Fuck that place. On a separate note, I've started to go back and edit WttF. The first chapter has the reasons, but basically it comes down to a pride thing. If you want, give the revised chapters a read. If you don't care, that's fine. Nothing major will change.

Anywho, hope you enjoyed the chapter. Till next time, ta ta!